Unca Harlan's Art Deco Dining Pavilion

Archive - 08/23/03 to 05/22/03

I received my copies of "Demon" and "Illustrated H.E." today. Both were in excellent condition, thanks. In yesterday's mail there was a mailing from HERC... was that complimentary or can I count myself among its members?

Shakespearan snotful, er, snootful, and that which be humour
Ah. Dang. Sarcasm just don't wing it here. Say, Rick, could you rig up a sound card, maybe a WAV card, and when someone wanted to 'snoot' as it were, one could introduce a line of code that effectively generated the sound of a Bronx cheer, thereby informing all that what just transpired was, indeed, sarcasm.

Yes, Mr. Ellison, I wuz hopin' that SOMEBODY here wasn't serious about not liking a certain tome.

But what do I know? I live across the street from the real-life version of Cousin Eddie from "National Lampoon's Vacation" and he is so much more entertaining than Simon of "American Idol".

My two cents.

Until next time. . .

Ben: I just started Moby Dick myself. A friend and I are planning to "force" each other to read it by assigning ourselves pages and then discussing it, because for some reason, both of us have had trouble getting through it in the past. Maybe you could somehow join in if you're interested. Also, we're considering The Brothers Karamazov next and then Ulysses, also books I feel I must read but haven't. Maybe I'll also add Gravity's Rainbow...I do have the whole summer.

Dear Mr Ellison,

I'd be sad to think that your final decision was final.

Hopefully you'll read my post whether you choose to respond or not. If I don't answer to everything you've said you can assume I may have disagreed with you about whatever it was, but that I've chosen not to argue about it.

About me being "high maintenance...If by that you mean that sometimes it might take more than the average amount of energy to deal with me then I might have to agree. You're certainly not the first to have said this, and I expect I'll hear it again sometime.

I don't see *you* as being responsible for maintaining me, though. Not in any way. I believe that I'm responsible for maintaining myself. I've been okay with presenting an unperturbed front to you. I had no argument with the advise I got to do that, and I followed it comfortably. I found it a great deal harder to take my friend's suggestion that I tell you I was upset. In fact I barely managed it. In part that's because I wasn't agreeable to the idea that I might make you feel I was asking you to be responsible for me. Not even for a moment. I believe I've caused the problems between us and so I consider them mine to solve, or walk away from. I didn't think it was a right thing to do to go crying to you because I was distressed by how you chose to deal with things regarding me. I took the advise of a trusted friend in expressing what I did. Even then I wasn't asking you to take care of me. I was just saying...You choosing not to deal with me causes me pain and costs me tears. I'm saying no more and no less than that.


By the way, I got another brilliant piece of advise from my friend regarding you this morning. He said that if you were important to me, then I might want to look to how I can be of benefit to you. He said I should ask myself what I might have to contribute, what I might have to offer you that could add to your life, rather than taxing your already badly drained personal resources. (In other words he said, in his own gentle and polite way, that I might want to quit being a such a huge pain in your ass, and aim instead at becoming an asset to you)

As you can probably understand it did nothing but reaffirm my confidence in his wisdom to then discover that in your post to me you basically confirmed his advise, by complaining that I've been anything *but* an asset to you so far.

And to make a long message short that is what you said. You don't want to deal with it. It looks to you to be way more trouble than it's worth.

I can understand how you may have gotten that impression. I'm not exactly in my element on message boards. Meetng me here, you're not "seeing" me at my best. To say the least.


In closing, I'm tempted to try to come up with a tidy summation, but really, for the moment I haven't got anything else to say.

Diana

Sorry to post twice, but I'm a good widdle boy most of the time, so I guess it's OK.

First, to Frank, about this Michael hoffman character. I haven't heard of him before, but a quick Google search turned up a few websites pushing his wares. Gahd, what a nut; not just a Holocaust Revisionist, but a full-fledged occult-conspiracy enthusiast, with a deep (i.e., pathological) fascination with Jewish conspiracies.

I have to disagree with you on style, however. I don't think he's a terribly good writer. He's lucid enough to write a passable essay, but I wouldn't place him alongside of such stylists as Vidal or Hitchens.

To David Loftus: I have to agree with Earl. Figure: Here's a lecture by Jorge Luis Borges, one of the greatest fantasists then alive, and it may be the one time that the people in that room could see him in the flesh. (I missed my chance in the early 1980s at college.) There's Ellison, clearly upset that some feebs have ruined a work of art on his house, but clearly out to pay homage to one of his greaters. So this young lady passes him a note to remind him of that incident-- with the teasing implicaton that the egger can be _anywhere_, even at places like a Borges lecture, and they'll never face the music for their behavior. Only funny part was when she came out to find her car covered with eggs.

Welll, I finished David Morrell's FIRST BLOOD a day ago (the Rambo of the book and the Rambo of the movie are such completely different entities it's breathtaking), and I'm having some difficulty choosing my next novel for the summer. Right now it's a tie between IVANHOE or MOBY DICK.

Which one would you guys recommend going for first?

"The Days, And Nights Of Elzabeth"
Hmmm. Perplexing. The insatiable depeletion of toys. That's quite a predicament. Let me think on that, and get back to you.

Are you over eighteen? Would you consider marriage?

David, I gotta tell ya, that local novelist sounds about as funny as a prison term. I hope they got her car with ostrich eggs.

I was looking at the Harlan pic and his jacket actually looks like the jean jacket Billy Jack wore in the movie. Harlan had a Bill Bixby with longer hair thing going on. Tee.

--------------------

Brian, you ever hear of one Michael A Hoffman? He is a holocaust denier. The sad thing is that this guy is a marvelous writer, style wise. Too bad he fucks it up with such a sick political ideal. It really bugs me when talented people become fanatics. A shame.

---------------

I never ever thought I would have solidarity with the Dixie Chicks, but god bless them. Stay tenacious girls. Iraq is now falling apart, and Bush deserves all the scorn he can get--from all venues.

-----------------

"I, as a Socialist, have had to preach, as much as anyone, the enormous power of the environment. We can change it; we must change it; there is absolutely no other sense in life than the task of changing it. What is the use of writing plays, what is the use of writing anything, if there is not a will which finally moulds chaos itself into a race of gods. "

----George Bernard Shaw

An untoward incident in the life of the Hero
Okay, I'm going to break the only-one-a-day rule here, but I think you'll all find this is worth it. It's definitely 100 percent HE content:

You never know where an Ellison story is going to pop up.

Last night I was interviewing a local novelist about her latest book, just out in paperback, and after getting what I needed for my story I turned off my tape recorder, laid aside my pen and tablet, and we visited writer-to-writer, off the record.

At one point, I mentioned HE’s “Schenectady” retort for people who ask where he gets his ideas, and my new acquaintance’s eyes lit up and she asked whether I wanted to hear her Ellison story. But of course!

One evening in the 1970s, when she was living in LA, my informant and her boyfriend were watching TV and Ellison was a guest on Tom Snyder. Some kids had been egging his house, and HE apparently went into a rant about them, looking hard into the camera and saying “I’m gonna get you, you pusillanimous pismires!” Snyder immediately called for a station break, my friend and her guy laughed and turned off the TV and promptly forgot about it.

Several nights later, however, they went to see Jorge Luis Borges give a public lecture. He had a hypnotic speaking style, just like his writing, she said, and everyone in the audience was in a worshipful daze. Gradually she realized that sitting a few rows in front of her was none other than Harlan Ellison.

My informant got an idea. She took out a slip of paper and wrote on it: “Have an egg. A raw egg. P. Pismeier” (her spelling). Then she prevailed on the people in the intervening rows to hand it up to HE. You could see the veins popping out the back of his neck as he read it, she claimed. Of course she tried her best to look utterly innocent as he looked around and scanned the crowd. Nothing further occurred at the hall.

Now, my informant and her guy had made a crude tape recording of the Borges lecture, and they wanted nothing more than to listen to it all, immediately, so they drove around LA for an hour or more, listening on the tape deck to the lecture they had just witnessed. Then they decided to stop somewhere for a bite to eat.

When they came out afterward, their car had been thoroughly egged. Coincidence? My informant wasn’t sure, but I don’t think so!

She added, however, that she never forgot something she read in an Ellison interview when she was in her 20s, around that same period. The interviewer had asked him what he thought of the attitude among young, aspiring writers that the odds are impossibly stacked against them unless than can get the right agent, the right publisher, a big break, etc., etc. (which notion my new friend said she has encountered repeatedly since becoming an established author herself).

In her paraphrase, Ellison’s response was that this is bullshit. Cream rises to the top. If you write something good, you’ll have to beat them off with a stick. She said that answer rang a bell in the back of her head and she thought, he’s right.

So I hope there’s no hard feelings, you humorless snoot-in-the-air.

[Note: though I'd heard the word "pismire" before, I just had to look it up. No, it's not Yiddish in origin, which would have been my call, but Norwegian(!): from "piss" (urine) + "mire" (ant). It's a formica ant, whatever that is. But obviously this relates to the Americanism "pissant". . . .]

Well, that'll teach me to mention Canadian comic books in a post...

Leo Bachle, who created and drew Johnny Canuck's comic book adventures for the Bell Canadian comic books of the 1940s, died recently. If you're going 'Who?' to either Bachle or Canuck, try here -- http://www.skypoint.com/members/schutz19/jcanuck.htm or here -- http://flat_earth.blogspot.com/2003_05_18_flat_earth_archive.html#94591325

Strange note? Bachle changed his name to Les Barker and became a nightclub entertainer and movie and television actor after he left comic books. Johnny Canuck did get a Canada Post stamp back around 1995 in a set honouring various Canadian comic creations.

This has been a Heritage Minute.

Cheers, Jon

I know this will drive Eric crazy, but I just got a peek at the photo of Ellison, and its better, the back cover of Scott's UK-BC edition.

Jay, you're wrong. That pic was taken during the time in the late seventies when Mr. Ellison, in a pique of interest, did a stint as host of the syndicated program "Dance Fever" under one of his many psuedonyms, Denny Terrio.

So many advantages to living in Northern Ontario.

Love to All, Melissa

Eric,

Hey, your parents and Pohl are in my old stomping grounds of Palatine! Lived there for a few years in the 90's before escaping to the city. I still remember when Palatine was fields and forest; seems so long ago - but at least there are still the Deerpath forest preserves on the north side.

As for Errol Morris, he's #1 on my list of People Most Screwed By The Academy (#2 is, of course, Scorsese). His documentaries are beyond compare, helped immensely by his creation of a camera where the interviewee looks directly at both the lens and the interviewer, avoiding that stale 3/4 of the face look and creating a bizzare intimacy. His subjects are fascinaiting, the writing and editing pearless, and the music choices inspired. Hell, I could go on for hours; and now we'll soon have a Morris doc to really get people riled. His new movie, playing at Cannes, is a look at Robert McNamara, the Beancounter of the Vietnam War.

Regards,
Joseph

Mrs. Ellison, I received the books yesterday. Thank you! And thank you, Mr. Ellison, for signing them. I greatly appreciate it.

On another note, I received a catalog from Wesleyan University Press and on the first page found a book called "Envisioning the Future: Science Fiction and the Next Millennium". Under the list of contributers is Harlan Ellison, along with James Gunn, Walter Mosley, Kim Stanley Robinson and many more. It's apparently due out in September. I thought people would be interested in this.
Wesleyan Univ. Press also publishes a series called Early Classics of Science Fiction. Its website is www.wesleyan.edu/wespress

(Going back into lurkdom)
Debbie

Thompson, Ellison, Polito
I too was delighted to read some comments from HE in the Thompson biography a few years back. I'm no fan of Thompson; I haven't even read any of his novels. I read the bio because Robert Polito was a teacher of mine in college -- I studied Shakespeare and Renaissance British poetry under his tutelage.

A few weeks ago, I was rereading Robert Polito’s wonderful and award-winning biography of Jim Thompson, “Savage Art.” The bio includes some great remembrances by Mr. Ellison, poignant recreations of meetings with Thompson at All American Burger: Mr. E providing a sympathetic ear, as Thompson retraces the sorrows of a hard, tough-break life. I can’t recommend the book highly enough. Polito does a terrific job of capturing not only Thompson, but that fascinating world of mid-century paperback originals. Rereading the Ellison passages in the book made me pause and wonder, “Are there any pop culture legends our man hasn’t palled around with?”

This week, I had the opportunity to read some journals that belonged to another great, if lesser known, master of the American roman noir, Gil Brewer. Brewer was once king of the Fawcett Gold Medal suspenser. Some of his books – like “13 French St.” – sold in the millions. But when the market shifted and sales declined, publishers dropped him like a bad habit and his last days were even more tragic than Thompson’s (if you can believe that.) Anyway, I just thought Mr. E might want to know that while paging through a handwritten Brewer notebook from the mid-70s, I found a list of “writers to read,” and there amongst Jack London and William Faulkner and Henry Miller was the name “Harlan Ellison.”

To Scott Reeston, re Leuchter
I loved the Morris documentary on Leuchter. What I especially liked about it was the fact that I've encountered a _lot_ of people like Leuchter. No, not anti-Semites-- I don't think Leuchter picks up on that sort of thing. I mean people who seem to have a kind of ferocious Asperger's Syndrome. They dwell in this realm where a form of logic is ruthlessly applied, but they're utterly blind, deaf and dumb to the nuances and values that most of us take for granted.

Take the scene in the movie where Leuchter chats about the medical physics of execution. When he talks about the meat separating from the bone, I don't think he's trying to be contrary or to gross us out. He's talking about what is, to him, merely an engineering problem. He just doesn't see that an ordinary human being would find that appalling. And he really is in love with the physics and the engineering.

I see echoes of Leuchter in all sorts of odd ways. I run into it among SF fans, who dwell obsessively on the structures behind fantasy constructs. It turns up among people who create fantasy ideas of how economics works (Libertarians, for example), and who are so in love with the mechanical purity of these ideas that they refuse to understand that they don't work in the real world. For a really good example of this tendency, check out Charles Murray's _The Bell Curve_, where everything about our society, including anxieties about race, is rolled into this ridiculous index called "IQ." (I get the sense that Murray enjoys making money while promoting perverse ideas. Strikes me as a genuine scumbag, of course.)

DIANA:
This is a one-time response, dear heart. I go back to silence where you and I are concerned after this response. Sit quietly, I beg you; and just hear me out, sans attitude, if you can.

I mean you no harm. I have no malice toward you. If, when I note in a posting that, for instance, "there are people who appear here whose unconscious directives force them to seek adolescent attention," you must empty your mind of the false belief that I am necessarily referring to you in an oblique way. Truly, there are any number of others who come to my mind long before you pop in ... and that includes myself as an attention-seeking child. Yet even when I am silent, you convince yourself that you see maliciousness in what I post. I tell you again, and I tell you from the deepest well of Honesty to which I have access ... I have no ill will where you're concerned. You are probably, in person, a terrific person to chat with, and I suspect a loyal and determined friend. But when you get on this board, you go looking for trouble. I don't think you even do it consciously. When others have suggested that you might be happier with counseling or some mild medication, suggestions that at least half the time seem to me to have been made out of concern for you and the way you present yourself, you have flown into a virago rage. You are endlessly confrontational and contumelious. You pick annoying nits -- sometimes based on a lack of information of the point in question -- and you get everyone nuts. So they jump you. I chose not to get into that. I want you to be as happy and content as you wish to be; but for me, well, Diana, you're just too high-maintenance. I've got a world of shit to wade through every day, I'm dismayed and angered by a great deal of what goes on everywhere (The Dixie Chicks were again booed at a public gathering, the Country Music Awards, last night), and I simply don't have the additional stamina, interest, or time to play these ultimately soul-crushing verbal games with you. You get ME nuts, and I don't care for that. PLEASE stop reading malice or bear-poking into my replies to others. Go well, Diana; stay softly, live sweetly.

Respectfully, but finally, Harlan Ellison

Regarding photographic evidence of Harlan's sartorial elegance
Is it just me, or does Harlan look like a refugee from a Jack Kirby "Fantastic Four" comic? (All the photo needs is a dialogue bubble with the words, "IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!")

As for my Sheckley query: I guess it's like asking Harlan what he thinks of Robert Silverberg--it would take at least an essay-length post to do the subject justice, and I'm sure he doesn't have the time. I'll just check that NESFA collection out of the library, and let you know what I think. (With my luck, he'll be so spell-bindingly good, I'll feel like an idiot for not picking up on him sooner.)

I still think HE should consider an essay on fashion in the sci-fi/speculative world, using his own estimable memory of his past wardrobe as a starting point. Observations on other luminaries in the field would be great--wasn't Asimov fond of the bolo tie? Didn't Heinlein always wear dark suits? Inquiring minds want to know...

Weekend discovery: Frederick Pohl lives on the same block as my parents. My wife was walking the dog and saw the Gateway sign on their mailbox, and had a nice chat with his daughter, who was working in the yard. Apparently they've been there for years. Who would have thought one of the golden age greats would be living in Palatine, IL?

Brian:

Well, not saying much about Leuchter, except to mention Errol Morris and his wonderful documentary "Mr. Death", about this pathetic soul. I still can't see how he could make such a simple mistake in chemistry, one even I caught the first time around. The image of Leuchter, after the trial where he is discovered to have been an idiot in promoting that rubbish about not finding hydrogen cyanide at Auchswitz, sitting in a cheap rooming house, reminds me of one Matthew Carty, in "Pride In The profession", from "No Doors, No Windows", with both Morris and Ellison showing their characters meeting their crippling denouement in self-created hubris.

On the subject of "What Ellison's Wearing":

"I'm wearing a dark adobe-toned brushed suede jacket, wide collar, Eisenhower length, which I bought in Paris. It cost
me something like three hundred dollars in the late '60s, if I recall..."

There is a small photograph of the parton author adorning the back cover of the Ace Fiction rerelease of "Gentleman Junkie", where I surmise M. Ellison is wearing the same said jacket. (April 1983 release for the book, not the jacket). Good sir, I hope you abandoned the attempt at moustache.

As Stuperduck would say: "No need to thank me, my good man, I was just doing my duty." I'll likely get the same reciprocation Daffy received...

With that, Scott leaves, mentioning not mentioning the chuckle he received at reading the small errors made by those toward my person, pausing to mention; Guys, I hope more attention is paid to your driving than is paid to your reading. Dead ends can be difficult if not perceived correctly.

Scott

Holy God,

The man in the picture looks like David Hasselhoff's stunt double on "Knight Rider."

"KITT, I'm gonna need a turbo boost over that tractor trailer, buddy..."

"MICHAEL. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY CHASIS...."

That photo of HE Not In Leisure Suit looks like Lou Reed...!

Dear Mr Ellison,

A friend of mine suggested I should somehow express my distress to you over this situation. He seems to think it would help. I have no faith in that advise.

I think that might be a bad idea.

He's also suggested, at other times that I do just the opposite when dealing with you. That is, he's advised that I continue to present a cheerful and unperturbed front throughout regardless of how I've felt about how you've treated with me of late.

That was advise I felt I could follow.

I don't think I should be distressed. I don't think I should be effected by what you do or say. I don't think it would be a good idea to let you see that you've hurt me in any way, because I believe that's what you've been trying to do.

I tell myself, and I somewhat believe that it doesn't really matter. Nothing you do, or say or think has anything at all to do with my actual life. I can go out, and get some perspective, and shake it off.

But in the moment, like this one, partly because I'm tired, I know, but partly because it's *you*, I feel like I just can't go another round.

So I go to my friend, who is amazingly wise, and I ask him what I should do. I asked him again, because I didn't like the first answer, and he said I should do what he says. He says to do it well. But he says to do it.

I wish you would stop doing this. I wish you'd communicate with me at some point. Sometimes it distresses me greatly that you won't.

I think I should go outside, and take a walk, and forget this situation. No doubt I will. But my friend's a lot older than I am, and he's wise, and he says he's right, and that I should tell that you you've caused me pain, and tears in these last few days. So I'm saying it. He says not to make more of it all than it is, so I won't. But he says not to make less of it than it is either. So I won't.

I'm not sure that this isn't a really bad idea, I'm not sure that it is. But I am sure that's all I have to say at the moment.

Diana

coming attractions (and there's more than one way to take that!)

Hey, I have no problem with tough criticism. Bring it on. I've had too much lousy criticism on this book -- flaccid, cliched, far-too-personally motivated though masquerading as semi-objectivity. But this is not the place. Post it to me privately.

As for humorless snoot-in-the-airs, I have got a story about a certain one that puts me to shame, which I just heard for the first time this evening from another published writer I was interviewing, but it will have to wait a day or two before it gets posted here; I have to make sure I get all the details straight. . . .

I Married A Smartass!

Worse than marrying a communist, I assure you.

David, and Jim Hess: First, Mr. Ellison has said it perfectly. Scott is often like that, but not to the point where it is cruel baiting. He wants you to know that he has paid you the respect of listening, regarding your opinion enough to purchase the item, but not in any way that would make you feel that respect. Yes, I know, Scotty works in mysterious ways. The man I married has pronounced to the world he wears an ensign of disbelief in the forces that run the world, showing that disdain as often as possible. I happy to say, however, that the outer shell of the husband's self-professed cynicism hides a man who would go through hell for a friend in need or who'd pull down the moon for his children or wife on their whim, and not ask renumeration for the trip or the effort. If he bought your book, David, it's because he respects, if not likes you. However, don't feel any undue umbrage should he criticize it. He would feel himself he wouldn't be doing you any favour by falsely praising it, if the quality of the writing wasn't up to snuff. He'd want you to have an honest opinion, again rising from respect, to help you to be a better writer.

I know it might be making trouble, but Scotty himself would admit to making some hostile comments about "Doomsman", if I'm remembering the title correctly. I haven't read it myself, but Scotty has advised against it.

If you don't mind a bit of advice from one running a cottage industry:

Who cares why they bought it? TAKE THE ROYALTY CHEQUE AND RUN!!!!

Of course, getting Scotty to admit to actually liking you, well, you have a better chance pulling teeth from a rabid and hungry bear's mouth without anesthetic. He's always had that difficulty, at least for as long as I've known him.

Don't worry about him reading your posts. He won't take offense, just read it in bemusement and then give it the shrug and half-smile he does. He's much harder on himself in viewing his errors toward a friend than on most slights a friend would do to him (within limits).

Now, if all will excuse, I'll finish my camomile then chase a bit of sleep. 100 teapots now sit in bisque, and I'm done in.

Good Night and Love to all, Melissa

Thanks
Damn flattering reply, Harlan. But to be frank, _asking_ the Leuchter question was tough work. You see, the one time I met you, at a comics con here in Philly, I was tempted to ask you that very same question. I didn't, because it occurred to me that, if a total stranger walked up to you and asked that question, it'd seem like that stranger was looking for a strange kind of argument. That's why I said that the answer didn't affect your story at all-- to show that this was just curiosity about a minor point, and was definitely not a referendum on anything.

Also, it was in a line to get books signed, and I didn't want to hog your attention with so many other people waiting.

But man, it's nice to know I've _impressed_ you, even if it is just about questions.

JIM HESS: Hold the bus! as The Banana Splits used to say. Nobody so far has said they didn't like the Prokosch. Scotty was being his inimitable sillyself, asking if Loftus and I would refund his purchase prices should he not fancy the books he'd bought via David's and my recommendations. HE WASN'T SERIOUS. (Though I have a whisker of suspicion that that humorless, snoot-in-the-air Loftus thought he was. Hah, that for you, Davey!)

BRIAN SIANO: My silence on your queries is not my usual "I do not choose to run" empassing cape-swirl. The problem with your questions, kiddo, is that they're really VERY GOOD questions, virtually every one of them. The problem with your questions is that you can ask them in a TV Guide log-line, and it takes me four hours to answer them properly. Which task daunts me. I'm asked by someone what I think of Sheckley, who has been a close friend for almost fifty years ... with whom I've collaborated on one of my favorite stories ... who has lived with me ... for whom I've hustled and agented when times were tough for him ... and then the Webderdude asks me to recommend where he should start in the Sheckley canon. Then you ask me if I don't think my writing has metamorphosed in recent years, a poser that is a TERRIFIC question, but requires damn near an essay to explicate properly. Yeah, I do think it has, but that's what I want it to do. I am a writing artifact in process, and probably will be till I go down for the last nap. And I'd have to go into the influence of Borges on stories of recent vintage like "The Toad Prince, or, Sex-Queen of the Martian Pleasure Domes" or "Never Send to Know For Whom the Lettuce Wilts" as opposed to "Objects of Desire in the Mirror are Closer Than They Appear" which each have a radically different agenda. So you see, apart from an easy lay-up such as saying that I hadn't heard of Fred A. Leuchter's fascinating career before I wrote "Mefisto in Onyx," and only came to the most cursory knowledge of him even then because he had created the electric chair in Alabama that I selected as the venue for my story (because most states have outlawed the hot squat), most of your questions are simple to ask, but longwinded to answer. So I sigh and say, "Later for you, Siano." But it's not because they aren't interesting queries. As I said: it's because they ARE smart queries.

Wearily, Harlan

Harlan and Susan:

The books arrived today. Thanks for the dedication, Harlan. It was a nice and unexpected surprise. Wait til my wife sees it (she just walked through the door as I write this).Hope the package arrived A-OK today.

Alejandro

Someone DIDN'T like "The Seven Who Fled"?

Well. There it is. The sign humanity is circling the cosmic drain.

Anyway, just popped to mention to those interested that the latest (or thereabouts) issue of "The Bloomsbury Review" has comment by Harlan (remember him? The guy this space is supposed to be about?) about the late, great Tom Auer.

Pick up a copy. Or two.

Added a link to the picture of Harlan NOT in a leisure suit. Enterprising clickers can probably find it on this page. Also fixed Loftus's carriage-return laden post.

Scott asked:

> What's the process for refunds if these books don't pass muster?

I hope you're joking. You can't seriously be asking me for a refund on a book I didn't sell you. How many other authors do you expect to pay you back for taking a chance on their book and not liking the result?

Besides, I don't think I ever urged you or anyone else to read my book. I have only been informing people that it's available IF they're interested in the topic (or feel like giving me a little support), and taking some pride (justifiable, I would hope) whenever public approbation is voiced.

I don't claim that mine is a great book, or even a necessary one. My main reason for wanting people to buy it is to establish some basis for my trying to assure prospective publishers that my future work -- none of which is likely to be on the same subject, or anywhere near it -- also has the potential to sell.
I buy books by friends and people I've met that I never get around to reading, because I want to support them. I would have hoped you purchased mine in something of the same spirit, if you aren't all that interested in the subject matter.

Use my powers for good? Never! (or, contemplation of a naked HE)
Ah, Mr. Ellison, good to know I can still get a rise out of ya, even from this far away. I admire your detective work: the edition of Ellison Wonderland was published in Britain and it was sent to me as a Christmas gift by a friend who lives in Hull. I had no idea it was rare (though I'm sure Barney has one).

You're never going to let me live down that "See! He ain't gonna sit with us!" are you? You do know why I said that, though, don't you? It's because when I cut the line at the autograph table and asked if you still planned to sit with us, you cussed me soundly and told me I had a short attention span. I was merely noting to the group the irony of your subsequent decision NOT TO SIT WITH US, after you'd insulted my ancestry AND my ability to retain a thought. It was not merely "glass is half empty-itis," it was the exercise of my rather overactive capacity for pointing out irony. I think said urge lies on the English teacher gene, right between a compulsive loathing of people who spell "definitely" wrong and a violent hatred of people who write things like "it's a secret between him and I."

So the leisure suit comment, perhaps, was my unconscious rearing its ugly little noggin saying, "See? He didn't sit with us AND he had a leisure suit on at some point in his life! Ha." But I stand corrected on this particular issue of a habit-assery, as I believe it is spelled for those who are bored and thus obsessed with such minutiae.

Your adoring fan,
P.A. Berman

PS--I'm e-mailing Rick a scan of the photo for everyone's scrutiny and viewing pleasure. Oooh, aaah! Anything for youse guys.

Free Nude Ellison with This Box!

I'll apologize quickly for both the second post, and the crude entendre within the title.

Actually, M. Ellison, I have two of the three editions of "Sex Gang", and well, while the writing isn't your best, it's better than other writing I've experienced. Permit me to not mention the three Harlequin and two "Nurse in Love" romances I've endured so I might be able to criticize their horrendously awful writing, sans being accused of being a Bob Dole-style hypocrite.

So's not to force Barney into toil I can do for myself, I'll happily search both my own collection, and then online to find out more about the series mentioned. No, I don't mind the idea of good writers creating smut. Hell, I'm one who wouldn't mind there being quality plot development and interesting characters displayed amongst the sounds of ripping lingerie, the repeating click of closing handcuffs and the violent smack of sweaty bodies colliding...

Perot didn't have much imagination when he spoke of a giant sucking sound.

Rick: Out of curiosity, the wife asked if the new board will entail paying membership, so that we can decide on whether or not to invest. Personally, I'm one who always wondered if you shouldn't have solicited some funds from us sooner, for both financial and emotional duress we've probably created for you at various points in time.

Like what I'm probably creating now.

Scott

P.S. SCOTT: An easy one to answer. No, I never wrote any real pornography. Closest thing to it was the creation of Nightstand Books (for which Silverberg, Larry Block, and other now-famous writers wrote their erotica) back in 1961. I plotted out hundreds of the books for Scott Meredith clients of the time, and though they were "scandalous" at the time -- the hidebound stick-up-the-ass '50s in which Playboy and Rogue were causes celebres -- they are so primly post-Victorian in their similes and metaphors as to be embarrassingly trashlike when read today.

I assembled a collection of "bawdy" stories I'd written for the various men's magazines in the mid-'50s for Nightstand under the title SEX GANG and the pseudonym Paul Merchant, but the stories are so awful, and the writing so juvenile, and the "sex" so mild, well, if you can even FIND a copy of one of the three (3) printings it went through, any copy will cost you an arm and a leg. I mean it. The prices I see for that stupid 50 cent paperback on e.bay make my head swim. Hundreds and thousands of bucks--not a cent of which I get--for something that is little better than bottom filler for a birdcage. But apart from that, I never wrote any of the hard stuff. Most of this story is known to longtime readers of the Ellison canon, but if you want more specifics, ask Barney Dannelke to post the info. -- he

"Headline:

NOTED AUTHOR HARLAN ELLISON ARRESTED FOR MOONING FANS...

One witness, Mrs Talliah Myers, blinded by the light, says she will sue Ellison for damages. In a related incident, her husband Mr David Myers named Mr Ellison in a divorce suit, claiming Ellison's baring of his ass (and etcetera) are responsible for the alienation of Mrs Myers affections..."

Dear Mr Ellison,

Have mercy.


"She"

SCOTT: Better than a money-back guarantee on THE SEVEN WHO FLED: If you don't find it exemplary, a book you'll read and reread from this day forward, tell me how much you want to "make you whole," and I'll send you a check posthaste, including the postage it takes for you to mail it to me. You can even tack on a buck or two, thus giving you a modest profit for your time invested. I can always use an extra copy. Seriously. --he

You all need help. Warm milk all around.

and then two seconds later I realised my post was a bit impolite, question being directed straight to HE, after all. Excuse me.
I love the part where he drives through the rain, and he smells the orchids.

about mephisto in onyx
hi Brian,
I don't believe there is any intentional irony in the ending. I see where is the oddness you mean, but I don't feel the nasty joke on him, not because of any kind of internal logic within the plot but because there was nothing in the tone and treatment of the character that suggested he would be subject to it. The narrative isn't steering the reader in that direction.

Naiki

Ellison Ensuited
If someone wants to e-mail me a scan of the photo in question or otherwise get it into my possession (I do have a scanner), I'll be happy to post it. Don't have time to do much else as I have been busy working on the Sooper Seekrit Bulletin Board 2.0 (more details forthcoming soon), but I can at least do dat...

Harlan, now that the mystery of the Alleged Leisure Suit of Doom is resolved, would you mind if I re-asked a question I posted a while back?

It was about a reference in your story _Mefisto in Onyx_, to an electric chair built by the Fred A. Leuchter corporation. I'd mentioned that, when I saw the reference, it popped for me because I was pretty aware of Leuchter's prominence among Holocaust Revisionists. My question was whether you knew about Leuchter's second claim to fame when you wrote that story. (It makes no difference for the story, or for yourself, if you did or didn't. I only knew about him because I'd done a few columns about those creeps for _The Humanist_. I'm just curious.)

And while I'm at it, I'll ask a question that reveals a big area of my own ignorance. There's something about the ending of _Mefisto_ that loses me. I know what happens, of course. But it's what the character _learns_ that escapes me. It's implied that he's going to change those aspects of himself that are holding him back, i.e., getting out of his own way, but his victory comes through, well, switching from black to white-- sort of the ultimate "passing." I hate admitting this, but I get the sense there's a really nasty joke in that ending that I'm not getting. I confess my ignorance, and humbly ask for enlightenment.

Harlan: Thanks for causing coffee to shoot out of my nose. Maybe the 'what's Harlan Ellison wearing in the headshot' test could replace the Rorschach as a psychological test -- especially as it now causes me to ask the question 'What type of leather jacket is that on the back of the 1983 Ace paperback _Gentleman Junkie and Other Stories of the Hung-up Generation_?' The land of trading cards awaits...

Scott: The Masters of Comic Book Art would probably be the more satisfying volume for someone who doesn't read comic books that much. Nice sections on Richard Corben, Druillet and others, and a really great section on Barry Windsor-Smith that focuses more on his Pre-Raphaelite-influenced prints than his early Conan work. On the other hand, the Golden Age... volume was meant to supply useable 'plates' for removal and mounting, meaning the backs of the reproductions are mostly blank.

Now if I can only get that copy of _The Great Canadian Comic Books_ away from my hometown library, where the text languishes in storage...

Damn, I wish someone would do an archive series of Nelvana or Freelance so that I could actually read the damn things without travelling to a rare books facility.

Cheers, Jon

Given how the typical science fiction convention exhibits some of the lowest presentations of fashion acumen, probably only rivaled by what you might see at an competitive chess open, I think this one definitely deserves a fuller treatment in the next book of essays.

Sleepless nights indeed, perhaps wrapped in a satin jalaba, while the wife snoozes happily in the lastest flannel offering from Nick and Nora...

Nope, I'm not even gonna TOUCH this one. (Well, except to suggest that Rick post the offending photo in the gallery section, ASAP.)

Harlan, any thoughts on Robert Sheckley you'd like to share? It's embarrassing to admit, but I've never read much of his work beyond the odd short story or two. NESFA just published a collection of his novels that I'd like to check out, but if you have any other suggestions for the Sheckley neophyte, that would be terrific. He's often included in the same camp as Douglas Adams, Kurt Vonnegut and William Tenn, but is that truly accurate? Or is that typical know-nothing critical blather?

Jim (who still owns a auburn-colored Members Only jacket)

Humour Is Always in Fashion, Or:

Shaving with Occam's Razor Is Likely to Result in Nicks...

M. Ellison:

Did have a bit of a chuckle regarding the Sysiphian effort to discern what the fashionable writer was (is, will be) wearing to impress upon the reader of the necessity to be trendy, but, als, sir you've been bested by the manic efforts by Bern in things jocular. Must admit, Xan brought a good laugh to myself and Mel over his exploits in MiniPutt land (here's hoping the magistrate is a frustrated short-holer himself, turning to the law as career when he found out he wasn't good enough to make the Professional Miniature Golf Association (Yep, it does exist: http://www.thepmga.com).

Jon: Know what? I have neither of the books you've mentioned, but a search has given me a bit of a look at one of the tomes, an Abebooks search has listed a few at good prices. If I buy, I'll let you know what I think.

M. Ellison & David Loftus: Have received "The Seven Who Fled", and have gotten to "Watching Sex" (that came out sounding weird. I prefer participation to watching sex, but I'm digressing and the humour might be too dry...). What's the process for refunds if these books don't pass muster?

Of course, you're talking to a guy who's bought and liked Farmer's "The Image of the Beast".

Brings me to a question, good patron author, prompted by your mentioning of full frontal nudity. Have you ever, as writers like Robert Silverberg, Barry Malzberg, or Andrew J. Offutt have, written pornography under psuedonym? Many did to help pay bills during times of financial struggle, and was wondering if you'd tried same.

If you had, any titles I might look for?

I'm not naked under this raincoat, leers Scott

P.A. BERMAN and JON STOVER:

The "mystery" (such as it was) of the mythical "leisure suit" is solved. With some amateur vest-pocket psychoanalysis thrown in for good measure. Herewith.

When Ms. Berman made her original post about the alleged leisure suit I was alleged to be wearing in the alleged author photo of the alleged SF Book Club hardcover edition of ELLISON WONDERLAND, I knew without a smidge of a doubt that such a thing could not possibly be, as I have never never never owned one of those hideous polyester, double-waffleknit, marching moron suits.

But there WAS something clangorous and out of synch in the post, and I couldn't put my finger on it till this morning. Then...the ah-ha epiphany!(Granting, in front, that ALL of this is moot and inconsequential to the submolecular level of silliness.)

There WAS NO Science Fiction Book Club hardcover edition of ELLISON WONDERLAND. Not the SF Book Club begun by Doubleday fifty years ago, at any rate. ELLISON WONDERLAND had been a paperback original from the long-defunct Paperback Library, reprinted by several different paperback publishers over the years; but no American hardcover had ever been done, SFBC or otherwise. So what the hell was Berman (and later Stover) looking at? Clearly, it existed, because each of them was holding the book in hand when they wrote their comments. But I KNEW there was no SFBC edition! Quelle surprise!

The only time ELLISON WONDERLAND had been done in any kind of hardcover edition was as one of the four titles in the programme undertaken by Millington in the U.K. decades and decades ago. But not even they were ever reprised by the SFBC here in the States, so what the hell...

Ah ha! For a short time, there was a >BRITISH< SF Book Club. Thin little volumes with tacky one-color covers. and THEY had done a reprint of the Millington. So what PA had scored was one of the rare, little-seen UK SFBC editions. Now it began to make some sense to me. How obscure, how far long ago.

It only took me a half hour to locate my copy of the book in the chronological shelving of my work (that fills two rooms). And when I took it down, I saw the photo PA had used to slur me so viciously. To break my heart and hold me up to derision by my bon vivant readers and peers. And, as usual in the universe I rule so charmingly, so benificently, I was right. That ain't no leisure suit I've got on, in the photo. Not even close. In fact, I'm not even wearing a suit. Ah ha!

The UK SFBC edition was published in 1979. The photo looks to have been taken sometime in the late '60s/early 1970s. It's a head shot, and all you can see is my head, my abundant hair, my shoulders, and a bit of my gesticulating hand. The collar of what I'm wearing is turned up, and I've got on a pair of aviator-style tint-lensed glasses. What I'm WEARING, however, is what concerns us here and, since I know those particular items of clothing extra well from memory, I will herewith straighten out them Webderfolks as be smarmissmy disuspectin' my habitashry (to quote Pogo). Habeas Dashuary, your 'torney would call it.

The shirt was a dark blue, long-sleeved, cotton in a "western" style, which accounts for the white stitching. It is open at the throat. Over it, I am wearing a sleeveless pullover v-neck sweater, figural in white and blue, made in Ireland. I believe it is cashmere, but I could be wrong about that. And over both of those, I'm wearing a dark adobe-toned brushed suede jacket, wide collar, Eisenhower length, which I bought in Paris. It cost
me something like three hundred dollars in the late '60s, if I recall. (Ironically, I gave that jacket to my good friend, the writer, Norman spinrad, some years ago. Norman is now living in Paris, so the jacket has gone full circle.) It was a beautiful piece of clothing, and looked as good when I gave it to Norman as it did the day I bought it.

Now. The interesting thing about this photo -- use the "little grey cells" as Hercule Poirot put it -- is that ALL one can see is a head shot and shoulders, and there is absolutely no way of telling if that younger Ellison is wearing what I've described, or a "leisure suit," as PA surmised, or a dickey and kilt. (But fer damn shure it could never POSSIBLY look like a safari suit, Stover.) So, safari suit aside, I can see where Berman might leap to the cursory opinion that it was a leisure suit. But the suit species is not what is at issue here, is it? (Ah, now we come to the subtext.)(Deep and swift and murky run the underground rivers of PA Berman's nethermind.)

Remember the "See, I told you he wouldn't sit with us," remark at the I-Con, PA? That which assumed without substantive or substantiating evidence? That which self-fulfilled your anxiety and supported a "glass is half-empty" view of the universe? Here it is again, so clouded over and unconscious you may well not perceive it as such, even when it's pointed out to you. It is praising with faint damns. And it is so subtle, but so wise a piece of psychological Fifth Columnism, that it punches a button and requires me to defend against it. Very little vanity festers in a man on the cusp of seventy, dear PA, but having once been a clothes horse, and having taken (as I still do) enormous pride in being "well turned out," the mere suggestion that I would be caught dead in something as tacky and culturally clownish (even today) as a leisure suit, pushes a button so cleverly hidden that not until this morning did I recognize how adept you are at this ploy. And, mark me, I'm not even remotely suggesting you knew what you were doing. You did it Jekyll-Hyde instinctively. And, obviously, it worked. you got me. I have spent an hour defending not only that which neeeds no defense, but explaining and hammering at it. How tragic am I?

You're good, PA. I'll give you that. Now, if you can get your conscious mind to understand what your unconscious is doing, and turn this vast power to Good rather than Evil, well, you'll have harnessed a superior force for the betterment of all humankind.

Respectfully, yet sitting here naked, Harlan

Matrix rehashed...er... Reloaded
I was very good. I let MI COMPADRE who is unfamiliar with the genre point out to ME the "MINORITY REPORT" derivative. And he only saw the movie.

(Ah, what WON'T I do for something that passes as luv?)

He was ALMOST on to me when I answered the what do people in power want question along with the dialogue

To all Frank-ophiles

Noam Chomsky's new CD, "The New War on Terrorism," is available from www.alternativetentacles.com

Maybe we can't know Frank, but we can know what moves him...

Susan:

"QUESTION: Forrester. Do you want your books signed to you or to you and your wife. Please let me know via this message board."

Susan, if you and HimsElf (the both of you, please) would sign said books to Joyce, my wife the doctor, die-hard baseball fan and keeper of scorebooks Dr. J., my better half, my significant other, my soulmate, the one around whom my reality coalesces, educator of children (including me), saver of stray dogs (again, including me)… okay, okay, I’ll stop.

Susan, if you and Harlan would please sign & date the books
“To Joyce (the “Lady of Destiny”), on behalf of ... Happy Anniversary” I would be eternally grateful.

Thank you for asking.

Forrester

PAB: I'm tempted to say "safari suit", but looking at the photo again, it also wouldn't look out of place if Harlan were appearing with Jon Pertwee's Doctor Who in some until-now undiscovered episode of that series.

Scott: Your bit about other sf art books caused me to pull out _Masters of Comic Book Art_ and _The Golden Age of Comic Books: 1937-1945_ for a perusal. They don't make 'em like they used to -- and I include the superhero named the Green Giant in that assessment.

Cheers, Jon

A Day in the Life...

Chuck - I'm honored you found something of value in my post - feel free to purloin any of it you desire. I'd been content to simply lurk (well, content is probably not the most accurate descriptor, but we'll go with it), but Bruce's insistence on invoking a "higher power" as the ultimate and only well-spring of creative inspiration compelled me to unlurk for the duration of a post. I had fully intended to fade back into lurkdom (I know my posts, my "voice", works best as that of "loyal opposition" - the fact that this board is not the hot-bed of contention that other was, as well as the stated guides to associate the board with things Ellisonian, has meant there is simply no need for me to post very much at all.), but your kind words (as well as Scott's), compelled me to return again to thank you both for being so gracious.

Scott - Thank you as well. I took your advice, went with the 1 Wood and managed to hook the ball into a small child waiting in line for ice-cream. I ended up ruining the club while fending off the enraged father-type guy (who seemed to think my falling down, laughing hysterically at the size of the lump on the youngster's noggin was an affront of some sort. I tried to tell them that the kids don't get nearly as upset at a percieved "hurt" if you laugh at it with them instead of clucking and looking concerned, but he seemed intent on murder.... Some people just can't accept good parenting advice when they get it, can they?). Anyway, I escaped after an Errol Flynn-like duel across half of the parking lot. (Let me just say, knowing how to leap onto a soft-top convertable from an SUV made all the difference. He didn't, and despite a slower general running speed, I bounced off a structural member while he dropped into the rear passenger-side seat. As he untangled himself from the denim-like material and the somewhat amorous advances of a little fuzzy dog, I made my escape in a pimped-out 1995 Saturn SL1...) I didn't beat Eleven, but seeing the guy's face as I activated the air shocks and bounced on past him to the liquid strains of Mr. Mister album, _Welcome to the Real World_ was worth it. (I'll say watching the little mop humping his leg for all it was worth put a smile on my face, too)

While they charged me for the damaged club, and I can't show my face in that county any more (the charges were less that a class C felony, so the police won't actively pursue me around the state - I just have to avoid general traffic stops and my recent weekend visits to the local drunk-tank - do you know if Betty Ford has a bulk rate plan?), I have to say: all in all, a good time was had by most.

Take care all, I may mostly lurk, but I'll be around if you ever need me - all you have to do is whistle - you know how to whistle, don't you? I thought so...

Bern

P.S. Cindy - if you need a shoulder - my email is above.

Just a quick note to say that I finally happened to glance at Cindy's e-mail address and it's the funniest thing ever. She's the best person in the world.

Stacks of Wax
To Rick, or whoever is responsible for that fantastic trip:

What a nice little wander through old laels, before companies and conglomerates began to take music and make it into an erzatz sound-alike competiton. I really enjoyed going through the garden, and any others take a boo to see what's about.

I don't have many of those labels, but a lot of envy for the collector. Do have a Mar-keys single, bought at a rather exorbiant price, but most of my 45's are old Buddha, Tamlas, Parlophones and Brunswicks (got every original Who single on that label).

Looks like I'll be hunting...

Ellison at Leisure: I'll have to see the back cover of Wonderland, so see what the froofarah is about. I just remember the patron author on the back cover of "Alone Against Tomorrow", in the leather jacket, strutting a pose right out of the Sears catalogue.

Yeah? You call that a knife? Bring it on...

