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Diana <dleeg9@yahoo.com>
Hi Chuck,
Thanks for caring. My friend didn't get a decent defense. He's not being offered the chance to defend himself. He's being told to do what is always done here Shaft-You County, CA...He's being told to "cop a plea". Everybody does it. Everybody. It doesn't matter if you're innocent or not. No one really gives a shit. I realize you probably can't grasp just how bad it is around here. And there's no reason for any of y'all to care. But it's VERY bad around here. It's a f'ckin' nightmare. If you can't afford an attorney, and if you're charged with a crime, you do time, or you do community service. End of story. Only he's not going to make it in prison. He's a dwarf. A "freak". And he's a genius. And a virtual recluse. They'll destroy him in there.
I have to go feed my son. He's finally decided to come home, 'cause he's hungry. Bye for now.
Diana
Chuck: BLAM!
Be careful what you ask for, you just may get it.
---Peter
Okay, so I'm posting a lot. Shoot me.
Brian,
I had a look at your Flashman site. I only got a glance, but I'm going back to get a better look. What I saw was very interesting. I've read Fraser's non-fiction book, THE HOLLYWOOD HISTORY OF THE WORLD. That's where I first read about the Flashman novels. I've wanted to