Scott

Shit!

Last time I drink and post-- broke the one per day rule AND made an ass of myself.

I fine myself two days.

Sorry y'all,won't happen again.

:)
Cindy

Respectfully, Mr. Ellison, what do you call it? It looks like a denim suit with really prominent white stitching and an enormous collar. I guess that the key component of a leisure suit is polyester, so if that snazzy outfit was made from all-natural fibers, than I stand corrected (please don't cut me!).

But adding in the fluffy hair...you look much more dashing now.

PAB

And *That's* What It's All About


Dear Mr Ellison,

Regarding:

"Get someone who actually understands the proper nomenclature for {habadashery}..."

Maybe *you* should get someone who actually knows how to spell "haberdashery" correctly? Just a suggestion.

Sincerely,

Diana

(haberdashery.
hab·er·dash·er·y ( P ) Pronunciation Key (hbr-dsh-r)
n. pl. hab·er·dash·er·ies
A haberdasher's shop.
The goods and wares sold by a haberdasher.


Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.)

Well then and I got my answer.

I'm sorry-- shouldn't have pressed. At times that which I want outweighs my good sense.

A thousand pardons and I'll mention it no more.

It's been a long day. An old friend who struggled against the demons of alcoholism lost. He hit a wall-- literally and now he's gone, leaving a young wife and two little girls.

At times life is such a dream-- these things come as jolt.

BERMAN:

I have NEVER EVER owned a leisure suit. Sheeet, woman, Nixon's thugs wore those goddam ugly uniforms. There are a lot of slurs and calumny I'll tolerate, but owning a leisure suit ain't one of them. Get someone who actually understands the proper nomenclature for habadashery (as opposed to those who just call things whatever comes to mind, a process we call "talking out of your ass,") and have them look at that photo, and let them tell you what I'm actually wearing, which is NOT a fuckin' leisure suit!

Cheerfully (see I'm smiling...see, you can catch the reflection of it in this kris I'm holding at your throat), Harlan.

So, saw Matrix Reloaded tonight. While I think it's a strong second chapter, I just had to note something very interesting to me (and maybe just me). Pay attention to the significance of names. Besides the obvious ones like Keymaster (and I amused myself by imagining he was a descendant of a rogue Mac Keychain program), look at names like Merovingian and Seraph. It's just a nice continuation of the name & number jokes from the first movie. Hell, anyone who names a charactyer Merovingian - and knows exactly why they named him that - is reaching higher than a lot of screenwriters.

That said, I'm going to miss Gloria Foster as the Oracle. She had a wonderful charm that stole scenes like crazy (huh - never knew she trained at Goodman).

Regards,
Joseph

P.S. The Smash & Go Hulk arrived today, and it is about the most amusing toy I've ever had. Go Hulk go!

TONY, old friend:

They got here today in mint condition. Muchas gracias, asai.

Harlan

Harlan,

Received the $11 today for the 3 Justice League toys. UPS tracking says the package was left on your porch today, so if you didn't receive it, please let me know.

Bests,

Tony

USA
Harlan,
I know of your affinity for this board, while the other board (we'll call it the Easau board) is not your pick for clear and obvious reasons.

You know that Rick will do as you ask because of the great respect and affection he has for you.

Would you please ask him to open the door to the Easau board so that I might escape this cramped bottle?

It is a lovely pavillion and the pace is relaxing and comfortable... but I pine for the frenetic activity of the black and yellow-- more acutely than my words can convey. I want to be contrary on occasion. I'd like to tell them that Jessica Lynch's story does not seem as cut and dried as some would have it. I want to argue on occasion and put my two centavos out there for the others to argue against. They illuminate other paths of thought and I do miss it all.

I know I ask for the moon-- but if the black and yellow came back for business- your pavillion would slow down once more to a Mississippi Delta pace-- y'all could float down the river with the quiet erudite comments of the nobility-- leaving the poolroom brawls on the other side of the wall where they will disturb you only when you've a yen for something abrasive or disconcerting.


What say-- do an old friend a favor? After all it IS the original home of your flyin' blue monkeys.


STILL and all-- not MY will but thine be done.
:)

yer pal,
Cindy

Ben,

Don't forget my mention of the Holmes story, The Adventure of the Yellow Face. Holmes thought he was on to a juicy case of blackmail. It turned out to be something completely innocent. The truth was revealed just seconds before Holmes would have utterly embarrassed himself in front of his client. Holmes took credit for solving the case, collected his fee and later told Watson if it ever seemed he was getting a little too full of himself, that Watson should remind him of this case. I think there were one or two other stories where Holmes lost out one way or another, but I don't remember them off the top of my head.

And there was one story where Holmes kicked the bad guy's ass all over a pub.

Chuck

I got a copy of ELLISON WONDERLAND, the hardcover Science Fiction Book Club edition, and the picture of Ellison on the dust jacket is way too hep and cool for me. Whoa, Harlan sporting a fluffy 70s 'do and a leisure suit! Far out. Once I reread it, maybe I'll have some incisive Ellison-related commentary. I will say that, during my illness, I reread DEATHBIRD STORIES and it was a great, if perverse, comfort.

OK, Frank, so you're not telling. I'll get over it. ::sniff::

As for MATRIX: RELOADED-- I really enjoyed it. I very badly needed to get my mind off real life for about 2.5 hours on Saturday night, and it was the perfect antidote to navel-gazing. My favorite characters were the Merovingian and Persephone. That was easily the best part of the movie. The Architect made my head hurt-- do you think the Wachowskis told him to speak as quickly as the average auctioneer? Whew. Anyway, it hit the spot for me.

ROB,

Thank you for updating me on the number of losses Holmes has suffered in his stories. (next to none). It's made me ponder just how exciting or dramatic you could make a character who...well...wins all the time. Take away the fame clouding Sherlock and his classic bearings, and you'd have the story dynamics of a G.I. JOE cartoon.

I really should finish the job I started five years ago and complete THE HOUND OF THE BASKERVILLES, if only to feel more accomplished and self-congratulatory.

BRIAN,

THE MATRIX RELOADED was technically incredible, there's no way one could deny that. But...not much else. I was just kind of sitting there throughout the whole movie, and by the end I felt...drained. Spiritually depleted. Dreary and empty all at once. I kept praying one of the characters would bump into a wall or something while wearing those stupid black shades. Still, Agent Smith was a nice stand-out. He has a strange, sardonic naughtiness that distinguishes him from all the other mannequins in the movie...not to mention his new power was quite terrifying.

My real, straight, untainted feelings about THE MATRIX RELOADED can be seen in my (slightly altered) version of a conversation from the film:

"Not everyone believes what you believe."

"My beliefs do not require that they do."

"...uh...okay...so...you believe that your belief has to believe what you believe?"

"No, I mean that no one else has to believe in what I believe unless they choose to believe in my beliefs."

"...what were we just talking about?"

"Shit, beats me, dude."

David Loftus - I am truly sorry to have missed such a chance! I was planning, really, on asking if anyone active on the board lived in the cities I went through on my trip out to Montana - San Fran, Portland, Seattle, Couer d'Alene, Missoula...and suddenly the movers came and stole away my computer. You know how it goes: "I've got three weeks! No need to hurry." Then, "I've got three days! Time enough." Then, "Three hours, more than enough time to make a post."

Yep. Ms. Procrastinator of the Year. ;) I'll more than likely be back through, though, and I promise to give a heads up.

--Zoë Rose

Harlan:

I've been away the past two weeks and just now saw your May 14 post. Glad to hear you received the (2) McSweeney's. If I can ever again be of service…

Best,
Ray

Winnie Le Pooh


Dear Mr Ellison,

If you're still feeling light hearted, and glad to be alive (I hope, you are) or even if you're not but would like to again, you might enjoy reading a little of Benjamin Hoff's, The Tao of Pooh. You can download it (for free) or read it on site, at the following url:

http://spoerlein.iwarp.com/pooh1.html .

Or (which I think would be better for the author, and nicer for you, since you'd then have the book to hold) you can readily buy it somewhere. You can probably get it as a book-on-tape too (if you had the recording you could listen to it while leaving your hands free to play with your Hulk dolly. I mean "action figure").

Sincerely,

Diana

Harlan:

The package is on its way. Priority First Class, sent to your P.O. Box. Should be there by Wednesday, no later than Thursday. You only need to reimburse postage, that's all. Don't worry about the rest. The CD is more than enough.

Alejandro

Harlan:

The package is on its way. Priority First Class, sent to your P.O. Box. Should be there by Wednesday, no later than Thursday. You only need to reimburse postage, that's all. Don't worry about the rest. The CD is more than enough.

Alejandro

When you are passing through. . . .
Zoë Rose --

The next time you come through town with the intention of dropping into Powell's to look for Ellisons, do drop me an advance notice by email; I live 10 blocks from Powell's and would enjoy sharing a latte (the much beloved Ann Hughes coffee shop that used to occupy the NW corner of the first floor of Powell's closed up after several decades, but World Cup Coffee, whose home base is one block from my home, will open an undoubtedly more spiffy outfit in the same spot within the month) or a beer or something up the street, with another Webderlander.

That goes for fer allayuz.

Sitting at the "Chuck and Bill"

I'm having the expresso...Hey, "Rococo Roadkill Surprise"!

XanBern: Love reading your posts, even though they often make my self-indulgent chicken scratches seem extremely spurious. Couldn't respond yesterday, having not enough caffeine in the sytem to phrase response (Definite three cuppa, myself wanting to be awake.). Makes a great precis on the relationship between creator and created, one giving the writer much deserved respect both for the effort and design of the work, and the cursing chore of subjecting himself to the myriad frustrating challenges to that work created by readers and critics.

As for myself, the question of the relationship between creator is created is summed up in witnessing the process engaged by the wife as she slices off a brick of clay, then pounding it in a small violence against the wheel. The rhythm of her foot prompting spin; the hands wetted to slowly press the clay into desired shape; the pressure extended being just enough to bend, not force, the mud into what she desires it to be. Even more, the time taken by Mel to hone her craft leaves her often shaping items more with intutition than with conscious thought, the instinct of design within the practiced hand negating the need for the mind to direct the action.

I don't believe the writer or the potter are all that different, other than at the issue of the item created. Obviously, try holding tea in the manuscript for a novella, or writing "War and Peace" on the side of a vase in glaze. But, within the idea of process, the transference of thought, effort and trained discipline to create, I don't see much difference at all.

I've got to say that your post puts to mind the work of Borges, and his deconstructions of the fantastic, especially "The Library of Babel" or "Tlön, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius", amongst so much of his work. Funny, but had you been reading "Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote" lately?

BTW, a bit of advice from a erstwhile duffer, vis à vis the 11th. Go to the 1 Wood, and blast it. The force required to shatter the blades of the mill would assure that you lay up close, and then an easy two.

Sorry Xan, but there must be a home for the spurious, too...

Scott

Response to KathyM
Thanks for your note, KathyM.

By the way, since your looking, I really recommend Harlan's Deathbird Stories. Check out the award-winning "On the Downhill Side" if you want to see an interesting psychological and metaphoric take on the afterlife. It's a rapturously beautiful story--style, character, content--everything!

Help me out folks!!! Whenever my parents bring me a new toy, I play with it for about three minutes and then it doesn't interest me anymore. I have a huge hamper of old toys and I totally DESPISE them. I am always bothering, begging, and subtling manipulating my parents to buy me new ones. I can't help it; the longing and anticipation for a new toy makes me crazy. Every second I don't have one, intense desire increase exponentially. I'm destroying myself with this desperate as well as my relationship with my parents. Maybe some of you experts out there can give me some advise on "how to play nicely".

"The Too-Cool Hulk Smash Toy"
That really is an impressive effect (I don't know how much faith I have in the theatrical release of "The Hulk;" I hope it's stupendous, but alas, I fear the worst; from what I've seen, Microsoft is the star of that show). I was also real pleased with the new line of Outer Limits action figures released through TV Land. I have the Ebonite Interrogator, which occupies a high place of honor on my living room mantle. Next, I'd love to find likenesses from "The Soldier," and "Demon With A Glass Hand."

Guys, you have an excellent message board. I appreciate you letting me post here.

Thnak you to Brian
A thank you to Brian for providing me details of a typical American supermarket and script reading advice which helped obtain the following result at:

http://www.digitalfilmmakinginstitute.org/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=43

Will be seeing the man in Philly in a few months.

BTW - Brian, don't you suspect the woman may be reading this board?

FAQ

It's a dreary Sunday afternoon here in Philly, topped off by the fact that a female person I was going to have a nice coffee/dinner/whatever thing with hasn't gotten back to me. So I'm wondering; should I stay in, and clean up the basement, or go into town, find a decent bookstore, and browse for fun?

Re Richard Dreyfuss: Yes, Alex, Dreyfuss has done Shakespeare. Around the time he'd done _The Goodbye Girl_, Dryefuss talked about how he'd always wanted to play Cassius in _Julius Caesar_. He did do it in NYC in the late 1970s. (He also did a monologue as Hamlet on _Saturday Night Live_ as well, back in the days when they'd _do_ such things.)

To Dave and Gary: You have some seriously brain-damaged and antisocial friends. Re-evaluate your social lives.

Okay, now for _The Matrix Reloaded_. This is a difficult one to evaluate. I enjoyed the film overall, and I'm hoping that the next film manages to flesh out all the plot points and potentials that this one's set up. But there are two BIG problems that the Wachowskis have to face.

The first is, well, the problem of doing a story about virtual worlds. The original's revelation about the Matrix was a nice mind-blower. But the second movie intimates that the characters aren't acting out of free will, that even the existence of the non-Matrix world is open to question, and that there's an even deeper level of "reality" as yet unexamined. Fine. But if the characters are confronted with such detailed mindfucks that they _never_ know what's real and what isn't, then the story sort of evaporates; there can be no real resolution, and any heroics depicted are pretty much for naught.

(By the way, while so much is made of the philosophical underpinnings of these films, I think it's mainly bullshit. I don't think one has to read a fraud like Baudrillard to understand a difference between "real" and simulacra; he's just embroidering on a theme that goes back to Plato and the cave. But then again, there are probably millions of viewers who _haven't_ encountered these ideas before, so to a younger audience, it's "original.")

The second problem's in the visual effects. They look great-- there's a truck collison that you'll never forget, and the famous "burly drawl" with a hundred Hugo Weavings is _hilarious_. But at this stage in the game, the Wachowskis (and George Lucas) have pretty much demonstrated that there is no demarcation between an animated film and a live-action one. Anything that can be imagined can be made to look "real." And while this frees up filmmakers immensely, it feels as though an element of magic has been taken away. It's a bit like the first Harry Potter movie, where every bit of magic was rendered into literal, concrete images; unlike _The Adventures of Baron Munchausen_, where techniques as simple as cardboard cutouts were used to create scenes of beauty and wonder.

it's all right to shake, to fight, to feel
So at first I'm trying to figure out why Chris L is recommending SPELLBOUND. Sure it's good, but it's no NOTORIOUS or VERTIGO or THE BIRDS.

Oops. Different SPELLBOUND.

Thanks for the heads-up, Chris. I'll have to check it out. Ebert had good things to say about it, too.

And you're right to chastise George Lucas. Episode II was the stupidest thing I've ever sat through. Jesus Christ. I have to stop now. The memories are washing over me again, like waves of sewage.

HARLAN: 'Twas I who hipped the board to the Hulk-Tank thingy. Makes me glad to be indirectly responsible for some of your glee. Of course, I first heard of its masturbatory leanings from Peter David's web column, so I suppose the circle done come 'round.

On Richard Dreyfuss--a great actor, who has lately made some very good performances in otherwise forgettable flicks--but me, I've always wanted to see him play an out-and-out villain. Sort of in the same way we've seen affable characters such as John Lithgow and Dustin Hoffman make star turns as irrevocably bad guys (I'm talking about films like RICOCHET or BILLY BATHGATE, not BUCKAROO BANZAI or HOOK)--and I think Mr. Dreyfuss could pull off some deliciously evil parts, if given the chance.
(And yes, playing Alexander Haig is a step towards evil--but I want to see him as a main villain.)

Hmm ... looking at the Internet Movie Database, he's done some VERY interesting parts I've never seen: Yoni Netanyahu in an Entebbe telemovie? Yossarian in a CATCH-22 TV pilot? There WEAS a CATCH-22 television series pilot?!?

Hell, I would have been interested in seeing him in some Shakespeare: A young Drefuss as Bottom, perhaps, or as a scheming Don John?
(Better than Keanu ...)

RICK: Sorry about the scutwork which postings like the one directly below this force upon you.
Have we lately shown our appreciation? If not, consider it flamboyantly flashed your way like a Mardi Gras co-ed promised beads ...

Enjoy...

Quotes:
Please, if you ever see me getting beaten up by the police, please put your video camera down and help me.
--Bobcat Goldthwait
Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
--Dave Barrey
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
--Oscar Wilde
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
-- George Carlin
There is nothing quite so good as a burial at sea. It is simple, tidy, and not very incriminating.
-- Alfred Hitchcock
When choosing between two evils, I always like to pick the one I've never tried before.
-- Mae West
You can observe a lot by just watching.
--Yogi Berra
I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.
-- Steven Wright
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam. I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.
-- Woody Allen
I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
-- Lily Tomlin

Questions:
Who was Matthew Birchinger?
What 1969 movie became the first and only X-rated production to win the Academy Award for Best Picture. (Its rating has since been changed to R.)
What was movie detective Dirty Harry's badge number?
What is the most filmed story of all time?
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime-time television were...?
The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after...?
A group of unicorns is called a...?
A group of of goldfinches is called a...?
What was the first spin-off In TV history? What show was it spun-off from?
A Stupid Quote:
"Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, "Thank God, I'm still alive." But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again."
- Barbara Boxer, Senator
Useless & Odd Facts:
In the 1985 Boise, Idaho mayoral election, there were four write-in votes for Mr. Potato Head.
In Minnesota it's illegal to mock skunks.

A Quiz Or Two:
Hollywood Blacklist Movie Quiz
Many members of the film industry were blacklisted because of the 1950s House Un-American Activities Committee (HUAC) hearings. Can you answer these questions about movie folk who were blacklisted (though not part of the illustrious 'Hollywood Ten')?

1) Orson Bean was blacklisted in the 1950s but continued to work, even into the 21st century. Who did he play in 'Being John Malkovich' (1999)?
Captain Mertin
Mr. Hiroshi
father at the puppet show
Dr. Lester

2) John Berry was blacklisted after making the documentary 'The Hollywood Ten' about the ten industry members who spent time in jail rather than name names before the HUAC. He later went on to direct a movie that was part of a baseball-film series. What movie did he direct?
Major League II
The Scout
The Bad News Bears Go to Japan
Stealing Home

3) Phil Brown, one of the founders of the Actors' Laboratory, was blacklisted in 1952. Still, he remained active in the industry (in part because of his relocation to England). Which of the following did he NOT work in?
Jaws
The Pink Panther Strikes Again
Superman
Star Wars

4) Jack Gilford was blacklisted with his wife in the 50s, but went on to earn an Oscar nomination for his work in 'Save the Tiger' (1973). What other, more widely known, movie did he have a part in?
E.T.
A.I. Artificial Intelligence
Cocoon
Alien

5) Michael Gordon, before being blacklisted, directed Jose Ferrer in a film based on a classic novel. This same novel was later made into a film starring Steve Martin in Ferrer's role. What movie did Gordon direct?
Richelieu
Cyrano de Bergerac
Le Grande Nez
Roxanne

6) Waldo Salt achieved some success in writing prior to being blacklisted, but his true achievements came after the 50s when he wrote 'Midnight Cowboy' (1969), 'Serpico' (1973), 'The Day of the Locust' (1975) and 'Coming Home' (1978). Which of these successful films did NOT earn him an Oscar nod?
Coming Home
The Day of the Locust
Midnight Cowboy
Serpico

7) Though he continued to work sporadically after the blacklist by moving to England and using pseudonyms, Howard Koch's more notable achievements came prior to the 50s. Which of these classic films did he write?
Gone with the Wind
Some Like It Hot
Casablanca
All About Eve

8) Peter Brocco was among those blacklisted. He had always been a very prolific actor, but some of his better projects, like Kubrick's 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' (1975) came after the blacklist. What character did Brocco play in 'Cuckoo's Nest'?
Randle P. McMurphy
Billy Bibbit
Colonel Matterson
Chief Bromden

9) Screenwriter Walter Bernstein was blacklisted shortly after the start of his career, but it hurt him little in the long run. Which movie starring Henry Fonda did Bernstein write, which was later redone as a live television program with Richard Dreyfuss in Fonda's role?
The War of the Worlds
The Apartment
Ulee's Gold
Fail Safe

10) Marc Lawrence has worked in well over 100 films, though seldom in starring roles. He was blacklisted because he admitted his political leanings and named names, motivating a move to Europe so as to sustain his career. Lawrence returned to Hollywood after the demise of the blacklist, though, and has since worked on many huge films. Who of the following has NOT starred in a film Lawrence worked in?
Tim Roth
George Clooney
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Tom Cruise

What Was The Line? Movie Quiz
In this quiz you guess which line is spoken by whom. You will be given the movie, character in question, and four quotations from which to select.

1) These quotations are all from "Airplane!", released in 1980. The particular quote I'm looking for was spoken by Lloyd Bridges, who played Steve McCroskey. What'd he say?
"Surely you can?t be serious."
"I am serious...and don?t call me Shirley."
"Flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes."
"Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue."

2) The next movie is "American Beauty", released in 1999. The character is Carolyn Burnham, played by Annette Bening. What'd she say?
"You don't get to tell me what to do...ever...again."
"You love him, you wanna have, like, ten thousand of his babies."
"Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it."
"Honey, don't be weird!"

3) "Blazing Saddles" is our next movie, released in 1974. We're looking for the quote from the late, great Madeline Kahn, who played Lili von Shtupp, the Teutonic Titwillow. What'd she say?
?You've got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know... morons.?
?Is that a ten-gallon hat, or are you just enjoying the show??
?My mind is aglow with whirling, transient nodes of thought careening through a cosmic vapor of invention!?
?Now send a wire to the main office and tell them that I said...OW!?

4) On to a more serious movie, namely "Braveheart", released in 1995. The character we're looking for this time is Hamish, played by Brendan Gleeson. What'd he say?
?Every man dies. Not every man truly lives.?
?Well...we didn?t get all dressed up for nothin?.?
?Him? That can't be William Wallace. I'm prettier than this man!?
?The trouble with Scotland is that it's full of Scots!?

5) "Clue" (1985) is our next movie in question. The character is Wadsworth, played by Tim Curry. What'd he say?
?A plant? I thought men like you were usually called a fruit.?
?Yes, I did it. I killed Yvette. I hated her so... much... it... it... the... it... the... flames... flames... flames... on the side of my face... breathing... breathless... heaving breaths... ?
?Frankly, Scarlett, I don't give a damn.?
?If I was the killer, I would kill you next. I said IF! IF!?

6) Our next question is from the 1964 comedy classic "Dr. Strangelove or How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb". The character is Colonel "Bat" Guano, played by Keenan Wynn. What'd he say?
?Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones.?
?Mr. President, I?m not saying we wouldn?t get our hair mussed. But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops. Uh, depending on the breaks.?
?You wanna know what I think? I think you?re some kind of deviated prevert. I think that General Ripper found out about your preversion, and that you were organizing some kind of mutiny of preverts.?
?Gentlemen, you can?t fight in here! This is a War Room!?

7) Back to the present, and 1999's "Election". The character is Tracey Flick, played by Reese Witherspoon. What'd she say?
?Getting suspended is like getting a paid vacation. I don't know why teachers think it's punishment.?
?I also like bananas.?
?Say that everyday you had an apple. An apple, an apple and more apples. You probably thought that apples were pretty good. Then one day there was an orange. Now do you want an apple or do you want an orange? That's democracy.?
?It's like my mom always says, ?The weak are always trying to sabatoge the strong.??

8) "Fargo" (1996) is our next movie. Steve Buscemi's Carl Showalter is our subject. What'd he say?
?Ah, hon, ya got Arby's all over me.?
?But you?re saying...what?re you saying??
?We split the car.?
?I'm not gonna debate you, Jerry. I?m not going to sit here and debate.?

9) Indiana Jones' first adventure, "Raiders Of The Lost Ark" (1981) is next on our list, and the character is Sallah, played by John Rhys-Davies. What'd he say?
?What a fitting end to your life's pursuits. You're about to become a permanent addition to this archaeological find. Who knows? In a thousand years, even you may be worth something.?
?You Americans, you're all the same. Always overdressing for the wrong occassions.?
?Asps. Very dangerous. You go first.?
?You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do!?

10) 1994 brought "Forrest Gump" and "Pulp Fiction", but we're going to look at "The Shawshank Redemption". Our character is Brooks Hatlen, played by James Whitmore. What'd he say?
?Rehabilitated? Now let me see. You know, I don't have any idea what that means.?
?Put your trust in the Lord.?
?Maybe I should rob the FoodWay so they'll send me home. I could shoot the manager while I'm at it, kind of like a bonus.?
?On the outside, I was an honest man, straight as an arrow. I had to come to prison to be a crook.?

11) "The Silence Of The Lambs" was released in 1991. Jame Gumb was a character played by Ted Levine. What'd he say?
?It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.?
?Lambs. The lambs were screaming.?
?First principles, Clarice. Read Marcus Aurelius. Of each particular thing ask: what is it in itself? What is its nature? What does he do, this man you seek??
?Look, I am not just some turn-key, Miss Starling.?

12) The greatest mockumentary ever produced, 1984's "This Is Spinal Tap", is our next movie. Christopher Guest plays lead guitarist Nigel Tufnel. What'd he say?
?Certainly, in the topsy-turvy world of heavy rock, having a good solid piece of wood in your hand is often useful.?
?As long as there's, you know, sex and drugs, I can do without the rock and roll.?
?I think that the problem may have been that there was a Stonehenge monument on the stage that was in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.?
?I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really.?
13) The groundbreaking live action/animated feature "Who Framed Roger Rabbit", from 1988, is our next selection. Jessica Rabbit, voiced by Kathleen Turner, is our selected character. What'd she say?
?I ambushed him, hit him in the head with a frying pan and put him in the trunk ... so he wouldn't get hurt.?
?Is that a rabbit in your pocket or are you just happy to see me??
?Here's to the pencil pushers. May they all get lead poisoning.?
?You see, I didn't know where your office was. So I asked the newsboy. He didn't know. So I asked the fireman, green grocerier, the butcher the baker, they didn't know. But the liquor store guy. He knew.?

14) "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory", from 1971, is our next movie. Violet Beauregarde, the constant gum chewer played by Denise Nickerson, is our subject. What'd she say?
?Spitting's a nasty habit.?
?A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.?
?If she's a lady, then I'm a Vermicious Knid!?
?I've just decided to switch our Friday schedule to Monday, which means that the test we take each Friday on what we learned during the week will now take place on Monday before we've learned it. But since today is Tuesday, it doesn't matter in the slightest"

15) Last one. Ready? From "Young Frankenstein", released in 1974. Our subject is Gene Hackman, who made a brief cameo as the blind man. What'd he say?
"Could be worse...could be raining."
"Yes! Say it! He was my BOYFRIEND!"
"A riot is an ugly thing...undt, I tink it is about time zat ve had one!"
"Wait! Come back! I was gonna make espresso!"

How sad is that I strike my one-post limitation to agree with Chris L. WINGED MIGRATION is a work of beauty and grace, that gives you a fantastic feel for one of the most amazing events in animal history.

Come on down to the Chuck and Bill for our BBQ'd possum....

Bill,

Your posting made my day. I'll see your gallstones and raise you a kidney stone.

Hey, it's not as gross as Rob's crunchy underwear.

Bern,

That was quite a posting you made. Well reasoned. I may have to purloin some of what you wrote down for an argument some time. If I had a hat, it would be doffed in your general direction.

Scott,

A genuine laugh over your posting. You also made my day.


And so did the image of Harlan Ellison and Richard Dreyfuss having a ball with the tank-humping Hulk. The Missus should get all this on video.

And now, I must exit cyberspace. I'm having an old friend for dinner.

That didn't quite come out right, did it?

Chuck

Your friendly neighborhood film grump comes to you today with two glowing recommendations and nary a complaint in sight.

For those of you lucky enough to be near a theater playing it, run, don't walk to see WINGED MIGRATION. Better yet, take your car so you won't work up such a sweat by the time you get there. This film is by the makers of the great Microcosmos and does for birds what that film did for insects. Those of you looking for a plot will be sorely disappointed - the film "merely" shows you a host of sights no human being could ever expect to see, perhaps has no right to see. You get to see birds of all stripes from all climes during their migrations. Some make it, some don't. While the film is mostly narrative-free, there is a sequence in this film - and I do not wish to spoil it for you - that I must count as perhaps the single greatest HORROR FILM sequence in movie history. You'll know it when you see it. And see it you must. at the theater. It won't be the same at home, even if you got yourself one of them nifty wide-screen dealy majiggers.

You also need to see SPELLBOUND. I mention this second not because it is inferior. It is probably a superior film to Winged Migration. However, you could, if you are truly given to sloth, wait for the DVD and not miss too much. Spellbound is the story of several 7th and 8th graders in pursuit of the national spelling bee. Sound boring? I suppose you think the millionth itertation of mismatched buddy cops chasing neo-terrorists through the city streets counts as exciting, huh? You probably went opening night to see I-Spy, didn't you?

In any case, the film is as gripping, tense and emotionally involving as any I have seen in the last few years. Sometimes you just can't beat the real thing. And yeah, I'm talking to you, George Lucas.

Ohhhhh, Jeezus...

I actually have to eat shit AND vegetables in the same morning?

As you can see, Scott, the question was cleared up in my last exchange with Earl...making your follow-up a bit extraneous.

On the other hand, HARLAN...

You're absolutely RIGHT! First off, I generally know better than to be an asshole about an illustrator - particularly one whose work I really don't know. Sometimes one's cortisol levels get out of control and he simply talks too much. Secondly, the repro I glanced at was a poor one. What comes through, however, tells me his control was quite decent. Very nice flow in the lines. I practically need a magnifying glass but in close, careful examination it's quite evocative. I'd be happy to look at decent repros of Ruth's work.

I'd love to be able to challenge you by arguing, "what makes you think I was being sarcastic?" But my fine deductive powers inform me you wouldn't have bought that. No, I just went off the deep end in my babbling. I respect artists because I'm one myself. EVEN when I don't care for a specific illustrator I generally don't get smart-assed about it. It's FAR more unforgivable when I don't even know his work. Actually, I'm unfamiliar with many of those pulp illustrators from the 40's.

Yeah, that was pretty bad. I'll be eating my musky shorts straight from the hamper.

Please forgive the second post, but reading M. Ellison's comments about the Hulk Smash Toy and Richard Dreyfuss formed the most perfect visual image of the noted writer and an Academy Award winning thespian (Although I always thought Burton should've won for "Equus") sitting on kitchen linoleum, fighting over whose turn it was to get a chance to play...

Goddam, that's funny.

Scott, who wants to know where the hell his Ebonite and Zanti Misfits are...

Steve Dooner, I greatly enjoyed your post about the Christian Humanists and the Deists, and also the remark about "twelve-step Theology." Unlike you, I'm not an athiest, however, I've always been uncomfortable with various aspects of all religions. All too often, much of religion seeks to push us back into the muck rather than encouraging expansion of the mind, the soul (for want of a better term), man's abilities. Why this is so often the case is not only tragic but also baffling. If you posit that a high power could have created the cosmos, shouldn't you have a respectful awe for such a mysterious and unknowable power and a yet a delight in pushing the boundaries of knowledge toward attempting to know it or in someway understand it? Why should your mind and imagination contract instead of expand?

I don't believe much in divinely inspired artists as much as I believe in happy coincidences where genes, dexterity, ability and environment all collide to form an individual capable of communicating vision to others in song, story or picture.

Well, now I see how easy it is to digress from the topic of Harlan Ellison's work.

Thanks to Mr. Ellison and all others who've invited me to the neighborhood. And thanks also to those who mentioned SHATTERDAY and ANGRY CANDY. I wasn't certain which books to look for after having finished SLIPPAGE and this helps very much. A visit this afternoon to the bookstore is in order.

ROB: You may take Rod Ruth's name in vain, if you wish, you insensate phlegmwad of johnny-come-latelyism, but when he was doing b&w illustrations for the Ziff-Davis pulps in the '50s, he was one of my favorites. His work was a cross between Edd Cartier of Astounding and Unknown, and Bob Powell of the comics. Sharply delin eated, clever, and very muscular artwork. I would LOVE to buy an original Rod Ruth illustration or two for the house, if any were available. He may not have been significant enough for a second edition of that Encyclopedia, but I sure was nuts about his artwork. So there, smartypants.

Oh, and despite my being too busy to go scrolling back to locate the identities of the two or three of you who made mention of the Hulk Smash Tank toy, I truly wish to thank you thank you thank you. I bought one (only $8.99) at Toys'R'Us and it is so nifty that when, last night, Richard Dreyfuss and his wife Janelle came over to go out for dinner at Mogo's Mongolian Barbeque, and he saw it, he ooo'd and ahhhh'd, and we had to take out about ten minutes on the kitchen linoleum to play with it. So thank you again, to youse who hipped me to it. It is my new, current, favorite plaything ... next to Susan ... who, in all fairness, is not nearly as psychopathic as the tank-smasher. Nor nearly as green. She has her severe limitations, but I've grown fond of her. Especially when she extends her eyestalks and drips sweet ichor into my Kix.

All best otherwise, yr. pal, Harlan

Scads and Scads of Irrelevant Nonsense...

Huh? What? Yes, I'm referring to this post.

Rob: Listen to Earl, he's exactly correct. I've got three editions, including the recent rerelease (bought under the pretext that I was getting an updated, revised edition. Damn you, John Clute and Peter Nicholls. DAMN YOU TO HELL!!!). There are absolutely no illustrations in The Encyclopedia of SF.

On topic, and related to M. Ellison: I might suggest Frank M. Robinson's "Science Fiction of the 20th Century: An Illustrated History". It's concise, where Aldiss' history tended to wander, and it's gots nice purty pichurs, most of these pulp cover art. Even more, you get some good Ellison coverage, with quite a number of pages writing up Ellison's contributions to the SF genre.

Jon: Your post reminded me of the spreads that OMNI used to do, featuring fantastic art related to novels or stories within the genre. I went back to check the stacks, and found another editorial contribution Robinson made displaying those wonderful pulp covers and interior art that I strive to collect (no Virgil Findlay originals yet, but, still hoping to find one at a price that doesn't resemble the GDP of a developing nation); "Art of Imagination: 20th Century Visions of Science Fiction, Horror, and Fantasy". Marvelously thick (700+ pages), and spanning the history of SF artwork. Might I also suggest the Spectrum series of books, edited by Cathie and Arnie Fenner? Fantastic cover and interior art, quite eye catching.

Chuck and Bill: Gods, that doesn't come out sounding good; Come down to The Botulism Shack, and experience the taste sensation we call "The Chuck and Bill". Sorry.

I can only tell the two of you that I'm reading what you have to say out of interest and concern, hoping that the fact that I'm listening helps the two of you to handle what seems to be somewhat shitty times. It does get better, mon amis, and when you get your due, I'm hoping the fates give you the restitution you've earned in spades.

Remember, Rob, listen to your elders. And, eat your vegetables. There's a good boy.

Yes, Earl, I hear ya chucklin'...

Mel's busy, won't be in for a few days. Hopes all's well to all.

Love to those who care;
Fuck you to those who don't

Scott

Arts and Crafts
Bruce Miller,

Sorry, Bruce, but your argument doesn't fly.

You postulate: "Ok, he is talking about the SUBCONSCIOUS mind which normal people do not consider to be part of the 'me'." I have to say that I boldly disagree with that statement. Most people DO think of the subconscious as part of themselves, if they think of it at all. In fact, I would further suggest that the only people who reject that notion are those trying to prove the existence of a "higher power". In fact your whole argument is geared toward that very proposition. Like, "but I still say that some other force is sending messages to the artist." Not that I have a problem with your trying to prove it, I just don't think you've gotten there, yet.

You also state, "But most authors, artists, rock stars, etc. seem to have NO IDEA of the profound insights and allusions that their art gives forth." This is an interesting notion, but in the end, since that effect can be completely explained by ordinary experience, we are forced to reject the "God Concept" (you may want to check your keyboard by-the-by, it seems to drop "o"s and "e"s every so often) as THE explanation for the observed events. (Occam's razor and all....)

How can it be explained, you ask? Let me show you. (I know, you didn't ask, but the Socratic dialog form helps me transition...)

There are two parts to the "Art" equation. You have acknowledged one side, but you have failed to recognize the other at all - this is the weakness in your argument. "Art" has two parts - the craftsman and the audience. The craftsman uses his (or her) skill, talent, and ability to arrange the raw material of their craft into a shape that conveys, for them, some message or statement of their worldview. That's it. That's the sum total of the effort. Their contribution to the "conversation", such as it is, is done.

Now we present that crafted piece to the audience. They experience the "Art" through the filter of their own experience, knowledge and cognitive ability - a worldview that may or may not overlap with that of the craftsman. They may "get " the message the craftsman intended, they may miss it entirely (usually, it's somewhere in between those extremes...) It is in the areas that the worldviews DO NOT overlap that we find the explanation of your observation that "most authors, artists, rock stars, etc. seem to have NO IDEA of the profound insights and allusions that their art gives forth." The insights and allusions that you drew were because of your experience, your worldview - not theirs.

Let's use a quick example: Imagine I'm a writer who has not read some classic of literature like, Don Quixote. I have not read and experienced the wonders of Sancho Panza or the beautiful Dulcinea or the Don himself - I have no idea at all of their significance in the world of literature at all.

I write a passible story about frustration and useless effort set on a miniature golf course. (Why? Because I'm a lousy miniature golfer and the 11th hole frustrates the hell outta me - I can never get it past that damn swinging windmill.) I pour into this story all of my heartache and frustration, as the father of the story becomes increasingly erratic and eventually gives up completely, throwing his putter into the deepest pool of dyed blue water the park has - but not before inspiring his son to continue to try to putt that damn ball through the little path under the windmill.

You, as the well-read literati you are, come up to me on a signing line and ask me how I ever managed to fit the spectacular allusions to Don Quixote into that wonderful little story - especially fixating on the Windmill as a the archetypical image of technology as monster. I look at you blankly, (remember after all, I've never read the novel...) and say that the windmill is just a windmill, and I put it in there because I can never putt my way through it. You smile sadly, and assume that since I did not recognize the allusion, I must have been inspired by a "higher power" - and since I had no time to be enlightened by you on a signing line I am also a rude, shallow dope.

You are wrong to make that assumption. The "missed" allusions are because your worldview and mine do not overlap directly. Their is no need at all to invoke a "higher power". And we can even safely ignore the allusions the author tried to draw, that you, the audience member missed. (Say a passing reference to Dachau, to put an Ellison spin on the argument.) It's not because you are an ignorant heathen that god has not deigned to enlighten - it's cause you hated the subject of World War Two and avoided every reference to it like the plague.

No. You argument does not hold water, and I disagree with it completely.

Bern

Just a quick hello to all - haven't had a chance to catch up as all of my "household goods" have been deposited somewhere unknown to me in Great Falls. I've finally arrived at my destination (that being, of course, Great Falls) and I'm learning the truthfulness to the name of "Big Sky Country". It's grand, it's desolate, I feel adventurous and tiny and scared.

But I'm here. Once I get my own computer (bless friends with computers who let me use them) back, I hope to post more often. My contribution that has to do with HE? I was able to stop by Powell's Book Store in Portland, the largest bookstore in the (world? country?). I saw 17 different HE books - ones I'd never even heard the titles of before. VERY cool. Uncool thing - military didn't give any advanced pay, credit card fairly maxed with moving/travel expenses - could not BUY said unheard-of-titles. I must go back!

--Zoë Rose

Re: various comments on divine inspiration
Mr. Miller, I too am an atheist, but I think you should read a little bit more about humanism, which is not an exclusively atheistical concept. There were Christian humanists in the Renaissance who believed that the human capacity to create was enormous. Read Gargantua and Pantagruel, and you'll see that Rabelais knew humanity could be far more than what it had taught itself to be. Look at Michelangelo's signature on the Pieta, and you know that he intended the whole world to know that he created this artwork as an expression of his own ego.

I think too that the deists in the Enlightenment would have disagreed with your view that poor humanity could only aspire to artisanship not art. Benjamin Franklin's greatness as an artist is unquestioned, and he wrote, "God helps those who help themselves" because he knew that people were always looking for strength outside of themselves and accomplishing nothing while doing it. The above quote is excellent advice from someone who invented stoves, bifocals, lighning rods, glass harmonicas, swim fins, writing desks, and flexible catheters, without divine inspiration.

You envision an enfeebled, fallen humanity always in need of some magical force to augment its own pitiful strength. This is "twelve step" program theology. Many artists without a "higher power" have found that they do not need to put up an antenna to some distant and disinterested god. What they need to do is get down to work.

Mr Ellison,

"There are always a few (like Diana) (everyone knows that's what you meant) in every group whose basic agenda is to be heard, to gain attention, to be noticed..." "...Sometimes it is done with cruder tactics, and the metronome just keeps on reprising its pendulum arcs of wasted time"

I remember you announcing indirectly to the air at one point that I didn't exist in your Universe.


I haven't decreed that you don't exist in my Universe, though, so I can address you directly. I prefer this method. It leaves a lot less room for doubt and confusion than the one where someone talks to the air and announces stuff, and tells people who DO exist that they aren't there anymore.

I exist. I think you should know this.

Sincerely,

Diana



Hathor,

You're going to get virtual cooties if you talk to me. I thought I should warn you.

(a startled jump) DIANA! Woow!(blink blink. Slap to forehead)
And all this time I thought I was standing next to a plant. Damn spectacles.
Don't let the Board pariah thing bother you. I CLEARED a room once by showing how Jon Edwards "does it". (I STILL say Kreskin did it better)Hopefully the Board Masters will destroy the room while everyone regroups and writes about me "behind my back". (Gee, it IS like actual socializing, isn't it?)

The television reflection has a bad echo. I mean, I was smoking one of those O-fay orange flavored Camels, and this ghost is pointing out that the filter color reminded him of the "Pre Cowboy" Marlboros that used to camoflauge lipstick. Geez! Observing all those people while in limbo for decades, and you can't come up with a better icebreaker? (MEN in Black?!? Pssh!)

The idea of presenting oneself with useless minutae and generalities as "proof" of being a non-threating entity doesn't wash. Yes, your death was senseless. Then again, MOST ARE! Very few people get the gift of dying at right time, and now I missed my bus. Thanks, loads, O dead hippie!!! Now get out of my face.

Hi everyone,

Thanks for all the comments and taking me so seriously. I am a really serious person, by the way. Thanks also to Harlan for the response--don't feel obligated to share the royalties on your new book that I helped inspire.

I know Harlan is different because of all the "real life" anecdotes and stories he adds to his collections. But most authors, artists, rock stars, etc. seem to have NO IDEA of the profound insights and allusions that their art gives forth. How can it be that the inspirer does not even understand the inspiration?

I have the utmost respect for the years of hard work it takes to become a master artisan, but I still say that some other force is sending messages to the artist.

Even an athiest can accept what I'm saying. Let's look at Freud's idea of athiesm--Man created G-d in his own image through primitive infantile desires for a father figure. Ok, he is talking about the SUBCONSCIOUS mind which normal people do not consider to be part of the "me". So let's say it like this: While Sting is playing around on his guitar he is swept up in divine revelation and his subconscious brain writes the song. Sting says, "Yeah, I wrote it," but test him on the literary profundity of his lyrics and see if he passes.

Just because someone believes in G-d, doesn't mean he's stupid (although I admit there is ample evidence for it). It's just a matter of where you draw the line between self and other. I just think it's a little arrogant to draw it at 100% "ME".

It's the idea of "other" that freaks out the athiest. When Jung came up with the collective subconscious idea, Freud disowned him. Why? because it smelled to much of the all-hated and all-feared "G-d Conc-pt". He, like most athiests, just wanted to grab all the credit for himself. If I recall, Mike Tyson always gave G-d the credit every time he won a fight, so come-on Unka Harley. . .step into the Light.

Weird thing that I just had to share...

So I'm flipping channels before bed, and I come upon a Spanish broadcast of an old Bruce Willis flick. I've just figured out it's "Blind Date," mostly becuase it has Kim Basinger to annoy me, when I notice something really weird:

This blind date is at a H. R. Giger exhibit.

Now that just threw me for a loop for a second. Even in a Blake Edwards movie, who the hell brings a blind date to a Giger exhibit? Strange...

Regards,
Joseph

"Bill,

I hope your situation improves soon. Frankly, I don't know how you hold up, but I think you got real stones. Hang in there."

Chuck,

Thanks, really. I feel like Stallone at the end of the first Rocky sometimes, standing and beaten and shouting out incoherent babble, only Rocky got famous.

Actually, there's small instances of hope that comes through here and there. For instance, I'm at the end of my first semester back in college, which I didn't want to return to in the first place. I've had some of the best professors of my life this past semester. I've made friends, something I don't do easily, which has boosted my confidence in myself to the highest it's ever been. I received loads of good words about writing I've done in one of my classes, by those who'd be most likely to read my work if they had access to it (unfortunately, it was essays they read and not fiction). And then, Thursday...

My favorite class has been my African American Autobiography class. The professor, a man named Everett Hoagland, is a poet. Was the Poet Laureate for the city of New Bedford from 1994-1998 (or something like that), if friends with Maya Angelou, and has these great lectures. Each class was an emotional experience. I got to read books that I've been meaning to read but hadn't yet, and was introduced to things I may not have read. Well, I go in to get some papers before our final essays are turned in this Monday, and I'm taking my paperwork, making small talk with Professor Hoagland, telling him I really liked the course. Then I see IT. One of my papers. A+, with this written: "You write with smooth, varied sentence structures. Outstanding thinking/writing."

You coulda floored me. This is a man who I've come to respect for his articulation, for the power of his words, and he complimented me in writing. THEN, he tells me I was one of his best students and was always happy when I took part in discussions. That I was excellent at reading and analyzing the work. THEN, he asks me if I'd ever considered becoming a college professor.

I was shocked. Halfway through this semester, I'd begun thinking about it. My self-doubts were letting it be a little dulled. But here's a guy who, until this Thursday meeting, had never really had a personal conversation with me (I'm too shy).

We talked about twenty minutes and he asked to read one of my stories (which I happened to have with me). We talked about Harlan Ellison ("'Repent, Harlequin!' Said the Ticktockman." is one of his favorite anti-establishment stories). I walked out of the classroom with a fool-grin on my face. Saw him today at the bus station, he'd come in to say hi.

Small things like that, and other kindnesses, and stories/books I enjoy, and writing, and movies I enjoy, and the knowledge that movies I enjoy are coming (new INDIANA JONES, EPISODE III, FREDDY VS. JASON), and my daughter's laughter, and friends, and Unca Harlan's Art Deco Dining Pavilion, and the characters Chandler and Ross on FRIENDS, and until the season finale SCRUBS, and sunshine and rain and and and...

Well, you get the idea. Besides, after reading the books in my African American Autobiography class, I know I can overcome. (Cue in music). And if not those books, well, you know how I feel about escaping AM.

Sorry for using this for personal stuff. If I leave anything tomorrow, it'll be Ellison or writing related.

Bill

P.S. Oh, and those stones are gall stones. Are they that noticeable?

The FIRST edition. OK, THAT I can deal with. It's the only one I have. I guess Rod Ruth just wasn't good enough for a second edition.

This was my second and last post for me today.

Rob,

I swear by the spirit of Giorgio Valla (who was not the first encyclopedist but had the best title: ON THINGS TO BE SOUGHT AND THINGS TO BE AVOIDED) that THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF SCIENCE FICTION ed. by John Clute & Peter Nicholls is NOT illustrated. I have the hardcover and trade paperback editions at my feet as I type. (Together, they are too heavy to risk lifting them any higher.)

I assume you are looking at the FIRST edition, which was called THE SCIENCE FICTION ENCYCLOPEDIA and was ed. by Peter Nicholls. That edition has plenty of illustrations. I have the trade paperback edition in front of me as I type. (It’s really portable.)

Earl and Scott,

re: THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF SCIENCE FICTION ed. by John Clute and Peter Nicholls (second edition).

Your descriptive of this book has me scratching my Rogaine bespattered pate: "a true one-volume encyclopedia...(As you indicated, it is much longer and has no illustrations.)"

Maybe we have different ideas of what an illustration is. But leaving out the countless repros from old pulp covers, I see what must be hundreds of illustrations. Here's one by Virgil Finlay. See? Here are two by John Schoenherr. Oh, and look - here's one by Rod Ruth. No book would be complete without a Rod Ruth.

'SPLAIN yourselves.

Mr. Ellison:

Manners and explanation demand a response.

I'm not disparaging your comment about Scotty, I merely thought that another's comments concerning people who come here were a might heavy handed, and hoped that Bruce Miller's comments be seen in a more positive light. The use of the husband's faux pas was more illustration than degredation targeting both concerns than any intent at disrespect toward both he and you, I assure you.

Disagreement doesn't make for bad people; I often feel that proper disagreement makes for better friendships and better people. I enjoy delving into argument (you should see some of the arguments Scotty and I have had over dinners, movies, goverment policies, etc. I know, I'm married to a libertarian, but we all have crosses to bear), so I see nothing but benefits rising out of yours and/or anyone else's debates that occur here, with sizeable benefits going both ways.

If you don't mind my saying, the charm, humour and skill you display in handling such vebal jousting shows how much you like a good fight as well, and, if you don't mind, I'll keep stopping by the market to sample the produce.

Love to all, Melissa

Earl: I wouldn't worry about sounding like a know-it-all -- the nature of the internet, and our limited knowledge of the knowledge of others posting here, tends to make 'teaching your grandmother to suck eggs' moments inevitable for all of us.

Scott: Now you've caused me to reflect on all those wonky science fiction picture books that seemed to flow directly from the UK to the Coles remainder bin during the 1970s and early 1980s, stuff like _Spacewreck_ and _Great Balls of Fire_ and _Mechanismo._ Lots of airbrushed art and, more often than not, Harry Harrison supplying some of the text. Anyone else remember these books? They were weirdly fascinating, not to mention a good source of pictures of boobies for a young post-pubescent lad.

Cheers, Jon

Dear KathyM:

Like any kaffee klatsch, the conversations veer with regularity from the original topic, or its philosophical undertheme, to deeper or shallower streams, depending on what catches the fancy of the participants at that moment. Yet you'll find that, as with a good encounter group, where control of the group -- the power -- emerges from within the circle, that you have as much strength to divert the chat as you wish to employ. There are always a few in every group whose basic agenda is to be heard, to gain attention, to be noticed. Sometimes they do it tres cleverly, entertainingly; and all are enriched. Sometimes it is done with cruder tactics, and the metronome just keeps on reprising its pendulum arcs of wasted time. But this is a venue mostly quick and funny and smart when it needs to be; and if every so often the gestalt gets goofy, well, you have it within your compass to bring the heading around to True North as you see it.

As others have said, we welcome you to the neighborhood.

Respectfully, Harlan Ellison
----------------------------------------------------------

P.S. Melissa, will you kindly stop thinking of my interchange with Scotty as a chastisement!!!?!! I was absolutely bemused by it, had a grand old time yanking his chain with my response, and there is definitely no reason for him to be embarrassed or chagrined. It was a silly question, sure, but a friendly one; and I enjoyed the hell out of that faux-contretemps. You've twice made reference to it, since it happened, and lumped it in with earlier moments when Bag'O'Scott and I disagreed on something or other. But that one was a foofaraw.

No need to respond to this P.S. It is strictly FYI. --he

It Should Be Harlan Ellison
Dear Ms KathyM,

I don't find the topic of Frank Church interesting either. As I'm trying to confine my posts in this forum to ones about and/or to Mr Ellison, I will refrain from going into what I do think about Mr Church, and other things. (I'm capable of expressing myself on Frank Church, and other things, but truly, it's best that I don't) (Those here who would dain to respond to that last comment at all would passionately agree) The limits Mr Wyatt has (futiley) attempted to set for this message board work for me. I find the subject of Harlan Ellison and/or his work endlessly fascinating anyway.

When they go beyond simply making lists of all the books and/or stories and/or essays and or scripts, and/or etceteras of Mr Ellson's that they've read and/or collected, and actually talk about what they think of him and/or his work, I find the posts in here interesting.

I also find Hathor's personally designed action figures interesting. I find Jay Smith's "Jay Smith posting as..." inventions interesting. I find people trying to pretend they're ignoring me when it's obvious that, really, they're hanging on every word I write in here interesting.

But I'm wandering off the topic of Harlan Ellison.

Ellison, who's writing has oft times rendered me breathless and speechless.

Ellison. who is a brilliant and thorny rose...

Ellison, who can change the course of mighty rivers, bend steel with his bare hands, and who disguised as...(you know the rest of the words, sing along with me)

"She"
(aka Diana)

Thanks to everyone who responded to my Encyclopedia questions. I appreciate it.

KathyM, I'm with you on the SLIPPAGE introduction. And I found the introduction to ANGRY CANDY even more moving. I think it's one of Ellison's very best pieces.

I also agree that sometimes this forum can seem like the Frank Church discussion board, but what'reyougonnado.

What's In A Name?

Earl:

Well, you're correct in your perception, as I feel I am in mine. Your noting of the format is accurate, and in keeping with Clute's premise. However, the title classes it as an encyclopedia, and it is a reference book designed to provide information concerning SF. So, it sits in my SF reference section with its 4,000 page brother and other volumes such as Aldiss' "Billion" and "Trillion Year Spree", Disch's "The Dreams Our Stuff is Made of", Panshin, Pohl, ad infinitum. I understand the itch and scratching, but I don't want to undertake the Herculean task of reclassifying, then moving.

Kathy: You don't find the inchanting imp protector of far-left thought, that mystique we call Frank Church interesting? Please, hang about, and experience the wonder for yourself. Somehow we seem to use this site to discuss M. Ellison, each other, politics, toys, tips for buying a bondage rack that is more ergonomic to reduce the chance of back pain, what that growth is on Alex Jay's arm, hell, anything. Trust me, one thing this site rarely is is boring.

Scott

And if we DO soil the carpet.
We will use "Never Mop With Dirty Water Again" Pine-Sol.

Up there with "Take The Scales Off My Elbows Now" Jergens, "My Butt Don't Itch No More" Anusol, and "There Are No Scavenger Birds Round My Lap" Massengil.

(See, if you take the Drew Carey torso, and put on the Barbie as Wonder Woman head and that Caftan from the Beach Set, You get Divine from "Polyester". Yeah, They loved me at the Barbie Museum, too.)

Kathy M,

Don't worry, the occasional Ellison topic does come up, and even the Man HimsElf will make comments and answer a question or two. If we all prove we can play nicely and not soil the carpet, Grand Masta Rick, Esq. will re-open the yellow and black playground and things will settle down a bit here.

Bill,

I hope your situation improves soon. Frankly, I don't know how you hold up, but I think you got real stones. Hang in there.

Frank,

I just knew you had to have some special forces in your background. Say, don't you wear a massive beard and write those "Way of the Warrior" books? That and Chomsky, too. What a combo.

Chuck

Susan, I received the ILLUSTRATED ELLISON/DEMON books yesterday. Mahalo nui loa!

Scott,

Begging your pardon, but these two books…

THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF SCIENCE FICTION ed. by John Clute and Peter Nicholls (second edition)
SCIENCE FICTION: THE ILLUSTRATED ENCYCLOPEDIA by John Clute

…are quite different.

The first is a true one-volume encyclopedia, with over 4,000 alphabetically arranged entries written by dozens of contributors. (As you indicated, it is much longer and has no illustrations.)

The second is not an encyclopedia at all; Clute calls it a “companion.” It is not arranged alphabetically, but rather by chapter (historical context, magazines, authors, titles, films, etc.), and the information in each chapter is presented chronologically. All the text is by Clute. (As you indicated, it is shorter and has many illustrations.)

Sorry if this comes across as pain-in-the ass nitpicking, but this has been itching me all day, and I finally broke down and scratched.

P.S.: I think the Clute book (which I generally like) does shortchange Harlan. He gets half a page in the “major authors” chapter. But the book similarly shortchanges many other writers. Others who got half a page in the “major authors” chapter include Blish, Huxley, Knight, Kornbluth, Kuttner & Moore, Leiber, Orwell, Simak, and Sturgeon. Pretty illustrious company. (The most coverage any writer gets in this chapter, if I’m not mistaken, is 2 pages. Heinlein, for example, got 2 pages.) I think a book this ambitious, attempting to cover 100 years of SF in print and visual media, in the U.S. and abroad, in only 300+ pages is bound to fall short. I think Clute put too much emphasis on some later writers (who may be good but inevitably lack the historical significance of earlier writers) and provided too much detail on some lesser films.

Kathy M.:

Welcome to Webderland. It's a nice place with nice people. This board used to talk about Mr. Ellison's writing and the process of writing more often when the other board was up for pontificating but lately the stuff's been creeping in here (I guess I'm as guilty as the rest). But, if someone comes in here and changes the conversation to works, it's more than welcome. At least for this reader. Which leads me to...

SLIPPAGE has one of my favorite introductions. Like you, I recently had health scares (still am having them, especially since we've lost our low-income state plan and can't afford another plan) and have gone back to that intro a lot. One of my favorite intros, though (not including the ones done for the EDGEWORKS volumes, I LOVED those) came in SHATTERDAY. I won't say I've read enough of Mr. E's books to have all the intros read, but of the ones I've read, SHATTERDAY's is a favorite. SLIPPAGE has the added bonus of talking about Ellison Wonderland (via the earthquake), which, for a guy living in a one-bedroom apartment right now and using it as a two-bedroom, is the model for a Dream House. All those books and toys...sigh...

Oh, who can mention intros without mentioning ANGRY CANDY's? That one was single saddest intro, methinks.

Anyway, Kathy, welcome and please bring in more story-related topics. If the ongoing conversation doesn't hold your interest (it doesn't mine, either), throw out a line and see if someone catches it. No one will bite...

...hard.

Bill

Reality
Frank,

That was quite amusing. Thank you.

Regards,
Joseph

Read on
So "The Reader" liked Harlan's stoy and "The Village Voice" dissed it.

Whatsay we mail The Voice a box of Oreos?

What?

Until next time. . .

Status on THE ILLUSTRATED ELLISON/DEMON orders:

Debbie, Matt, Lynn & Bill, Alejandro, Rich, Dorman & Doug--your packages will go out Monday.

Colleen and Earl's books have already been sent.

QUESTION: Forrester. Do you want your books signed to you or to you and your wife. Please let me know via this message board.

Thanks for your continued support. Next time I offer a few items, to make things fair, I'll give you all advance notice that I'm going to offer the goodies. That should give everyone an equal heads up.

All best--Susan

Enjoyed reading the comments about where Mr. Ellison gets his ideas, especially after reading in SLIPPAGE the examples he gives about the process. I particularly enjoyed the very short "Necro Waiter," since, I, too, was a childhood fan of the Necco Wafers (but I liked those licorice candies!!).

Was anyone else as affected by the intoduction to the book as I was? Having gone through a serious and unexpected illness several years ago, I very much related to what he had to say. Life truly is a lot shorter than we really grasp until we are forced to confront the issue. I very much liked the way Mr. Ellison tied it together with the earthquake. Slippage, indeed.

I've only been viewing this site for a few days, but is there usually more discussion about the stories or essays by Mr. Ellison? So far, there has been an awful lot of (uninteresting) stuff about Frank Church (who cares?). Being a new inductee to the fiction of Mr. Ellison, I'm more interested in discussion of his stories. Yeah, I know I'm a johnny (joanie?)-come-lately, but is this the site for discussion of his work? Or can you refer me to one?

Thanks very much.

Sorry about the double posting, but Chomsky is not some weird, out there wacko. He is highly regarded as an expert on American policy, and is sought after as a public speaker and a best selling writer, who is highly admired in Europe and elsewhere. So no more of this, you nuts. I know American culture has that blindfold over your eyes, but just take a peak; see it aint that scary. Actually it is--but life is about excepting the face of fear. Natch.

Darryl, my only beef with Marc Klass is that he seems to have become a bit of a fanatic about law and justice; to the point where he could easily help to undermine serious democratic concerns. I also wonder if he has had any mental help, after the tragedy with his daughter. The guy appears on all these talk shows and has this glazed beam in his eyes. But I will say the motherfucker who killed his daughter is one of the few people who the state should torture.

Too bad I no longer trust the state. Damn.

-------------

Now the Iraqi pow's are saying to Amnesty International that they are getting tortured by American soldiers. Doesn't surprise me, since it was uncovered years ago that American Gi's tortured Vietnam pow's much worse than the American Pow's were treated, no matter what pow organizations would have one believe. John McCain, I have sympathy--But I believe in spreading it around a bit, like pixie dust.

-------------

PAB, brace yourself!! Ready? Scared yet??

I Frank Church, a highly decorated ex-Green Beret, am living in relative obscurity in the basement of a Turkish coffee house, on the outskirts of a rather seedy part of Istanbul. I exist on rations of rat meat and those wax lips you find in joke shops. I am waiting on the second coming of Jesus, and am in close contact with cloud number 666 via short wave. I have one dusty book shelf with the classics, to wet my soul, and another filled with books of radical politics, that was given to me by a shifty eyed Sultan by the name of Rajje. I read by dim candle flicker and pray for Jesus to rapture into the clouds, before these wax lips give me the runs. I do have access to a computer, but I cannot tell you any more or I would have to kill you--or at least severely give you jock itch.

Feel better, Paula dearheart?

Violins and flowering things in the ladies honor.

I was going to give my best estimation of the "Crazy L'il Thing Called Frank", or big thing, dependent on discloure of his actual size. Rumour has it that Frank was born to English nobility, until an unfortuante accident outside Vulcan, Alberta killed both his parents, leaving him to be raised by Marxist-Leninist Chomsky-chanting sasquatch, but I'll demur.

Something Darryl said hit me.

Over the last two days, we in Ontario have been innundated with a tragic story about one Holly Jones, a ten-year-old who had first gone missing, then her body showed up of the Toronto waterfront. It is frightening for me, and all other parents, to feel that whisper of chance that such an event could befall either your child, Darryl, or one of mine, but it seems even worse to go through such an event in the public eye.

Perhaps it's selfishness, but I guess I feel much more for the Klass' than I ever will for the Smarts. I can't imagine the void Mr. and Mrs. Klass must endure for their lives, to see Polly's life simply ended; no coda, no promise of future possibility, no joy for them to see their young one transform and change over time. To paraphrase a movie line, "When you kill a young person, you kill everything they could've been."

Even more, to sit and watch what is simply a one-in-a-million chance become reality, Elizabeth Smart's story with its Hollywood ending denouement perfectly packaged for media consumption must have been agony for Mr. Klass. He, as John Walsh, the Jones' in Toronto, who knows how many parents who have had to bear the crushing weight of the much more common reality of either finding their child has been killed, or never uncovering what happened to their loved one. Then, try to point out the frightening fact that the Klass' circumstance is by far the most likely outcome in such cases, without sounding bitter or disingenuous before a public that demands the happy ending, as so many would order their Big Mac, well, that's a chore I wouldn't want to take on.

I just felt so badly for him, to know that below the surface he probably was running through the guilt and pain he felt at his own circumstance, and perhaps even some envy for the Smart's good fortune which might've wanted to seep through, but he kept his decorum well.

Love to all, Melissa

This one's for you, Frank
A brief aside regarding God, gods, and "every blade of grass, and the leaf of every tree..."

Something happened recently that I haven't been able to get out of my mind.

A little bit ago, after Elizabeth Smart (the teenager who was missing from Salt Lake City) was found, I was channel surfing, and came to Larry King Live, where one of her relatives (an uncle I think) was being interviewed. He went on and on about how it was a gift from God, how the power of prayer worked, and how his family's faith achieved the wonderful result.

Marc Klaas (Polly Klaas' father, Polly was raped and murdered after her kidnapping from Petaluma, CA) was on the same program. He sat patiently through the previously mentioned interview, then said one of the most stunning things I've heard on Larry King. OK, so I've only watched it two or three times, but still. He said that he was a bit tired of hearing about how prayer worked and faith will work, as if all parents who had lost children to accidents, murder, etc., weren't praying hard enough or their faith wasn't strong enough. He said that he and his family, friends and community prayed every day for Polly, but she wasn't as lucky as Elizabeth, he abductor not quite as monstrous as the killer of his daughter. He was happy that Elizabeth was reunited with her family, but thought that short shrift was given to families of missing children who hadn't been recovered, or were dead.

This episode has stuck in my mind. I thought that what he said was very brave, particularly in the current political climate.

I realize that this is only tenuously connected to the below discussions regarding higher powers, but thougt that it was relevant to the conversation.

My "Frank" special: I notice that there are reputable news reports that the "rescue" of Army private Jessica Lynch was staged.

See the bbc's website at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/programmes/correspondent/3028585.stm

I particularly love that the rescuing military personnel were shooting blanks, ostensibly for benefit of the video cameras filming the event.

One more nail in the coffin of government trust...

Never thought I'd see the day when Frank could reduce this board to a mass of fawning, groveling supplicants.

Frank, you possess power here you never had before. At this point I think you could get 'em to do whatever you want. I wanna watch THIS. Then again I may not. What's yer pleasure? A cut-rate blow job or a bold foot massage?

...and while all this is going on:

CHUCK,

I want to thank you for the refresher on SCANDAL IN BOHEMIA (I'm stunned I forgot that was the Adler story) and ADVENTURE OF THE YELLOW FACE, one I never read.

Harlan:

Oh, yes, that would be really great (I know my wife would get a big kick out of that CD). About the costs I wouldn't worry too much about it. The Reader is a free weekly, so the only thing costs I see are those of postage and handling.

I'll keep you posted.

(Okay, that's three postings for the day, but I know Rick will understand. Now back to work and my grilled ham and cheese sandwich.)

Alejandro

HEY, ALEJANDRO, P.S.:

I recently scored a duplicate copy of one of my favorite CDs, THE ART OF THE ARABIAN FLUTE. Apart from any other pro forma reimbursement for the previously-entered post, would you like to have my second copy of this nifty item, no charge, as a small thankyou?

Lemme know. Harlan

Harlan:

Consider it done. I'll send them no later than Tuesday.

Alejandro

ALEJANDRO:

Would you please snag me three (3) copies of THE READER with that McSweeney's review in it? If it's not too much trouble!

You can send them to me care of THE HARLAN ELLISON RECORDING COLLECTION / Post Office Box 55548 / Sherman Oaks, California /
91413-0548 or my home address, if you have it. And whatever expense is incurred in time, effort or outlay of funds, please advise so I can reimburse you.

And thank you for bringing this to my attention. Both I and the archivists will sing your plaudits.

Yr. pal, Harlan

Frank: I know you want to tell me everything. You can e-mail me the story of your life, and I promise it will stay our secret... well, OK, I might read it to Jim, but only because he'd make me.

C'mon, Frank, pretty please with organic shade grown sugar that did not exploit the workers on top?

PAB
virulent strain at yahoo dot com

JIM DAVIS & PA BERMAN: Calm yourselves. Using the many resources I have available via the internet and Pony Express, I contacted a P.I. friend (who shall remain nameless, so as not blow his cover) who proceeded to do a Lexus-Nexus search on Frank Church (which is, by the way, a pseudonym) and any aliases that might be connected to that name. Here's the skinny on Frank, sent to me by the anonymous P.I.:

"An Air Force brat, Frank Church, nee Frank Helmut Wifilbaum was born, 1928, in Heidelburg, Germany. His father was a highly decorated pilot in the U.S. Air Force, and eventually became one of the original Blue Angels, taking his family all across the world as that team of high-flying acrobats thrilled crowds at various Army, Navy and Air Force bases around the globe. Over the next 18 years, young Frank lived in 12 different countries and 17 different states. According to the psychiatric files my friend was able to break into, this constant moving had more than the usual traumatic effect on Frank. That's right, his personality literally shattered, regrouping itself into 27 different "people"...all living in one mind. Among that crowd was: Lynn "Round Mama" Elliot, who could sing the blues like nobody's business; Arnold Waynewright, a CPA who eventually wound up working for Enron; Neville Sherman, failed singing star once related to the very famous Bobby Sherman; and Noam Chomsky, noted linguist and writer. In 1998, after years of unsuccessful therapy (and mostly unsuccessful artisitic careers by his various personalities), a team of Forensic Psychiatrists were able to join nearly all of the various personalities in Frank Wifilbaums mind. By '98, Noam Chomsky had become so real, the phsychiatrists (with the help of a team of a crack, biocybernetic surgical team) placed the mind of Noam Chomsky in another vessel, and -- for the first time in 70 years -- set Frank Wifilbaum free. Literally a new man, Frank changed his last name to Church, took up residence in Skidmore, Texas, and opened his own Lighting and Ceiling Fan store. He married a young, high-school dropout soon after (in '99), and, a year later, became the first man older than Tony Randall to father a child."

I don't know about you guys, but when I read all that, I teared up. I say we let Frank live in peace, now. He's on the straight and narrow, and living the American Dream. God bless us all...everyone!
--DTS

Okay, Rick, Blow Me up Real Gooooooood!
That's UP, Rick, not just "Blow me". Apologies in advance for short second post.

Jon: They are the same, essentially, with a large exception: the Illustrated has far fewer, less in-depth entries, and lots of purty pichurs. Same editors, same format.

Read "Oryx", and had the same feelings, too, but where you saw Dick, I kept thinking of Disch's "The Genocides". Somebody should turn Atwood onto Kate Wilhelm, and "Where Late the Sweet Birds Sang" or Russ' "The Female Man".

Bye, Scott

John K: Are the Illustrated Encyclopedia and the Encyclopedia of Science Fiction (Clute and Nicholls) two different things? I've got the second one, along with the Encyclopedia of Fantasy. Scott's right about the timeline problems, though the Fantasy volume makes it up to about 1996 thanks to its later release date.

One of the volumes initially contained an Ellison entry that was botched and/or biased enough to require revision. I'm sure one of the kind folks here knows the story better than I (and if that anecdote's just an internet rumour, I guess I'll take my lumps).

Reading Oryx and Crake (Atwood) now. I actually like it, but it seems to be treading in Dick and Pohl&Kornbluth territory, which means reading it is a bit deja viewy.

May the Good Lord take a liking to you and blow you up real soon,

Jon

John K:

Yes, Ellison has entry into the Fantasy Encyclopedia, and a rather expansive one. A few errors and omissions, but he gets fair credit IMO.

For me, the bitch with Clute et al is that there's been no revision to any edition since 1992. Pity, considering there's a good number of writers who won't get deserved inclusion, based on being too current. However, should you want a neat aside, there's a CD-Rom version of the publication, from Grolier:

http://gi.grolier.com/gi/products/reference/esf/docs/esfxplre.html

The interviews and comments from authors are taken from a Canadian television series that aired on TVOntario (Ontario's PBS) called "Prisoners of Gravity". It even includes a few juicy bits of Ellison.

Bye bye for now. Back to the salt mines...

Scott

Fellow Webderlanders:

If you are in the Chicago area, pick up this week's edition of "The Reader". It carries a short review of the McSweeney's Anthology praising Harlan's story as "a nimble philosophical turn with a sweet punch line".

Alejandro

Goddammit, Todd
Don't screw things up for the rest of us. I'm with Bermanator on this one: Let us rip down the veils of digital maya that separate us from the truth! Let us see--in all its refulgence, unencumbered by the quotidian protocols of Webderlandish discourse--the glory that is Frank Church! (Even YHVH let Moses see his real face, once.) I raise my voice with the teeming millions to ask, "WHO are you really, Frank Church? WHAT fuels your ardent desire for social justice? WHERE do you live? HOW do you stay so damned unflappable in the face of withering criticism? And WHY don't you have an AM talk radio show?"

Give us SOMETHING, fer chrissakes. I mean, help a brother out--okay?

Serious as a brain embolism,
Jim Davis

(RIP, June Carter Cash 1929-2003)

CHEW-Z, O FELLOW DICK-HEAD, CHEW-Z!
I'd rather explore the parameters of the mindset of a sybiotic creature trying to recreate "my" reality (good luck there)than be in a Perky Pat layout.

I'd switch heads to make a "Sullen Sally". WHY is she sullen you ask? NO GENITALIA! AAAaagh!!!

Noope! I'll grow a garden and f*ck, too.

Rodeo Clowns & Drawing Fire ?



To Whom It May Concern:

(and I quote...)

"Here's the deal. This is Harlan's little breakfast nook at Webderland. When he's not here, we chat about him and his work. When he is, we act like we're guests in his home. That's about all there is to it" ~Rick Wyatt~


Ms Reeston,

It was kind of you to say that what I write has "consequence" and I thank you for that comment, but I think I should point out that the focus of this forum is Harlan Ellison and his writing, not me and mine.


Mr Ellison,

I was concerned that Mr Miller, who seems to be new to Webderland, might have been in danger of becoming the target of some of the more over-zealous regulars who frequent this message board. I figured chances were I'd be the target instead, if I posted, and I thought I might be better able to deal with things than some unsuspecting, defenseless new guy. But upon re-reading my last post I saw that I didn't make as much sense as I thought I had at the time. My mind was on gardening and the fact that the kennel needed mucking out, and other such mundane realities, more than it was on what I was writing.

I never thought you'd be offended by Mr Miller's question, nor did I consider for a moment that you'd be so petty as to not dain to respond to him. If that's what you got from my post, as it seems you might have, then I didn't communicate very well, and that makes me think I want to pay more careful attention in the future to how I say things you might read.

"She"
(aka Diana)

*http://www.rainbowbrite.tv/story.htm

Don't Do It, Frank!!!
Frank, please, I beg of you, do not answer P.A.'s post. If you give yourself away, the wonderful picture I have of your being will go up in BBQ-fueled flames and one of the last joys I have on this board will be ruined.

You must stay Frank Church. Please, don't change. Don't tell us what you do for a living and who you sleep with and which hand you masturbate with when you're not sleeping with anyone and how tall you are and how old and how sleepy-eyed and how white your teeth are and what books are on your shelf beside the collected Chommmskeeeee and what you happen to be watching on the tube right now and whether you pick your nose with your left index finger or your right pinky or if you're bald or a long haired hippy freak or if you pop your pimples or simply let them simmer and boil off.

Don't be anything to us more than you have always been.

My pal, Frank Church!

-TODD

clutey clutey clute clute
So the thing is I bought John Clute's SCIENCE FICTION: THE ILLUSTRATED ENCYCLOPEDIA And it's cool and I liked it. But I couldn't help feeling Harlan Ellison got short shrift.

After some thought, though, it made sense. Despite Ellison's popularity with SF readers, and the fact that some of his stories are justly part of the genre canon, he isn't an SF writer. However much he may, at times, garb his stories in that particular clothing.

I haven't read Clute's fantasy encyclopedia. Does Ellison have an entry in it? Is it similar to the SF one?

Anyway, ultimately Ellison's contribution is to literature, not SF literature, or fantasy literature, or pornographic literature, or postmodern literature, or whatever. Like Jonathan Carroll, he crosses genres with impudence and a confident joy.

An intermission from a hiatus
The vacation from Webderland continues....fresh air! Green grass! Lawsuits against Oreos! Ah, the real world...

Procrustean Bed on order from Amazon used books. I'll post a review after I've read it. Bet you can't wait.

Picked up Human Torch 16, in Very Good condition. For those of you who haven't seen Alex Schomburg's absolutely fab covers, here's a link:

http://members.fortunecity.com/holeymoley/pages/humantorch/humantorch2.htm

They sold the original artwork at auction a few months back, for about a jillion dollars.

Rather than revisit One Hour Photo, I rented Honky Tonk with Gable and Lombard, Commandments with Quinn and Cox, and Ghost and Mr. Chicken with Knotts and Staley. All highly recommended. If anyone knows where I can get a copy of The Spirit is Willing, a 1967 William Castle ghost-comedy with Sid Caesar, let me know.

Reading A Walk Through the Bible (historical, not religious), The Masters (about the big four golf tournaments), Night of the Generals (some trashy murder mystery with Nazis), The Best Democracy Money Can Buy (for you, Frank), and Mindfield (Corso retrospective).

Have managed to avoid television, except for occasional Star Trek Next Gen rerun (for Ghost of Gene--best watched with gimlet in hand), golf (Annika's coming!), and the Weather channel.

Back in June, pallies.

Ben,

Rob was right about Miss Adler outmanuvering Holmes in "A Scandal in Bohemia", the very first short story. Irene Adler was up against some very powerful people and both the reader and Holmes came to like and admire her versus the Bohemian price, who Holmes, I think, came to despise. There was also "The Adventure of the Yellow Face", in which Holmes was wrong all through the case, and narrowly missed embarrassing himself in front of his client. What he thought was a sinster case of blackmail turned out to be something very innocent.

I think that should answer your question.

Bermanator,

Sorry to hear about your bout with the Martian Death Hunter. I assume you're recovering by now. I also read your statment of how cats have the same effect as the long-gone action figures. Hmm. I never had to change my GI Joe's litter box. On the other hand, I never had Captain Action curl up in my lap and smile up at me with his eyes the way cats do.

Harlan,

If you have a moment after satisfying the creative imperative (long may it drive and guide you) I do have a question. My nephew, at the age of twenty is an atheist. He seems to have come to his beliefs (or lack thereof) at an early age. My agnostic beliefs are the result of a lifetime of experience and internally wrestling with what I truly believed.

My question is, was there ever a time you believed in a god, be it the Guy With A Beard on the Mountain, or an intelligence that created and drove the universe? When did you say to yourself, "There is no God"?

That is enough for today.

Chuck

Mr. Ellison,

I mailed the Hawkgirl action figure today; you should have it sometime next week.

Jim C.

Pardon me for babbling...
...but I've been sick in bed for three days now (perhaps with the previously mentioned Martian Death Flu, that sadly isn't killing me, just maiming), and am just now sallying forth with rusty brain to read this board. A few thoughts enter my mind:

0. Did Ellison ever get the toys he wanted? I hope so. I admire a man who can admit he plays with action figures. I have long since replaced my action figures with cats, but with much the same effect.

1. The source of inspiration: Mr. Miller's question raises an interesting point, IMO. When I am inspired, I DO feel like the story is being channelled into my brain from elsewhere. Really, my best stories write themselves. Hell, my entire novel dropped, fully formed, into my brain. I don't credit God for that, but I can't quite discount Jung's theory of the artist as conduit for the art.

2. Do you writers out there write better when you're happy or when life sucks? Or do you write all the time regardless of emotional state? I used to think it was misery that fueled me because that seemed logical, but I've realized lately that it's joy and exuberance that makes me the most creative. Sadly, I think I'm going to be in a slump for a while now...

3. Have any of you ever asked yourselves: who is Frank Church? What do we REALLY know about this guy, besides the Chomsky reverence and lefty ramblings? Frank, how old are you? Are you married? Do you have pets? What do you do for a living? I can't remember you ever telling us, and I for one want to know.

Or maybe that's my fever-addled brain talking...

PAB

I'd like to differ with Harlan slightly on the question of creativity, and the "where do you get your ideas?" question. I don't think it's entirely unanswerable, and I'd even argue that Harlan's given us more than a few hints about the process.

When Harlan writes introductions to his short stories-- the ones in _Strange Wine_ and _Shatterday_ are really good examples-- he frequently talks about how he got the initial spark for a story. For example, "Jeffty is Five" came from mis-hearing a comment someone made at a party. "Shoppe Keeper" came from a simple question, i.e., where do those fantasy-stuff stores get their stocks?

Now, these are fairly simple moments, in and of themselves. Some of us might think of odd stuff like that, and the most we'll make of it is a quick joke or a one-liner. Relatively few of us expand them out into full-fledged stories. And even fewer of us come up with stories that are genuinely surprising, i.e., incorporating images, themes, and events that don't inevitably follow from the initial suggestion.

Lemme take "Shoppe Keeper" for a moment. Harlan's introduction says that it came from a comment he made to Arthur Byron Cover. Simple enough. And I suspect that, most of the time, a writer would be tempted to perform a simple mix of the mundane and the fantastic, i.e., having the shop keeper wrestling with bills, UPS delivery guys, catalogs, the chain store going in down the block, etc. (How humorful.) But a writer might incorporate things that are particular _to that writer_. Maybe he's going through a divorce, and he devises a plot where a husband's pawning magic stuff that his wife left behind. Maybe earlier in the day, he caught a reference to a famous criminal, and his mind happened to juggle those two bits together. Maybe he writes the initial scene, and for a lark, segues into a radically _different_ scene, as a kind of challenge, and finds some way of knitting them together. (None of this is meant to say that's what Harlan did.)

But the point I'm making is this. When I'd read those accounts of where the ideas came from, it was pretty obvious that there were habits and techniques that could be _cultivated_. One could get into the habit of taking an odd observation, or an "oddmatch" of two events, and using that as the basis of something. This wouldn't guarantee that every story idea was utterly brilliant, but it did indicate that one could cultivate a fairly flexible and fertile imagination.

Now, there's almost always an element that's really specific and really original to a particular person, and there are singular people out there whose particular brains give rise to very unique ideas. We can't codify where _that_ stuff comes from, not even from within ourselves. But it's not because genius is ineffable, or broadcast by some spiritual entity, or somehow "outside" of possible knowledge. It's just that we can't have every bit of knowledge needed to understand the process entirely.

Brains are sort of like wine; no two vintages are alike, and occasionally, some combination of weather, nutrients, and timings will create something truly rich and strange. If it's good, winemakers the world over will endeavor to reproduce it.

Below I accidentally slipped in the word "event".

I meant ADVENT.

Ben,

I agree with you about the CE episode, in that HAD I seen it as a kid I believe it would've disturbed the HELL out of me. There's a number of extremely violent episodes. And I loves it. As it is I'm suckered in by its dark poetry, musing in its pseudo-objective tone over the animate world versus the inanimate: "Rocks. Silent inanimate objects torn from the ancient crusts, yielding up to man over the long centuries all that is known of the planet on which we live - witholding from man their veiled secrets of the nature of matter and cosmic catastrophe..."

It was an interesting little pondering about our extraordinary impulses along with all our baser ones, when there's no guarantee that we can access them and make ourselves somehow more whole—or less vulnerable to megalomaniacal voices that induce one to casually walk to a multi-story window in front of friends and loved-ones...and JUMP.

re: HOLMES.

It's been a long time since I'd read the majority of those stories. But I believe the closest we come to Holmes actually LOSING a case is the one with Irene Adler and, of course, Moriarty. You must remember, though, the cases were chronicled by a very bias Watson. He may conceivably leave OUT the more embarrasing outcomes, for his motivations for writing them from the start was that the police department invariably took credit for the mysteries Holmes solved. It was a thing that stuck in Holmes' craw when they first met. The injustice outraged Watson, thus he vowed to record and publish every case.

I was reading a little about the first actor to be truly identified with Holmes, William Gillette. He was a late 19th-century American actor/playwright who lived till 1937. He contrived his OWN play, 'Sherlock Holmes', with Doyle's famous consent, "You can marry or murder the detective or do what you like.” He became incredibly wealthy just by playing Holmes on stage for years. In the course, he built Gillette Castle (located in Connecticut, I THINK). He was the basis of those early-1900 Holmes illustrations by Frederic Dorr Steele. Indeed, you look at the period photos and his look evokes a great deal. Interestingly, in his entire career he only did two silent movies (ONE being a Holmes) and walked away with his riches. Even the event of sound couldn't seem to entice him to do movies. With the exception of Rathbone, and now POSSIBLY Jeremy Brett, no actor in history was connected with the character more definitely.

HARLAN,

You are truly a wonderful wordsmith. The cadence in your little post below reminded me why you've been among my pleasures since muh early teens. I'm a LITTLE tired of Schenectady - I mean haven't them folk moved on to bigger towns like Buffalo by now? (Unless demand has plummeted that badly; looking at Hollerwood this would not be groundless). Apart from that it was superbly delivered.

I will quote from the Book of Ellison:

"There are an enormous number of dolts who mistake a love of reading for a talent for writing. Anyone can enjoy reading. Very few can write. One can be taught the plumbing; one can be taught the road building; so that a story holds together properly and the syntax is there, but--and this is the only way I've ever been able to phrase it--there are people who simply do not hear music. They are tone deaf. They can read a Stanley Elkin short story; they can read a Thomas Pynchon paragraph or a Doris Lessing book and come away from it fired up to write and still not understand that there is a voice to be heard in that book, that there is a rhythm; there is a cadence; there is meter; there is grace; there is fluidity; that the word draws you into the sentence, the sentence into the paragraph, and the paragraph through the book. They do not understand that...because they don't got no natural rhythm. It can never be learned. I'm convinced of that now. In a Dylan Thomas story, there is a paragraph in which he talks about birds singing in the eaves of a madhouse, a lunatic asylum. And it's the most amazing contradiction that absolutely paints the picture in one paragraph."

I post this as a sorta kinda response to Ellison's response to Miller. It seems to me that the people that ask "Where do you get your ideas?" hear no music. Those that don't hear the music are astonished that the creator is just like him or her and so are reaching for "Where do you get your ideas?" as a way to understand what makes the creator so much more capable than he or she. Those that think writers are "conduits for messages from higher planes, etc." are tone deaf and do not hear music.

RIP, to Robert Stack, who I loved in Airplane, but we all know him best as Elliot Ness, from the Untouchables, and of course, the goofy, Unsolved Mystery; which used to be my favorite show, before I became more of a sceptic. But Mr. Stack did have that great, dramatic voice and chiseled look about him. He will be missed.

----------------

Yes, there is a God, and it's name is Pizza--A slice, a slice, my eternal soul for just a slice. Slavering the webderland pie. Burp.

Ben:

Just checked, and the remake I'm speaking of is "Nightmare", not "Architechs of Fear". In the original, a military crew are captured by the Ebonites, and the Ebonites are made visible to the crew as they are being tortured and experimented on, whilst in the remake, the creatures remain unseen, until their true nature is revealed. Stephano wrote the original, and it was updated by G. Wilson for the second go round. You were quite correct on no remake of "Architechs", and mea culpa for my error.

For a look at the original incarnation of an Ebonite:

http://www.entertainmentearth.com/hitlist.asp?theme=Outer+Limits

I just bought one, and a Zanti Misfit set. My youngest already wants to play with them.

Pity there isn't a Trent, with removeable glass fingers (when you place a wet cloth on his head, a voice give resuscitation instructions), and of course the Kyben assassins play set...

Be seeing you, Scott

Most folk think writing is mostly a matter of inspiration, not realizing it is, in fact, mostly a matter of perspiration (apologies to T.A. Edison.)

Though I am sure a bit of inspiration helps from time to time.

I imagine many people get "inspiration." What separates the writer from the non-writer is what he/she does with it. Inspiration without perspiration, and the skills learned through perspiration, is useless.

On the other hand, hard work isn't sufficient either. There is something you either "got" or you "don't got." That's the part that's so hard to explain. I don't think it can be but I wouldn't rule out the possibility that one day we figure it out. I wonder what'll happen the day we isolate the "writer gene" or perhaps the "creativity gene." Could you get creativity treatments at your corner geneticist?

SCOTT,

Um...there may have been some confusion here. You're referring to the Outer Limits series that ran from 1994 to 2002, right? Well...I checked myself, and I didn't see ANY episode with the title ARCHITECTS OF FEAR. And the plot you described doesn't even sound remotely similar to the Robert Culp episode.

You know...the world is near to a nuclear holocaust, and a group of scientists decide to create a 'scarecrow', a universal threat, which could finally make humanity unite? Scientists take Culp, mutate him into something called a Thetan? Big, scaly monster with huge, buggy eyes? Looks like E.T. if he ever got hooked on steroids?

ROB,

CORPUS EARTHLING, for me, is one of those episodes that is unbelievably terrifying without fully understanding why. Ever seen DON'T LOOK NOW, with Donald Sutherland? Nothing seems to be happening, yet there's a distinct sense of tension, of creeping terror. Instead of going all 'Pod Person' in CORPUS, the victims of the alien rocks turn into hideous corrupted versions of themselves, a kind of twisted interpretation of age and decay. One of those kinds of stories where the miniscule budget and the black & white photography BOOSTED it's value instead of subtracting from it.

Speaking of Sherlock Holmes...did he ever actually LOSE a case in any one of his stories? DID he? Jog my memory.

Jay,

Nothing in your list that I'm that interested in, but I just had to compliment you on your descriptions. Funny as hell, man.

Cindy,

You can get a Hulk Tank toy throgh Amazon/Toys'R'Us:

Hell, it's worth looking at just for the picture. Woah.

Regards,
Joseph

Advance notice on the Toy Liquidation
Pam and I are preparing to dump about 10 years of unopened toys.

I had to catch my breath after writing that. It still unnerves me. Now I know what my dad felt cleaning out the workshop after the same amount of time.

Pam realized that I have more toys sitting in my closet collecting dust than all four kids have combined and it's time to clean house. She's the smart one. She also pointed out that that money could be used to finance the movie we're making (or, she says casually, pay for diapers and formula).

I'll be posting them on Ebay in a week or so with Buy It Now options, but want to give first shot to people who would give them good homes where the they would either be collected properly OR give great joy to those who would simply rip open the packaging and dance the figures around on their many points of articulation.

http://tinyurl.com/bufp

Nothing Golden or Silver, nothing rare enough to fetch a Duke's Purse, but if you're interested let me know through the web site or email.

As for Mr. Miller and the spark of creativity, I think what sets Harlan Ellison apart from the rest of us trench diggers with delusions of fortune and universal respect is that our patron author has lived lifetimes more than most people. That's MORE, not LONGER. Most people are content to consume and regurgitate the experiences of others and live vicariously through the exploits of someone on a page or a screen. Two of the things that I admire about Ellison are his wit and his tenacity which drip from the books he's written, books that are the product of paying attention and getting involved in what the hell's going on. Creativity only reaches so far as your knowledge base.

If you expect that the fantastic worlds created by Ellison (or any writer worth a damn) are inspired by God, I submit that they are inspired by real life; the challenges one faces when he or she steps out into the world to live with passion, strength and courage.

Too many of us sit on our asses and spit up chapter and verse by someone else or other about things intangible or unimportant. We WATCH reality shows and get involved in the lives of morons who mean far more to us than our own families, friends or our own self worth. It makes the insight of people like Ellison seem that much greater for our lack of experience.

So there is something GREATER at work, but I don't think it's God in the sense he gave Ellison something he denied anyone else.

Oh and one last shot on Harry Potter. I've listened to a group of twenty kids discuss Harry Potter in detail in such a manner you'd forget they were the shrieking, screaming, mutant hairless monkeys they were just minutes before presenting the topic. They all have brains, they just have to be directed to use them once and a while.

Back into the darkness, I remain,
Jay Smith

"I expect that some of the people who communicate here at Webderland, those as may dain to respond to you at all, may take offence at your post. They may think you're trying to start stuff because you're bored, and they might suggest that you consider the idea that you stop worrying and wondering about Mr Ellison entirely and get a job, since you mentioned you don't have one. Or get a hobby. One that gets you out of the house and the library. They might suggest that you start hob-nobbing amongst the hoi polloi, and that you get busy, and get a real life, and get some perspective. ("I send you out as a sheep among the wolves") You may discover that you don't really CARE where Mr Ellison gets his inspiration from. See? You may come to see things as I do! HE's interesting, actually...but so what? And???? It's not important. Him being interesting, and exact change gets me a ride on the local public transportation of my choice."

I can hear Rick's nashing of teeth, not so much for what comments are made concerning HE, but more toward others who frequent here. Rick is trying to keep things aloft, but I get the impression that posts like this are one of the reasons that it seems better to just chuck the whole kit and kaboodle, rather than put up with nonsense. Myself and Scotty enjoy your work here Rick, and appreciate what you and the others give to the discussion. I wouldn't blame you if you shut things down now, but would hope you (and it seems most of the others have. Just a sign of better folks with sounder judgement at work.) would simply ignore our little child, until she realizes it's just futile. But, manners and being raised to be a decent soul dictate I say this.

Now, Diana, I can't say what motivates you, hell one would think that you'd take some responsibility for some of the problems you bring upon yourself, but girl, get a grip. Now it's basically conscious antagonism you bring to the table, nothing of any real value or discourse. A pity, as the husband would say, as you seem to bring a voice of some consequence here.

I'm coming to the surmise that this is all conscious, that this is a purposeful design stemming from your voluminous inadequacies in dealing with people, a result of whtever slights life has handed you in the past. I see you as a person who, for some godforsaken reason latches onto someone or something, at first showing good intentions based on a honest desire, then turning on any appearance of rebuff as a sign of people don't like you, and then blaming them as being the cause of your problem. A wonderful self-fulfilling prophecy you've got there. Antagonize, receive just retribution, then blame the other soul for having caused the affront in the first place, so that you don't have to confront things that are obviously wrong with you.

Myself and Scotty have disagreed with many of the people here. Myself and the Bermanator had a rather nasty little set-to, but apologies were made by myself, and life goes one. Scotty and Mr. Ellison have locked horns (I put that one down to stubborn men, and most blame goes by way of the husband), with just a few days ago Mr. Ellison calling Scotty on the carpet for a faux pas larger than the gentleman's question about what brain does Ellison use to write with. Where you meet disagreement with hostility, we have learned to meet it with humour, and it is those who come here and post who have taught us the lesson.

You know what Diana? You're not worth anger. I have to work a bit to pity you, however. Sorry, girl, but I'll be joining the ranks of those who ignore you. Again, a pity.

Hope the site doesn't close, but, should it do so, love to all (even Diana), Melissa

REPLY TO MR. BRUCE MILLER
and THE REST OF YOU CAN LISTEN IN:

Mr. Miller, Sir -- I do not think your surmise is offensive in the least. You ask a question in a polite fashion, and while I thank the Webderlanders for "leaping to the defense" of that holy spark of inspiration I occasionally demonstrate, you need not feel you have upset me even a smidge. What you're asking, if I extrapolate correctly, is the eternal question asked of ALL artists, of high or middling or low craft. And it is, of course, "Where do you get your ideas?"

(As those who have attended my public lectures have heard me say, endlessly, when someone in the audience asks that question, I instantly reply, "Schenectady." And when they express twitchy bewilderment--as they always do, not realizing I'm jerking their chain--I explain, "Yes, there's an absolutely peachykeen Idea Service in Schenectady; and every week I send them twenty-five bucks; and every week they send me a fresh six-pak of ideas." And invariably there will be some yotz who comes up after the lecture and asks me for the address. Ah me. Life is a hideous rigadoon.)

Well, sir, the problem with your question is not that I (or Ray Bradbury or any other creative intellect) DON'T WANT to answer the question, it's that we are UNABLE TO DO SO. First of all, since you ask my opinion of your supposition, I am an Atheist. I tell you that at the outset -- in the event you wish to ignore everything else I say as the products of a tainted or blinded view. But there it is. I believe the concept of "god" is a man-made construct, and as right or wrong as the Egyptian belief in a pantheon of gods, the Native Americans' investiture of the elements as supernatural beings, the pursuit of ghosts and messages from the Other Side by perfectly decent naifs ignorant of the parameters of the physical universe, or the faith most people who play the lottery have in "luck." (As regards that last, my readers know that the prime aphorism by which I live my life is contained in Louis Pasteur's "Chance favors the prepared mind.")

So. For openers, I don't personally subscribe to the jiggery-pokery of some Cosmic Puppet Master who takes note of my comings and goings, my frequent blunders and occasional nobilities, whether I fart in public or masturbate in private. For me, no god. So that clearly responds to THAT aspect of your proposition. But, I'm sure you'll agree, if you can dream up and believe YOUR philosophy ... well, then, I'm entitled to have mine own, however diametrically opposed to yours it might be. Neither of us does the other any harm by believing what we choose to believe.

Yet more to the point, if you were I, and had you spent the greater part of your life learning your art and craft the hard way, increment by increment, book by book, line by line, you would clearly perceive the mental processes that Produce the Art, and you wouldn't need to suppose there was some Outside Intellect feeding the stories into a boring vessel.

I KNOW how hard it has been for me to come to the place where I can wield my talent. Nothing preturnatural or supernatural about it. No more than learning how to lay a line of bricks for a retaining wall is mystical. It is craft combined with the talent that produces what we call Art. It is also inordinately hard work. It is a job. And you must believe me when I assure you that I'm not being snotty, when I suggest that your never having held down a job (by your own clearly prideful revelation of something we need not have known, did you not wish us to know it as a mark of your credits) walls you off from the experiences and knowledge that might well convert you from your suggested mystical explanation to the Occam's Razor explanation of 'it is just a job."

Not even Socrates or Pythagoras could answer that question, Mr. Miller: whence comes the creative spark? It is likely no more mysterious than are the answers to the other Great Conundra of Life: what is electricity? is there life after death? do plants think? why does James Spader keep getting hired?

It is likely that "god" is a series of synaptic connections, firing at random to unspecified stimuli. On the other hand, maybe it IS a great bearded entity sitting on a cloud in a galaxy far, far away. Hell, kiddo, I haven't the vaguest. I just keep on boogie'ing, hoping I do well and don't fall over my feet too often.

Oh, and by the way ... don't be so quick to label those who reject your theory as "boring." It may just be, as, say, Brian Siano's post suggests, they find your proposition stuffed top-full of wild blueberry muffins. And the source of "boring" may be considerably closer to home than you care to admit.

Either way, as you can abundantly perceive, >I< am a bundle of laughs, a bright spark leaping from mot to mot, as utterly non-boring as was Guy de Maupassant or the denser venues of the Matto Grosso.

I'd stick around and talk with you further, but I just got a GREAT idea for a story! (Yes, dad, I'm listening...)

Respectfully, Harlan Ellison

HARLAN: Have you ever written at length about your association with Lenny Bruce? I know he pops up occasionally in your work, but is there a "Centerpunching"-style essay that's solely dedicated to Lenny?

I don't want to take on Mr. Miller's questions head-on, nor do I want to attempt to provide an answer because the questions are asked of a specific person. I did like Brian's answer, though. The thing is, I find the question, the whole post, a little scary. I don't know why. It bothered me last night when I read it and it's troubling me now. Strange.

Take care, all.

Back into the woodwork,
Bill

Where does he get those wonderful toys?
Many of my childhood toys look a little post-apocalyptic. Steve Austin suffered some serious burn damage, the Micronauts are Micronots, Johnny West is missing his shooting hand (shades of Roland in the Dark Tower series), Big Josh with the Kung Fu grip doesn't have any legs, the 12-inch GI Joe is missing a foot and a hand, Spider-man is missing a hand and isn't Spider-man -- he's a Spider-man head grafted onto some other body, maybe one of the astronauts from Planet of the Apes. The 12-inch Hulk is still in fine shape, complete with torn white shirt and purple pants, and Johnny West's horse is still intact as well. The GI Joe helicopter is in pieces, as is the GI Joe action centre. Only the Hulk and Jaime Sommers (the Bionic Woman, natch) and the horse remain intact, to build a better world out of the ashes of the old...

Hey, you should thank me -- I'm one of the guys who makes intact toys appreciate in value!

Cheers, Jon

CINDY: Specifically, I'm in my basement...along with a desk, a writing table, a computer, a printer/fax/copier and as many books as I can fit in one room. The basement is in a house located on the Southeastern side of Kansas City (Eastern Jack, as the folks around here refer to the county). No need to worry. As I recently told an editor, I've been here going on 14 years now, and we've yet to have a tornado touch down anywhere near us (I know, I know: I've just jinxed myself). There seems to be a true, natural phenomenon nearby which some of the weather guys refer to as the "Tonganoxie Split." Seems that all of the major storms heading past us seem to break up, or even divide themselves, right around the town of Tonganoxie, KS (which is near Lawrence, home of KU). Half of the systems go above us, and the other half go below. We DO weather some really strong thunderstorms in this area (wind, rain, lightning); and in the winter, we DO get more than our share of ice (as we did in '93, when nearly everyone's trees around here split in half -- our Oak, the three pines out front, and, oddly, the Japanese Maple, held firm). But otherwise, we're fine. So don't fret. And, TO THE REST OF YOU, I promise to dig out Cindy's address so I can respond to her via regular mail next time (her email rarely works) and not take up valuable space. Just to make a Harlan-related comment in this long-winded post, did you guys know that he actually has a vintage bar of Fels-Naptha in his home? He uses it to ward off bible salesmen, uninvited guests and vampiric, drooling fans.
--DTS

I'm sorry, but this item _deserves_ my risking a second posting today. The BBC reports on the paintings in Saddam Hussein's private collection-- and prominent among the artists represented is American fantasy artist Rowena Morrill.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/3025163.stm

I Have No Idea
Dear Mr Miller,

If you give any credence to such things as IQ scores, I believe I read somewhere that Mr Ellison actually is a genius.

As to whether or not a high IQ automatically connotes depth of character, or anything else noble? ??????

I have to say that Mr Ellison has long offered his readers more than just his stories. He has offered himself. Pieces of his life, and mind, and heart. Many of his "works" are prefaced by his thoughts, contemplations, ruminations and anecdotes. Throughout his career he's shared, along with his stories, revelations about what he fears, and what confuses him, and what delights him. He's shared his rage, and his laughter, and his grief, and his passion. He's been generous with himself to a fault, and all of those glimpses into his inner environment were profered just in case anyone happened to be interested in what else was on his mind besides his strange imaginings.

I've always been interested, fascinated even, to the extent that I don't actually buy his books for the stories at all. No more than I buy the Cracker Jacks for the snack (with Ellison you get a "free prize inside!") (and sometimes, 3D glasses!)

I don't know if he's deep, but he's anything BUT boring.

(If HE *is* channeling when he's writing some of his darker stories, one might well wonder where that inspiring "Spirit" resides, when It's not barreling around inside Mr Ellison's head. Someplace hot and reeking of sulpher, no doubt)

I expect that some of the people who communicate here at Webderland, those as may dain to respond to you at all, may take offence at your post. They may think you're trying to start stuff because you're bored, and they might suggest that you consider the idea that you stop worrying and wondering about Mr Ellison entirely and get a job, since you mentioned you don't have one. Or get a hobby. One that gets you out of the house and the library. They might suggest that you start hob-nobbing amongst the hoi polloi, and that you get busy, and get a real life, and get some perspective. ("I send you out as a sheep among the wolves") You may discover that you don't really CARE where Mr Ellison gets his inspiration from. See? You may come to see things as I do! HE's interesting, actually...but so what? And???? It's not important. Him being interesting, and exact change gets me a ride on the local public transportation of my choice.

To Bruce Miller:

The following statements may go some way towards answering your question. The first two are demonstrably true, and the last has never been refuted.

1. Our brains can be exceptionally creative, and our brains can even surprise themselves.
2. The experience of reading a story is not the same as talking to the author.
3. There is no God.

Books received
Susan,

Yesterday I received the ILL. H.E. and DEMON. Thank you for the amazingly swift delivery. The ink on my check is probably still drying, and I'll be reading the books this weekend.

What's with all the discussion about plastic toy doll/action figures? Did anyone read that PKD novel where they ate Can-D and entered the real world of Ken and Barbie in Palo Alto. . .till the drug wore off. Are you guys hoarding the Can-D or what???

Divinely Inspired?
I'm 40 years old and I never got a job. I spend most of my days at university libraries reading. When I get into a certain author, I get all excited and think that this person is a genius an want to talk to him/her. When I do, however, they seem boring and shallow and not at all like the person who wrote their books.

I therefore came to belive that great authors are really just conduits for messages from higher planes of consciousness, such as G-d, etc. When I point this out to the boring,shallow people themselves, they get mad at me. In the introduction to "Illustrated Man" by Ray Bradbury, he almost confesses my theory.

What do you say Mr. Ellison. Your a "Twilight Zone", "Dangerous Visions" sort of guy. How much of the credit for your "brilliant" writing do you take for your self, and how much of it should go to some other consciousness?

PS. Of course I'm not implying that you shouldn't be paid for your hard work, I think you deserve more and more--but is it really your brain that creates that stuff, or a different one?

Toys and collecting
There's no revamped for the new millenium Eagle Woman Sorceress or Teela in the current toy selection for HE-Man, but they updated the little imp with the big zero on his chest. I feel slighted.

It's bad enough I had to bastardize an Asian Barbie into Rita Repulsa some years back for SOMETHING recognizable. There was maybe a little 5 inch figurine, but NOTHING the size of the

Collecting makes sense to those paranoid folks such as myself who know the icon won't be around for long. Like Earring Magic Ken, for example. Someone screwed up in reverse, and made a valid statement. Better take that off the market.

Harlan,

My Nosferatu can beat up your Batman any day.

Mwahahahaha!

Chuck

USA
:)
Okay, Alex Jay--

Now I MUST have a "Smash N' Go Hulk on Tank" toy.

Your description will haunt me until I have one of my own to laugh at.

Anybody know where one could be procured??

My French Bulldog, Kojack- is compulsive about sexually harrassing the cat, stuffed animals and other dogs--Paris calls his bad behavior " the happy dance". I haven't told her what he's really doing because she talks... alot. I've heard her remark on more than one occassion, " Kojack likes to do the happy dance-- I guess he likes that just about as much as anything. Why, I reckon he'd rather do the happy dance than eat his supper!"

I remain relatively safe from embarrassment (at least on THIS subject) because nobody understands her phraseology.

The Incredible Hulk doing "the happy dance" on a tank sounds like something I must see first hand.


Cindy


Dorman,
Where are you specifically so I can know WHEN to worry!

Cindy


Hello Lynn,
How is Bill?
:)
Cindy

David,
I'm glad you got my note. You holler when you have the time and inclination.

:)
Cindy



Congratulations Harlan on your new toys.
:)
yer pal,
Cindy


I still like the Liddle Kiddles I played with as a child-- nevermind that they look hydrocephalic I can't resist them. I buy them on ebay and hide them from my girl child.

RAYMOND CARLSON, JR., Sir:

The 2 McSweeney's you ordered from the QPB arrived today. My deepest thanks. We sent the eleven bucks remuneration for your Good Offices, as cash, several days ago. We felt that you'd been put out by my request sufficiently, that you needn't have the added tsuriss of having to deposit a check.

Thanks again, kiddo.

Yr. pal, Harlan

Toys shipped
Harlan,

They'll be coming UPS to your home address. Toys & UPS shipping come to $11. Send it along any time that's good for you folks (after the package actually gets there & only if the toys are intact, of course).

Bests,

Tony

Superior? Nah, one thing us anarchists know is that that kind of way of thinking just aids the process of uber fascism; as we have seen in past history.

I kid the dear master Ellison. I collect those cheesy jesus statues: You know, the ones where Jesus is playing golf, or baseball. Adds to my strange sense of humor. I thank Conan O'brian for introducing me to those wonderfully odd artifacts of kitsch.

---------------

Brian, I am not ignorant, we just have a different view about the power corporate culture has on our children. You don't mind children being exposed to another boring series of books about witches, and I think kids need to expand their horizons. How about a series of books about child eating gophers, who eat little children who read Harry Potter. He, he.

--------------

Cindy, you sure are being a good girl lately.

There & Back Again
Speaking of childlike delights, collectibles, commercial tie-ins to cartoons, comics, cereal, and other such things, and at the risk of sounding silly, I've been reminded by this brief foray into innocent pleasures, that I always wore my rubbery mouse ears while watching the Mickey Mouse Club (and, of course, I sang out loudly, along with the rest of the crew..."M-I-C (See ya real soon) K-E-Y (Why? Because we LIKE you!) M-O-U-S-E-E_E_E_E"). I'm remembering devotedly saving up my Bazooka bubblegum wrappers for the valuable free (plus shipping & handling) products offered (I SO wanted that telescope) And although it's not comic book or cereal. or series related, I feel it's both safe and somehow appropriate to confess here that I never ate the Cracker Jacks. I was (and am) in it strictly for that amazing "free prize inside!".


'Tis I

M. Ellison:

No sense of superiority here. Hell, I'd just managed to go through childhood without the luxuries of comics, or heroes, both real and imagined. I'm sorry, but where some see memories and a small happiness toward childhood, I see a lump of plastic moulded into an incentive to get people to eat mulitple processed shit.

Actually, the feeling I get is a sense of envy, of you folks having something the fates decreed that I wasn't allowed.

Ben: Checked, and the second Outer Limits did an adaptation of "Architechs of Fear", this time involving the Ebonites attempting to uncover secrets of Terran technology. The difference was, this time the transformations and mistrust were based upon mental, rather than physical alterations. Still, worth seeing.

Always enjoyed "Sandkings", "A Quality of Mercy", "The Light Brigade", and "Inconsistant Moon" as well.

Scott, would often caddies for Vic Perrin...

Harlan,

Actually, having reevaluated my comments perhaps I DO flock among the "superior".

OK...y'GOT me.

Incidentally, "to flock among" would generally (or invariably) apply to a group. My head just isn't clear this a.m. (I didn't share this with you guys but I'm home with a thrown back and it hurts like hell): is my original use of "flock" - a verb applied to an individual - grammatically correct?

HARLAN: No "superiority" here; if it seemed like I was giving you grief about the JLA figures, trust me, that was just good-natured ribbing. (Okay, maybe it was payback for I-CON, as well. What can I say? I love my Cthulhu plushie.) As someone who recently ordered a complete set of Neil Gaiman's "The Endless" figurines, I have no problem whatsoever with people enjoying the trappings of their childhood. (I draw the line at that awful "Thunderbird" TV series, however. If you're still watching that and you're past the age of seven, then you clearly need a good round of insulin shock therapy.)

Re: Harlan's quandary

Once I'm superannuated I may rediscover something I'm forgetting now, but what's interesting - since you brought it up - is that I recall NO connection between me toys and me comics. NONE. I would say tv and comics reinforced each other by way of the cartoons. Yet I don't recall getting the figures inspired by the books (or EVEN the tube). Perhaps because I didn't start grabbing comics till I was around ten; maybe a little later. And perhaps because the figures seemed badly designed to me, I'm not sure; I was drawing since the age of six, so, really, when something lacked the dynamic look of the animated drawings I'd been thrilled by I'd scoff. TV in many ways SURROGATED my interest in toys (in spite of its ads trying to entice me to get them).

Now, I hardly flock among the "superior" here. Surely you understand that (did my nudging suggest otherwise?). For the kind of creative work I want to do down the line I need to keep the child within me awake (more the teen, actually). I'll need that as a tool to flex with the commercial trends. But these days only Hawkgirl would have the power to draw my eye. I'm a very desperate guy.

As far as toys are concerned, I get the funny feeling sometimes because most (not all, I do know at least one other collector) of those around me look at me like I'm strange. Well, they're right. That didn't stop me from getting an action figure this morning. Now if I could only find the one I REALLY want...

In other news, found this excerpt of Thomas Pynchon's introduction to an upcoming edition of Orwell's 1984. I haven't read Pynchon yet (along with too many other writers I won't mention) but I LOVE 1984 and have added the much quoted (around here, anyway) Orwellian quote about acting like a devil or a lunatic to my computer monitor and website. Here's the link:
http://books.guardian.co.uk/reviews/classics/0,6121,948332,00.html.

Okay, everyone, take it easy.

Bill

THANKS TO JIM & TONY:

I'm current with the Justice League figures from Burger King, and the rest of you can relax. Thank you all.

What does somewhat perplex me, however, is that how such a gaggle of superannuated children as yourselves, who spend hours and hours and hours discussing comic books and movies BASED ON comic books, seem hypocritically superior (some of you, not all of you) when it comes to collecting the toys of childhood memory that invested those passions for comic book icons in the first place, and how startled and pleased some others of you seem to be when you recognize the joy of collecting those artifacts has only been damped in your memory ... yet lives and is so easily fanned into flame. Peculiar.

Again, for the more than a few of you who went on the hegira for my toys, my sincere, my genuine, my adoring THANKS.

Yr. pal, Li'l Harlan

Well, its a hot one; like SEVEN MENSCHES in the midday sun
Not only do ideas come at the worst times, but if one side of the brain is trying to figure something out, and another bit is thrown into the pattern, and then THE FLAWED LOGIC kicks in, and TA-DAH! INSTANT***TANGENT!!!

(Just add water or (ahem) THE CLEAR LIQUID OF YOUR CHOICE)

One time while studying the splitting of a laser beam into two sections, one section being shot "straight", while the other is reflected, then honed to a different calibration, and then merging at the end, someone brought up "The Dark Tower"

Naturally, the hands started shaking, and I told the nice young man I didn't want to talk about spatial perception right now.

ANYway, misheard song lyrics ARE fun. There are spirits eating my cheerios, whoa.

Frankenstein stories
To: M

You asked what does a writer do when he gets an idea for a story? While I'm am not as of yet a published writer, I can tell you what I do when i get an idea.
Often an idea comes to me in the worst times (ie: exams, work), and I can't get away to write down the idea. So I contemplate more on the idea. This allows it to grow until I can get it written down. What I find happening to the story is that other ideas that I never put to paper attach themselves to it. They hitchhike there way onto the paper making the idea even better.
While writting every idea down can help, I find the idea that isn't set in stone grows into an even better story. The idea will let you know when it wants to be written.

Ben,

Culp brought a lot to all three of his episodes. He's superb. Many actors of great talent popped up in the course of the series (including Martin Sheen). But Culp, Robert Duvall, and Don Gordon were the most memorable for me. By coincidence, since you brought it up, yesterday I was watching one of my favorite installments with Culp, CORPUS EARTHLING - one of several which featured telepathic vampires by way of PUPPET MASTERS. It's dark, visceral, and tragic (he's forced to shoot his own wife - fatally, presumably). It showcases Conrad Hall's photography at its Teutonic best with oblique perspectives, smeared lenses, and deep shadows. Really beautiful to watch.

After the series writer/producer Joe Stefano later went on to write THE EYE OF THE CAT in 1969. It was expanded from a proposed Outer Limits script deemed too frightening for kids. Widely praised, it was characteristically interesting and occasionally arresting. The new Outer Limits remade his excellent episode A FEASIBILITY STUDY, featuring classic-era veteran David McCallum. A gracious effort, it missed by a mile (just about everything in that revival series DID).

I agree with you, ARCHITECTS OF FEAR along with DEMON have ENORMOUS profound potential as features. THE INVISIBLES (possibly the episode that comes closest to Heinlein), the one featuring Don Gordon, was proposed as a spin-off series, unique for an anthology show. I believe even now that would have potential today. But it was very Expressionistic and I would want to keep that visual approach intact.

Segue:

I revisited the first Holmes story ever written by Doyle, the novella A STUDY IN SCARLET. It's EXTREMELY well done, with American history and myth woven through it. Of course, it's when Holmes and Watson first meet. It had been so long since I'd read it, however, I'd forgotten ONE interesting but MAJOR detail about the story:

Without going into it at length, do you realize the first adventure was, in an indirect way, HOLMES V. BRIGHAM YOUNG? (Yes, the historical figure himself appears - rather treacherously I should say).

I will never see the Latter-day Saints quite the same way. And it was already bad enough (a SIMPSONS Hallowe'en episode having nearly sealed it with Kang & Kodos coming to Homer's door and momentarily being mistaken for Mormons).

Well, I decided to lunch at The King today, but all they had were Rugrats toys (or that family that explores the wild) No Justice today. Of course, the young lady at the counter...well, english was definitely her second language. Kind of common in the neighborhood where I work.

I went to the thrift store afterwards and checked out the discount books. Scored HMS ULYSSES by Alistair MacLean; the only decent book he ever wrote, and the only one, I think, he really put his heart into. The other was CRIME AND PUNISHMENT, by the Fabulous Fyodor. The second is a bit of an adventure. And who couldn't use a little light summer read, eh?

Chuck

A.J. BERMAN,

Well, as I said, I was 10 years old, so things may well have changed at BK since then. Nevertheless memories of a really - really - bad - burger could traumatize a man for the rest of his existence.

Meanwhile, happened to see AN EVENING WITH KEVIN SMITH last night. While Smith was discussing his experiences on the SUPERMAN movie fiasco, he mentioned in passing the other projects Warner Bros. offered him - one of them being a remake of the Outer Limits episode, THE ARCHITECTS OF FEAR.

A remake of ARCHITECTS OF FEAR? I'm game. Thre's something about the material in the episode that could easily be expanded into a two-hour feature without being forced to add any deadweight to the plot to lengthen the running time. If the new version could REALLY dive into the premise of how a man would react -both physically and psychologically- to such a massive, traumatic transformation and not turn it into yet another rip-off of Cronenberg's THE FLY, then frankly, I'll be a happy guy.

Finding an actor who could rival -or surpass- Robert Culp's performance could be a trickier matter.

Now, when will anyone get around to DEMON WITH A GLASS HAND?

Frank, to writ:

"Children should be told that sometimes life doesn't always go according to plan, and that wishing for something doesn't always bring success--that bad things will happen to everybody. Spoiled brats are born from this sense of personal entitlement."

Agreed, and based upon my own circumstances, life will do a fine job of waking them to reality, even if Mel and I fall asleep on the job. We're not, I assure you. I just feel that kidlit, for all aspersions cast upon it, still gives the child the chance to reach beyond a harder reality, but isn't intended to replace it. The better juvenile writers do touch that as part of their craft.

No superheroes here...Took Danny to see X2, and thought it looked great, but too many characters with each having too much do do within the framework. Thought the "if you prick us, do we not freeze things, or immolate you?" social commentary bland and trite. Brian Singer should've known better than attach himself to this franchise; I guess Keiser Soltze will remain missing for some time.

All this talk of toys and superheroes puts me to mind of "South Park" and the Super Best Friends... Whoda thunk that the way to stop a giant Abe Lincoln would be to create a giant John Wilkes Booth?

Seaman...har, har! Scott

Dear Tony:

Many thanks! 10 Karma points for you. Do tell us how much we owe you.

All best--Susan

Toys obtained
Harlan,

Have just scored 1 Hawkgirl & 2 Flashes. Will send tomorrow or Thursday.

All the best,

Tony

Naiki makes a good point -- as a non-American, it's quite hard to catch all the references Mr. Ellison refers to frequently.

Re Frank Church's latest round of ignorant comments:

I agree about the magical thinking, but I just don't see any of what Frank's talking about in _Harry Potter_. Yes, the kid has magic, but it doesn't bring him anything he wishes, nor does it make things easy for him. And the people with the "sense of entitlement" in the books tend to be serious wrong-oes like the Malfoys.

As for "shades of grey," got news for ya, Frank; the books get murkier and less manichean as they go along.

Okay, now to fill out something Alex mentioned-- namely, the _Spirit_ treatment Harlan wrote in the late 1970s. I hope I'm not doing anyone a disservice if I quote a lengthy passage from a 23-year-old interview with Harlan. It was part of James van Hise's 1980 RBCC Ellison issue:

"It's a nice little treatment becaise it's all full of Will Eisner drawings. I went back to all my old Spirit comics and I xeroxed different panels andd clipped them in such a way that there was no dialogue. When I needed, say, a hand with a gun coming out from a door... of course there's always a shot of a hand with a gun. So the whole treatment is full of Eisner drawings.

"Will and I understood one essential thing: that if you're going to do it visually, what you have to do is write Will Eisner as Fellini. If you do Fellini's vision, you've got Eisner. Kind of gritty and earthy and strange.

"The opening shot of 'The Spirit' is wonderful. Let me picture it for you: It's a long shot cruising down the length of a river toward a bridge, like the Brooklyn Bridge, in the dead of night. There's a mist all across the river. You know, that wonderful Will Eisner mist that hangs ow on the river. The camera starts to rise and goes up toward the bridge when you sudden;ly see a light on the bridge, and it's someone lighting up a match. You can see it through the fog. The camera comes in on it, but not too close, though and you see two men standing and talking. One hands the other guy a sheaf of papers. The guy who was smoking the cigarette reads the papers. then suddenly tears them into shreds and throws them off the bridge. He then lifts the guy and throws him over the bridge, and the camera, which is high, starts coming down. It follows the body until the body hits the water, and then it holds as the paper floats down and as the paper floats down it forms the words _The Spirit_. Then, as the camera comes down to the water, the guy has thrown his cigarette over after the body, and the cigarette hits the water and goes psshh, and you cut to black. That's the opening shot, and it's pure Eisner. It's pure visualization of the Eisner technique, which is incredibly visual. Will Eisner _is_ a director; _is_ a cinematic writer. No question about it. All these other guys who pretend to do that haven't the vaguest idea. I mean, you take a look at a page of Eisner, and that's camerawork, man! The guy has got an incredible eye, even today."

Great set of books to look for, if you want something as an alternative to the lying mainstream news: A great publisher called the Disinformaton Company have a set of books that present news items and essays about political topics shunned by the corporate press. Go to http://www.disinfo.com/ for more details.

-------------

This thing about Harry Potter and wish fulfillment bothers the hell out of me. Children should be told that sometimes life doesn't always go according to plan, and that wishing for something doesn't always bring success--that bad things will happen to everybody. Spoiled brats are born from this sense of personal entitlement. Kids need less things to wish for, and need more things to accept; and that giving instead of receiving is the thing. This magic thinking is dangerous, because it creates the next possible dupe for a cult or some bogus idea, like astrology.

Also, the Potter books have this black and white ideal of looking at morality that bugs me. Most things are grey. Even the craven fiends among us were once gurgling angels in a bassonet.

So many toys, so little...everything...
So I'm talking about an action figure to a movie series that most people on this board don't like (well, most of you don't like what I like anyway, though I can dig what you dig, ha-ha!) and feeling kinda like a fool.

"I need this figure because he has..." I'm saying and I come online and find the request for Flash and Hawkgirl.

Reaction #1: Justice League toys at Burger King?! (That would explain the Hawkgirl paper I found on the ground on my way to pick Courtney up at school last week...).

Reaction #2: I was feeling like an ass going on and on about the action figure I want to find, and then I was relieved. There is someone significantly cooler, more successful, and more talented than me and HE's looking for Kid's Club toys! I'm not a dolt!

Reaction #3: Justic League toys at Burger Kiinnnnggg....

Off on my own odyssey for my childhood.

(And I'm fine. Thanks to the lot of you all for responding last week, it's deeply appreciated though nothing is completely resolved. I'd have updated the MUSINGS page but Geocities--or my 'puter--has been dicking me around. Need $$$ for my own domain. Until then, know that I appreciate the concern and advice and I'll keep everyone up to date at my webhome. I really feel crappy about bringing my problems here).

Off to dig into the THE COMPLETE WORKS OF LEWIS CARROLL, something I've been putting off FAR too long considering I've been hanging out 'round here.

Billy

JIM: Whoop-dee-do! Just send it to the HERC address nownownow,
and don't be bashful about enclosing a bill for services. Thank you very much.

Happily, yr. pal, Harlan

Mr. Ellison,

I was able to get 1 Hawkgirl today, so, if you still want it, just tell me where to send it to.

Thanks.

Jim

Seek And Ye Shall Find
For Sale On E-Bay

Hawkgirl, New, current bid $1.99

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dllViewItem&item=3131105004&category=769

Flash, New, current bid $1.99

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dllViewItem&item=3131105070&category=769

Love,

Diana

ALEX: Thanks for the etymology info on "jamook," something I meant to ask for but didn't remember until after hitting the send key. I DID wonder about the origins of the word.
CINDY: Belated "hello" back atcha. Doing just fine here in the North part of Tornado Alley.
--DTS

Susan,
The check is in the mail. Seriously.

Harlan,
No luck with the Flash and Hawkgirl.

(I am slightly amused at the people behind the counter, though. I stopped off at the BK that's on the way home after work and asked about the figures. Blank stare and an "Oh, yeah.", after I explained what I was looking for she pulled out some bags with the toys already in them. She pulled out Wonder Woman and said it was Super Woman. I corrected her and she giggled and thought that was simply the coolest thing. Like, wow. So all they had were Martian Manhunter and Wonder Woman. The lady suggested I try McDonalds. I informed her that I didn't think McDonalds was running the same gimmick and I got an "Oh, yeah."

The wife sent me to the local Wally World last night and there's a BK in that parking lot. I think it's mandatory that all Wal-Marts have BKs next to them. So I stopped off there and breathed a bit of a sigh of relief when a somewhat older lady was working the counter. Plus, I noticed that the toys were in the big box as opposed to bagged so I stated my desire of Flash and Hawkgirl and she gave me the hairy eyeball 'cause I didn't want anything to eat, just the toys, please. She rummaged around in the big box and pulled out, "Wonder Girl and this green...what is this? Martin Manhunter." That's not a typo. I'm thinking how DC just missed the boat on this one and would be able to connect to all the Martins in the world. Oh, well. So nada, zip, nothing.)

Toys? Oh, I LOVES me some toys. From the Daredevil figure jumping down from the church window on my wall to the Stratocaster right below it. The Belushi Samurai Baker to the Hohner Mini harmonicas (one of which right now hangs from my neck between metal cubes depicting a Star of David and a "Chai" symbol). The laser pointers with which I torture my cats to the Wirething guitar pick I just got (I lust over the Jellifish pick-like thingy--www.jellifish.com).

Toys is wunnerful.

But has anyone seen the "Smash N' Go Hulk on Tank" toy which just came out? It's a friction-pull jobby: You pull it back, and the crupled tank Hulk straddles moves forward, as he pounds on it. Problem is, the positioning, and the expression on Hulk's face, make it look as if he's buggering the tank silly.
(BRIAN: "I can't remember the last time I felt so CHIPPER.")
Worse, the rhythmic arm action, and the placement of the hands, makes one think, "RRAAAARRGH!!! Hulk smash! Hulk jerk!
... Hulk need gym sock."

BEN: I don't know what happened to you at the BK, but I can honestly say that, even having worked there in high school, I STILL eat at Burger King. They are the best of the nationwide chains, in my opinion, with actual FOOD CONTENT in their food.
Oh, sure--the boutique chains like Flamers or Fatburger or Whataburger are great, but they simply haven't the ubiquitous and omnipresent placement that the Big Three have.

DTS: A jamook is a yipyop. A slaphead. A Yobbo. You know--a putz.
And it may--correct me if I'm wrong, Harlan--have its origin in the possibly-forgotten teenage slang expression "jamoke," for "penis."

TARHEEL: Hell; they went all the way up to "octaroon," y'know.

HARLAN: If I may, a question. While talking with the entirely-too-knowledgeable Mr. Siano, the subject of Denny Colt, The Spirit, came up. And Brian said, "You know, Harlan wrote a movie script for that once."

Stopped me dead.
I don't even know how long it took him, laying out what was a brilliant Eisneresque opening scene, to note my jaw, avidly burrowing for China.

Is this something you did indeed write? If so--and I have no reason to misbelieve Brian--it hurts even more than the I, ROBOT or BUG JACK BARRON scripts dead and unfilmed. THIS is why I want to win the lottery for an obscene amount of money--just to start seed for film projects like this.

Is there any chance, somewhere in the EDGEWORKS canon, a book of "lost scripts" might be whipped together? I realize that the permissions and layouts would be a potload of work, but maybe if you could get someone else to oversee ...?

Hmm ... Owen Wilson as Denny Colt, Hal Holbrook (Christopher Lloyd?) as Dolan, Steve Buscemi as Doctor Cobra, Reese Witherspoon as Ellan Dolan, Angelina Jolie as P'Gell ...

Harlan, thank you very much for answering, I'm grateful you took the time and yes I did understand very much that it didn't matter who is white and who is black. But I need to clarify this, maybe I could have found the meaning of passing on a refernce on the internet, but I dropped the question here instead. I'm Asian, and I live in Asia, and so you mustn't see my ignorance as the cultural illiteracy of American youth. I sometimes had nagging suspicions that I had missed something in the reading of Paladin. Oh that is a swell story.

Respectfully,
Naiki

Sorry, Rick and everyone, but I HAVE to break the one-post rule just this once.

Tarheel, What I posted previously was not aimed at you. Your posting came in while I was slowly composing my little skreed. I'm just not a big fan of the "inner child" phrase - my own taste, or lack thereof. I logged off after reading the posts after mine, but I kept thinking about what I said, and I just had to come back and make sure that you knew I wasn't being a jerk. At least, not deliberately. I need to go to bed.


'Nite all.

Chuck

The things I do for you, Ellison
Well, I can now report that the Great Harlan Ellison Tchotchke Hunt of 2003 was a complete bust, at least in my little corner of the globe. I went to three--count 'em, THREE--Burger Kings today, and not one of 'em had any Justice League figures left, much less the two that Harlan specified. Apparently, these little bastards are selling like mad, and there won't be any more until the end of the week. Sorry, Harlan. Mama tried.

Earl,

Your welcome on the Gunn tape. I'm glad that little factoid was useful to someone.

I see Harlan got the info he needed about the Batman toy. It's nice to see someone not be self-concious about their ability to play. I always disliked the phrase "getting in touched with your inner child". As if it were some kind of exercise. I do collect a few things, and I try to not be embarrassed by my little hoard. Especially the various action figures, etc. You see, my "child" never went in. I do, however, get in touch with my inner adult from time to time. I should do that more often. It'd keep me out of trouble.


I do have one question for you, Harlan, if you please: How DO you keep the dust off all the stuff you've got there at Ellison Wonderland? I mean, besides just dusting diligently. Do you have some kind of filtration system at home? I have a real dust problem where I live.

David L,

I read the review in the Mercury. Kind of back-handed in a wishy-washy sort of way. I get the feeling that you're more in touch with what's going on than Sanders gives you credit for.

And good luck with the speaking engagement / book signing.

Chuck

Another term or two for Naiki.
Mr. Ellison gave you an excellent answer pertaining to your question but I just thought I would drop in two more terms for you. Mulatto and Quadroon. Have fun with them.
I am glad that Mr. Ellison still has contact with his Inner Child. One should always enjoy life and find laughter throughout each day. Now I can keep on collecting stuffed animals and know that even as I grow a bit older there is still a lot of playing to be done.
One post from the shadows and no more.
May you all have a most grand and glorious night/day/life.
Moi.

writing
"M" asked about when to write. I don't know what Harlan does, but I would say: Write it down as soon as it occurs to you. Do it! Don't wait!

All kinds of ideas flit through our heads, continually, if we're paying attention, but if we don't capture them they fly away again. Not all of them are great, or even good, but they sure don't do us any good if we don't have them -- great or ill.

It's like the difference between sins of omission versus sins of commission: it may hurt to look at something you thought was brilliant a day or two ago and realize it's nothing much, but that's nothing like the pain of feeling you had a brilliant idea first thing this morning but NOW YOU DON'T REMEMBER WHAT IT WAS.

Although I have to say far too many things are written and shown around -- even published -- when they just don't deserve to be, I also believe far too many things don't get written down at all (by me, you, and everybody else) so that they can be evaluated and improved upon by the writer at a later time.

Things that need to percolate in your head will come back, believe me; but they can always use some help by being set down for later consideration.

Here's the latest review of my book. Sort of "praised with faint damns," as it were:

http://www.portlandmercury.com/current/feature.html

And yes, Cindy, I did get your note. Much thanks. I'm just not in any condition to carry on a conversation right now.

process
A question for all you writers out there, especially Harlan...

When what seems like a good idea for a story... or a plot device pops into your head... or a character... a theme, etc...

Do you write some notes and try to recall the inspiration later in front of the keyboard? Or do you begin writing immediately, using whatever materials are available?

If you write notes, how detailed are they? How thoroughly would you sketch out a story, say on the bus on the way to a Dodgers game?

Over the years I've tried many approaches, mainly for academic writing but occasionally for my juvenile forrays into fiction. I find that if I make general notes to myself, I may never get around to fleshing out an idea. Then again, if I attempt a complete conception of an idea in the first draft, my writing leads down blind alleys.

The question might be this, and thank you for allowing me to come to it... do you let an idea incubate before documenting it, or do you get it on paper so as not to lose whatever inspiration might be present at that moment?

Thanks for all your wisdoms.

M

SUSAN: Weird things conspired to keep me from mailing off my payment until this evening when I walked by the nearest drop box with my Labrador. But now, as the cliche goes, the check is in the mail. (Really).
HARLAN: One of the cool things about having a daughter who loves comics and action figures is that I can play with 'em too, and not have to listen to jamooks (will SOMEBODY please tell me exactly what that word means?) like Jim and Frank make fun of me. I'll scout out the scene here in KC as well (you can buy them without asking for the burgers? Damn! I could've saved my Labrador and Dobermix a LOT of heartburn the last couple of weeks).
--DTS

NAIKI:

"Passing" for white. Many "high yaller" negroes (look up "high yellow" in a book of American slang) were able to slip under the ethnic radar and "pass" for white. Rent the movie "Pinky" (1949) starring Jeanne Crain and Ethel Barrymore. Passing for white is what the dead man's daughter was doing; passing for human is what the alien was doing. But the old man had a wealth of compassion for the alien that he did not have for his own daughter, whom he ostracized ... though both the daughter and the alien (taken in as a foundling by the old black man) clearly were "passing" for their very survival.

This is one of the saddest questions I've been asked in a while, because it reaffirms my belief that the audience is getting less and less literate every day. Here is Naiki, who is likely a clever enough person, who is so uninformed, that this concept has eluded her; and she never knew how to go about GETTING the simple fact, a fact that everyone in America understood from pre-Civil War till the mid-1950s. DESPITE the much-vaunted educational universality of the internet, which remains, in my view, a mute and dumb tool unless one has a brain that knows how to ask the next question (as Ted Sturgeon used to say), and knows how to find that next answer. But because she was born subsequent to that time -- I think I'm assuming correctly -- it has become white noise to her ... and who knows how many hundreds of thousands of others.

Please do not take offense at the preceding remarks, Naiki; I do not mean to disparage you. It's a kind of terrible Cultural Amnesia, and it makes writing well, writing deeply, writing profoundly ... nearly an impossibility these days.

Nor, truly, should you be asking who was white and who was black in "Paladin of the Lost Hour." One of the points the story tries to make is that IT DOESN'T MATTER! To ask THAT question is to miss the point. When it was done on The Twilight Zone, I was required to make a choice, of course; and we went the way we did for visual reasons. SOMEONE had to be black, and SOMEONE had to be white, but if we were to remake it today on the new TZ, I would insist we reverse the colors of the characters as seen in the 1985 version.

What I want YOU to do, Naiki, is to make your own choice. Read it one way, then reverse it and read it again. It's an exercise you should ask your English teacher, or Professor, or Book Chat Club to make. Then discuss it. Therein lies a focus for one's philosophical conception of role-posture in our society.

Respectfully, Harlan Ellison

ahem. Got more questions.

1. The first HE story I ever read after Night and the Enemy was Pennies Off a Dead Man's Eyes, because it was the first story in Edgeworks which I found in my school library. And I didn't understand the concept of passing, and I still don't, and I can't do like the Introduction says and Ask A Black Person because here there Ain't No Black People To Be Harrassed.

Please will someone tell me? So I'll understand.

2. And I do sense that in Paladin of the Lost Hour I'm not meant to know who was black and who was white, Billy Kinetta or Kaspar, but hey does anyone have a definite sense of which it was? I think it'd be interesting.

With regards,
Naiki

HARLAN,

I hope you go to Burger King only for the toys, and not the food. My first Burger King was my last back when I was 10 years old.

Anyway, I can't offer any fruitful advice on the Batman toy (unless he's actually some kind of miniature bomb, if such is the case get out of the house RIGHT NOW), but I WOULD recommend hunting around for the 13"/33cm Poseable Raging Hulk action doll, from ToyBiz. It should be available at Toys 'R' Us or some such place. I swear upon my grave, it's the ONLY toy related to the upcoming HULK movie worth your hard-earned dough.

All right, perhaps the 'Hulk Hands' too, but you can't exactly wear THOSE at any kind of formal occasion...

Did Harlan just say that he plays with toys? I fear our Bard is undergoing regression therapy. A Jefty Is Five move is coming to fruition. He, he.

---------

Karen, welcome to our odd little planet. Note the hanging plants that bite your finger as you entered the temple of Ellison. They do not draw blood, but the itchy welt is a mother.

They all bug me, but deep down inside they mean well.

---------------

I will not mention Harry Potter anymore. Let's just say I dislike the bad plots and cliques, while youse all see them as endearing. End of topic.


-------------

There is a web site that posts the charity giving numbers of certain celebrities, and the news is shocking:

Seems everyone's father, Bill Cosby only gave 28,000 dollars to charity in a given year, and most of that was for a few college scholarships. He is worth hundreds of millions of dollars and only gives 28,000 smackers? Count me out of the Cosby fan club.

Bruce Springsteen, everyones favorite liberal song hero, only gave 40,000 in 1996.

Babs Streisand gave about 780,000, mostly to leftie causes. but she still is very stingy.

Aerosmith in a given year gave only 6800 bucks.

I do note that Kirk Douglas is very generous, with donations around 2 million a year, while his lefty son, Michael, gives very little away.

Aaron Spelling, who must be worth close to a billion only gave 37,000!! No wonder his teevee shows sucked.

Oddly, the corporation Johnson and Johnson, gave a Rob Reiner foundation 700,000, while noted anti-war dude, Dustin Hoffman, only gave 5000 to the same cause. Ann Coulter could use this stuff for her next book, if she were smart enough. Lol.

Thank you. My Batman toy now works excellently. He does, indeed, leap up to hover over Gotham City. Not in the least "cheesy." I loves my toys. Thank you again.

Harlan (who still needs Hawkgirl and The Flash)

I got a question for Harlan, and it's kind of a doozy. I'd wanted to ask him in person the one time I met him, but I figured, it could sound like a rude question coming from a total stranger.

It's about a reference in _Mefisto in Onyx_ to an electric chair, made by the Fred Leuchter Co. Leuchter was, at the time, a well-known designer and builder of execution equipment, like electric chairs and lethal-injection systems. I'm pretty sure he'd gotten some attention on _60 Minutes_ for this.

But when I read _Mefisto in Onyx_, I'd written two pieces for _The Humanist_ about Holocaust Revisionists, i.e., those people who insist that it didn't happen. One of the people prominent in this bunch was the very same Fred Leuchter, who'd written a report for a trial arguing that forensic evidence didn't support the "claim" that poison gas had been used at Auschwitz. His experience with death technology made him an expert, so the defense attorneys hired him to run tests, and... well, if you want to know more, I'll post a summary upon request, but I'd highly recommend the blackly funny documentary film _Mr. Death: The Rise and Fall of Fred A. Leuchter, Jr._.

At the time, I'd wanted to ask Harlan if he knew about Leuchter's second career when he was writing the story. For me, the name sort of popped off the page.

(You can see why I was a tad nervous about asking Harlan this out of the blue. It's the kind of question that begs a whole bunch of others that, really, aren't relevant, and I'd have hated to have Harlan think I was going to be a prick and ask _those_.)

Lurking since ICON, 2nd time posting.
From the looks of it on the BK web site, Batman is supposed to jump up and down on his stand. Sounds lame, I know, but that's how it looks.

SLIPPAGE
I'm new to this site. On a quest for some good reading yesterday, I picked up several science fiction novels (I'm relatively new to the genre) and found Ellison's book SLIPPAGE. Started reading last night, and I'm more than 1/2 way through this interesting collection of stories. Greatly enjoyed the stories "Mefisto in Onyx," "The Man Who Rowed Christopher Columbus Ashore" and both versions of "The Pale Silver Dollar of the Moon Pays its Way and Makes Change." I was familiar with Ellison from his essays (he is my favorite essayist) and have decided its time I've read the stories. An intelligent, passionate and challenging writer. Glad I found this site.

LOL

Harlan!

Nooooooooo,n-n-n-n-noooo. I get ta play with Hawkgirl, see? And that SANDPILE over there is mine TOO!

Jim Davis,

I dunno if I'm with you on this one. I tend to agree with the creepy "lurker" below who argued how blurry the purpose of this side is becoming. The other side was and should remain the open door to new voices and a broad range of topics. I used to hang out in David Gerrold's forum and they ENCOURAGED the variety and as many posts as fancied in any given day. The only difference is I believe he had a couple of sysops "policing" the posts. Here it's mostly Rick and what Harlan has to take from his precious time. With such constraints you may have a point about limiting posts per day; three, perhaps four. Enough to keep SOME flow in the conversation. I know nothing (yet) about running a website; I don't know how forums work off memory. So I know little about Rick's technical burdens. You have a "smallie" yourself; you might know a bit about this ...

Well, I dunno where I was going with that last point; but right now I think it's a better idea to keep the bigger board running.

BTW, if you ever want to settle a score with someone you really detest...recommend them the movie DANTE'S PEAK. Accidentally came across it on cable this weekend. Didn't stick around but I saw enough. 6 months of solitary confinement in old French Guiana would be a lighter punishment.

Folks, this is the same man who, at I-CON, said the wearing of a mini-Cthulhu plush doll on my shirt embarrassed the hell out of him. *sigh* Today's my day-off, so I'll hit a couple of Burger Kings as I run my errands, and see what's available. (Believe me, I FULLY intend to tell the cashiers the toys are for a 68-year old man.)

Oh, and I like the current Webderland set-up a LOT. Sure, the other board was great, but the traffic was pretty heavy, which dissuaded johnny-come-latelys like me from adding much in the way of conversation. By the time I'd check in, the bones of the various topics were not only well-masticated, they were boiled, polished, and sold as roadside jewelry. So, maybe this is a "Harrison Bergeron"-type situation where the most verbal are gagged, but it suits me just fine. (Not to say that you guys aren't great, but jeezus you can go on.) Maybe there should be, say, a three-post limit on the regular board, if it's ever resurrected?

Harlan,

I hope you'll forgive the second post for today, but I think I have a somewhat answer to your Batman query. Looking at a flyer for the toys, it looks like Batman is supposed to "hover" over the base. That pronged item on the back is probably a magnet to hold Batman through the back. What the button does I'm not sure, but it may be you're supposed to put Batman in the footholes to keep him upright, and then press the button and the magnet pulls Batman up. Try holding Batman agains the back while pressing the button - it's possible you simply have a broken toy where the switch doesn't work. Here's a link to the flyer I was looking at:

http://tinyurl.com/bkd7

It say under Batman, "Batman magnetically hovers over Gotham City."

Hope this helps!

Regards,
Joseph

AN ELLISONIAN REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE:

Among the tchatchkes I collect, is the current offering from Burger King. Little toy figures of the Justice League. There will be eight in all, when the series ends. I missed figures #1 and #2. They are The Flash and Hawkgirl. I rather desperately need two of each (one for the archive, the other to play with).

I have doubles of Superman, Wonder Woman, The Martian Manhunter, and Batman. The last two figures are yet to be offered. But all I need are two each of Hawkgirl and The Flash. So I implore each and every one of you, in your farflung venues, to make a side-trip, if it's not too out of your way, to a Burger King on my behalf. You can buy the figures separately, and so won't have to buy any food ... and whatever it costs you in time and money, fear not: I shall gladly reimburse.

One more associated request for smarts. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out how the Batman is supposed to work. The Superman has a little magnet in his chest, so he can ride the runaway comet, and steer it from killing the Earth; Wonder Woman can lasso her nemesis and reel him in with the Lariat of Truth; J'on J'onz, the Martian Manhunter can whirl the green aura around and around till he becomes visible; but when you put the Batman tableau together, and you insert Batman into those two little footprints, and you press the button ... nothing happens. And what the hell is that little two-stud boxlike thing on the back of the diorama? What's it supposed to do? What's with the two little prongs in the depressed footprints? What interesting action is supposed to be set in motion when one presses that useless button? I get nothing. Bubkis.

HELP! I have a toy, and cannot play!

Expectantly, Harlan Ellison (age 7)

Karen,

The essay you are interested in --“You Don’t Know Me, I Don’t Know You” -- was reprinted in one of Harlan’s collections: SLEEPLESS NIGHTS IN THE PROCRUSTEAN BED.

Chuck,

A belated thanks to you for posting a note earlier this year about the DVD version of James Gunn’s “Literature of Science Fiction” film series. The series was originally filmed circa 1970 and includes sights and sounds of many writers who contributed significantly to the field, including Harlan Ellison.

The same outfit that put together that DVD -- DMZ -- also produced one on legendary editor John W. Campbell. Both DVDs are fascinating audio-visual records of some of the seminal figures in SF history. Below is the URL to DMZ’s page on the Gunn DVD; that page has a link to a page on the Campbell DVD.

http://dmznyc.com/html/cssf%20films.1.html

Jim Hess,

Joseph Addison was a 17th century essayist and drama critic (he also wrote some interesting stuff on English gardening, strangely enough). Mostly known for individual quotes these days (as I remember, his drama criticism was rather priggish), but he was well-known at the time for his essays in the early forms of The Guardian and Spectator newspapers.

Regards,
Joseph

Just wanted to wish a happy Mother's Day to all you mothers out there.

I had a question to toss out concerning Dangerous Visions, but I need to read some more before I know enough to form a real question.

Best to all,

Chuck

The adventure of literary archeology
Oh, Harlan: Got another question for you. But first, an explanation: In our last exciting episode of Our Hero, yours truly, I had in my hands a copy of "The Seven Who Fled" because you were so kind and good to clear the clutter in the gray and moldering rat's nest that is my mind by of way of telling me the name of that wonderful tome I couldn't recall. So I have, now, said tome and there I was, reading it, enjoying it, loving it. I turned the page and out fell a yellowed, cracked scrap of piece, on which was written:

'Joseph Addison, 1883: I have observed that a Reader seldom peruses a Book with Pleasure 'till he knows whether the Writer of it be a black or fair Man, or a mild or cholerick Disposition, Married, or a Batchelor, with or Particulars of the like Nature, that conduce very much to the right Understand of an Author.'

I gotta ask: What do you know of Addison and what should I know, after I suck the marrow from "The Seven Who Fled"? Sounds exciting, this scrap of paper, but before I go, thoughts?

We now return you to your regularly schedule, uh, whatever.

Until next time. . .

Karen:

It's, "You don't know me,I don't know you." It appeared in The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction in July, 1977. Here's a link to the contents page. http://isfdb.tamu.edu/cgi-bin/pw.cgi?ae4019
Since you are in Toronto you stand a pretty good chance of scaring up a used copy in one of the local shops.

I don't know you
I believe Harlan wrote an article/essay "I dont know you & you don't know me" about amongst other things the issue of "celebrity" I'd rEEEly like to know if this is the correct title & where/when the article appeared. Would like to get a copy. Thx

David and Michael: Sorry guys. Scoured some of the best used bookstores in the southwest and was unable to a copy of THE SEVEN WHO FLED. Looks like the internet will be our best bet this time. The best I could do was locate two hardback copies of THE DARK DANCER and AMERICA, MY WILDERNESS. Insertion of nasal passages into said books will begin shortly, and I'll let ya know.

J

Yo! You Mothers!

Have a Happy MomsDay, each and every one. Mel's getting the star treatment, from breakfast in bed to a wonderful dinner of Coq Au Vin, prepared by yours truly. And gifts, to boot!

Potter: Only read the first two, but, based on what I've read Chris' sentiments echo my own. The comparative for me in kidlit is John Christopher's Tripod trilogy, and L'Engle's "A Wrinkle in Time", with their protagonists having threats and wonder thrown at them, the tale being told in how they responded.

One more thing: John Lithgow's "Singin' in the Bathtub", and "Farkle and Friends" CDs both really rock. Dig "I Got Two Dogs" sometime...

Scott

HARRY POTTER: I think they're great kids books, the best I've read in a long time. I woulda been in love with these characters if I read them as a kid. Rowling does a fine job of capturing the sense of wonder and wish fulfillment that really connects with kids. In a classical dramatic sense, Harry is a lousy character. He's completely passive. He simply stands around and cool things happen to him or someone else comes in and rescues him. But for kids, I think this feels just right. Kids don't dream of accomplishing great things - they dream of great things happening to them. "Wouldn't it be cool if one day you woke up and had super powers?" I know I always used to think that. Harry gets that. That's why kids love him even if he's totally bland and darn near useless in every situation.

MOVIES: Identity is beyond awful. It reaches right into your brain and hoovers out IQ points. How does this kind of cheap, predictable, manipulative nonsense ever get made? Is there a lower form of life than the "big twist" movies? OK, snuff films. Anything else?

Raising Victor Vargas is not a masterpiece but it's a nice, low-key, sensitive little slice of life movie that avoids cliches and generalities to provide some genuine insight into its characters. Free from the restrictions of a heavy plot/high concept, it takes its time to just get to know a few pretty interesting people. Nice work.


CHARITY: A charity benefits a lot more from the "selfish" rich person who gives "only" a few million than it does from the generous common man who contributes a few bucks. We might admire the common man more but let's have all the "selfish" philanthropists we can get - they make a big difference in the world.

the big board
please re-open the big board. the purpose of this board is being negated by this "family" of folks who, as interesting as they might be at times, seem rather uninterested in keeping to the spirit of this board as well as listening to voices that may pop up from time to time who are not part of the "family"

Birds live in _things_.
Nothing to add to the Frank Church vs. Harry Potter issue, since so many others have added commentary.

New development on the Historic District thing. Turns out, the issue's not even as dead as I'd thought. The Phila. Histor. Comm. told the Inky reporter that they didn't have the staff or the bux to continue designating, that's true. But, they weren't planning on _stopping_. The Inky reporter quoted them accurately, but spun the story incorrectly. So we still have a fight ahead of us.

Had an odd idea for The Novel which would require substantial revision of the storyline, but it may solve a lot of problems. To Alex Berman: wanna get together and chat writing? Wouldna mind bouncing the idea offa ya.

Now for another topic. I've been following the news about a couple of upcoming PC game releases, _Deus Ex 2_ and _Half Life 2_. The game engines are getting to be extremely sophisticated, especially in the ways that stories can take on new and unpredicted aspects-- for example, the "AI" that the non-player figures can have. Coupled with tremendous support for the "mod" community, we'll soon be seeing a lot of people using desktop tools to create some vivid, interactive and dramatic experiences for others.

I'd like to ask y'all for your thoughts on using the medium of computer games for storytelling.

Susan:

Check goes out first thing tomorrow morning. Thanks!!! I look forward to hours of enjoyable reading.

Alejandro

To All Moms...

To Cindy, Alia, Pam, and all others with whom memory fails:

Happy Mothers Day.

But, wait for the kids to be grown, out of the house, and working for themselves before you ask for any items of big ticket value. No sense wasting the perfectly good guilt made of the telling stories of the perils of labour and raising a child to just get cards made with macaroni and sprinkles. Focus on the husband; he's got the bucks.

Remember, I've got a mother, too. :)

Love to all, Melissa

Frank,

Berman had a point a ways back. Whether tidal waves you draw here are legitimate counters (hey, you get what you pay for) or abusive scaldings you endure a lot without losing it. Everyone knows how easily I break (though my last round matured me a bit). Shit! Kick ME around too much and I either stick a Luger in my mouth or scrawl "RACHE" on the doors of all involved and trolly off on a killing spree. (In my better moods I might actually let my opponents choose between the two).

You often post weak arguments and embarrasingly simplistic generalizations but my hat's off to your fortitude. Yield to some logic now and then and you'll have REALLY earned my respect.

ALEX:
Re: "..what I REALLY want is for this man whose work and actions have given me so much enjoyment to be HAPPY, as much as is possible. I'd LIKE a new HE book every year, but his own peace of mind is paramount."

Well said; well said, indeed.

KXL:
Try to pick up a copy of _Partners in Wonder_. There's some of the information you're looking for. In example, from the notes for "Come to Me Not in Winter's White":

“…the opening sets the tone and the major characters and indicates the area in which the work will be done. That is roughly 1000 words. In the second thousand the direction of the plot and the initial complications should emerge; in the third thousand the complications should intensify, the characterization should solidify and the solutions should be indicated, however minutely. The final thousand words or so of a short story of this kind are the summing-up and solving areas.”

Forrester

...and by visiting parents for the week-end, I miss out on another once-in-a-lifetime get-cool-Ellison-books opportunity. Sigh.

Harry Potter: as long as the books get children to read more, or indeed at all, they're fine with me. It helps that they're enjoyable, if not "deep", fantasy; but then, not every book one reads must be a philosophical masterpiece.

Before I head out to the boonis for Mother's Day (and Happy Mother's day to all of our mothers here - that's Melissa and Cindy, right?), just noticed that there's a small nod to Harlan in today's New York Times, in an article about the influences on "The Matrix:"

http://tinyurl.com/bhkw

"The number of inspirations for "The Matrix" can make your head swim. Among other elements, the Wachowskis were inspired by video games, Hong Kong sword-fighting ghost epics, Japanese anime, William Gibson cyberpunk, Philip K. Dick dystopian science fiction, druggy "Alice in Wonderland" surrealism, the bio-mechanical designs of the artists H. R. Giger and Geoff Barlow, David Cronenberg's visions of cybernetically enhanced flesh and "Terminator"-like battles of man versus runaway machine (with a nod to the writer Harlan Ellison and the father of robotics, Hans Moravec)."

Regards,
Joseph

Simply in an aesthetic sense, the Harry Potter series blows dead goats, and that simple truth doesn't change no matter how much fifteen million children and addle-headed adults champion its wonderfulness. On the other hand, Rowling can do with the money whatever she wants to do. Buy McDonald's, maybe. Or a rendering plant.

But you know what's interesting? Cereal boxes. Kids read them. I think cereal boxes are great, because they get kids to read. There's writing on Happy Meal boxes too. They get my thumb-up for literacy advocacy as well. And gum wrappers and chocolate bar wrappers. Children see them and read them. Thank god for product packaging. Wrap _The Brothers Karamazov_ around a hamburger and we'll see true literacy yet.

Cheers, Jon

THE HARRY POTTER, KID'S LITERATURE DEBATE
My 12 year-old daughter LOVES J.K. Rowling's books. She's read them all -- several times. Harry Potter is one of her favorite fictional heros. And while I WASN'T worried that those novels would "ruin" any chance at her gaining a discriminating taste in literature as he got older, I DID think that one of her other favorite series WOULD mess up any chance she had at appreciation of the finer things in literatrue. See, she was getting into those goofy "Star Wars" books. And at first, I tried to dissuade her, explaining that the "Star Wars" books (Jedi Quest, etc., etc) were like cheeseburgers for the brain. Comfort food for the mind: easy to wolf down, but ulitmately bad for the brain's digestive system. Then I noticed something. I noticed that in between reading "Star Wars" paperbacks, the "Cirque Du Freak" vampire novels by Darren Shan and Harry Potter novels, she was finishing books like TROUBLEMAKERS by Harlan Ellison, SUMMER OF NIGHT by Dan Simmons, FARENHEIT 451 by Ray Bradbury, I AM LEDGEND by Richard Matheson and NUMBER THE STARS by Lowry (can't recall her first name) -- the last is a novel about a young girl's struggle to survive the holocaust. After seeing what my daughter has chosen to read (many of them picked out on her own, without my "guidance," I decided that she's doing just fine on her own. And that an ocassional "fun" read (like Harry Potter, Cirque Du Freak, or even -- yeech -- those Star Wars paperbacks) wont keep her from reading some really good books.
--DTS

Frank,

I admire your commitment to your own viewpoint. But when you wrote "to kids, the Potter books are no better than collecting baseball cards." That kind of gross over-generalization is galling, better suited to Orson Scott Card than someone like yourself.

To Lynn:
Lynn,

Thank you for the gracious offer (you're a doll!!) but I'd not deprive you & Bill. I'll take to the 'net with Melissa's suggestion or others.

In any case, I'm not sure yet just how much we'll take to Kuwait and how much will go to storage so perhaps it was for the best I was late in the game.

Ta ta from Texas,
Peg

DOUG AND DENNIS: Three VHS tapes of the 80s Twilight Zone were released here in the UK quite a while ago (back when VHS covers were BIG), and Wes Craven-directed episodes were highlighted on at least one tape, so Shatterday might be included. Indeed, one of these tapes is up for auction on UK Ebay at the moment, featuring Craven-directed material. I expect they'll turn up on our Ebay fairly regularly.

Experience makes Me Somewhat Expert With KidLit...

Husband's in his stripes, the kids are complaining, despite PS2, computer, board and card games, rooms in dire need of cleaning and a beautiful day outside: "Mom, there's nothing to do".

And tons of books, amongst them J.K. Rowlings.

Simply, considering she was a single, unemployed mother on welfare, nursing a single cup of tea across hours of building Hogwart and environs on yellow legal tablets in a small restaurant, hoping, albeit never really even considering, that it could become the wondrous success as it has. And now, because she has won the literary equivalent of winning the lottery (a number of publishers turned her down), she's supposed to give away her money to Frank's and other's satisfaction? I'm liberal as well, Frank, but there's no logic to support your position. In fact, I applaud her as one of the reasons we should support the welfare system, and that some can use it as a means of building themselves back from hardship, if they are prepared to work, and give something to the world.

Yes, there might be some shaking heads, but consider: She developed a skill which is marketable in the workplace, and then went out and sold that skill at what the market felt was a fair price. She pays her taxes in amounts(Peg, or any resident of England can correct me on this if I'm wrong) that will take up a sizable amount of the wealth accrued by her pen, a small percentage of which will go back into the system that supported her (probably manyfold more times than she herself received), and larger amounts of taxes to health care, and other social programs which assist the poor in improving their lives.

On top of that, she's got to give increased amounts of her earned wealth so that her karma is balanced to your satisfaction? Grossly unfair, Frank. I would think that, should one wish to criticize someone for not spending enough to support those deserved needy needing help, some brickbats be sent toward governments who trade away making inroads against poverty for tax cuts to benefit their largest contributors, waste or pork to benefit themselves. I know that here in Canada we need a national housing program (we're the only G - 8 country that doesn't have one), increased shelter allowances to benefit children who are being rasied in poverty.

Yes, Frank, I do believe in some degree of the redistribution of wealth, provided it doesn't undermine the reward of success for people as justification for improving their lot in life themselves, or make others who receive benefit unappreciative of the potential opportunities inherent in personal improvement, both financially and otherwise. J.K. Rowlings, I'd wager, would be the first to agree with me.

Love to all, Melissa

First, an edifying story before I tear into Frank Church.

Today my neighborhood's holding a May Fair in Clark Park, with music, bric-a-brac tables, tables for community groups, etc. While I was eating lunch, the nighbor's eight-year-old kid comes up with his buddy and asks, "Brian, can I have a quarter to buy a book?"

Now, how can say no to that? So I reach into my pocket, find no change, and say, "Take a dollar. buy four." So he and buddy trot off to ransack the used-book racks.

I walk over after I finish eating. He and his buddies are deciding what to buy. One wants to buy a thick David Morrell thriller. (He's eight. he'd never start it.) But then the buddy picks out a book and says, "What about this?" I reach in and say, "Oh, now _that_ is a great book." It was _The Time Machine_ by H.G. Wells.

Okay, now on to Frank.

Frank begins with one of the most reactionary arguments around-- the charity work doesn't count if one's motives aren't pure. If a rich person gives, it's not with the same purity of spirit that comes when a poor person gives. Again, there are ugly echoes with that "if you care so much, why don't you give all your stuff away?" tactic which reveals a reactionary mind-set.

As for his reference to Mother Teresa, I can't figure it. Frank seems to cite her as the saint many misguided people think she was. Mother Teresa was a callous, uncaring shrew who raised millions from the saintly likes of Charles Keating in order to further the most reactionary, conservative, and authoritarian doctrines of the Catholic Church. Her "clinics" offered no actual health care-- just beds, prayers, and surreptitious baptism of the non-Catholic heathens. Her only worth as a "saint" was for photo ops with the likes of the Marcoses.

Frank asserts that Rowling "no longer writes for the art, but for the bucks." This is an interesting comment, because it presumes that she wrote for "the art" in the past. But Frank has condemned her writing as swill, so we can safely assume that he doesn't regard her work as "art" to begin with. So Frank is making another incoherent argument. (I would like to see Frank offer a decently-supported argument that Rowling's delays with the next book are due to greed. After all, if she'd published a first draft a year ago, she'd have made just as much money. And no, Frank, wild speculations about her motives won't wash with us intelligent people.)

Then, we get the Grand Climax of Frank's screed, which reads:

"Harry Potter's success is making it impossible for serious books to be published; especially serious children's books."

Frank, exactly _how_ deluded are you? I mean, you _have_ noticed the stacks of Lemony Snicket and Philip Pullman in the bookstores, usually placed strategically nearby the Potter displays? Have you actually _checked_ to see if the sales of such perennials as L. Frank Baum or Roald Dahl have suffered in any way thanks to the Potter juggernaut? Are you telling me that, because of Harry Potter, Neil Gaiman found it "impossible" to publish _Coraline_, and that Clive Barker was laughed out of Hollywood instead of signing a multimillion dolar deal for his _Arabat_ project?

In other words, Frank, do you just make this stuff up, or are you sincerely deluded?

"Sure, the kid has to actually read the book, but does he do it because he enjoys the act of reading, or does he or she read it just because everyone else is reading it?"

Try _asking_ them, Frank. But I suspect you'll create your own answer.

"Potter doesn't get children to read better, and more than likely, kids won't upgrade to better stuff later; unless the next brain candy rise is published by another writer."

Again, an assertion with _no_ evidence to support it.

"First it was goosebumps and now Potter, next it will be a talking fish who solves crimes."

Guess you've forgotten the comic book _Fish Police_. Pretty funny work, if I recall.

Publishing serious children's books
Frank, no bones about it--you are dead wrong.

Throughout the nineties, I interviewed about fifty authors a year. Plenty of them were children's and YA book writers--Jane Yolen, Tamara Pierce, Lemony Snickett, Gary Paulsen, Philip Pullman, Lois Lowry, Tanith Lee and many, many more.

Rowling often came up. None of these worthies spoke ill of her accomplishment. None said her books were squeezing out other books. Whenever the subject of the Harry Potter books was broached, the authors said that her accomplishment has opened the YA and children's book fields by breaking down old barrers, particularly as regards to the length permitted.

It would be nice if all books were groundbreaking works of art, but any book that knocks down walls that have imprisoned artists for decades deserves our applause, even if it is not, in any other way, breaking new ground. If you don't like Rowling, fine; but your complaint is that her books are somehow preventing the publication of other works. T'ain't true. If anything, she's opened new doors in children's publishing, just as Terry Pratchett has with his new YA-on-the-discworld books. Now that those doors are open, other authors can walk through. This is a good thing.

It might not be DANGEROUS VISIONS, but it's still an open door.

FRANK,

Mother Teresa, however helpful she could be to many, was largely motivated by her Orthodoxy and her plight to convert - pliable idealism under the weight of sublimated self-interest:

Orthodox Hindus were suspicious of her real motives. A Hindu leader once issued a warning, saying: "She is very cleverly converting Hindus. But nobody should be taken in by this."

She blindly condemned abortion all her life calling it "the greatest evil on earth" and the "biggest destroyer of peace.

If the issue of material interest is your only concern, during a visit to Rome when she asked Pope John XXIII to make a contribution towards the poor of Calcutta he offered her a Rolls-Royce. She took it...and auctioned it off at several times its value. Here, along with several other instances, she elicited money which did not in fact go to help the poor.

In reports contested, I THINK (some confirming is needed here), only mainly by the church, she associated with dictators and other powerful but ethically questionable figures in her quest for funding and publicity; she also intervened on behalf of criminals who had donated money to her causes.

It was also reported she'd maintained substandard medical practices in clinics founded by her order.

CINDY,

I want to express my gratitude for your beautifully phrased appeal to Rick. We're an online family, if you will. What do families DO...but fight, claw each other's eyes out, break furniture and dishes, tell each other to screw off...and embrace in forgiveness and camaraderie?

I was trying to e-mail you this message yesterday (with a bit more added in confidence) but it came back to me. There may be a problem with your e-mail address; I dunno. But I thought it would be a good idea to tell you about it.

Frank,

Okay, I'll bite, since you do seem sincere on your assertion that the Harry Potter books somehow stand in the way of "serious children's books" (whatever that means). Care to expound on what the hell you mean?

And as for Rowling and her money - ain't none of my damn business. She worked at it, hit the jackpot, and pays her taxes. Anything after that is her own business - more power to her if she chooses to do charity and help the less fortunate out. But it's none my business, and I seriously think it's none of yours.

Regards,
Joseph

Thesis
Greetings,

Your responses to my request for assitance were very helpful. While I was reading some of Ellison's short stories I realized that he uses irony in most of the stories I read. Originally I was going to base my thesis on the role of God or gods in Ellison's work, but that thesis seemed more apt for a doctorate thesis than a high school one. I have now decided to narrow my thesis to literary devices used in Ellison's works.
I do , howerver, have one more question for you fine folks. Has Ellison ever talked about his favourite literary devices, and if so, where would I find such articles?
Once again any assistance you can provide would be greatly appreciated.

KXL

Brian, you do know that rich folks do charity work, largely because it is tax deductable; and in England that is something important, what with the large tax rates for deep pockets. Sure she gives money, then gets a break on her taxes, which in effect means she gets her charity money back through a back door. In a way Rowling is like the dog who waits for scraps at the back of the restaurant, or in her case, the five star restaurant. She may have liberal guilt, but that is different than being Mother Teresa.

It is funny how when celebrities give away small amounts of money they are treated like they really sacrificed, and they end up getting awards and pats on the back. Oprah seems to get an award every other week, and she is now worth a billion dollars! Doubtful Mz. Oprah got those big bucks from filling tin cups. You don't make that kind of money when you give. They treat Michael Jordon the same way. The motherfucker shills for the evil Nike and we tear up because the sumbitch has a foundation. How much you wanna bet Sir. Jordon has huge tax breaks in his own tin cup.

I don't care if liberal people make money, but giving large sums of it away is part of the deal they make with the great spirit. Sure, live large, just remember that there are people dying in the world from malnutrition, largely because of our economic system, that has wrecked the third world. How idiotic is it that someone would crack on capitalism, but be driving around in a BMW? I mean, if I saw Michael Moore living in a mansion, I'd kick his fat ass. You cannot bleet on about greed, but be greedy yourself. And that is my trouble with Rowling. She no longer writes for the art, she writes for the bucks. She is no better than Clancy or Grisham.

----------

Brian, entertainment is fine, but you are not seeing the big picture:

Harry Potter's success is making it impossible for serious books to be published; especially serious children's books. Sure, the kid has to actually read the book, but does he do it because he enjoys the act of reading, or does he or she read it just because everyone else is reading it? To kids, the Potter books are no better than collecting baseball cards, and I'm talking shitty baseball cards, not the expensive ones! Potter doesn't get children to read better, and more than likely, kids won't upgrade to better stuff later; unless the next brain candy rise is published by another writer. First it was goosebumps and now Potter, next it will be a talking fish who solves crimes. Brian, great plot for your first book. Get on it Bri, then you too could make a mint. But make sure to flash me a lettuce leaf or two on your way to the top.

--------

Cindy, sorry about my hand, just wanted to see if they were real. wink.

Yea, we love our black message board, dont we? My Chomsky quotes are backing up here in the overflow bin. He he.

Dennis - The only legitimate video releases of the 80s Twilight Zone that I'm aware of thus far were on laserdisc, in Japan. They're a pain to find; but I keep looking because I love the series, and my VHS copies from the original broadcasts are only getting older...

I'd like to believe they'll show up on DVD, but my fear is it would wind up being the syndicated versions for the sake of uniformity with the third season.

Susan: Check is in the mail today - many thanks.

Alex:

We're playing the game on an old Dell Optiplex GX166, refurbished with new motherboard, hard drive, cd rom, and floppy, but still using the old Win95 O/S. (Still got both disk and floppy) We've got tons of parts over the years. I noticed the problem too, when trying to play on newer systems and O/S'. I've no solution for you, except to find the old O/S, and then stockpiling it.

Somewhere, M. E. smiles; the luddite bent of AM's venegance has found another path to torture humanity. The cackle turns to a roar...

Is it more compatible with Linux, I wonder?

Dennis: No release on "Twilight Zone", but, I'd keep an ear to the ground when it comes to DVDs. The format makes filling those desires for the older series much easier for the studios.

Got to go. Refereeing three games today. Thank Buddha I quit smoking.

Scott

Twilight Zone
I was just reading through my copy of "The New Twilight Zone" and in the introduction by Alan Brennert he states that he had done an adaptation of a Harlan Ellison piece for AFI but that it had not panned out. Does anyone have any information on what that adaptation was?

Also, since I've been reading through the great stories in this book, I wanted to find out if there is anyway to legally get copies of the episodes of the first season of the second "Twilight Zone" series. I have copies of some episodes that I taped when the show was originally on but I'd love to get my hands on copies of "One Life Furnished In Early Poverty" with Peter Reigert or "Her Pilgrim Soul" or "Nightcrawlers". I realize that the original series is out on DVD but in my querying of dealers and distributors I have found no information on the second series.

Thanks,

Dennis

Harry Potter
In a room where most of the users have consumed and digested the majority of every major speculative/philosophical work put to print in the last 75-100 years, is it any surprise that Harry Potter doesn't do anything for ya?

Let me remind you: They're books for kids. Saying that Harry Potter doesn't stack against your normal daily intake of tree pulp and ink is like saying "The House At Pooh Corner" is not intellectually stimulating enough for a grown adult. No kidding.

The attraction of Potter is that it takes those elements of fantastic fiction and presents them in a form that is more imaginative and engaging than most of the books in the junior reader section of the library. Kids love it because they haven't been jaded by decades of reading hundreds of novels, texts and treatises on the subject of fantasy. These are new, fresh, eager readers who get a charge out of the story and adventure. In this hyperkinetic, flash/boom, watch the DVD world, that's fantastic.

As our overeducated, cynical minds won't tolerate anything that isn't cutting edge or fresh in a century of tapped literary thought, we cannot begrudge something that is drawing kids toward the appreciation of the art form and an understanding of the value of books.

Listen to a kid talk about Potter after reading it. Its amazing.

Ben
Of course, one of the other fun things about "THEY LIVE" is that there are actual black people in the city.

Nothing scares me more than NBC's "New York" comedies. Disney's invasion was a warning shot over the bow.....

Hello. I'm just watching the Roddy Piper/Keith David fight sequence from THEY LIVE, and rupturing my lungs on the process. To quote the Energizer Bunny, it keeps going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going...

Joining the fray here...

I'm not Rowling's biggest fan. Or Harry Potter's. But the woman's making a fortune, and good for her. She has communicated to a huge audience. Maybe some of the kids reading these books will move on to, say, THE GOLDEN COMPASS.

I don't think she's writing them just because they're popular. She'd always intended seven books, right?

And, wow, who gives a shit how much she donates to charities? It's her fuckin' money! I don't want to sound like a Republican here, but it's none of our business. I don't think anyone here called her a sell-out, but that implication ran through a couple posts. I'm reminded of what Nancy Collins once said, that people who use the world sell-out are still living at home.

Even if her donations were my business, what possible connection could they have to the quality of her writing? Why even bring them up?

Bloom may be right. Regardless, he sticks to the merits of the books. We should do the same.

...JK typed, with no hard feelings felt toward anyone.

Harlan's nephew and other things
HARLAN: Looks like your nephew Loren came in fifth at the championships, as far as I can tell. In the 63 kg class, he was defeated in the first round by Shirrad Ahmadi--the match was close; he lost, 4-3. Ahmadi went on to take 1st place, by the by. Loren was defeated in the consolation match by Gerald Silva (score: 9-3), who took third place. I think you can be well proud of his performance.

DOUG and RICH: Thank you for beating me to the punch. No; seriously. Much as I'd want the books, I'm saving for the First Car, and actually for the First Insurance--I know I can afford a car, even a new one, but the insurance here in Philly is going to hose me something fierce.

PEG: "Move to Kuwait"? You seem to delight in extremes when it comes to abodes ...

ON J.K. ROWLING: I'm genuinely happy for her. She's a self-made woman, and one who did it all through WRITING. I canb't speak to the merits or demerits of her work--I have the first book, but haven't yet gotten around to reading it. I saw the first film, and thought it a nice puff of entertainment.
Also, I respect her for taking a firm hand in the marketing and merchandising of her creation. Whether you think it banal or no, every bit of Harry Potter stuff has to meet with her approval--even the ill-fated though wildly popular Nimbus 2000 vibrating broom. To me, that signifies that she's not sold off her creation's soul for a bit more in the way of lucre.
(And I was ecstatic to see her depose QE2 as the richest woman--I despise the Royal Family. Actually, with the exception of Sweden's, I despise ALL royal families, but those of Britain and Saudi Arabia hold a special place in my gall bladder ...)
And her commitment to charity, as Brian pointed out, is quite admirable. It's worthy to note that the first bits of merchandise to come out of the series were those little chapbooks, ALL proceeds for which went to charity.

What intrigues me is what she'll do in terms of writing after the seventh book has been put to rest. Will she take off from writing entirely? Will she start another series? Will she move into more mature works?

TODD: Screw that. The man came by his collection honestly; let him enjoy his hoard. What *I* want from him is more writing to issue from his typewriter.
No; what I REALLY want is for this man whose work and actions have given me so much enjoyment to be HAPPY, as much as is possible. I'd LIKE a new HE book every year, but his own peace of mind is paramount.

MELISSA: How are you playing IHNMAIMS? On a newer computer? Do you know a way for it to work on Windows 98 and beyond? It doesn't seem to want to for me.

Peg:

Might I suggest www.abebooks.com? They've got quite a number of Ellison books available. Odds are, they've got some. If that doesn't work out due to scarcity, come back and tell me. We have an expansive inventory, with multiple copies of a large number of Mr. Ellison's books, and Scotty might have extra copies I can cajole the husband into parting with.

I've been having some fun playing "I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream". I must profess it's rather fun hearing Mr. Ellison as the mad computer. It just seems eerily correct, somehow. Not that the dear, sweet kindly soul who spends his days as a peon of nobled virtue would ever manifest any sort of cruelty or mayhem himself. Besides, I think he's got the cutest blue eyes I've seen in some time.

Ass kissing? Nope, but I've got some skills I've developed involving the mouth.

Happy Weekend, all!

Melissa

Various & Sundry

KXL: Perhaps start to narrow down your choices by perusing some of the resources, book reviews, etc. available on this site.

Cindy:
“Tis GREEN I am – absolutely verdant!” --- And what a lovely chiaroscuro effect as well! How did you do it??

Todd:
The googahs and hodgepodges are being saved for the big garage sale, aren’t they?

TRACKING SHOT of HARLAN, going from box to box, table to table.
“Susan! Hon, you can't be serious! You aren’t going to sell THAT, are you? You CAN’T! And THIS …???”

And besides, Todd, HimsElf’s only 828 months (or is that 483 in dog years?).

Alejandro:
Re: “Me, me, me (he says holding his right hand up like an overeager first grader waiting for his favorite teacher to point to him and have him answer her question)”
- Aren’t you the kid who claimed his dog ate his homework then brought little Snazzie to class soze the pooch could … “produce the evidence,” so to speak?

PAB:
Please get me an address, and I will copy the requested files to Zip disk and send them to you. The email server just ain't working. Thanks again for your interest.

Susan:
Thank you as well. Seldom feels so good to be last on a list. Payment is on the way. And, errr ahem,

Harlan re: the following…
“…they are copies I salted away when the book first was published, so they have resided in the utter dark in the storage bin beneath our bed, since publication day.”

Under your bed? Like, where you two have been, like … “doin’ it?”
To quote Keanu Reeves, immortal thespian, “Whoa. Talk about your special limited edition.”

Every time the collection is taken from the shelf, there it will be, the voice of Mel Brooks’ 2000 Year Old Man, in the back of my head, “It’s hundreds of years later and I still blush!”

(Note: It’s late shift week, I’m more than a little punchy & trying to be funny, Harlan, please take it in the spirit intended. Damn, I should feel comfortable enough to post here without a caveat!)

And a Good Week-End to All.

Okay Rick,

WHY you should bother to bring back the old black and yella.

Because of what Rob wrote to Eric-- because of what I learned as well from YOU about kindness being its own reward and civility the only path to tranquility.

The other board brings us a limitless venue-- a coffee house where we can always drop in and catch up or discuss-- or find warmth or solace. We are not strangers but friends. Hell, even when we fight we pull our punches to a degree that we wouldn't even CONSIDER on the yahoo news message board.

Ahhh the black 'n yeellow how I LOVE that old board.

This one is lovely as well-- but the booth is mighty crowded.. so much so that Frank keeps elbowing me in the boob everytime he gesticulates with that predominant left hand.

PLEASE RICK!!!!! OPEN THE DOORS TO THE COFFEE HOUSE AGAIN-- I'm cold and I need a cup of coconut coffee with my FRIENDS...ALL OF MY FRIENDS AT ONCE!!! I YEARN for the frenetic activity and the endlessly varied topics of the black and yellow.

Wait! Hush a sec....

Do you hear that?

Shhhh, listen.....

It's the theme song to Cheers---

" you want to be where you can see our troubles are all the saaaame-- you wanna go where everybody knows your name."


Shivering on the step--
I remain,

Cindy

Let me in! Pleeeeeeeeeease, Rick-- openeedoe!



Hugs to you miss Lynn!

Allow me to be among the first to say how inspired and filled with AWE I was to see that you gave up your claim to the treasures-- so that someone else could have the set. You are SUCH a heavenly sort and I salute you.



Hello my Frank.



Brian! You'll feed 'em their lunch at town hall before it's over buddy.

DORMAN-- How are YOU?
:)



David did you ever get my apology letter I sent it so long ago and it is important to me that you got it.
:)




To all of you who got the dibbies on the 12 sets-- 'tis GREEN I am-- absolutely verdant!

But I'm keeping quiet on the matter... do I get points?

twinkling,
Cindy

I don't care what Harold Bloom thinks about J.K. Rowling, or any other popular author of children's books.

I am interested in what the elderly academician thinks about Aeschylus, Shakespeare, The Brontes, Tennyson or any of the other classic authors or traditions he has written about.

Frank, don't forget about that other Bloom, named Allan, who criticized popular culture long ago, in a world far away. He may Mozart, but he don't rock 'n roll...

Again, I'm posting twice in the same day, but part of Frank's argument sort of stuck in my craw. And I figure, it's a point worth sharing.

Frank suspects that J.K. Rowling isn't such a good liberal because, he believes, she's making heaps of money and not giving much of it back to charity. Leaving aside its factual basis, I'm not sure if anyone else has picked up on how reactionary this argument is.

Haven't we all encountered some right-wing fuckwit who, when confronted with our concerns about the poor, or civil rights, or human rights abuses, replies with "Well, I don't see _you_ giving those people your hard-earned money." Or, "I don't see _you_ giving up your job so a welfare mom can have it." This argument rests on the assumption of some kind of standard of good faith; in order for a Liberal to be _really_ Liberal, they'd have to behave according to an impossibly stringent standard of behavior. (A standard, BTW, posited by reactionary cranks for liberals to meet.)

After all, any one of us could tell Frank, "Well, if you're such a progressive with such an interest in human rights, why don't you sell your house and your computer and your car and donate the money to Amnesty International?"

The point is that the question-- the argument that Frank is trying to throw at J.K. Rowling-- has several layers of dishonesty, and carries an inherently reactionary stance. It is a demand that someone else grovel to moral standards set up by someone who has no interest in subscribing to them himself.

This is part of why Frank bugs me so much. He's not unintelligent, but for all of his leftist affectations, he seems uterly incapable of recognizing when he's falling into the same reactionary tendencies as those he dislikes. Maybe he'll grow out of it.

Sale?
Enough with the book sales, already. I already gotemall.

What I want to know is when is Harlan going to start dipping into his treasure trove of assorted collections and arts and googahs and hodgepodges?

Come on, Harlan, you're only 31 years away from 100. You can't take it all with you, and Susan can't dust it all herself!!!!

-TODD

Frank, the argument-from-authority doesn't wash with me, especially on the issue of literary criticism.

As for your claim that Rowling should have stopped the books and moved on, as a matter of "ethics," may I ask; by what ethical standard are you trying to apply here? She's apparently been working at the overall, seven-book storyline from the very beginning-- like, since before the first book even saw print, when it didn't look like such a money-making proposition-- and if she wants to stick to a seven-story tale, that's her perogative.

As for her willingness to merchandise the stuff, I don't see much of a problem with that, either. The books are phenomenally popular, people clearly _want_ to buy the stuff, and nothing I've seen of the Potter merchandising strikes me as being any more "evil" than, say, a Superman collectible or a Davy Crockett hat. (The fact that Rowling's apparently wealthier than the Queen makes me giggle-- one more example of the irrelevance of monarchies and feudalism.)

Now for the fun part. You say that you don't believe Rowling gives much to charity. Believe what you want, but Rowling _does_ give to charity; she's done public readings to benefit Maggie's Centre, an Edinburgh cancer charity, and she's a big supporter of groups for single-parent households. And about two years ago, Rowling wrote two short "textbooks from Hogwarts" as part of the British Comic Relief charity. The books were expected to raise about $33 million dollars, and chances are, they surpassed that total. I'll leave it you to actually do some _research_ and see what Comic Relief UK supports. (Unless you need to feel that your resentful complaints do more good for the world, that is.)

As for Bloom's assertions about the first book, well, take his word for it if you want. But I think Bloom was just indulging in hyperbole for a bit of self-promotion-- something he's rather good at, in his circles. I, for one, didn't have much trouble discerning Vernon Dursley from Severus Snape, nor did I have much trouble telling Hermione Granger from Hagrid. The characters may not be wholly original, but they sure as hell are _distinct_-- which leads me to think much less of Harold Bloom.

But do I demand that Harry Potter work on the scale of Shakespeare? No, not at all. As our patron has remarked on other occasions, the most famous fictional characters in the world, the ones recognizable the world over-- Sherlock Holmes, Tarzan, Mickey Mouse, Superman-- tended to be characters created with no more ambition than to entertain. (I know I've mangled what Harlan's said, so I nervously await correction. Also, that list may have changed in the last few decades of mass-marketing, to be replaced with Darth Vader, or Indiana Jones, or Rambo, or even Neo and Morpheus.)

And I've never heard _anything_ supporting your claim that Rowling attacks female deer with gardening implements.

Brian, I did mention that it was Harold Bloom, esteemed literary critic who hates the Potter books, not just me. He just gave me the idea for my rant. If Rowling was so ethical about her work, she would have stopped writing the Potter books by now, and she would have gone on to another different story idea. She slogs away with the same stuff because she knows how popular they are. It is not about quality, but quantity. And if she is so wonderful and liberal, then why does she make deals with toy merchants and fast food hucksters to rake in even more doe? I mean, you would never see Harlan selling his stories like that. I doubt the "richest woman in England" gives much to charity either.

"HAROLD BLOOM: There are mountains of books, and I spend much of my life in bookstores, talking in them, just browsing in them, reading in them. It's a question of what those books are. My e-mail is flooded with angry Harry Potterites denouncing a piece I published on my birthday two days ago on the op-ed page of the "Wall Street Journal," insisting that they feel their children are benefiting enormously by reading "Harry Potter." I think they are deluding themselves. I read the first "Harry Potter" book in order to write that piece. I was appalled that every sentence was a string of clichés, that there was no characterization, that every character in it spoke with the voice of every other character, that it was finally just a piece of goo. I think reading is in trouble no matter how many people crowd the bookstores and no matter what profits the publishers are turning. It's in trouble because we do not consider how to read and why."

----Harold Bloom

-----------

Paula, go see Confidence at once. Great scenes with Dustin Hoffman. A great caper film with an Oceans Eleven wit to it.

-------------

Graphic Novels
Peg~

If you really want it that badly, take mine. I don't have any more room than you do!

Hugs and tell the hubby we said hi.
L.

*aaaaaaaaarrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhh*
I writhe in agony at having missed out on the chance for one of those Illustrated Harlan Ellison sets!!!! I've not been able to check the board daily on this trip. I suppose ignorance is bliss here; I'd have never been disappointed if I'd not realized what I was missing!

If anyone has a tip or two where else I might pick up these little beauties (not as a set, I presume they were originally released individually) I'd appreciate it.

*sigh* I suppose I'll consider it one less thing I have to pack when we move to Kuwait.

graphic novels
i don't think it's fair for someone to ask for 2 with such a limited supply.

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR INTEREST.

Those who got the graphic novel sets are:

ALEX, DOUG, RICH, DTS, DEBBIE, ALEJANDRO, COLLEEN (2), LYNN, MATT, EARL, & FORRESTER.

Thank you. Susan

Harlan and Susan,
Much appreciated and I will not forget your largesse. Thanks again.

And, Doug, you rascal you. Offering to give up your seat on the bus for me. Thanks to the noogies, it appears you don't have to. (By the way, I came up with Scissors, of course. Trust me on that one.)

I've overstepped my bounds here and these two gentlemen named Rick and Rocko are showing me the way out. But, as Ralph Philips once said, "I shall return."

Eric

"I too once again tender my apologies to all offended."

I hope you spot this post before your hiatus begins (I wanted to submit this yesterday following my first posting but bound to a promise I held off). I'd like to briefly clarify something.

I really look forward to rapping with you here in the future. I don't want you to abridge your opinions here for fear of offending me or anyone else. That's not what this is about. Who gives a fuck if you "offend" me because I can't handle another pov? Your view is your view. If we have a hard time handling it we'll just have to bite it. NOR do I want you to "choose your language carefully" for the same concern.

That's not what set me off before, though, again, I had no right to convey it the way I did. It wasn't your "dead" list that got me going; as I'd indicated, I even partly agreed with it (and who cares if it HAD bothered me?). No, what got me going - and hopefully this is something you WILL be able to control a little better - was when you were coming across as a rather repetitive smart-ass. For instance, if you hate OHP it's your business. But if you stamp EVERY post with mocks like, "It sucks." "It's crap." "It sucks." "It's crap.", with nothing else, regardless of any points offered about it it becomes equivalent to using ear plugs and sticking your tongue out at me. Hey, I don't mind if you do that once; but over and over and over...and I tends to snap. Whatever your sentiments about something might be try to qualify so we have something to discuss. If you HAVE nothing else to say beyond "ah hates it", submit n' be done with it. Just don't make it a disrespectful redundancy. Rich qualified his argument, citing what he perceived as problems with OHP; I submitted my suggestions, hoping he might give the film another chance sometime...while conceding his reactions to it may or may not change. The point is he gave me something to talk about; he wasn't trying to be an asshole. Thus, we were able to navigate through the topic.

That's all that was on my mind from the outset. I should have presented my case more in this manner earlier. Don't be concerned when we disagree on something; don't edit your views here for fear of offending. I'll not forget myself again. If I have a bone to pick I'll do it civilly.

Would I overpay for Ellison? Well, there's no need to, considering the prices both here and otherwise, so the question is moot. Beyond moot, I would. However, I have overpaid (from, perhaps, a more critical perspective) for Sturgeon, Dick, Kavan; ad nauseum ad infinitum. Gods, the signed Vonnegut was one piece of explanation to make to the wife, not for the cost, but for the expense of the travel to meet him. Worse, I didn't even get the advertisement moment of meeting the man in some out of the way bookstore.

Ah well, the signed Richlers were easy...

Wasted my one post for the day...So it goes.

Waiting for The Seven Who Fled, Scott

RICH & ALEX:

Susan has made a strong case for depleting my private stock by two more sets. And there was noogies involved. So neither of you has to go into the Coliseum with trident and net to score this offer. But THAT'S IT!!!!!!

No more requests, please. These twelve will be filled, but don't make it any harder on me by someone popping in hereafter with a long, sad story about how you need a set for your ailing Granny who's near nigh to passing over and only wants to feel these crisp pages in her sere and withered claw afore she goes to Meet her Maker.

Susan will manifest herself here in a while, to list who gets what, and then you can deal with her on this little garage sale.

I'm out of it.

Nervously, Harlan

JOSEPH: Perfectly rational and appropriate question to ask. Yes, the 3-D glasses are contained within each copy of THE ILLUSTRATED ELLISON that Susan is offering. These are MINT CONDITION large bedsheet-size trade paperbacks; they are copies I salted away when the book first was published, so they have resided in the utter dark in the storage bin beneath our bed, since publication day. Non-faded, non-read, non-anything.

Harlan

Illustrated Ellison
Susan, kindly hold a set for me, too. Check is en route. Best wishes.

Rich - That "that ridiculously expensive tome" was a bee-YOU-tee-ful first edition of Charles Beaumont's "Remember? Remember?", with a lengthy inscription by Beaumont.

Now, I love Harlan's writing - but ADORE Beaumont, from whose pen magic flowed and music soared. His early departure from this mortal coil was a loss of untold riches to literature, and if I had a fortune to piss away, I'd do so it to bring out a uniform set of his collected works with all the bells and whistles. Even on my meager salary, an inscribed first was a very, very tempting thing. But I wasn't dropping $1500 for it. I enjoy being dry when it rains far too much to squander the rent on what would, in that situation, have become a very expensive umbrella.

But if it means so much to you that you'd throw down in Rock/Paper/Scissors for this set, tell you what I'll do - since I'm in an especially good mood this morning, have 43 other things I can cross off my list with the judicious use of my ducats, and am confident (being the Finder and all) that I'll be able to meet up with the Illustrated Harlan Ellison again somewhere down the road a-piece, just speak up to the lovely Susan.

Susan - If young Master Richard truly desires, I will gladly abdicate my place in line to his benefit.

And for the record, Rich, I threw paper...

Goddammitt, Doug! If you had just bought that ridiculously expensive tome that Bern tried to get you to buy, I would've been the tenth man (please, no Graham Greene references) as you would've been too poor for even the Internet connection. Now, I'll be forced to go see Ghosts of the Abyss just to get those goofy glasses. Do you really want me to give more money to King Cameron? I thought not.

Tell you what, Doug. Paper, Rock, Scissors. On my count. 1...2...3. Ok, whattaya got?

Susan - I think I'm the tenth request through the pipe. At least I hope I am. Set aside a set for me?

SUSAN: Hi, Susan. If you've still got an extra set of the paperback Illustrated Ellison and Demon With A Glass Hand graphic novel, hold one for me and I'll put a check in the mail. Thanks.
HARLAN: Thanks for the answer...and the interesting insight into Holmes.
Warm wishes to you both, Dorman T(wister dodging) Shindler

Susan, if you still have them, I would greatly appreciate a set of the graphic novels. Thank you very much!

Debbie Yerkes

Sadly, I don't need either of the two editions. Scotty has one of the Baronet hardcovers, with the glasses still intact (900 of 3000 signed. I just checked.)

Please keep the offers coming, however, I've a feeling that somethi9ng will pique my interest. The old man's insistant on having birthdays. Imagine the temerity: Scotty feels he's entitled to one a year!

Love to all, Melissa

Susan:

Me, me, me (he says holding his right hand up like an overeager first grader waiting for his favorite teacher to point to him and have him answer her question). Add me to the list! Pleeeaaaassseeee?

Alejandro

Susan,

I'm going to look like a heel here, I know...

Do the copes if "The Illustraed Ellison" have the 3D glasses? I only ask, well, cause that book was my first exposure to Ellison, in the Mt. Prospect Library back in 1979, and they didn't have the glasses so I couldn't appreciate "Repent, Harlequin,"...and, well, this is rather pathetic.

But I will remember "Glass Goblin" as scaring the hell out of me at 6 years old. I'm 30 tomorrow, and "they were not counting gold coins" still creeps the hell out of me.

Regards,
Joseph

DORMAN:

Well, the likely reason you couldn't place the source of that quotation is that I was paraphrasing it from memory, from the book I read thirty years ago. And though I got the sum and substance correct, the citation is longer, and more complex. It is this ... exactly:

"I think that, as life is action and passion, it is required of a man that he should share the passion and action of his time at peril of being judged not to have lived."

The source is OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES, JR. from his famous Memorial Day address in 1884.

One of my other favorites from Holmes is from THE PROFESSION OF THE LAW, two years later: "I say to you in all sadness of conviction, that to think great thoughts you must be heroes as well as idealists."

In terms of elegance of language, as well as clarity and muscularity of concepts, Holmes remains an inexhaustible treasurehouse of reverentially human discourse.

All best otherwise, Harlan

Illustrated Ellison
Susan, could you please reserve two sets for me? Mahalo,Colleen Herc Member

Help with high school Essay thesis
Greetings,

I am a high school student who has chosen to do an essay comaparing three of Ellison's short stories, and a brief biograpghy of the man himself. My dilema is this: given the vast amount of Ellison's work how do i narrow down my choices to only three, and what thesis can I come up with when caomparing said stories.
On the matter of the brief biography I want to spread the word that Ellison is one of the most important writers of 20th and 21st centuries. Believe it or not my english teacher had never heard of Harlan Ellison, but I guarantee that she will rush out and buy everything Harlan by the time I am done.

If you can give me some advice for my essay (keeping in mind it is only 1500 words in length) I would greatly appreciate it.

Illustrated Ellison
SUSAN~

Please to hold a "set" for Bill & Lynn?

Many thanks upon your blesséd little red head...
L.

Hold please.
Kindly hold a set for me. Thanks.

Wadding through alla the missives here and I come across Mr. Wyatt's comment on "A.I"--

and, oh? Really? You and I agree on this,erummmmmm, thing? Wow.

Gosh, Rick. You shouldn't think like me. Harlan will obliged to smack you and hard.

Seriously, it's nice to know I stand not alone in the wilderness on this one.

Until next time. . .

BOOK OFFER
Susan,

Please hold a set of the graphic novels for me.

Coupla things:

1. I just got my hands on a copy of the Fourteenth Annual Year's Best Fantasy & Horror, with Harlan's "Incognita Inc." in it. Great story, very cool premise. I also liked Charles DeLint's story, and Gaiman's poem. However, (and this relates to what Eric said earlier), a lot of the stories in this anthology were pretty disappointing. Even the one from Tanith Lee, and I'm a big fan. Anyone else read this? Thoughts?

2. Why is everyone so nasty to Frank Church? C'mon, guys, really. When you can only post once a day, your acid comments hang in the air for much longer. Frank is entitled to his opinion (with which I partially agree and partially do not--the Potter books are NOT high art and are overrated IMO, but anything that gets kids reading is A-OK with me) without being personally attacked. Not very nice, Brian, and uncalled for. How he handles such regular abuse is beyond me, but I admire his aplomb in any case.

3. Anyone seen CONFIDENCE? I might go if it's good but don't want to waste my money.

PAB

Yep, posting twice today
because I'd like to pass along an item of interest. The magazine _Comic Book Artist_, which recently ran an interview with Harlan, has devoted its current issue to the comics contributors to the National Lampoon during its golden years. As many of you know, I am a huge fan of the era (I own a complete set of issues), so this issue is a fine chance for me to get better acquainted with people whose work was a huge part of my life.

Now, for Frank Church, whose studied "radicalism" leads him to say:
"Brian, ultra-elitist literary critic, Harold Bloom was on the In Depth program on C-Span last sunday and he was asked about the Harry Potter books. He said that those books were trash only suitable for the dustbin of history, and that kids would be better off reading Alice In Wonderland or Huck Finn. Mr. Bloom is a snobbish oaf at times, but I must say that I agree with him on those Harry Potter books. If kids want wonder, then they should fill their minds with true literary wonder and not crap with plots stolen from many other books. JK Rowling is the Bill Gates of literary crapola."

Oh, _yawn_-- yet another attitude-spewing child trying to look sophisticated, by throwing out guttersnipe condemnations of works that happen to be popular. The Harry Potter books are fine, enjoyable fantasies-- obviously not Dodgson-level wordplay, but perfectly wonderful nonetheless. To assert that the material is "stolen" would require taking a _lot_ of fantasy writers to task for pilfering bits and pieces of older fantasies. And the line of about Rowling being the "Bill Gates of literary crapola" is a delicious combination of poseur bile and utter nonsense: last I checked, she wasn't demanding that bookstores _not_ distribute books by any other writers.

I don't begrudge J.K. Rowling one penny of her considerable fortune. But may I suggest that this is what you find so resentable about her? Remember, she was once a single mother living hand-to-mouth, and I doubt that you would be sniping at her if this were still the case. But she managed to take herself out of that state through hard work and, with incredible luck, became amazingly successful. And now she's evil to you.

I suspect, Frank, that you would _prefer_ that such people stay poor, depressed, and powerless. Their continued existence serves as an ornament for your political resentments-- as long as others suffer, you can get some fuel for your complaints. But once one of them actually _succeeds-- well, then they're sell-outs, or corrupt, or simply evil.

After all, what good are the poor if they can't set a good example?

LA County Museum of Art ran a Fassbinder festival last month. These are the restored prints that have been touring the country off and on since 1997, I believe.

I saw Veronika Voss and Beware of a Holy Whore. The first one was amazing and a real shocker to me. I've seen a lot of Fassbinder and I don't think anyone would accuse him of being the most visually gifted director in the world but Veronika Voss is just a stunner - some of the most immaculate mood lighting perfectly integrated into the narrative) I have ever seen. It's Fassbinder's tip-o-the hat to Sunset Boulevard and a lovely work. Holy Whore is more typical Fassbinder and probably one of his average films which means it's pretty darn tootin' good but uneven. Funny as hell at moments. Wish I'd had the chance to see more in the theater.

In addition to the Wellspring releases, which are wonderful, Criterion has decided to release their own version of Ali: Fear Eats the Soul which I think is his real masterpiece (along with Merchant of Four Season.) Should be out late summer, I think. I contend that it's one of the best acted films of all time.

I can recommend all the Fassbinder films currently on DVD except for The Niklashausen Journey which is a tedious bore. Katzelmacher is one of his earliest ones and I thought it was a riot even before I knew the English translation of the title.

THE ILLUSTRATED HARLAN ELLISON
Dear Susan;

Please reserve a set for us.

Un-honkedly yours,

Forrester

PS: Friends do things like this for each other; nice to be considered one n' back at the both of youse.

BOOK OFFER
Deep under our bed (while looking for loose wiring)I found extra copies of two graphic novels. One of them more than slightly rare. It is the beautiful ILLUSTRATED HARLAN ELLISON, long out of print. and we're not talking that hideously ugly mass market b&w paperback version. This is the full-color trade paper edition. We're offering these first to you. (HE feels uncomforable selling items to you all who he regards as friends, but we also know that if we didn't, and sold them elsewhere, you'd all be highly honked.) So for those interested...we have 10 "sets" of THE ILLUSTRATED HARLAN ELLISON (Softcover edition, COLOR graphic novel-published by Baronet, 1978) and DEMON WITH A GLASS HAND(color graphic novel-published by DC Comics, 1986. Cost of this two graphic novel set is $45.00 plus $5.00 S/H. Total $50.00. CA residents please add $3.71 (Total $53.71). Checks made payable to: THE KILIMANJARO CORPORATION, P.O. BOX 55548, SHERMAN OAKS, CA 91413. Let us know if you want the books personalized.

IMPORTANT: Since we're only offering 10 sets, please let me know if you're interested and I'll hold them for you (a hold notice will not count as your one-a-day post).

THE ILLUSTRATED HARLAN ELLISON contains the HE stories DEEPER THAN THE DARKNESS, CROATOAN, THE DISCARDED, SHATTERED LIKE A GLASS GOBLIN, RIDING THE DARK TRAIN OUT and a 3-D verson of REPENT, HARLEQUIN...3-D glasses included. Artists include: The Dillons, William Stout, Steranko,Overton Loyd...and more...with a great cover by Michael Whelan.

DEMON WITH A GLASS HAND: graphic adaptation by Marshall Rogers.

Thank you.

Susan

Please note that nowhere in the preceding post did Mr Ellison ask anyone what they thought about anything. I'm TELLING you...

Rich:

I think your "Who cares?" attitude is best under the circumstances.

Inspired by Rich's "Who cares?" attitude, I've decided to present you all with a list of url's to a bunch of stuff Mr Ellison will, no doubt, also have absolutely no interest in (but who cares?).

Love,

"She"


Tlazolteotl:

http://www.fortunecity.com/roswell/druid/361/goddess/tlazolteotl.html

http://home.mindspring.com/~ariadne1/tlazolteotl.html

http://www.aztecempire.com/empire/Tlazolteotl.html


Erzulie:

http://home.mindspring.com/~ariadne1/erzulie.html

http://www.courses.vcu.edu/ENG-snh/ChattelDance/erzhist.htm

http://www.pantheon.org/articles/e/erzulie.html

http://members.aol.com/racine125/goddess.html


Various Stuff:

http://www.hideinplainwebsite.com/home.html

http://www.cognitiveliberty.org/

http://www.erowid.org

http://nepenthes.lycaeum.org

http://www.totse.com

http://www.akirarabelais.com/i/i.html

http://www.googlism.com

http://www.museumoftalkingboards.com/

http://maddox.xmission.com/

http://members.aol.com/MrSage365/Taoist.html

http://members.aol.com/MrSage365/Magus.html

http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Prairie/6015/pw1.html

HARLAN: I give: Who're you quoting below in that last line?
--DTS

Pursuant to Earl Wells's post immediately preceding: apart from Jeffrey Toobin letting Viner get away unchallenged when he says he had to mortgage his home to pay the attorney -- thereby aping Otto Penzler's assertion of same, which IS true -- when Viner is infamous in publishing as a man who makes his money from a plethora of frivolous lawsuits and expedient settlements out of court -- Toobin's piece makes it clear who is the good guy, and who the poltroon in this matter. That one reportorial gaffe is hilarious to those of us who have followed Viner's chicanery for lo these many years: it is common knowledge that Viner has a full-time attorney on retainer, and that's one of the reasons he pulls this greenmail crap time and time again.

Funny y'all should link that story. I will be testifying for the defense, to support Otto Penzler, if and when this thing goes soon to trial. "One must take part in the action and passion of one's times, at risk of never having lived."

Yr. pal, Harlan

Brian, ultra-elitist literary critic, Harold Bloom was on the In Depth program on C-Span last sunday and he was asked about the Harry Potter books. He said that those books were trash only suitable for the dustbin of history, and that kids would be better off reading Alice In Wonderland or Huck Finn. Mr. Bloom is a snobbish oaf at times, but I must say that I agree with him on those Harry Potter books. If kids want wonder, then they should fill their minds with true literary wonder and not crap with plots stolen from many other books. JK Rowling is the Bill Gates of literary crapola.

--------------

"I believe that today more than ever a book should be sought after even if it has only one great page in it: we must search for fragments, splinters, toenails, anything that has ore in it, anything that is capable of resuscitating the body and soul. It may be that we are doomed, that there is no hope for us, any of us, but if that is so then let us set up a last agonizing, bloodcurdling howl, a screech of defiance, a war whoop! Away with lamentation! Away with elegies and dirges! Away with biographies and histories, and libraries and museums! Let the dead eat the dead. Let us living ones dance about the rim of the crater, a last expiring dance. But a dance!"

------ Henry Miller

Those with at least a passing interest in mystery fiction might want to read a short article in the May 12 NEW YORKER about a lawsuit involving Otto Penzler (noted bookseller, editor, and publisher), who is being sued by L.A. publisher New Millennium. It appears on pp. 38-39 of the paper version; the URL for the online version is below.

http://www.newyorker.com/talk/content/?030512ta_talk_toobin

Vic and Blood
Susan or HE:

Will this book (or the Previews exclusive) be available to HERC members?

Thanks,
Tony

Various Things of Sundry Interest
First of all, I didn't see the need to respond to that long list of why various arts are dead. I figured, it was meant in jest, just a little riff, and not to be taken too seriously.

One comment re the Prokosch book. The last book I read befor this was _The Unknown Shore_ by Patrick O'Brian. And while O'Brian's wonderful, the middle third or so of the book details the sufferings of a ship's crew as they're stranded on an island in South American, slowly starving to death, or drowning, or falling off of cliffs, as they cling to survival.

Now, I'm reading Prokosch, and the first section is the tale of a man who travels from the deserts of Asia into the Himalayas, where he and his co-travellers are starving to death, freezing to death, falling off of mountains to their death, while passing dead villages, dead monasteries, dead battlefields... and now I'm thinking, "Jesus Christ, won't this ever _end_?"

Maybe I oughta read the next Harry Potter book-- but I'm afraid the plot'll involve Voldemort casting an isolation spell over hogwarts, keeping out supplies, and the students eventually starve to death, freeze to death, boil to death, fall off their Quidditch brooms to their death...

Re Hanna Schuygilla. I've never seen her work. But on one of the dating things I'm using, there'a girl I get matched to whose profile is titled "Maria Braun." Good sign?

David:

Since you liked "The Marriage of Maria Braun", you might like to know that Wellspring Media is releasing all of Fassbinder's ouevre in DVD. Next Tuesday sees the release of "Satan's Brew", "Beware of a Holy Whore" and "Mother Kusters Goes To Heaven". June 10th will see the release of "Chinese Roulette", "Gods of the Plague" and "Love Is Colder Than Death". I just bought "Effi Briest" and saw the first twn minutes. Beautiful, pristine black and white reproduction, austere dollies, beautiful Hanna Schygulla.

Alejandro

X2: X-Men United vs Wolverhampton Wanderers
Did anyone else notice that the kids were being captured so they could be put into a cell to have their brains melted by Xavier?

Lethal force WAS being used. If I remember right, the first attacker unloaded an automatic weapon on Wolverine and Iceman. under the circumstances, I'd err on the side of caution and assume that stormtroopers with guns would use them again if one of the kids used their powers in the way, say, Colossus did.

Yours in the discussion of boring, pedestrian comic book movies.

I too once again tender my apologies to all offended. As I said to Rick, I'm going to take off for a few weeks...maybe actually READ a book or two, ones that were recommended on this board.

"Eric Martin posting as: Ghost of Gene Roddenberry"

Yes and no. I was channeling. It's not something I asked for, and can be burdensome at times, especially in church, or during a romantic interlude...suddenly this overweight, beery, ignorant TV scenarist takes over...I've lost a lot of friends....

See you all in June.

Inferior technology is your friend
All: Hey, you know what works for me in terms of limiting posts to this board? Netscape 4.7. Because it won't allow me to post to the board, and because I use it as my first choice for browsing, I have to switch over to IE before I can post. Yes, it's a cheap trick -- but it does add an additional buffer between me and posting.

Take care, Jon

short subjects
Justin: Yeah, guy! Get me a copy!

Thanks for the recommendations, Harlan. Maybe it's time for a talk with my interlibrary loan librarian, who procured several Kersh novels for me last year. (Need to obtain a few more of those -- I'm especially interested in the novel about the Nazi atrocities in the Polish village.)

Somebody mentioned "Contempt." My Godard education is pretty poor, and my Fassbinder ain't so good either. But they're having a Fassbinder festival in town here, and Carole and I just saw "The Marriage of Maria Braun." What a great film! And isn't Hanna Schygulla a total goddess?!!!

HERE'S THE RESPONSE I E-MAILED RICK YESTERDAY:

No explanations needed. I understand. I have great affection for Harlan AND you. The last thing I want is you to perceive a slap in the kisser.

I'm sorry. I apologize to you - for adding this burden to your job - and I apologize to Harlan. And while my frustration with a couple of Eric's comments honestly remain intact (I'd be lying if I said otherwise) I apologize to him for my childish bullying. It was STUPID.

HERE'S THE DEAL: IF I FEEL THE WRONG PETULANT VIBES ABOUT TO BURST FROM MY FINGERTIPS - THAT SAVAGE CALL TO ARMS WE INHERITED FROM OUR DISTANT ANCESTORS (PROBABLY THE HANDIEST SCAPEGOATS WE EVER HAD) - I'LL SIGN OFF BEFORE I TYPE A SINGLE WORD. BY THE TIME I COME BACK I'LL HAVE FORGOTTEN THE FRIVOLOUS MATTER. I will adhere to this rule along with your own.

So, please don't feel wary when I finally post again. I may be a slow learner but I DO learn. I'll keep my composure and express my differences reasonably. The gates to Stupidland have been bolted for good. OK?

Contritely Yours,
Rob

THIS IS A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:

Check out this site:

www.newamericancentury.org

Please check this site out and, those of you that were for the war in Iraq, may rethink the administration's reasons for launching that war. For those that were against the war in Iraq, I think it only serves to place one more cynical nail in that coffin for this administration.

I will say no more, but please check out this site and, specifically, the Statement of Principles. Notice those that signed up for these Principles and wonder again at our stated "reasons" for invading Iraq.

And I apologize for coming off like a crazed Churchomsky, but I really really really don't think this administration is good for America in the long run. Meanwhile, with papers like these about and for all the incompetent work done by this administration, we've got Democrats whose strongest candidate is...Lieberman?? And the Dems are whining about Bush's landing on the carrier?!? Jesus Christ in a sidecar.

Ok, I'll stop now. Wait. An anonymous posting by Diana prompts me to reply thusly: Who cares? The majority of the people that post here (despite my post of "reasons" from a couple days ago) post for the discussion; not hoping HE will ask us what cereal he should buy or what kind of shoes he should wear or what movies he should see. Those in the know don't need to ask. And I would hazard a guess that HE is in the know. This may come off as sycophantic whining to you, but I can't help that. All I can say is it's not and it's getting very hard to carry on reasonable discussions when someone keeps breaking in with a bad case of Tourette's syndrome; mouthing off without actually saying anything.

This is why I post: I post a link that I think some on this board might appreciate or start a discussion (that doesn't necessarily have to be on this board). It can be used as I use most of the statements made in here: I take them out and discuss with friends and neighbors.
If HE contributes, that's just gravy. But, it ain't the reason most of us post in here. I said "most". Take that as you see fit.

Hey, movie fans.

I also saw X2: X-MEN UNITED (there’s a slap-your-forehead title; Jesus!) and agree that the slaughter of soldiers was not quite heroic. But it did add a little gray to the story. And, really, after Alan Moore and Neil Gaiman and Warren Ellis and Frank Miller and Grant Morrison and Peter David do we still want our heroes to be paragons of virtue? I don’t ask this rhetorically.

I liked the movie, but the best thing I saw lately was Godard’s film CONTEMPT. Has anyone else seen this? Besides ALPHAVILLE, it’s the only thing of his I’ve seen. I admired ALPHAVILLE in some ways but didn’t like it. This, though…POW! It’s worth your attention, I think.

Speaking of Harlan Ellison, not that we were, I finally got around to reading his story for the Michael Chabon anthology, and loved it. Just loved it. Very funny stuff. And it had the best descriptions of snow I’ve ever read.

This board has been a strange and volatile place lately. Here’s hoping the pettiness and rancor dissolve, leaving pure rock and roll adventure.

Frank Church: Vision TV is showing a documentary on Chomsky's visit to McMaster University (in Hamilton) on THursday night in Canada. Apparently the doc has been sold hither, thither and yon, so you'll probably be able to see it post haste, if not sooner -- but if you want a copy, let me know at j.stover 'at' [as i try to foil bots prowling the internet] sympatico.ca

Cheers, Jon

This is the first - and hopefully the last - time I've double posted here in the Pavilion, but since it was Susan who took my order and Harlan merely signed the poster, I may come off as rude without giving an acknowledgement. She deserves equal kudos.

So, thank you, Susan.

Lynn,

Did you know that Kevin Smith removed George Carlin’s “scat-singing messiah” number (when he was introducing “Buddy Christ”) from the final cut of “Dogma”? Didja know dat, didja?

You would have enjoyed the Nativity musical I was in a few years ago, “Return, Emmanuel” with an original book & score. Multiple rolls: the innkeeper, father of the groom at the wedding of Mary & Joseph (does that make me God’s in-law?) and Balthazar.

We sang a updated version of “We Three Kings” that .. well, sounded like it went into a blender with the Beatles’ “Eight Days a Week” and “Ticket to Ride."

Harlan,

Thank you for your comments on Tony Hillerman. I've never had the pleasure of hearing him speak but his sense of humor is apparent in his novels. The Great Taos Bank Robbery and Other True Stories of the Southwest is on my reading list.


Chris L,

Regarding X2, I'm not sure it was clear to Wolverine that the soldiers where using non-lethal force on the children. Even if it was clear, as other have pointed out, I'm not sure it would matter to him.

---
I picked up Alone Against Tomorrow last weekend. So much to read yet so little time for reading.

HARLAN,

The IHNMAIMS poster arrived ysterday. Arigato gozaimasu, Ellison-san.

CHRIS L,

Quote: 'Am I too sentimental to pine away for the days of a square-jawed, apple-pie swillin' George Reeves?'

Don't be so certain. The Superman in the 1940's used to pick up and then drop nazis left and right all the time. Granted, they were nazis, but nevertheless...

I also agree Jean Grey's fate in the final minutes of the movie lacked some emotional punch, but it was more than worth it to see that intriguing image in the very last shot.

William Gibson, cyber-punk author is also a great read. So many great writers--too bad a day is only so long.

------------

Wyatt, read my essay bucko. Lol.

------------

Joseph, get the popcorn ready, tell all your friends--Chomsky is coming to C-Span! Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. He will be on In Depth, on sunday, June 1'st, noon to three pm. A live call in for three hours! Three hours of Chomsky, Joseph! I know you are excited. Wink.

-----------

Scat-singing Messiah (Coming to Broadway Spring 2004)
Rick~ I think I hurt myself when I read your subject line.

"Blessed are the meek, skedeedle-eedee, shoodoobee-doowah, for they shall inherit the earth, lahdeendah-deedledah-doowah."

L.

Just Trying To Help
Eric,

Although I think you're wrong about what you said in your post, I enjoyed reading it. At least it was interesting. That's more than I can honestly say is true for most of what attempts to pass for brilliant commentary around here.

To (your Name)

I find it hard to believe that Mr Ellison really gives a (scatalogical euphemism) about what most of y'all think about much of anything. (Okay, he might be interested in reading what you think about HIM. This would be only natural. How could he *not* approve of the fact that y'all think he's amazing?)

But as regards the rest of it? He's going to be polite, because, for one thing, he grew up in the Mid-West, and for another good manners are good politics. And he's going to be kind of course, because he IS, and because you're his fans. After all. it's folks like y'all, who consume enormous amounts of his stuff, who keep him going financially. You encourage others to buy his stuff. You spread the good word about his good words. Chances are he sees all this as a needful,positive thing. That would just be intelligent. And H.E.'s hugely intelligent.


But do you really believe Mr Ellison spends any time AT ALL sitting around his beautiful home thinking things like, "H-m-m-m, let me go check in at Webderland to find out what (your name) thinks about thus-and-so?" If he really gave a (scatalogical euphemism) about what y'all thought about anything, don't you think he'd ASK you from time to time? I think he would. This is not a shy man. But so far, with all the reading I've done at this forum (a lot), never once have I come across a post wherein Mr E. made any requests for y'alls opinions.

He will occasionally tell you what HE thinks. He will offer prizes, music/book/author/movie suggestions, retorts and rebuttals, condolences, editorial corrections, thanks, (rare) apologies, information on appearance schedules, and requests for/offers of various items of interest for trade or sale. But nowhere ***NO*** where does he EVER post request for opinions from you people.

Don't you get it? Catch some CLUES. I know he's interesting, but he's not ***interested***. See?

Go. Get lives. Become interesting people. Maybe then, finally, he'll ask you what think about something. But take my word for it. It ain't going to happen for you today.

(Ed. note: The note on the first page of the main comments board also applies to this board as well, and is being acted on on all anonymous posts. Enjoy!)

Jesus H. Motherloving Scat-singing Christ
The failure of otherwise intelligent human beings to follow even the simplest guidelines for discourse never ceases to amaze me.

Rob, I consider your attack on Eric to be a slap in the face to both me and Harlan. I would suggest you find somewhere else to hang out until such time as you can converse with someone who disagrees with you without resorting to sophomoric name-calling and insult. At the minimum, please take a couple days off to chill. In the event you don't understand what I'm on about, e-mail me and I'll explain.

I'm giving Eric a pass on his double post and his return salvo since he was responding to your personal attack. I am disappointed that he felt it necessary to respond in kind, and I think he's as horribly wrong on the subject you were discussing as the rest of the last ten thousand or so people to declare the Death of Art, but I can't say I would have reacted any differently.

The rest of you who may be about to comment, don't. Go back to rightly discussing the greatness of Prokosch or vainly trying to portray A.I. as anything more than a poorly-conceived fairy tale misrepresentation of human nature.

>leading me to suspect you're the moron behind those "ghost of" posts

It's possible. But it's open to question, which is not the case with wondering who the moron is behind your posts, Rob.

Or perhaps that too is open to doubt. After all, unlike just about everyone else on the board, you've got very little to say about just who you are...no last name, no geographical info that I can remember, no biographical data ever offered...just "Rob." Even the probably fictitious Mrs. Meat has more backstory.

As for your "you are derivative, over-generalized, presumptive" over-latinized blather, surely you can be a bit more precise and effective in your objections, a la Mr. Wilder. Or did you really just want to waste your one precious post per day by declaring that my rectum has a larynx! You wouldn't be the first webdderlander to exhibit a fixation on things anal.

And since I've now violated that sacred ruling of the unipost, I will not return for TWO days, in the interests of Webderlandic balance...

Well, Eric, I guess we should just roll over die, huh? Everything's turned to ash and decay, so what's the point. All that cool culture stuff is worm food, or so you say.

Except... I still read novels and short stories, attend movies and screen them on DVD/VHS, and listen to hours of music every week. Am I engaging in necrophilia?

When I read my monthly issues of F&SF or Asimov's, and thrill to the fact that the plotted genre short story is thriving in those magazines, am I deluded? Since the Art Form he has worked, breathed and lived in since the 50's has expired, should Harlan Ellison hang it up, call it a day, retire, throw in the towel, sling up his spurs, turn in his firearms, pawn his Olympias, cash his check?

When I read and enjoy the latest Pynchon, Theroux, Atwood, Chabon, Vollmann, Rushdie, Lessing or Delillo, am I dancing on the corpse of "serious" fiction?

When I listen to latest nifty rock n' roll of Steve Malkmus, Yo La Tengo, White Stripes, Guided By Voices, The Sadies, Preston School of Industry, The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, am I being redundant? Are they? When I rocked out to Sleater-Kinney at The Majestic in Detroit, last Feb., was it the real, true spirit of Rock and Roll I felt, or just a transparency?

When I am entertained by "Six Feet Under," "The Sopranos," "The Wire," and "Sex in the City" on HBO, and feel they are better than anything that television has produced, and bode well for the future of the medium, am I further deluded?

And are all the poets, composers and comic book artists that aspire merely pissing up some useless knotted rope? Should they take said rope and wrap it around their necks and do the only thing left to do? I mean, if it's all pointless doo doo, why continue breathing?

Of course, I'm being rhetorical and you need not reply to all the question marks. At least not until tomorrow...

yours, in death, R.Wilder

ERIC,

"Criticism is a queer thing. If I print, "She was stark naked" and then proceed to describe her person in detail, what critic would not howl? Who would venture to leave the book on a parlor table? But the artist does this and all ages gather around and look and talk and point".
-Mark Twain

So marks the subjective confines of art, whether at a high or low in innovation. The little film which you spoke of does avoid Hollywood clichés and resolutely refuses to lead the audience down well-trodden paths. If it isn't art it walks a line close to being art by that virtue alone.

Considering how little you know about film or anything else your statements, while not entirely untrue, are derivative and hollow and overgeneralized, with nothing to contribute to the subject but self-indulgence and blind presumption. Which really often seems to be the case with you. You're not as skilled at being a wise-ass as you believe yourself to be (leading me to suspect you're the moron behind those "ghost of" posts; they SOUND like you, anyway - whether it's you or not). In fact, you're an insular dipshit, Eric. With the sole talent of talking straight out of your ass.

Well, Eric, I'm sad to see you've missed Jane Smily, T.C. Boyle and Amy Tan, among some other greats, make their debuts since the 60's. Try Boyle's "Water Music," or his short story collection "Greasy Lake," and tell me again that novels and short stories are played out.

And, for the Chomsky AND Zinn fans on the board (Frank, this one is for you), McSweeney's presents the unused C&Z commentary for "Fellowship of the Ring." Read with tongue inserted firmly in cheek:

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2003/04/22fellowship.html

> Is this what heroes are today? The hero's response is to start slaughtering the soldiers wholesale.<

What do you expect? It's a comic book movie. Two dying genres sandwiched together to make something truly atrocious. Yeah, I said dying. Every art form has a life-span. Here's the rundown:

Comics are done...they finished out in the 80s. The market for new ones is shrinking fast, and the market for old ones is growing--a sure sign that they are a "thing of the past."

Movies are done. The great century of film is over. When stalker crap like One Hour Photo gets heralded as art, the writing is on the wall, friends. Movies have become little more than semi-pornographic slideshows of celebrities. Rent an X-rated flick instead...cut to the chase, you'll be happier.

Novels--finished out in the 60s. People read the genre stuff now: thrillers, romances, historical bodice-rippers. Haven't had a "serious" novelist make it big since John Irving, who was not that good anyway.

Short stories--market died in the 70s. No one reads them anymore, largely because the magazines won't run them. That was the place for them, not in the sad little collections that rot on bookstore shelves.

Novella: never did reach it's peak. Unfortunately, has never found the right delivery method: too long for the rags, too short for publication. Serialization...ah, those were the days.

Painting. Died with Warhol and Rothko. What else could you do after that?

Poetry--lives on in pop music. Rock and roll is dead, finally, even though bands like U2 still have bills to pay. Pop now serves as vehicle for street poetry, most of it pretty terrible.

Orchestral music: Orchestras still playing the same shit from 300 years ago that they've always played. Modern composers have best chance with film scores, and the scores are now usually the most interesting parts of the movies.

TV: never lived up to its promise, but then, never really had any promise. Cheap theatre for the couch set, who prefer spying on their neighbors (reality shows) or crappy sitcoms that seem to gain credibility with age (Gilligan and Lucy now considered high art). Should hang on ad nauseum, since it's inexpensive, has a big reach, and most important of all is the prime seller of consumerism.

Dance: Riverdance. Apocalypse snooze.

Well, my "The Seven Who Fled" (yep, Jim, found a first myself, and in Canada, too!) is bought and shall find me in two weeks. As I emailed M. Loftus; Ellison was right about "Gravity's Rainbow". And, I will continue to complain about how expensive this site is for those who frequent it.

Bill: Read and reread your musings. I don't know what to say, except the uncertainty and self-doubt are part of all of us. The major difference is that you've found that rare ability and courage to actually put things down in a somewhat public place, essentially leaving yourself open to whatever criticisms that might be levied at you for not bearing the façade of perfection as you should.

Don't sweat it unduly, mon ami, you've merely got the same problems I and everyone else here does. The difference is that we resist the silence inherent in living the life of "quiet desperation"; we simply can't let the process of living drag us down without a fight, even if the war is simply to be able to say what's going on. I don't think you have much to be concerned about, except the possibility of deciding to fall silent, believing that there is reward in playing the game that society demands of all of us to perpetuate itself. Hell, I'm always more concerned for the millions (billions, more likely) who remain silent, folding their fears, anger and resentment at the frustration that is life until it is ultimately triggered. Time and again we're shown the consequences that play out when emotional critical mass is achieved.

Yep, my kids drive my up the wall, too, and I wouldn't change one moment of my existence with them. Mel said I'd be a good father, despite my resistance to the notion out of fear that I'd repeat the horrors my parents vistied upon me. The girl pegged it.
Now, if I can just figure out how Cassie beats me all the time at Candyland (I say she cheats), and why she watches "Whammy" to cheer for the red guy...

Darryl: Good to hear from you, and hope all's well in SF. I'll fire a call along to Mel, and you two can divine how the dream for the modern pop star is merely to reprocess the old. Weird, hearing M. Mathers sampling Aerosmith...

Waiting for someone to cover "New Song", from "Who Are You", is Scott

Three questions
Over the years, we’ve been fortunate to see a handful of Mr. Ellison’s screen- and teleplays – “City on the Edge of Forever,” “The Whimper of Whipped Dogs,” “Flintlock,” “The Harlan Ellison Movie,” and “I, Robot.” As others have mentioned, Mr. E’s scripts are often more detailed, more descriptive than the average screenplay and they make for some great reading. I wonder if there are any plans afoot to publish other HE scripts. I’d be particularly interested in seeing “Cutter’s World,” the Roger Corman project from the 80s. And while we’re at it, what is “Seven Worlds”?

Also, it occurs to me that over the years, Mr. E has given some interviews that are almost as memorable as some of the fiction. Even on the page, one gets a sense of the verve, the energy, the speed of the mind grabbing the query and racing with it. About 10, 15 years ago, University Press of Mississippi issued a series of collected interview books (“Conversations with Norman Mailer,” “Conversations with Flannery O’Connor,” etc.) Be terrific if someone gathered a dozen of Mr. E’s best published interviews and collected them for publication. I’m thinking about a long Q&A he did with Ed Bryant for the Bloomsbury Review, an interview that appeared in the old Armchair Detective, etc.

Finally: Can’t tell you how many times I’ve popped the cassette of “Loving Reminiscences of the Dying Gasp of the Pulp Era,” into the player and enjoyed a long drive. A fabulous personal history of a much neglected era and genre (though that may be changing, as anyone who has tried to purchase an old issue of “Manhunt” would tell you). Mr. E’s voice has a charming quality to it – one is pulled into the memories as if hearing them across a table in the back of Musso & Frank Grill. HE sputters when recalling the editor who stiffed him all those years ago, goes melancholic when recalling, say, Cornell Woolrich or Hans Stantesson. It’s really a marvelous “performance” and, I would argue, a significant historical document. I wonder if Mr. E has ever considered taping another such remembrance?

Chris L.,
I believe I had the same reaction to X2 as you did. In defense of the movie, I would say that I think Wolverine was the only good guy doing any of the killing. But, I think that's what the character would've done anyway, I mean, as you said, he's the best yadda yadda yadda. The ending was goofy and lame and I coulda thought of at least a dozen different ways to achieve the end result, but, hey, they gotta get to Dark Phoenix for the third movie somehow, I guess. (I wll say this, though, that Jackman and Marsden managed to convince me that they felt real emotion; probably the only real emotion in the movie.)

PAB,
David pretty much encapsulated what I thought of Secretary and its ending. Good, funny stuff. And, actually, probably more realistic than any recent Hollywood romantic comedy.

***BILL***

No one's got the answers, man. Do what you think you need to do and understand every action has a reaction. If you can live with the reaction, then do what you think you need to do. And be damned sure the little one knows it ain't her fault no matter what happens.

Stuff
Chris L wrote:
"X-MEN 2: Better than the first despite a badly mistimed ending which didn't get the slightest emotional reaction from Jean Grey's perfunctory death scene (oops sorry I spoiled it for y'all - those of you who never read an X-Men book.)"

That'd be _me_.

Anyway, re Shitty Fantasy Writers. Friends of mine were huge Xanth fans in high school, so I picked up a three-book omnibus and read it. Not bad, I thought, but kind of... flavorless. I couldn't tell the difference between him and the other writers my friends were raving about, like Robert Asprin. Finally decided that my friends were just fantasy fans without much taste.

Yesterday, I stopped by the local diner to have lunch. There's a waitperson there who likes to read, and we chat about books'n'stuff. He asks me what my new book is, and I tell him: Prokosch's _The Seven who Fled_. I ask him what he's reading, and he says he's reading the second _Sword of Shannara_ book by Terry Brooks.

Suddenly I hear myself saying, "Jesus Christ, why are you wasting your time reading shit like that? Anyone can rewrite Tolkien, for Crisesakes. I read that in high school, and I kept thinking that this guy kept misspelling "Aragorn" and "Gandalf." You oughta read somebody really _good_." Then I named names.

Happily, there's a good used bookstore next door.

TIMEWARP WEIRDNESS: I have become addicted to watching the Game Show's "Black and White Overnight" to while away my insoniac hours and I'm particularly hooked on What's My Line? (was there ever a better host than John Daly?) and To Tell the Truth.

On last night's To Tell The Truth, the guest was a gentleman named Wendell Fertig who I admit I had never heard of before. He wound up leading a group of Fillipino soldiers in a prolonged guerilla campaign to resist the Japanese. Very Lawrence of Arabia kinda stuff. As an enterprising not-so-young man, I think "This would make a great movie."

The next morning, I go to the library and do some research and within thirty seconds, I find out that Fertig's story is going to be David Fincher's next project, starring Brad Pitt.

Now what the hell are the chances of that? I watch a 40 year old TV show, grab an idea from it and it is just now - I mean just NOW - being done by Hollywood. Dammit, that's annoying!

Anyway, if you're interested in Fertig's story, I am told that _They Fought Alone_ by Keats is a good acount of his adventures. Or you can just wait for the movie. Which won't be made by me. Dammit. I get 40 years and wind up 1 year late. *sigh*

PIERS ANTHONY: I was a voracious reader of Mr. Anthony's works in my teenage years. He's the first author for whom I ever chose to comb the shelves of used bookstores. Up to a certain point, I had read EVERY BOOK Anthony ever had published except for the obscure Kiai! martial arts series which wasn't available in the U.S. I loved the Tarot books too.

But recently, I went back and started to read _On A Pale Horse_ which memory told me was one of the finer fantasies I had ever read and I must admit that it did not hold the same appeal for me. A bit... well, simply written. Which isn't an insult, mind you, but not at all what I remembered.

I still have a whole box full of Anthony's books and I'll always think fondly of his work but I haven't read anything by him in years and I don't know if I will.

X-MEN 2: Better than the first despite a badly mistimed ending which didn't get the slightest emotional reaction from Jean Grey's perfunctory death scene (oops sorry I spoiled it for y'all - those of you who never read an X-Men book.) Felt like a few key shots got left on the cutting room floor as we lost track of characters who suddenly reappeared at what seemed like random moments. Still, nice job with Nightcrawler and Hugh Jackman handles the role of Logan admirably.

But watching the movie, I couldn't help but think: Is this what heroes are today? In the government's assult on the X-Mansion, soldiers invade and use stun darts to incapacitate the children. These are soldiers doing their job and using non-lethal means. The hero's response is to start slaughtering the soldiers wholesale.

I dare say the good guys kill far more people in this movie than the bad guys do (though Magneto tries to kill everyone) and, especially in the light of the Daredevil movie where he apparently kills his victims, is this out new view of the so-called hero? I know it's Wolverine - that's what Wolverine does and he's the best at what he does but... still felt weird. Am I too sentimental to pine away for the days of a square-jawed, apple-pie swillin' George Reeves?

For those seeking "The Seven Who Fled"--by online catalog search it is available to those in the Los Angeles area through the Los Angeles Public Library system (not to be confused with the Los Angeles County Library system). Holds may be placed online, and books picked up at your local branch.

Just finished reading Piers Anthony's "Tarot." Ugh. Not fond of it. Anthony's one author that I really enjoyed as a youngster, but now find somewhat repetitious. Most of his books seem to involve the protagonist standing around pondering creative way to solve puzzles for so long, the whole plot grinds to a standstill...

I left something a little less cryptic at my site about my recent happenings. Not too precise, but, well, anyone with imagination, anyone who was wondering (not expecting many, to be honest), can check it out at http://www.geocities.com/gauthic2001/Musings.html.

This has been a sad, strange day. Continue on...

Bill

HARLAN:

How did the laser "window cleaning" of your intra-ocular implant go? (I had the same procedure back in '97) Does the lovely Susan look even lovelier now?

Forrester

Wowza
Alla this talk about literature. What joy have I wrought with a curious question?

Anyway, my copy turned up today. It seems a certain somebody laid hands on a copy of said tome (dare I mention, so proudly, it be a first edition?), along with a floor-to-ceiling, free-standing oak bookcase with four shelves and glass doors, each with a lock on it, so I can display but protect my literary prides and joys, which include but are not limited to efforts by Harlan Ellison, Dan Simmons, Isaac Asimov, Preston Sturges, William Faulkner, Edward Abbey, Rudyard Kipling, T.E. Lawrence, and Helen Bannerman.

Bliss.

Until next time. . .

Melissa, I've recently had similar experiences, showing my boys how I know the words to all these "new" songs they are hearing on the radio...

Hope you and Scott, et al. are well.

On the subject of "The Seven Who Fled", Scotty called me, asking if I'd use my one post to tell all to go to www.abebooks.com, and run a search from either the title or the author. There's a fair number of copies, at various editions available, some of them quite affordable.

Shameful of that husband to use me like this. Now to return and prove to a small child that there was a version of "Lady Marmalade" that was far better than the Pink/Aguilera cover.

Love to all, Melissa

Harlan's Book Circle
I'm lucky: the U. of Penn Library had a _heap_ of Prokosch, so I checked out one of their many copies of _The Seven who Fled_ and _The Asiatics_.

Prokosch books
I would like to throw my hat into the ring of people looking for any of these books. I'm always looking to get my ignorance in check, and this might be a good way to chip away at it. I'd be willing to buy or trade. I'm open. Any help would be great since my city has very few (if any) good used book stores and our main library system is in upheaval while the new Central branch is being renovated.

I read SANTA CLAUS vs. S.P.I.D.E.R. yesterday and I enjoyed it quite a lot. Working on the other stories in THE BEAST THAT SHOUTED... as well as the HORNBOOK. Anyone else read multiple books at once?

Thanks,
Tony

David,

If you're willing to wait a few days until I finish the book, I would be happy to lend you my copy of "The Seven Who Fled."

Oh, and in the interests of whoring mine own and other, better work, I'd like to note that the new issue of Bookslut is up at Bookslut.com. I've meanderings about the new Science Fiction Experience and I've started a column on book cover design (no reviews for me this month, sadly) but there is something for everyone one there. Just a book zine I'm very proud to be a part of.

Regards,
Joseph

Prokosch
Not wishing to start a feeding frenzy here but there is currently a copy of Prokosch’s “The Asiatics” up for action at Ebay. No reserve. Starting price of 10 cents. Auction ends tomorrow (Wed., 5/7).

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3517421289&category=269

THE ONE IRWIN ALLEN MISSED...

Since you were all talkin' about it I thought I'd jump into the conversation. I was listening to and reading about details covered in the new book, Krakatoa: The Day the World Exploded: August 27, 1883.

I convulsed admitting my ignorance (where the hell was I during all this????) about the events surrounding what was probably the most powerful volcanic eruption in the Earth's history (certainly in Man's history). I say with no exaggeration the facts utterly blew my mind:

A tsunami (one of three I believe I heard author Simon Winchester report on NPR) towered 160 feet (I had nightmares about shit like that when I was a kid), moving in at an unimaginable rate of...900mph! Now...let's really understand what that means: the speed of sound is 661mph! All I can add is I didn't think that was possible for a mass so great (my ignorance about tsunamis doesn't help. I'm an easterner, whatya want?).

The sound of the eruption was heard 3000 miles away! This means populations heard the event 4.5 hours after it actually happened. Many mistook it for cannon-fire in the distance.

Its red glow illuminating the horizon could be seen from regions just as distant. In Poughkeepsie, NY fire stations thought they'd spotted a local fire (5 miles away or so) and they headed for it boldly only to find their towns intact.

Dust swirled round the world for years, causing temperatures to plummet.

Even major deadly political events spiralled from this disaster.

This staggering handful of basic facts added to my personal list of accounts I once thought could only be possible in an Irwin Allen schlock saga.

Yeah, this is something I just had to lie back on the couch and talk about. Give me a good medication and I'll be fine.

JUSTIN: I dunno from David, but get me one, book monkey!

I just got my copy of the HORNBOOK back from my father, a well-read and erudite man. He could barely express to me how much he enjoyed it. Similarly, after reading my copies of THE BEAST WHO SHOUTED LOVE AT THE HEART OF THE WORLD and THE GLASS TEAT, a young lady at the store next to the comic book shop spent about five minutes trying to tell me of her new-found love for our patron, using such phrases as: "I...he....oh, man...I wish I could...wow, he just...." and so forth. Spreading the gospel, ayyyyy-men!

Meanwhile, I am unsure of the pathology of Internet viruses, but I seem to have caught the Martian flu. Oy.

best,
Michael

David- I'm going to Tucson tomorrow and they have a number of really top-notch used bookstores. I've never had a problem finding what I'm looking for (barring some Gerald Kersh stuff). If I find a few copies of THE SEVEN WHO FLED do you want me to pick one up for you?

DAVID: I recommend ALL of them, each and every one, absolutely unreservedly. Prokosch is Olympian. But you might start with THE ASIATICS, his first novel, published before THE SEVEN WHO FLED: it is superlative. I think ANY preliminary exposure to Prokosch will make an addict of you. I must have given away two hundred copies of THE SEVEN WHO FLED over the past twenty years. No matter what edition, when I spot one in a used bookstore, I buy it. Because I know there will be someone coming along in my life whose raised joy will become a concern of mine; and Prokosch is often what I use to accomplish that simple act of kindness.

Yr. pal, Harlan

Prokosch, mainly
Hey, you guys -- where are you finding your copies of _The Seven Who Fled_ (other than Alibris, I mean)?

I checked my local libraries and none of them had a copy. They DO have copies of some other Prokosch books: _A Tale for Midnight_, _The Wreck of the Cassandra_, _The Dark Dancer_, _The Asiatics_, _The Idols of the Cove_, _The Missolonghi Manuscript_, even a memoir entitled _Voices_ and two books of poems!

Can you recommend any of these others, Harlan? Can anyone else?

PAB: I enjoyed "Secretary" tremendously, particularly Gyllenhaal's honest and fearless acting. I think the "rampant silliness" of the conclusion was part and parcel of the "perfect, warped fantasy" of the rest of it. I mean, how else could they have ended it except with some grubby tragedy that would have left every viewer feeling godawful? The over-the-top satire of the ending was rather sweet, I thought. After all, we didn't demand "realism" of a thousand other movies we love, from "The Wizard of Oz" to "Rocky". . . .

Pratfalls and Other Stuff: Humour, Intentional and Otherwise

M. Ellison: Yes, it took a minute to wipe the egg off my face, but it's not going to be the last mistake I ever make. I just hope that, when the final mistake comes along, the fates give me the few moments of time and cogency enough to appreciate its enormity.

As for M. Ellison and M. Scorcese working together, why not? Seems to me both that innate love for film that makes for the work being done for love, not money. If it were up to me, I'd love to just sit silent and listen to these two discuss their favourites. Probably just a jaw-dropping good time, akin to listening to two great musicians jamming.

Brian: I wasn't that enamoured of Hendra's book, but it did have its moments. There was some quite good writing in the first eight or so chapters (I applaud his mention of Feiffer, James Gregory, R. Crumb, somehow often overlooked). The problem for me became reading of the Lampoon, with Hendra's proximity to the magazine colouring his judgement, making the last half of the book an ode to the magazine. It is fair that National Lampoon should be discussed, but coming to the point where we get a discussion of Hendra's place in a workplace melange a trois is a bit much.

I do agree with his take on SNL, especially contrasted by his discussion of the Committee, and Hendra's recollection of the LBJ sketch (Hendra should've pointed out that the feelings toward Johnson were the same in American society in general as manifested in that sketch, but the response of the general populace was to elect a vermin far more dangerous. That is pure satire.). Yes, by the late seventies, the product of satire was truly watered down and co-opted.

Scott

Over at the New yorker site, there's a review of a new book about the satirical comedians of the 1950's and 1960's. It's at http://www.newyorker.com/printable/?critics/030512crbo_books

Lots of things wrong, both with the book and the review. The book apparently limits itself to standup comedians, excluding such exemplars of sature as _Catch-22_ and _Dr. Strangelove_, and even exclude George Carlin and Robert Klein for specious reasons. I had a nice moment catching the _New Yorker's_ fabled fact-checkers in a gaffe, when Gopnik claims that the song "Love Me, I'm a Liberal," was written by Tom Lehrer.

But the reviewer seems to suffer from a disease common to New York liberal intellectuals. It's the continual desire to present insights which set them apart as independent thinkers-- but it's merely independence from their immediate social circle, i.e., other New York liberal intellectuals. As a result, this search for novelty and "individuality" usually turns into a grudging admission of conservatism. So Gopnik labors mightily to show that the genuinely radical satire "boom" of the 1950s and 1960s gave rise to Reagan. (The nice thing about this disease is that, when it hits _conservative_ New York intellectuals, they suddenly rediscover John Maynard Keynes-- or say nice things about Al Sharpton.)

But if you want to find a _good_ book about the rise and demise of satire, read Tony Hendra's _Going Too Far_.

JOHN K: Scorcese and Harlan? I dunno. Scorcese has both a mania and a neurotic flittiness to his voice I don't associate with Harlan. Okay; maybe if you crossed Harlan with Woody Allen.

By the by: Has anyone seen GOODFELLAS on commercial broadcast TV? The other night, after the Phillies game, GOODFELLAS was scheduled as the feature film on one of our local channels. It started with a long intro by Scorcese, in which he pointed out that while it had been sanitized a bit for TV, violence was very much a part of the lives followed in this true story, and that a lot of violence was still in. He went on to talk about how it portrayed a "family" of gangsters made up of many different ethnic groups and that no one was to be seen as being singled out, how these people were NOT to be seen as role models, or "heroes" ...

All in all, a very weird pre-apologia.

(I'm still looking forward to his film or series of films, a la a Ken Burns thing, on the Blues.
[It IS the Year of the Blues, after all ...])

Rick,

sorry I posted twice Sunday. I didn't realize at the time what I was doing. Please accept my mea culpa and know that my self-flagellation will be extensive and vicious.

This board is movie central. I saw X2: X-MEN UNITED and found it fun but too busy. SECRETARY was interesting. I loved the performances. I also disliked the scene you mention, but saw it as a logical step, seeing as the movie, marketed as a kinky drama, was really a romantic comedy in s&m garb.

Speaking of films, I watched an AFI documentary on Martin Scorcese tonight. I'm almost 100% positive someone brought this up before, but holy shit, he sounds really similar to Harlan Ellison. There's an ellisonian quality to the voice, and he seems to share Ellison's energy, erudition, and commitment to his personal vision.

I don't know if the two have ever met, but don't you think they'd get along?

rich: Thanks for mentioning SECRETARY. I meant to bring it up here a while ago and never did. I really enjoyed it until

SPOILER SPACE

Lee refuses to get up from the desk and the press gets involved. It becomes a media circus, which really strained my willing suspension of disbelief. It came damn near to a perfect, warped fantasy, with excellent performances by Maggie Gyllenhall and James Spader, except for that rampant silliness at the end.

Anyone else seen it and care to comment?

PAB

MELISSA & SCOTTY: Picture me with a wide, completely endearing grin splitting my phizz.

--he

Mr. Ellison:

I immediately drew Scotty's attention to your response. I wish you could've heard the roar of laughter at the other end of the phone. After checking, the husband said, "Correct, and how in the hell did I miss something so obvious?".

Yes, I do take some pleasure in when my man attempts erudition, only to wind up flat on his face; the trick is knowing just how much salt to throw on the male ego's wound. At least he takes embarassment at his mistakes well. Honestly, he did graduate both high school and university, getting good grades. And, he is helpful around the house.

Scotty will be better tomorrow.

Love to all, Melissa

My day was going pretty decently until I saw the rave on the cover for the newest issue of TIME magazine.

SARS: HOW SCARED SHOULD YOU BE?

Um...okay. Is there some sort of demographic? Is there an actual statistic in existence that would correctly show how scared I'm supposed to be? Am I too scared? Scared enough? Or maybe I should be a little more scared?

It's the end of the day for me. Maybe I'm not thinking clearly. Or maybe I'm just sick of boogeymen, thanks anyway, TIME.

Ah well. At least I saw X-MEN II yesterday. Marvellous entertainment, truly worthy of an 'Excelsior'! (Thank you, Stan). All the actors pulled their characters off nicely. Mystique and Magneto were particularly noteworthy, their very strides fused with an odious, loathsome arrogance. One image burned into my brain was that of Wolverine screaming in indescribable agony in one of his flashbacks, his newly-implanted adamantium claws causing blood to gush forth from his knuckles in relentless torrents. Ouchie.

Let's pray that THE HULK follows suit...

So I've been reading "The Seven Who Fled" the past week or so, and Harlan's mentioning of this novel prompted me to share a thought I has while reading it. This is the kind of novel where you need to really pay attention to every sentence; there's so much wonderful introspection and circumstance that if you try to read it fast, you're going to miss a lot of the best stuff. I'm on the second section right now, and I'm really getting into this fantastic novel (strangely, I'm drawing comparisons with the new T.C. Boyle, "Drop City," which has scenes in the dead of Alaskan winter that remind me of "The Seven" in interesting ways).

Oh, and you can find the novel at Alibris.com for very reasonable prices. I just wish mine had come with a dust jacket.

Soft Monkeys and Wire Moms
Rob's comments, re the Robin Williams character in _One Hour Photo_, prompted me to share the following witchyall:

BTW, I read a really ghastly book over the weekend. _Love at Goon Lake_ tells the story of Harry Harlow, whose experiments on mother-love pretty much redefined how we see things like child-rearing, love, and intelligence.

The book is _wonderfully_ ghastly. There's the stance of the psychological establishment before Harlow's work, which was that mothers shouldn't be overprotective and should try to keep the little buggers at a safe, cold distance. There's Harlow's experiments with the "cloth mother" where baby monkeys fixated on a cloth-and-light-bulb construct for mother-comfort; and later, Harlow expanded the experiments to include "wire mothers" (no comfort, but they gave milk, but the monkeys wouldn't cuddle with them) and "evil mothers," i.e., cloth mothers that beat the crap out of any baby monkeys who tried to cuddle (and the babies would try _desperately_ to cuddle with them, because, after all, it was Mom).

Then there was the time Harlow had soem monkeys that had been, well, made psychotic after prolonged isolation. He managed to get some of these emotionally-barren females pregnant (using a device he later called a "rape rack") to see if they developed any maternal love. Nope: turns out, the babies who were ignored were the _lucky_ ones. (One of the psychotic mothers actually crushed her baby's head in her mouth.)

And then there was the Pit of Despair: an inverted pyramid where monkeys were placed. They were unable to climb out, and within two days they learned that the effort was futile, so they simply huddled in a trembling ball at the bottom. This was to examine the phenomenon of depression.

Oh, there's no end of hilarity here; I really _was_ laughing, simply because the experiments were _so_ ghastly, but extremely profound. Simply put, if Harlow hadn't done such good research on mother-love and despair, the animal-rights activists wouldn't have a solid reason to _object_ to his experiments in the first place.

MR. REESTON, Sir:

Far be it from me to suggest that your question is among the dopier I've had this season, but YOU tell ME: "On the Downhill Side" was written in 1971, published in 1972. A CONFEDERACY OF DUNCES was published in 1980. Prior to that, it lay dusty and unknown in a trunk that had belonged to John Gregory Toole before he died. So, exactly how much influence d'ya THINK a story published eight years prior to the later novel had on me?

Wishing people would do just a TEENSY bit'o'checkin' before they
casually ask me any old thing that comes flitting into their heads, and meaning no great disrespect, I remain, wearily (but still yr. pal), Harlan

Something About Ignatius Reilly...

M. Ellison:

Currently re-reading "A Confederacy of Dunces", and am curious to ask if Toole's novel influenced your writing of "On the Downhill Side". Yes, yours seemed perhaps a bit bleaker than Toole's insanely funny take on the paradox that is New Orleans, but the two of you seemed to capture the atmosphere of the town and its denizens.

Enjoying a julep in the Night of Joy, Scott

Bartering
“I haven't heard from Tom Pynchon in a few years. But that's not unusual. Remind me sometime to tell you about the evening I never met him, at which I apparently met him.” I am salivating, Mr. E. I am drooling like Zsa Zsa before an exiled prince. I know Mr. P desires his privacy. And I know that his pals divulge little. But the notion of two of my favorite writers meeting (or, is it NOT meeting) is a story I’d give THIS arm and THAT leg to hear. What can I offer to loosen the tongue? A lost Gerald Kersh manuscript? Some stolen Django Reinhardt master tapes? A lifetime supply of Hydrox, perhaps?

>another film that used environment organically<

Oh um yeah. One Hour Photo sucked, and no amount of bullshit is going to hide that fact.

Christ, I thought we sprayed for film bores last week...

For Bill
BILL: If you need a sounding board, or someone to talk to:

505.242.2984

Any old time.

Best to all,
Michael

Rich,

Your comments suggest to me you'd walked into the theater with clear expectations about OHP. Possibly that it was supposed to have the power of a thriller. They also remind me of responses people had to EYES WIDE SHUT, another film that used environment organically - reflecting the psychological world of the main character. And they suggest to me, in your expectations, you missed the whole point of the film. Sometimes it benefits a viewer to revisit a film; you accept it on its own terms, not your own, and its goals become clear and acceptable...perhaps even redeeming. I experienced the film almost strictly as a meditation, all its components harmonized. I enjoyed its subjective quietness.

I really don't know what you mean by "the film doesn't deliver". If trivialities like having a key after being fired created impediments for you I can't see much validity in your criticism. For one, it's EASY to have a key after being fired - especially if you'd been working there for many years in a supervisory capacity (he'd trained other employees coming in). Hell, it's HAPPENED. That's nothing.

As for "squirming", wondering about his voyeuristic exploits was enough for me. What was to follow would provide us with the information we'd need to understand the kind of trap his mind was in. Is he a potential child molester or was HE in fact a child in a man's body, deprived of things human beings need to be complete entering their adult years? He NEEDED a family; something he probably could never really have. Thus, contrary to your statement, when he forced the couple to have sex it DID fall in line with character because that's what was inside him; he was reliving events. At first, earlier in the film, I suspected he'd been sexually molested as a child (which is why I WAS squirming when he was around the kid, given the stats with molesters and their own history of being abused); THEN I suspected it was more his MOTHER he'd seen abused by his dad. That's what he was reliving when he manipulated that couple. This was deliberately left ambiguous, leaving scattered hints in his dialogue. I'd noted, for instance, he'd talked about his mother - quite fondly - but made NO reference to his father. NONE. As though he'd never HAD one. And, of course, there is the revelation in the interrogation at the end (something like, "watching people made to do terrible things" with a contorted expression of pain and disgust on his face). Then he went back to the constructs of the only world he had when the cop handed him the photos.

This was a character study, not a suspense thriller (which I believe you understand). It mainly set its own rules in exposition, with a leisurely pace that I enjoyed. It's the exploration of an internalized world; the delicate lines Sy would or would not cross would guide as to who he was and what had happened to him in his upbringing, in lieu of clear explanations.

Often the appearance of "truth" brushes aside our efforts to contemplate form or analyze the visual rhetoric of a film. We walk in tied to conventions, with conditioned expectations...and we feel the film let us down. Consider SOME of my suggestions and give the film another chance sometime, taking it in on its OWN terms. You might find things in it you didn't see before. Maybe you WON'T. All I can tell you is, given the preceding and my first post on the film, it worked for ME for these reasons. It was a meditation for me not a suspense showcase.

I make posts like yesterday's with a rapidly beating heart. I don't want to sound like a fanboy, on the same token, I'd like to know if I've touched someone in a positive light. And I don't want to let you all think I'm some floundering sould who would look for these things, like the types who read those godawful CHICKEN POOP FOR THE SOUL books. Yuchh. It's just that it's a rare occurance when a person can find something that changes them for the positive (in most cases) and, more importantly, reawakens them to the outside world.

As a writer, it also sets a bar. The bar is set by the "classics" and the modern writers come around and reach the bar or move it or change the game or something, and it's rare that one can meet/speak/read a living writer who has set the bar so high both in terms of storytelling and the meaning behind the stories. That's why I keep returning to the stories. That's why I keep returning to the boards. I aspire to reach that bar, suspect I never will, but try nonetheless.

This weekend, I came across a discussion board on Orson Scott Card's website where someone listed links to a bunch of stories from around the net and my story "Snow Day" (available in the archives of www.ideomancer.com) and there was a discussion about the story. It was a mixed discussion, at best, some liking it, some not, but that's not the point. The point was they DISCUSSED it a little. I won't have a plethora of readers anytime soon, but it still felt pretty cool. I can take all the credit, or I can say I was helped along the way by the books and stories I've read.

Anyway, I've got stuff to do. Thanks for listening.

Tryinna deal with it,
Bill

Harlan,
Thanks for the acknowledgement, though. No offense taken.


Rob,
I wrote this whole treatise on One Hour Photo and my problems with it and realized it's a fucking chapter in a book. No one wants to read that so I thought I'd try to encapsulate.

Bottomline: I loved the fantasy aspects of the film and the look of the film from Sy's POV, but the film didn't stay true to itself in this regard. Too many "convenient" parts of the film stopped it dead in its tracks for me (getting fired and still having access to the lab and the keys for the knife case, for example).

It's like it wanted to be a Taxi Driver kind of movie except it didn't have DeNiro taking Cybil Shephard to a porno flick. The closest One Hour Photo came to fulfilling its promise was the scene where Sy meets the kid in the park (or forest or something; the kid's pushing his bike and Sy gives him a gift). Quite frankly, there weren't enough squirming moments that this flick needed. And, Sy's approach to solving the infidelity by forcing the husband and mistress to pretend to have sex seemed to be a bit out of character for him. I would of thought that he would've stayed on the sidelines. (However, I do see the point where he thought he had to act since the wife wasn't, but I still think it was a bit of a stretch.) Either way, I think it was one movie for the first act or so and then was a different movie the last act.

Anyway, the film didn't work for me.

A film that did is Secretary. I missed it when it came out and rented it the other day and the wife and I both enjoyed it, but she told me to shut up when I started in on how it was a satire on so-called "Hollywood-type" romantic comedies. So I shut up. And then put my palms on the desk and my feet on the floor and I did not move.

HARLAN: Thanks for the reply. Eventually, the section of academia devoted to editing and textual issues will almost certainly delight in all your variants -- or at least try to chart and catalog]codify them.

Cheers, Jon

Wow, great news that HERC sells some of the books of essays. I've wanted for a long time to get my hands on a copy of HARLAN ELLISON'S WATCHING. Can I do that through the collection? Regardless, I'll send out my SASE.

I thought you had a very interesting post, Bill. The idea of literature as practical, as something you can use, is an intriguing one.

I guess I feel both ways. On the one hand, I don't think that Ellison's fiction wasn intended to help us through complex decisions. His stories don't contain pat morals and aren't ethical primers. Nor should they be.

But, like all good literature, the stories grapple with the world, and part of that grappling is moral and ethical. And, perhaps more so than a lot of writing, Ellison's has a feeling of immediacy and--gosh, I hate to write "importance," because I don't mean to imply that it's super-serious or lacking in humor, because that certainly isn't the case, but there is a sense, behind the words, that what is taking place really matters.

Sorry, Bill. Didn't mean to lecture at you. What I meant to say was I know whatcha mean. And me too.

MARK: We sell most of my books of essays; particularly the ones "out of print." Go either to the bookstore link that Rick has put in here somewhere, or send a stamped, self-addressed envelope to:

The Harlan Ellison Recording Collection (HERC)
Post Office Box 55548
Sherman Oaks, California 91413-0548

And Susan will send you the latest book list. And probably a past issue of The Rabbit Hole, the "newsletter" of HERC, free of charge.

It's as easy as that. Mint condition books, personally autographed if you desire such defacement. Why pay exorbitant prices to usurious dealers?

This posting has been brought to you by the Let's Keep Ellison From Having to Write Awful Television Crap division of The Kilimanjaro Corporation ("Better living through better writing.")

RICH: Sorry I can't accomodate you with an answer to your re-entered query, but it is one I choose not to deal with here. You asked it twice, so I'll proffer the courtesy of a reply; usually, my silence on a query means I'm giving it a pass. No offense, but the reply is no, I choose not to speak to that topic. Sorry, kiddo.

Respectfully, Harlan Ellison

Essays
Hello everybody(And Harlan). I have a question. I am a major fan of Harlan Ellison, and I was wondering if there are any collections of the essays that are not out of print.

Mr. Ellison: Thank you. She-Who-Must-Be-Obeyed thanks you, since she was actually the one who wanted the name of the book and the writer (this while she was sitting on my chest, knee deep in my groin).

But I digress. Many thanks. Even though I still owe you on a debt that never can be paid off by way of a certain writing workshop, let's call this situation, at least, four square even: I referenced your wonderful story "Goodbye to All That" in an article I just penned and published on the short story. Not that this should be a trade-off or whatever, but, well, it works out so nice and neat--why not?

See folks? This is how this space oughta work: Youse axed da man a question, he replies, you say 'thank you' and throw a sacrifical virgin onto the altar of Art as due.

Until next time. . .

Flipping Eagles the Bird...

Jesus, what a rush to get my hands on the stick and pedals of a glider, even though the instructor has an override. Christ, I'd never expected what I'd got, that combination of terror and elation that one gets at trying an entirely new experience. And, it was actually easier to stick and rudder than I'd thought it would be. Got back to earth, admiring the sweat stains all over my clothes, realizing that the adrenal rush, and the sights and feels of hunting down updrafts to stay aloft took over everything, erasing my attentions to all else. My instructor laughed, telling me how often he'd seen it in other students. If you ever get the chance, take it.

Lynn: You're dealing with a functional illiterate when it comes to computer programming, and one who is still somewhat nescient when it comes to the internet. I guess I get as much as I want from the technology, and don't ask more. Thanks for the info, and I'll feel a bit better about suggesting a change to the board knowing it's not going to drive the soul repsonsible into a house, be it one for the poor or the mad. Of course, my lack of knowlege will probably keep my mouth shut in any case.

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt." -- Mark Twain

Bill: Succinctly, well put. There's been a few moments where I'd been reading some story or essay of Ellison's at a time of personal duress, and at least gotten a bit of a different perspective.

Well, enough for me. Gone.

Scott

On Ellison:

"I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream" For awhile, years ago, I'd had a recurring dream, a nightmare, where I was screaming with all my might, and yet I couldn't make a sound, so that title struck a chord when I came across it. Same as Sam Kinison struck a chord, what with him screaming the way he did, just like I've so often felt like screaming, but couldn't ever seem to get anyone to hear me. Same as Allen Ginsberg's howlings struck a chord.

My mom says I was born mad. She says I came out screaming, furious, and sorely pissed. She's had nine children, and been by at the births of many more. She says she's never seen an angrier baby. I don't know about that because naturally I can't remember, but I guess I can understand going to sleep angry, and waking up angrier still. I can't say I do that everyday, I'm not mad ALL the time, but there's enough about this world, and the way people do things sometimes to give plenty of fuel for outrage if you're a hot natured person anyway.


(The I Ching says:

"Things that accord in tone vibrate together. Things that have affinity in their inmost natures seek one another. Water flows to what is wet, fire turns to what is dry. Clouds (the breath of heaven) follow the dragon, wind (the breath of earth) follows the tiger." "What is born of heaven feels related to what is above. What is born of earth feels related to what is below. Each follows its kind." {from Hexagram 1, line 5}

"Nine in the second place means:
A crane calling in the shade.
Its young answers it.
I have a good goblet.
I will share it with you.

This refers to the involuntary influence of a man's inner being upon persons of kindred spirit. The crane need not show itself on a high hill. It may be quite hidden when it sounds its call; yet its young will hear its call, will recognize it and give answer. Where there is a joyous mood, there a comrade will appear to share a glass of wine.

This is the echo awakened in men through spiritual attraction. Whenever a feeling is voiced with truth and frankness, whenever a deed is the clear expression of sentiment, a mysterious and far-reaching influence is exerted...."

"The superior man abides in his room. If his words are well spoken, he meets with assent at a distance of more than a thousand miles. How much more then from near by!" {from Hexagram 61, line 2})

Calling outrage "passion" doesn't deify it, it defines it. I'd say it's more rather just another aspect of a generally ardent nature.

Harlan,
If I might impose a question posted earlier:

The question is this: As a screenwriter, how much input will you allow from an outside source in regards to the way in which the screenplay is written? I mean, I was listening to Soderbergh and Gaghan's commentary for Traffic the other night and it struck me that their's was very much a collaborative effort in regards to structure and some of the scenes. We've all heard the horror stories of screenplays being abused by hacks, but at what point does the screenwriter allow him or herself to welcome the input from a director or another writer or producer? (And it's not always the case with Soderbergh--not a hack--who does his commentaries with the writer. Check out the commentary on The Limey and you'll hear that Dobbs wasn't too keen on some of the changes Soderbergh made to what was written.) Maybe this is all relative and the answer is "It depends on who you're working with", but have you every found yourself in a situation where you welcomed input from a director or producer and you thought their input made the end result better?

Waiting for the Veracious One, sincerely, Seeker of Truth.

What I love about Harlan Ellison's work is that, with the volume of material he has written, there HAS to be something that will help a person through any situation. Almost every story is a crossroads story, much more so than other writers' works. Too often (I see this in my own work much to my own dismay) a story seems written just to be written, with no real moral--scratch that, ETHICAL--view. All my favorite Harlan Ellison (R) stories have characters--good, bad, indifferent--at some moment where their lives change. Either from an outside force making them need the change, or from their own inner desires.

No shit, right? Isn't that what all stories do? I dunno. What I do know is that the past five years or so have been extremely difficult for me and first gleamed Harlan's work right before things went topsy-turvy. I'd always been a guy like Plastic Man before then, changing to suit those around me, or so that the status quo remains. Within a year after reading his work, I left college. I used the upcoming birth of my daughter as the reason but it was really because I didn't like the college. In 2000 I got married. I made a mistake there by not saying "NO" loud enough. I found out about my Crohn's Disease shortly thereafter. I've spent five years in a sort of haze, moving through life, trying my best to push and be determined to write, to be determined to live my life the way I want to live it (the ol' story about the guy who loved pancakes...). I decided last year to return to college and I have. I'm a week away from the end of my first semester in five years. I'm doing well but haven't lost any of the spunk that I've taken from Harlan Ellison (R) stories.

And then, this Wednesday, something happened. I can't say what. Or I won't. But something that left me wrecked the next day. My usual sounding board is off on his pre-marriage honeymoon so I've had no one to talk to. Can't go to my parents about this, can't go to the wife about it (hell no, I can't, CERTAINLY not her because it concerns her, though she must know what I've been thinking...). I have another friend I could talk to--and may--but considering it concerns her in some way (no, not like THAT, you pigs) I don't know if I should.

So what's a guy to do when he's come to a life-altering decision that has more basis in fantasy, longing, and insanity then in reality. Shit, I'm going to crack open a Harlan Ellison (R) and find out. Because whether it's a story or an essay, warts and all (and I do realize, despite the (R), that there's a real person behind the stories, I'm not placing anyone on a pedestal, I'm simply saying why the work is some of my favorite), the characters and people come off as real, and they make their decisions--good or bad--and live with them.

I think I'm about to make a decision that could be as big as grabbing the long, sharp ice spears but, hopefully, it won't have too much of the bitter results of taking Jeffty to the TV store. I'm sure I'll feel like the guy who fired the mapmaker but maybe, someday, the joy of finding Aunt Babe will return.

THE SEVEN WHO FLED? Thanks, I'll find it. Thanks for the sounding board.

Bill

JIM HESS:

At that Denver workshop where you heard it, the book from which I read a staggeringly impressive passage, my favorite novel of all time, the book that taught me more about writing beautifully than anything else I've ever encountered, the book I recommend over and over to everyone who battens on GREAT writing, was:

THE SEVEN WHO FLED by Frederic Prokosch

The 1937 Harper Prize Novel

The passage you remembered (and didn't come within light-years of reproducing from memory, any more than even I could, having read it a hundred times) appears in the opening section (pages 19 through 26) of Book One: Layeville; Chapter 2: "Desert."

The book can easily be found in any one of a half dozen different editions or reprints, including the Dell paperback from the mid-'50s -- in used bookstores or off the net.

Every day any of you wait to get and read a copy of this treasure, is a day longer you live in shadow.

Yr. pal, Harlan

(P.S. Rob and Brian Siano will have to wait a bit for answers to their idle queries. But I've made a reminder note.)

Gunther,

That book on Amazon Germany may be right, but they have the wrong cover. This is the actual cover for the book, which was solicited in the current issue of Diamond Previews (for comic books):

http://www.komikwerks.com/ibooks_vicandblood.php

The ISBN matches for the two books, so I think Amazon simply doesn't have a cover image yet and used this earlier cover (I want to say that's from the late 80's, but I could be wrong).

All,

Just random sharing fun, but those of you who like the Kevin Smith films might get a kick our of the new Clerks Inaction Figures, done in the style of the Clarks animated series. Nice little statues, fairly cheap, that do absolutely nothing.

Regards,
Joseph

Thanks so much, Mr. Ellison, for the kindness of your response. That your fiction has room for outrage is one of the things I value most about it.

You wrote that you're "still often accused of writing to 'shock' (as if that's a bad thing)." I think "accused" is absolutely the right word. People hate to leave their comfort zones...

But for those who are looking for something different, there's Pynchon. Or Gene Wolfe. Or Harlan Ellison. And that's a pretty good thing, I think.

When you revise "The Man Who Rowed Christopher Columbus Ashore"
Don't forget how the Anachronist left that bag of money on the piano bench so Jay Leno wouldn't get arrested.

Along with Brian's question, I wondered if looking back on your body of work (Here comes that schoolgirl syntax)you had a "favorite" period, or if you regard everything you write as perpetual works in progress.

(Fell Down The Old Man Did Dyslexic I Am. Later Together String Goodly Question)

Vic & Blood
I'm back after a long-ish hiatus and just finished catching up with this board, so: hi all.

Now for the inevitable question: can anyone confirm that the new Vic & Blood book coming out is this one?

http://www.amazon.de/exec/obidos/ASIN/0743459032

It certainly looks like it, but one can never know...

Harlan's Recent Writing Style
To Harlan: good to hear you're feeling better, and the best wishes for Susan. Thanks for the word re my guesses on _Spider Kiss_ as well. Maybe someone here who's likely to have a first edition of _Rockabilly_ could check it?

To Colleen, re that forum on horror. It's reprinted in an anthology of the Harper's Forum that was published a few years back. It's not in print, but it's probably obtainable in used bookstores. Other neat things in that collection are a round table on the Perfect Murder (including Donald E. Westlake), and a set of utyterly hilarious advertisements for the Seven Deadly Sins, created by noted ad agencies.

And back to Harlan, re his comments on people accusing him of merely writing to shock: Harlan, the obvious aspect of your recent work is a much more antic, playful narrative, where wildly disparate "bits" are put together, and the narrative voice is likely to introduce wonky jokes and odd wordplay. Stories like "Goodbye to All That," "The Man who Rowed Christopher Columbus Ashore," and "Eidolons" are probably the best recent examples of this, although "Repent, Harlequin"'s clearly an antecedent.

I'm probably glossing over other examples in my memory, but it seemed to me that this was an approach you _hadn't_ used in a long time, or kept it to stories that were clearly playful (like "From A to Z in the Chocolate Alphabet"). But now, you're doing it in stories that try to say more, like "Eidolons," and it seems to a mode you're using more often these days.

I guess I'm asking why this approach seems to have caught your interest recently. Is it just your mood these days? Has there been a slew of writers whose work's inspired you to be more playful? Or am I just focusing on stories you've designed to mke Susan giggle like a fiend when you read them to her?

HARLAN,

U.N.C.L.E. is a rara avis, even here. In all the enjoyable anecdotes about your adventures on the high seas of crappola t.v., your work on the show - the two scripts I'd still love to see - almost never came up. Hell, I'd read more about your souring experience writing for THE FLYING NUN (thanks largely to The Glass Teat)!

...thus: Was U.N.C.L.E. just another assignment to blow off or was it a pleasurable experience for you? Were they an intelligent group to work with (it's my understanding Robert Vaughn was a smart guy)? Did you like how your episodes were filmed?

(If I finally managed to come up with a question succinct and interesting enough for you to want to reply, I'll have felt like I'd won the lottery).

INCIDENTALLY, I'M VERY HAPPY YOU'RE FEELING BETTER. I HOPE AND ASSUME THE SAME COULD BE SAID FOR YOUR WIFE.

...and FRANK:

I actually didn't have a chance to look at your entry on A.I. I realize I'm horrendously biased but I'll scroll back with an open mind. Even if I wind up disagreeing with you, a person who can draw eyes like you just obviously did can only do so feeling passionate about something. I wouldn't want to take that away from you (whether I believe you know film well enough as an art or not) because I KNOW that feeling. That feeling can be like an irreplaceable companion; a companion no one can take away from you. I dislike Spielberg and I explained why ad nauseum (should he come out with something that would change my sentiment you'll know). I won't try to push that in your face anymore.

HAPPY HARLAN REPORTING IN, ANSWERING QUERIES,
PINCHING CHEEKS, GLADHANDING, AND OTHERWISE
INDICATING HOW WELL-DISPOSED HE FEELS TOWARD
THIS BOARD AND ITS DENIZENS AT THE MOMENT:

LYNN: Good luck with your parents, kiddo. Now that Susan and I have completed phase VIII of the March/April/May book-promotion-bookstore-autographing-sessions-university-and-convention-lectures-superFlu-incapacitation-jury-service-long-and-far-traveling-please-just-kill-me-now Nightmare, with only a further laser surgery on the right eye this Tuesday (I'll let yez all know when it's over), we should start thinking about us and you two flexing on over to Picanha for meat-onna-stick. We'll stay in touch. Say hi to Bill for us.

TOM C.: Damned if I can remember the EXACT, the PRECISE reason for thanking Tony Hillerman in the SLIPPAGE acknowledgments. Here's how I assemble those thankyous: as I write a story, I sometimes have occasion to call someone for an errant bit of minutiae or bit of specialty knowledge. Whoever it may be, if s/he can move me along in the writing, in however minuscule a pace or space, I jot down the name on a list I keep in my desk. It may be years before that particular story gets assembled into a collection, and with the other twenty or so other tales, my list of thankyous may be several pages long. So I alphabetize them, and enter them in the book. And sometimes, so many years have elapsed, and so many things have happened, that details such as what Tony said or did that helped me, are lost in the mists of memory. But I NEVER forget to say thankyou. Essential courtesy. (Incidentally, if you've never heard Tony speak, I must let you know that the single most hilarious speech I've ever heard--and I've heard the best, trust me--was Tony's monologue on THE GREAT TAOS BANK ROBBERY. I literally--this is more info than you wanted, but it's the only time it ever happened--literally fell out of my seat at a Bouchercon listening to his droll, deadpan, uproarious telling. Fell out of my seat and just LAY there, in the aisle, so constricted with laughter that I couldn't get up.) (It's been published since, but as enjoyable a read as it may be, it doesn't hold a candle to Tony's stand-up.) And, oh, yeah, Tom, we are indeed talking about the same novelist, Tony Hillerman. A swell guy, a gorgeous writer, and a good friend; but in this instance ... sorry, I can't recall how I imposed on him to advise me at a crucial moment of creation.

JON STOVER: There are hundreds, if not THOUSANDS, of examples of my updating, cleaning-up, revising, correcting, amending, altering, editing and otherwise neatening my stories. I drive collectors and academicians crazy with my sweeping-up and repainting. Virtually every time a story comes in, in page proofs for an anthology, I do something to it. For a MAJOR example, take a look at the upcoming VIC & BLOOD that'll be published this month or next. Compare just the front matter/intro material from the original version, or even the short stories as they first appeared ... and you'll see that I've moved it all into the future. This is by no means unusual for me. We learn as we grow older in the craft, and youthful gaffes -- schoolgirl grammar and syntax, illogicities, misused words, misspellings, plot holes, historically corrupt or outdated facts -- all of these drive me nuts. I cannot help myself. I'm in thrall to an auctorial compulsion to make each story perfect, to botox and liposuck every wen and pustule and wrinkle out of it. So I revise like mad. Almost every time, almost, and have been doing so for years and years. Which is why my awful 1956 short story "But Who Wilts the Lettuce" became the much better "Send Not to Ask For Whom the Lettuce Wilts" a couple of years ago.

BRIAN SIANO: Which leads to your query about SPIDER KISS. Someone would have to compare the original ROCKABILLY edition with, say, The Mysterious Press hardcover that Otto Penzler did, or even better, the version in EDGEWORKS 2. But I don't think that the shade of the paper would have anything to do with revision. More likely it was a matter of the printer changing the roll of printpaper, and it was slightly discolored. But who knows? You could be right. I'm pretty sure that by 1961-62, when I wrote the novel, I no longer used the word Negro (unless it was for a specific purpose), and the term Black was my designation of choice for Ladies and Gentlemen of Color (as Bob Morales calls himself and them).

HERCmember FRANK: Never read any of the plethora of U.N.C.L.E. novelizations. During that period there were franchise novels being written left and right, and most of them were pulpy and hastily written. The exceptions were few and far between. Geo. Alec Effinger did a couple of PLANET OF THE APES paperbacks, Ron Goulart did a number of excellent adaptations, Alan dean Foster and Kev Anderson are masters at the form; and even Thomas Disch did at least one, maybe more, of THE PRISONER novels; and a few of the early STAR TREK books were done by first-rank writers whose work I liked. But I never read an U.N.C.L.E. novel, and of the five writers you asked me to rate, well, several of them are dead, several of them I'd never read at all, and several of them would not be fairly commented-on were I to make an after-the-fact, johnny-come-lately evaluation. You should like what you like, kiddo, and to hell with my opinions.

JOHN K of Grand Rapids: What a lovely and perceptive view of my work. At least >I< think it's lovely and perceptive! I'm still often accused of writing to "shock" (as if that's a bad thing), usually by people who haven't read anything I've written in thirty years -- and they still remember how their mundane world was upset by "A Boy and His Dog" or "The Prowler in the City at the Edge of the World" -- which they read when they were thirteen or so -- and they have no idea of stories like "Mom" or "Laugh Track" or "Goodbye to All That" or "Grail," which are far more representative of where I work now, and have been working for the last twenty or so years. But the quality of outrage you cite, which I take to be the highest compliment you could pay me, is an aspect of my writing that comes from the core of me; and while I often try to deify it on the lecture platform by calling it "passion," you are dead on the money identifying it as outrage. Much of the world pisses me off, and what astonishes ME, is that more people out there aren't made as bugfuck by it as I am. As I've said, too often ever to withdraw it, even now at almost-age-69, "I go to bed angry every night, and get up angrier every morning."

Thank you. Thank you. And, oh, yes, thank you.

INABIF: I haven't heard from Tom Pynchon in a few years. But that's not unusual. Remind me sometime to tell you about the evening I never met him, at which I apparently met him. So the answer is yes, but no. It is also no, but yes, of course.

And that caps it for this weekend. See you later.

Yr. pal, Harlan

Fun bit of Ellisonia
The creative process at work:
Webderlanders, check out the Oct.1989 issue of Harpers, article
titled "In Pursuit of Pure Horror". Harlan, Robert Bloch, Suzy
McKee Charnas, & Gahan Wilson develop and plot an updated version
of the Tell-Tale Heart. It's quite illuminating and fun.

Harlan Ellison
In keeping with the spirit of this board, posting but once a day, and directing inquiries to the subject of the board, ELLISON: I have for Harlan Ellison a question: A number of years ago you did a workshop in Denver, which I attended. During that particular adventure I won't soon forget you read an excerpt from a book, the title and writer of which elude me. But I DO remember piece and parcel of what you read, which goes something like this:

The sun beat down on him. The sun, hot and terrible, dried and lay waste to everything. The sun, unforgiving and relentless, made the journey slow.

That isn't exactly the excerpt, of course. But what was the name of the book and the writer? I want to say Cliford Simak, but that doesn't ring right.

Hellllllp.

Until next time. . .

Andre Norton Dedication
As usual of late, I haven't enough time for a proper post here. But I simply had to share this.

I was at a nearby estate sale today. It was a surprisingly uncrowded house, given the treasures within. Ancient linaments, still in their century-old wrappers. A recording device for children, circa 1930 to 1935, by my estimation. Hundreds of piano rolls, but no player piano.

And dozens of nearly perfectly preserved paperbacks from the 1950s. One of which was an Andre Norton I'd never heard of. THE STARS ARE OURS! screamed the title in heavy square font. Knowing Andre Norton's work as I do, I felt it sported a surprisingly cheesy cover, even for Ace books: A man waking a woman up from apparently cryogenic sleep. His arm is around her shoulders, and she's giving him an indisputable come-hither look. An Ace SPECIAL EDITION the cover blares. And no wonder--the price was a whopping 35 cents.

And inside, on the copyright page, for Ace was not a publisher to waste precious paper on a mere dedication:

For HARLAN ELLISON

Who is a veteran of galactic voyages and an ever
prepared guide to the realms of outer space.

(For those who don't know, Mary Alice "Andre" Norton was, with Harlan, one of the founders of the Cleveland Science Fiction Society.)

Harlan, may I ask--was this book, published when you were but 20, the first ever dedicated to you?

--Alex

Night Visits from the Invisible Man
I recall reading an interview, years ago, in which Mr. Ellison mentioned that it was his reading of Pynchon’s “The Secret Integration” in the Saturday Evening Post that was one of the factors that spurred him to tackle the first Dangerous Visions anthology. I’ve always found a similar vibe in the work of both writers – a kind of post-Beat rhythm that could access high and low culture, could utilize myth and pop culture with equal facility, could make you shiver and laugh in the space of a single page. In that same interview, Mr. Ellison mentions that Pynchon would occasionally phone him or drop him a line now and again. I’ve often wondered if Mr. E has heard from the invisible man in recent years.

Frank's Take on A.I.
Frank,

I've re-read your comments on "A.I." All of what you say I'm sure will make my next viewing of the movie more interesting, but I suspect in the same way reading an academic text is interesting. I don't see it bringing me any closer to feeling for David. Matter of taste, I suppose.

I was thinking of Mr. Ellison's fiction today, and it occurred to me that it sometimes demonstrates outrage, which can seem almost outre in contemporary fiction.

Take, for example, John Updike. It seems to me that his prose can cover even the worst acts with a sort of forgiving gleam, giving them the aura of past, forgiven sins. Maybe that's partly a function of his Christianity, but regardless, I can find no sense of persal outrage in his fiction. I can't see Updike getting worked up about much.

There are, of course, writers who deal with it (some of them women, some of them minorities, some of them neither) but often at the price of characterization or even story. And that cheapens the writing.

But Ellison is able to craft an honest, complex story, with believable, complex characters, that nevertheless in whole or in part shows distinct, unmistakable outrage. I'm thinking of "The Whimper of Whipped Dogs" in particular.

And of course Ellison's capable of more than just that. He doesn't always write prose that screams its fucking lungs out. His fictional scope also includes wistfulness, regret, humor, love, courage, and kindness.

But Ellison is still capable of outrage. That's a rare and important thing in the gray apathetic sameness that encompasses much of contemporary fiction.

And it's an aspect of his work we should be grateful for.

Rick,

Why bother setting up the old board in a new way? Mr. Johnny-come-lately sez:

Because this here is a labor of love for you, otherwise, you'd have said awfuggit a year ago.

Because we can run interference if you need us to. I think Tom C. was not the only one to think that it was "not their place" to say anything. I think Tom C. or anyone else has the perfect right to speak up if a discussion is running too long or getting a little too hot.

Because if this is the only place to post, the trolls will find it. I like the realtively troll-free atmosphere here in the pavilion. When they find the Webderland, and get to the visitor contribution part, they see BULLETIN BOARD. Much more attractive to the more Goldblum-like types, who might be fooled by the Art Deco Dining Pavilion, and so they are drawn to the B-Board like a mediterranean fruit fly to a bug zapper. Keep the Pavilion beautiful.

The old board allows more room for a discussion of a wider array of topics which might need more than one posting. A rule of thumb for long-running topics might be that if the parties involved find themselves repeating the same thing over and over, if the postings are peppered with variations of "I know you are, but what am I?" then the topic is exhausted. Drop it.

Maybe limit the older board to, say, three posting per day as a rule of thumb. If the other poster didn't "get it" after three posts, then they never will. Let it go. Move on.

And finally, try a little brevity. Remember the most important thing is knowing when to stop....

Oh.

Bye for now.

Chuck

Dear Frank,

If "the little past problem" you were refering to is me?

No, I haven't vanished.

Guess what, though? I always get *really* high scores for reading comprehension when I take aptitude tests. (of course the results also indicate "Does not play well with others, but we all know that by now; don't we?)

See; I'm abiding by the rules of this forum. (following the rules. It's just so crazy it might work!) If I have something Ellison related that I want to communicate, or if I have a question I want to ask Mr Ellison, I'll make a post. And I'll limit myself to one post in a given day. And except for that, you won't be seeing any of my beautiful, eloquent, thought provoking and passionate words on this message board. And since, amazingly, there are great stretches of time when I actually have absolutely nothing to say about or to Mr Ellison, that means you won't be hearing from me much. Be happy about that Frank. It's kind of a GOOD thing.

But, don't worry Frank, if you're missing me, "just close your eyes, and think of me, and soon I will be there" (James Taylor, "You've Got Friend)

I realize, that by making THIS post I'm likely to evoke yet more of that obsessive, Rain Man like counting that Barney seems to be compelled to start at any hint or suspicion of my presence, but oh well.

Of things Ellison...

Today I found (and purchased) a used copy of The Fourth Omni Book of Science Fiction, which has a story in it by Mr Ellison, "When Auld's Acquaintence Is Forgot". I also purchased a copy of Richard Matheson's, "The Shrinking Man", on the strength of Mr Ellison's lauding of the author, who he describes (on the inside cover page) as "AMBIDEXTROUS, UNPREDICTABLE, ALWAYS FIRST-RANK...MATHESON HAS BEEN FOR TWENTY-EIGHT YEARS ONE OF OUR MOST CONSISTENTLY ORIGINAL AND MASTERFUL CREATORS OF IMAGINATIVE LITERATURE. FROM THE INITIAL FANTASY NOVELS RIGHT UP TO THE 1970's THERE HAS BEEN ONLY ONE THREAD JOINING THEM;
EXCELLENCE."

I've yet to read the story or the book.

I have nothing else to say at this time, in this place.

Diana

HERCMember Frank - I've been thinning out my shelves to make space, and I've got a near complete set (missing #23) of the Ace U.N.C.L.E. paperbacks currently looking for a good home. If you're interested, feel free to shoot me an e-mail and I'll give you more info.

Dear Unca Harlan, and all others:

I currently am suffering from a major monkey on my back. More like a monkey's U.N.C.L.E.

Within the last month I've purchased a couple very entertaining soundtracks from "Film Score Monthly" for the series I SPY, and THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E. Both have been constants in my CD player, but the U.N.C.L.E. soundtrack is particularly doin it for me. So much so that I've recently been haunting used books stores and buying up any and all U.N.C.L.E. paperbacks I could find. I've only found a few in the series:
#1:THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E. by Michael Avallone
#2: THE DOOMSDAY AFFAIR by Harry Whittington
#5: THE MAD SCIENTIST AFFAIR by John T. Phillifent
#6: THE VAMPIRE AFFAIR; #8: THE MONSTER WHEEL AFFAIR; #13 THE RAINBOW AFFAIR and #15 THE UTOPIA AFFAIR, all by David McDaniel; and
#14: THE CROSS OF GOLD AFFAIR by Fredric Davies.

My question to you, Mr. Ellison-- not so much because you worked on the U.N.C.L.E. series, although that prompted me to post here, but because, well, you know this stuff, and you've already introduced me to many other writers who have become favorites ( Cornell Woolrich, Mervyn Peake, John D. MacDonald, Fritz Leiber... ) is: Have you any opinion of the authors I've mentioned? Any I should be sure to read? I'm afraid I'm ignorant of all of them.

Thank you for your time!

minor addictions
To you multiple posters who can't follow directions:

Ask yourselves this: Putting aside the inability to abide by very clearly stated rules whose repeated violation endangers EVERYONE's opportunity to communicate with like-minded individuals in this often wonderful forum, how essential is it that your every thought must be seen by everyone else, as opposed, for example, to the particular person whose last comments you are responding to directly?

Does the given subject matter really interest you that much (in which case, it might be in everyone's best interests -- including yours -- to take it up privately with the last person who expressed the greatest interest in it), or is "being seen" really what's most important to you?

You could also ask yourself how many other activities might be at least as productive to you as responding to the most recent comment in the Art Deco Dining Pavilion -- hunting up and reading the Harlan Ellison books you haven't encountered yet, for example.

Just a thought from a guy who hasn't broken the rule in a long time, and intends not to in the future.

First of all, apologies on breaking the one-post-per-day rule. I'd figured that since the main board was closed, and if I could add a valuable comment, it'd be OK.

That said, I'm breaking the rule again, because someone asked a question where I may know the answer.

Jon Stover asked if Harlan ever changed cultural references in the reprints of his stories. I think I may know of one such example, but Harlan would have to verify it. When I bought the reprint of _Spider Kiss_ in the early 1980s-- the one with the Barclay Shaw cover-- I noticed that a batch of pages in the middle were of a slightly different color. I also noticed that these were the pages which referred to Stag Preston "knocking up a Black girl."

The capitalization of "Black" seemed a bit odd, especially since, at the time the novel took place, people would have used the word "Negro" or worse. So I suspected that maybe those pages were changed because those other words might have been used in previous editions.

Now, I have no hard evidence to support this; I've never seen another edition of _Spider Kiss_, so I can't check if the text was changed, and the replacement of a batch of pages in a paperback seems a bit unlikely. But the confluence of the odd-color of the pages and the subject matter caught my eye, and I've been wondering about this ever since.

So, Harlan: Was there a minor adjustment to the text of _Spider Kiss_ in that edition_?

Siano sez...
Hey Brian, Lenora wanted to know, was that light or dark chocolate they were using? I guess good food porn is all about the little details. I loved that post.

Monday night I had to give a Megan's Law presentation to the local citizen action group I'm on. Didn't mind doing it at all. Outing this particular fellow to the neighborhood will cause me no loss of sleep whatsoever on the civil liberties front. He is exactly the sort of creep Megan's Law was designed to protect people from. But it sure is a can of worms. Four seperate sets of guidelines with some potential for broad interpretation depending on who exactly your talking to and how far away from said "creeps" domicile you happen to be standing when your talking.

Another wrinkle was that the local press had to leave the room even though most of this guys rap sheet convictions were and are available through the self same press website. PLUS, the Captain of the Allentown Police who was scheduled to give half the presentation got called out at the last minute leaving me to do the rapsheet as well as the guideline part of the presentation.

Strange days.

Last night I saw a play about the letters of Virginia Woolfe.
Gives me hope for the talking heads Twain thing I'm still immersed in.

Today I built forms, ran a stone tamper and poured some concrete. Got some sun. It's a good life.

- Barney Dannelke

Reasons.
Jim~ No one posting would be a pretty silly. How the hell are people supposed to ask questions to which on the Man On The Hill has the answers?

Scott~ There are several open source (freeware) bulletin board systems that manage access security (and private messages and all sorts of nifty things). Rick wouldn't have to spend anytime to program anything. (They even come with administrative utilities and consoles for some of the more mundane maintenance tasks.) Some of you might have to tolerate an extra login screen before you got to the selection of forums (topics classified by subject, threaded discussions), but that way access is managed and yet the forum is still open and inviting.

They even come with customizable color schemes.... {Cue peanut gallery: OOOOOOOOoooooo.}

Cindy~ HUGS.

Jay~ You're crazy.

Harlan~ Get BETTER. American literacy rates are sliding and it's all because you're behind schedule! {insert raspberry here}

Rick~ A couple of reasons: Because as crazy as we are, you like us. And without us, your life would be empty and meaningless. Okay, maybe not. But we can be entertaining, yes? On the odd occasion?

All~ Sorry I haven't been around more. Dad had back surgery on Monday and I've been playing taxi up and down the coast. (Mom doesn't get around too well these days and Dad's excuse for me being there is that he doesn't want her to drive the Mercedes.... ::sigh:: Parents.) But he's home now and recovering nicely. God love vicodin.

L.

Well, this is about writing, anyway.

I noticed awhile back that my two versions of Stephen King's "The Monkey" are different only insofar as King changes some of the topical references to rock bands and rock magazines for the story's republication. On a larger scale, the same thing happened with the two versions of The Stand. Anyone recall other writers who do this sort of minor rejigging, and any thoughts on it? I find it a weird sort of rewrite, and I was sifting around through Ellison collections to see if I could find similar examples, which I haven't. Hey, it's a slow, wet day.

Cheers, Jon

Once a day: That's all that is asked of youse
Rick: My two cents on the POST ONCE PER DAY, FER CRISSAKES, CAN'T YOU READ, PEOPLE?

How about this: Let Harlan or perhaps you post a post once per day or whenever. Then, if folks here want to post a reply (helpful or otherwise), they may do so.

Otherwise. . . NO POSTINGS. PERIOD. And if people post more often than that, if they post again before you or Harlan post again, said posts land in the infamous bit bucket or slag heap.

As for reading rules and whatnot anywhere, well, geezus, you could post a six foot high board, three feet wide, that tells people what the rules are for a given setting and when they break said rules the reply is: What sign?

My two cents.

I'm off to my boards, for now.

Until next time. . .

Rick W,

I noticed the multiple posts per day by some and was tempted to post about it but felt that as a lurker it wasn't my place to say anything. I find it more enjoyable and easier to keep up with the forum when everyone, other than Harlan that is, limit themselves to one post per day.

----

Last week I bought Slippage and I have a question for Harlan. In the acknowledgements, I notice the name Tony Hillerman. Is this the same Tony Hillerman who has written the Jim Chee/Joe Leaphorn novels? I love his novels and was wondering, assuming the correct Hillerman, what the acknowledgement was for.

Thanks,

Tom

Harlan,

I don't know if Fox Sports is available in the Los Angeles area, but they will apparently be re-broadcasting the Seniors Championship on or around May 24th (the Fox website is rather, how shall we put it, badly organized; you'd think a cable channel would have a schedule section).

Regards,
Joseph

I Can Count to One, and Have Mastered Tying Shoes....

Well, toward Rick's query, it's his baby, and whatever he wants is fine. I just hope that a few might've considered taking in my email address if, for some go forsaken reason, they feel an urge to send me a post to follow up on something when the limit is exceeded. I do like the site, I do like this board and the slightly disturbed individuals who frequent it (same to you, pal!), but I've successfullt lived thirty-eight years sans Webderland, and am sure I could draw breath if the site were to disappear. Else, realize that Unca Harlan's nook is privilege, and can be removed as all other privileges can at bad behaviour. The preceding comment stems from being a father, and don't make me come up there....

My only concern about registration is whether or not Rick wants the extra effort to have to program it. It seems the task of running things is leviathan enough, atop all the stuff of living a soul will have to do.

As for refusing M. Ellison the right to come here, rubbish! The man seems to enjoy our company too, and can remove himself if he feels that there is conduct untoward his person being levied by one of us. Funny though, but I've noticed that Ellison seems to handle disagreements with class, style and panache, showing me that there is always something to be gained by taking the high road.

With that, gone.
Have a good weekend, all!

Scott Reeston

Literary Hijinks
A friend of mine asked if I was attending a local how-to-fix-it thing this weekend in our neighborhood. Since I'd conned her into reading a bunch of historical novels I like, I sent her the following:

"Stephen brought himself into the topmost attic with a final wheeze, and took in the view. Far to the south, an albatross glided for miles without so much as dipping a wing, while leeward of the house's scuppers a school of house-possums kept pace with the house in hopes of a stray piece of buscuit or hard-tack from a kind-hearted crewman. A steady thumping and scraping above his head, accompanied by half-hearted sea-oaths, was the second watch applying a fresh layer of tar and plug-a-pew to the mansard roof. It was here in the attic that Stephen found some solace from the constant demands on his time as ship's surgeon. As his quill traced out another diary entry, following a code known only to himself, Stephen reflected that Jack could probably judge the house's speed merely by listening to the creaks and groans of the house's cross-braces."

From _The Row-House Sea_ by Patrick O'Brian

HARLAN: Take your mind off it, Nazz; we gotcha covered.

My jury service ended today. I'm back in the world. And I have a small favor to ask of anybody who remembers:

My nephew, Loren Rabnick (my sister's kid, out of Cleveland) is wrestling for a national championship in the "veterans" class. He's 50, and he's taken at least a third place in the US Championships previously. Within the next coupla weeks he'll be in Vegas at this year's competition. I understand the place to go to get the skinny on this sort of thing is www.themat.com and if one or another of you webheads has the inclination, would you sorta keep a watch on it; and when the results are in (certainly no earlier) could you let me know how Loren did? He's a good kid (I still think of him as my little kid nephew) and I'd be very grateful if one of you would ... well, you've got it by now.

Thanks in advance, yr. pal, Harlan

Rick, simple answer to your rejoiner:

Because in this world of illiterates, we are some clever bastards and bastardettes. This room lets me know that I am not alone in the world with a disdain for average thinking. We are the brood with something to prove, and we are cool as can be. And most importantly, our little past problem has vanished. But thank you for giving us this venue. I know it can be a pain.

---------------

Phillip, read my essay on AI. Gonna school ya son. lol.

AI - I Have No Mouth - Identity
This is sort of HE-related. A few days ago, someone here said the ending of “A.I” is comparable to the white room at the end of “2001.” I don’t think so. As unemotional as Dave in “2001” is, after everything he’s gone through, you can’t help but feel for the guy. The white room is significant because Dave is signifcant. David in “A.I.,” however, is a robot, not a human being, and as I’m not a robot, I find it difficult to feel for him; none of his “feelings” are real. No matter how you dress him up, he’s still a robot (I’m thinking of the Monty Python chocolate-covered frog skit). David never seems to master anything. He never becomes a “real boy.” Despite his coming to grips with mortality, he is a slave to his programming, to love his “mother” and have her love him, from the beginning to the end. I think of HE’s “I Have No Mouth...” The characters are wretched human beings, but at least they’re human, and so they matter. That’s why the story resonates beyond the time it was written. Same deal with “2001,” but not “A.I.” If I was a robot, I would probably find it insightful and significant in some way. If I was a robot. How is David’s story a human story? Why should I care?

My two bits on “Identity” (not too HE-related and full of spoilers): "Identity" is a gimmick movie disguised as a whodunit. It isn't even a scary movie. It's an intellectual puzzle at best and really not that engaging. I knew what was going on almost immediately. The first time I stopped to think, "Why are they showing us this scene that seems to have nothing to do with the rest of the movie?," I realized there was only one thing that could explain what was happening: none of it was real, it was all being made up in someone's mind. I sat there for half the movie waiting for that to be revealed, and then when it was revealed, the movie kept going to a conclusion that was silly. Despite the strong cast, never once during the movie did I care about what was going to happen. People get killed and it's about as shocking as watching a character in a video game get killed. And when the secret of what's really going on is revealed, I think many people will feel cheated.

Rick,
My knee-jerk reaction is to tell you to shut it down completely, but then again you obviously get some enjoyment (maybe not as much as when you started this, but still some enjoyment) from these venues. My personal, cynical opinion is that it may be a good thing if we step away from the computer teat and interact PHYSICALLY with the outside world. However, as is evidenced by those that post here on a regular basis, these are some good folks. I've even met a few of them and damned if cliches weren't broken. Good people. And with getting good people together you will occassionally get some 'bad' people. Way of the world.

I think Alex Jay and Jay make some good points, but ultimately it's your decision and asking us for our opinion is kind of a fool's game. I say that with no disrespect and only that if you want to keep the board active, then keep it active. If you don't, then shut it down and nothing personal meant by the shutdown, but you have your life and some of us need to find ours. Again, if it's causing you much ire, then I would suggest that you shut it down 'cause this Board is not worth any amount of pain and suffering or inconvenience (no matter how small) to you. If the Board does give you some enjoyment and it looks like the advantages of hearing from 'good' people outweigh your own annoyances then keep the Board up.

And, more to the point, if you do keep the Board active I would suggest this:

1) One post per day. It makes for a helluva way to converse, but us 'regulars' sometimes don't know when to say when. Plus, it does keep knee-jerk posting to a minimum.

2) Or, if one post per day doesn't work, how 'bout limiting to a certain amount of words per post (or, lines or characters, whichever works best).

3) Limit it to HERC members. Draconian for sure, but no different from some other venues of this sort.

4) As Jay mentioned, registering before posting with the added caveat that it's gotta be a good email address.

5) Make us 'regulars' do something to help out, whether it be monetary or time related.

6) Don't let Harlan speak on the Board. Another Draconian measure that may be pointless in even bringing up, but I think it's disingenuous for us to believe that most posts to these Boards aren't in some way trying to vie for Harlan's attention. Take away the Personality and you may end up taking away some of the 'bad' also. Those of us that actually do like the conversation can remain.

Way longer than I intended, but those are my thoughts.

And, if the Board is still up, I will unstraighten my britches and list a (much shorter) post regarding One Hour Photo and my dislikes of that movie. Tomorrow. 'Cuz I can tell everyone is just dying to hear it.

Following the rules
Delurking...

I think it comes down to how much Rick feels like dedicating to the site. AJ Berman made a great point about webderlanders being willing to reduce the burden by becoming moderators or bouncers or hired thugs.

Its whatever works for you, Rick, despite what we think. You sound like you're pretty close to overbooked anyway and returning the the free post all-u-can-eat format presents additional stresses you don't need including:

1. Becoming, as you say, a source of insult and stress to the patron author.
2. Requiring you to be den mother whenever there's a fight in the ball pit.
3. Whatever else bothers you that you're not sharing for thesake of being polite.

Monitors would help that, though your belief in freedom of expression prohibits clamping down on someone until they threaten to boil someone's bunny and by then a full-scale shitstorm is blowing. I don't know how you feel, but perhaps its time to require registration. Your choice to keep the board anonymous leads to many of the headaches we're discussing. Requiring a name, email and other contact information and verifying it would go a long way to reducing problem members. I know: more work. I simply offer it as a solution. A registration would also provide KICK, HERC and other Harlan-related ventures with a mailing list should the registered users wish to join them.

But the answer to your "why should i bother building you a new playground when you keep fucking up the jungle gym?" question: Because this is your site ad we're here out of loyalty not only to Harlan, but to you. Why do you think there aren't splinter boards of Harlan fans? Why is it that every time you vent stress and threaten to drop the board someone doesn't just say "Hey, come on over to this board!"? Why do we all go on with long, tired appeals every time there's some crisis of faith?

Because its Rick Wyatt's board.

Face it, bubby. You're too fucking likeable. You built it, we came. You introduced the group, provided a forum that clicks...and we are loyal. Sorry to put that burden on you, chief, but take heart in the knowledge that - should you ever be in need - any number of us would come to your aid. So you ask why you should bother? Take a look at the Visit column of your webalizer.

{engaging lurk cloak}

RICK: You asked why you should bother setting up the old board again in a new way. Well, here you are:

* Because there are people who DO follow the rules.
* Because there are people brought together by the old board who truly do care about each other and about what each other thinks.

* Because some of us are fully prepared to send you gifties in thanks (and no; I'm not kidding).

* Because having a freer "outlet" board will keep THIS board--the "More Harlan" board--pristine.

* Because I'm enjoying all hell out of the REDEMOLISHED Alfred bester collection right now, with a quote from the Patron Author on the back cover.
(Hey, what's a Webderland post without a non sequitur?)

* Because many Webderlanders would pronbably be willing to become board monitors or co-maintainers or summat, to ease the strain on you,

* Because the old board offered a great opportunity for people new to Harlan's writing (and good writing by other authors as well) to learn more about things they would enjoy.

* Because, for the most part, the old board was emoticon and net-anagram ("LOL," "ROFLMAO," et cetera)-free, and such a place must be preserved.

* Because even when flames rose over the horizon, the signal-to-noise ratio was much better than most sites and boards on the Internet, and places like THAT must be preserved.

* Because it offers a place for people to simply talk about themselves according to their need, and get sincere caring, advice, and support from the people there (Remember Alia's attack? Chuck's bad night? Jay's relationship worries? Wasn't it heartwarming to see both the outpouring of support and kind reactions to those crises? And isn't it nicer to know that they all turned out well?)

* Because posts on this board have allowed me to better my writing, and have been used as jumping-off points for writing gigs.

* Because it is a place to learn things--and while "information" may or may not "want to be free", KNOWLEDGE should be freely offered whenever possible, away from the yipyops who use the former exhortation as justification for thievery and ignorance.

* And because it is a good place-which-is-not-a-place to be, and a fine source of entertainment.



ALL: Just as reminder, Saturday, May 3rd, is Free Comic Book Day, so go down to your local comix shop and enjoy the goodies they'll have for you--and support an artform not given the respect it deserves.
http://www.freecomicbookday.com/

HARLAN: In the comics vein, here is another proof that the Internet can be used for Good: At http://tothfans.dynu.com/tothfans.asp is a site devoted to the great artist Alex Toth--he posts regularly to the site, is VERY vocal about what he feels and believes, and there are a goodly number of classic Toth stories archived there, with biting commentary from the Master himself alongside. It'a amazing to see how self-critical he can be, often angry at something or other he sees as a failing in his Art. There's a lot to be learned there.

May 2nd. Friday. 1:30am. The air is cold and damp. Variable winds at 5mph. Relative humidity is 83%.

I already e-mailed Rick assuring him I wouldn't lose control again. I will STICK to my regimen of ONE-A-DAY. So youse can empty the chambers of your .22 calibers and unruffel your feathers. Here lemme pour ya a drink. Like Scotch?

Can't 'xactly explain why I did what I did. Don't know what possessed me. It must have been that fog - the thick, threatening swirl of retribution in a desolate world I never made...the baggage from tussling with the most dangerous animal in the world...a woman!!! My wounded virility made me take it out on innocents...who just happened to be in the line of fire when shit flew and I had to chew on spleen. Yeah. Yeah, that MUST have been it: whichever way ya turn...Fate sticks out a foot to trip you. And the only road ya see...is a desert highway.

But don't worry Little Timmy. We'll make it ta California SOME day.

Mea really, honestly, culpa
Harlan,

Honest to gawrsh, I did read your posting, only when I saw your reference to the Thinking Machine, I thought, "cool!" and it must have set off some endorphine or something in my brain, and I got a couple of sentences mixed up - which pretty much screwed up my take on what you were saying. And the sun was in my eyes, and I had a rock in my shoe. I'll read more carefully next time.

Brian,

Death by Chocolate? You are one hurtin' buckaroo, pard.

Chuck

My ONE post...because I CARE...
#1: High five to those who also enjoyed IDENTITY with me. For those who didn't: Hey (shrugs). See, I'd gleamed the idea of it early on, HOWEVER, and maybe I'm wrong for doing so, but when I pay to see a movie, topmost importance to me is to be entertained. Lights and shadows, baby, lights 'n shadows. As time goes, it becomes harder to lose myself in the world of the movie. This movie allowed me to run free. Me LOVES the scary flicks and me LOVED this flick. So please, take yer pins, burst someone else's bubbles.

#2: I'm with Rick. PLEASE follow the rules. As a matter of fact, I think I'm taking a sabbatical to posting unless I have something Ellison-related or, as this board seems to have been at points in the past, writing-related. In other words, this board is becoming like the old board, and I don't like it. With all this talk of (sigh) Kubrick vs, Spielberg, the merits or lack thereof of other things, the idea of some of the quieter people (of whom I still consider myself) coming here to ask something or share some, to them anyway, recent epiphany of some work (like how I realized the other day, after listening to "I Have No Mouth, And I Must Scream," how very much I felt like the main character at the end of the story but realizing that yes, there was SOME hope, no matter how depraved it may be).

Call me a moron. Call me a brown-nose. Fuck, I've been feeling pretty fucked-up lately, call me anything. But please adhere Mr. Wyatt's warning.

Bill the Insomniac

I saw Identity, and, like Todd, I figured out the surprise very early in the film. At that point, I stopped caring, because (um, SPOILER ALERT) much of what was depicted onscreen wasn't really happening. Any suspense was lost.

Plus I found the whole thing so implausible as to be insulting.

Still, some of the movie works. The performances ground it, especially Cusack's, and the Agatha Christie nature is fun for a while.

But this is not high art. It ain't even The Core.

Identity
Bill, the spouse and I saw Identity this weekend and we also loved it, even though I had it figured out the moment...SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER................................................

The moment the 'escaped con' ran from the motel and ended up right back at the motel. Hmmmm, I says, let's figger this sucker out now, and I figured the 'surprise' 30 seconds later.

When I do that shit I usually nudge the spouse and ask her if she wants to know what I figured, and she usually says "Sure" even if it's a spoiler. I always impress her with that shit and you know what happens to guys who impress their chicks with their intelligence......yup, lucky as a four-leaf clover!!!

Anyway, even with my knowing what was going on fairly early, it enhanced my enjoyment and saved another couple hours of my life by not requiring I see the movie again to see what clues I missed.

It had it's faults....Big-Baldy getting his sentence reconsidered so easily was a bit of a stretch, but I still had a blast.

-TODD

"I loved the PI with Harlan, Henry Rollins, Penn Jellett, and somebody else...lol...Penn gave Harlan a run for his money in that gabbing fest. Strange, that the usually talkative Rollins just glowered."

That's because no one, not even Rollins, could get a word in edgewise. That episode was the Harlan & Penn Show.

"Has anyone ever read a Rollins poetry (?) book all the way through? He is sometimes interesting, but not much of a writer, actually. Even though I dig that punk rock shit."

The best way to experience Rollins' writing is at a spoken-word performance. Chock fulla stories, veering from one topic to the next, for three hours straight. He's consistently hilarious, and he makes sure to drop in some crunchies to think about.


Mitch

Have I not been EFFING CLEAR enough?
Ladies and Gentlemen, may it please the Court, I present Exhibit A, today's posting log:
rich- Thursday, May 1 2003 6:15:54
Brian Siano- Thursday, May 1 2003 6:23:32
Inabif- Falmouth, New England - Thursday, May 1 2003 8:17:25
Brian Siano#2- Thursday, May 1 2003 9:3:41
Tony- Thursday, May 1 2003 9:16:46
Rob- Thursday, May 1 2003 9:53:40
P.A. Berman- Thursday, May 1 2003 10:55:14
Bill Gauthier- New Bedford, MA - Thursday, May 1 2003 11:50:53
Chris L- Thursday, May 1 2003 12:18:48
Rob#2- Thursday, May 1 2003 12:49:8
Rob#3- Thursday, May 1 2003 12:53:48
Chris L#2- Thursday, May 1 2003 13:19:11
Rob#4- Thursday, May 1 2003 13:36:45
Frank Church- Thursday, May 1 2003 13:41:37
Rob#5- Thursday, May 1 2003 13:42:48
DTS- Thursday, May 1 2003 14:8:22
DTS#2- Thursday, May 1 2003 14:11:42
ROB#6- Thursday, May 1 2003 18:16:30
Rob#7- Thursday, May 1 2003 18:19:47

FOUR people today couldn't keep to one post a day. And Rob, Rob....holy mother of Christ, Rob.

It says one post a day on the top of the page. It asks the same thing, nicely, on the posting page. I've come in here several times and done everything but jump up on the dinner table and kick over the centerpiece and scream the same thing.

This is precisely the sort of shit (with all deference to the also-instrumental role of foul-mouthed carping and hair-pulling) that got the first board narfed. And also the sort that makes me wonder what's the use of working on bringing the old board back in a new form. Why go through the heartache, he asks himself, if people are inconsiderate enough to do this sort of crap when they KNOW they're on double secret probation?

I'm interested in your thoughts (your ONCE A DAY thoughts) - why should I bother?

Honor the webmaster
Rob~

What part of "one post per day" did you not get?

L.

DTS,

Incidentally, I haven't a SINGLE conservative book on my shelf. Never did never will.

DTS,

Well, it's certainly splitting PUBIC hairs!

But, yes, that's more precise. I think Archibald Leach went a TAD further than the Romans when he shared an apartment to sustain an intimate relationship with the actor Randolph Scott.

FRANK: (Those of you who HAVEN'T SEEN IDENTITY: READ NO FURTHER) I gotta admit: having read THE MINDS OF BILLY MILLIGAN (and a few other books on the same subject), I knew what was coming before the scene in which they led the serial killer into the interrogation room. Still, it _was) an interesting film with lots of great actors.
--DTS

ROB: Don't know if this is splitting hairs in your book (especially if it's a conservative book, full of narrow passages), but Cary Grant was -- according to biographers and others -- bisexual. He bedded women AND men. Sort of like folks did way back in the Roman times, before "lines in the sand" (as it were) were drawn by societal leaders.
--DTS

Chris,

"Man, Cary Grant sure is cool here!"

...they wouldn't have said that if they knew Cary Grant was gay!

Bill, I also liked Identity, but Confidence, with Dustin Hoffman, is a bit better. I did notice during the first half of Identity a middle aged couple walked out. The first part does resemble a typical slasher film, then the rest of the film basically just fucks with your head and the surprise ending just clamps your balls to the seat. I'm sure Stevie King wishes he would have thought of the plot first.

--------------

I personally think Studs is a national treasure, but his question was pretty dumb. But Studs is one of the shining lights on the left so I give him a pass. He was joking around, I'm sure.

------------

Paula, I will admit, Chomsky's main flaw is his lack of cultural literacy. I mean, the guy doesn't go to the movies or the theatre; he rarely listens to music, and doesn't watch television. I love him to death, but cultural conservatives get under my skin.

And Howard Zinn is getting Senile. He has to be. His reflexive pacifism is a real problem, and he really bores me as a speaker.

--------------

I loved the PI with Harlan, Henry Rollins, Penn Jellett, and somebody else...lol...Penn gave Harlan a run for his money in that gabbing fest. Strange, that the usually talkative Rollins just glowered.

Has anyone ever read a Rollins poetry (?) book all the way through? He is sometimes interesting, but not much of a writer, actually. Even though I dig that punk rock shit.

Chris,

Actually, there's ONE more thought I'd like to submit regarding muted peformances among secondary cast members in OHP. The entire film is about Sy. We're seeing the world and everyone in it from his pov. He sees people - this family in particular - in one dimension. All the other characters, then, are presented to us in tight pockets: we are shown what is happening in their real lives just enough to see the contrast between the outside world and Sy's view of reality. The family has problems Sy doesn't want them to have or believe they COULD have. To show more going on with the other characters would probably be a bit extraneous. We don't need to know them in great depth. Just the world they live in contrasting the world Sy has "assembled". Because of this, however flat other peformances MIGHT have been it doesn't matter. In fact, it only underscored Sy's way of perceiving things.

...thus, the film works. Not flawlessly; few things DO. But it works.

Sorry for the 2nd post but I just wanted to correct my last one. Obviously, I meant "out of tune" instead of "out of town." Out of town is what I will be in a week when I am done writing all my wretched papers for the semester. I love Sam Raimi but right now I am sick of reading and writing about him, dammit!

While I'm breaking the rules with a second post, I'll xpand a bit on Gerry:

In a strange way, the movie is a bit like a feature-length version of the Stargate sequence in 2001. But there's a good reason Kubrick cast an unknown actor (and one who looked so golly gash darned normal and average and utterly non-descript) as Dave Bowman. Dave's isolation and transformation would not work as well, I would argue, if everyone in the audience was sitting there thinking "Man, Cary Grant sure is cool here!"

One adjustment there: ok, let's say upper middle income not blue coller. I've been watching KING OF THE HILL too much lately.

Chris,

Sure it worked. If the dad's performance was uneven it was hardly to the detriment of the film. The wife, the kid, and the asshole boss, however, were as blue coller as most people behave. And, in fact, when the father was in the store being approached by Sy his reactions were delivered just right; he was completely convincing. I DO agree had it not been for Williams the film could have EASILY fallen to the level of those lame tv-movies. Had we left the movie to the REST of the cast that might well have been the case. But because of Williams and the film's structure the checks and balances are intact. Thematically the film works.

rich,

I agree with you about OHP. It wasn't far from being a success but it didn't work. Williams' performance was excellent but he was flying solo. The msot noteworthy problem was the dreadful, somnolent performance delivered by the husband - the kind of awful performance you rarely see in a professionally made film and it ground almost every scene he was in to a screeching halt. In the scene where he is supposed to be terrorized by Sy, I could swear the actor actually yawned. Not everyone in the symphony has to be perfect but when one instrument is so badly out of town, it destroys the piece.

I thought the set design at the store was lovely, however. The final scene went over like a lead balloon - that scene doesn't work well in Psycho either.

Todd,

My thought on Gerry:

It's the only movie I have ever seen which I could describe as "enthrallingly enervating." Fans have described it as a meditation and I suppose that's a good description. I might call it an echo chamber. Or perhaps a "negative space" (to borrow Manny Farber's phrase), a vaccuum which invites the viewer to fill it himself. Judging by the box office, an audience abhors a vaccuum.

I appreciated Gerry for showing me things I am certain I have never seen before and not by way of the razzle dazzle of CGI or rapid-fire digital bay-induced editing. That simple moving handheld shot of their bobbing heads suspended in space and held for a seeming eternity - amazing. Werner Herzog says that movie-making for him is the pursuit of images never captured before. I think Gerry is a Herzogian endeavour. The deconstruction of these two characters until they become nothing more than self-referential images on the screen and then further degraded to mere silhouettes limping across the landscape - it has actually grown in power since I saw it. I think about this movie every time I'm in the desert now.

The only flaw was the casting choice. Not that either Damon or Li'l Affleck were bad. But it was a mistake, IMHO, to cast actors who bring any meaning with them from the outside world. It breaks the hermetic seal this movie attempts to form. The Gerries speak their own language, make decisions employing their own logic - it all fits within this world and nowhere else. But Matt Damon is Matt Damon and he comes from a parallel universe, the real world. That breaks the spell, if only a little.

From the Other Side of the Tracks...
Movies:

Saw IDENTITY last night and LOVED it. Great acting, great story. Now go on, rip it to shreds.

Ellison on TV:

The MASTERS OF FANTASY special on Sci-Fi Channel was one that I was not only smart enough to tape but to have NOT taped over. When I'm in need of a push, dragging ass to the keyboard to write, I either pop that in or a documentary on Stephen King that aired on TLC (from the BBC) about a year or two ago. It would be cool to have a catelogue of Harlan's appearances (along with access and/or transcripts).

Back to the other side of town,
Bill
(who may be getting himself into a major pile of shit at home)

Thought some of you might find this amusing. From McSweeneys.net, it's a mock discussion between Noam Chomsky and Howard Zinn about The Fellowship of the Ring. I thought it was pretty funny, and I KNOW Frankie will appreciate it.

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2003/04/22fellowship.html

PAB

Rich,

Well, you clearly need your britches straightened - as is often the case.

In OHP, yes, Williams' acting is the engine of the movie. But the truth is his peformance would not have been as powerful without the structure and imagery of the film, and vice versa. They are symbiotically linked. One without the other and the film would have been a lesser film. All the parts are the aggregate of a single character. And that's what the movie is about.

The film resonated a solitude - a sense of being at peace, reflecting Sy's attachment to his "surrogate family". Sy lives in a fantasy world - cocooned in reverie - to compensate for things he never had. The whole movie is a diary, written in an interrogation room (perhaps the first place he ever revealed his "problem"). Indeed, the structure of the film itself was a cocoon, opening in the interrogation room upon his capture and closing by turning the cross-examination into intimate conversation (interestingly, after telling his story Sy asks the cop about his family almost by unconscious reflex, as if to attach himself or identify himself through his perceived kindness of the officer; he needs to live vicariously through people who have it together). Thus, by juxtaposing the real world with Sy's, the film's imagery evokes a sense of hopeless detachment and a voyeuristic longing. When an individual grows up emotionally deprived, abused by neglect or worse, he creates his own rules (his outburst and how he handled the couple philandering in the hotel suggest worst; I'm convinced none of his actions were truly his own but vicarious ones. He was going through the motions of his fantasies, if you will, or how he was treated growing up). What happens when others break those rules? He transgresses and justifies every bit of it.

This film was not about a big climax. It was about a personal trap. A very small, quiet predictable world - symbolized by the "snap shot" - and how far someone like Sy would go when someone violates that world. The pieces of this movie are put together very much like the unsettling montage of snapshots on Sy's wall, with wide shots, quick cuts and oblique angles alluding to a human being who is not whole and has assembled a self-image in pieces adopted from other individuals. THAT'S WHY IT'S A GOOD FILM.

In a subtle way, the film is reminiscent of Melville's "Bartleby the Scrivener" - about a man chained to a world of repetition and whose job mechanizes his psychological reactions to events in this tight vacuum. Even environment - the backdrop - is used in the same way to reflect the character's calcified emotional state.

Leigh's question
It's from Blazing Saddles.

I don't know if anyone's catalogued Harlan's TV appearances. I do remember one in the early 1980's. It was a show on the A&E channel called _Nightcap: Conversations on the Arts and Letters_. Pretty nifty show. The hosts were Studs Terkel and Calvin Trillin. I recall one show where they reunited the writing staff of _Your Show of Shows_, which inclued Mel Brooks, Larry Gelbart, Neil Simon and Woody Allen.

Anyway, the SF show they did brought together Harlan Ellison, Isaac Asimov and Gene Wolfe. The opening comments were:

Studs: "Lemme see if I understand this. You guys predict the future, right?"
Harlan: "That's bullshit, Studs...."

Other sparklers involved Gene Wolfe talking about a physicist friend who'd written to him that his "time-reversal experiments were progressing more slowly," and a debate over what'd happen if they'd dropped Gandhi on Hiroshima instead of the Bomb (Asimov: "Gandhi is dandy, but liquor is quicker." Harlan: "That's _terrible_." Asimov: (gleefully evil nodding of head))

HE on TV
Does anyone have a list of Mr. Ellison’s TV appearances? I’m not speaking about teleplays he has written or adaptations of this work. I’m looking for a list of chat show and documentary appearances. I know he did a few guest spots on the Tomorrow Show and on Tom Snyder’s late-90s chatfest. I know he has been on Politically Incorrect and SF Buzz and Laws of Gravity. I know that the Sci Fi Channel did a documentary on him a few years ago and that he did those West Coast Geo car commercials. He has done some voice work on Babylon 5 and Psy Factor and even Mother Goose and Grim. Is there a definitive list someplace?

I came across the phrase "Death by Chocolate" once agai. Never liked the phrase; seemed a mix of the mundane and the overblown, sort of like calling a dessert "Total Vanilla Decadence."

Anyway, I thought of a bunch of evil guys, pirates or terrorists, who inflict a Death by Chocolate on someone. They take him down into a concrete pit, maybe ten feet deep, and chain his ankle to the bottom with maybe a foot or two of play. And they start pumping liquid chocolate into the pit. Slowly. The guy knows that the chain will keep him well below the level of the chocolate once it gets high enough, so he starts screaming to be let out, he'll do anything, for the love of God please don't do this to me... but the chocolate keeps pumping in. He tugs at the chain. He tries to pull it apart. When it passes his ankles, he tries to jump up, but the chain holds him back, and he twists his ankle on the chain's anchor when he lands. In terrible pain, he hobbles on his one good leg, pleading for his life. The chocolate passes his waist, then his chest, and finally, it's creeping up his throat. He tries to get out. He starts to tread, to keep his mouth above the chocolate. As he gasps for breath, a strand of the stuff lands in his mouth, and he chokes it up. We can hear the faint rattling of the chain below six feet of chocolate. Finally, the inexorably rising chocolate passes over his mouth, and he shuts his eyes as he tries to hold his breath for just a moment or two of extra life. But by the time the chocolate reaches his hairline, a brief burst of chocolate and stale breath bursts from the brown liquid, and his hands beat at the air for a few moments until they fall limply into the muck.

That's what I call "death by chocolate."

Harlan,
Minor correction and a question. The correction is that Block edited MASTER'S CHOICE of which you selected Futrelle's work. BEST AMERICAN MYSTERY STORIES OF THE CENTURY was edited by Tony Hillerman of which your The Whimper of Whipped Dogs is included. By the way, both books do what most anthologies do not: Give us a taste of what we haven't seen and also, rarer feat, all of the stories are good. Some are even great.

(Also, someone asked awhile back about Harlan's Hemingway reference in his introduction to Futrelle's story: "...if Hans had said I was sitting next to ErnestfuckingHemingway it couldn't have collapsed me more throroughly." I mention this now and not then because I didn't have the book in front of me when the question was asked and forgot about it until Harlan's reference below.)

The question is this: As a screenwriter, how much input will you allow from an outside source in regards to the way in which the screenplay is written? I mean, I was listening to Soderbergh and Gaghan's commentary for Traffic the other night and it struck me that theirs was very much a collaborative effort in regards to structure and some of the scenes. We've all heard the horror stories of screenplays being abused by hacks, but at what point does the screenwriter allow him or herself to welcome the input from a director or another writer or producer? (And it's not always the case with Soderbergh--not a hack--who does his commentaries with the writer. Check out the commentary on The Limey and you'll hear that Dobbs wasn't too keen on some of the changes Soderbergh made to what was written.) Maybe this is all relative and the answer is "It depends on who you're working with", but have you every found yourself in a situation where you welcomed input from a director or producer and you thought their input made the end result better?


By the way, Rob and Chris and Frank, One Hour Photo was not a good movie. The only thing that kept it from being just above mediocre is Williams' fine understated performance. Now, the original Insomnia was a good movie and the remake was pretty good, too. Reason being is that the remake didn't set out to just remake the movie, but to interpret the main character differently or, rather, to look at the events from a different angle.

"My name is Jim, but most people call me...Jim"

What 1974 comedy did that line some from?

"L"

USA
Ah yes, I do read what you write and you do belong with Poe, Melville, Dostoevski, Conrad, Austen, Dickens and Chaucer.

Dorman is a peach of a guy-- sends the lovliest roses I have ever seen.

Today has been abyssimal ( however the hell ya spell it) I seem to have managed to piss everyone off. The Mayor, the City Administrator and their choice of the candidates for city commissioner-- are snapping at my arches. They called in to complain to my boss about what they heard in town that I had
said.

My report was righteous-- I told only the truth. The hit dogs howl loudly tonight and tomorrow I feed them their lunch-- as Stephen King would say. I have one that's been taped and delivered and there is no turning back.

Fuck 'em... they have it comin'.

Cindy

Yes, in addition to reading all 45 of the stories Futrelle wrote about The Thinking Machine (including the most famous one, "The Problem of Cell 13," which I selected for the Lawrence Block BEST MYSTERIES OF THE CENTURY book -- the description of which by one of you who read it when he was 11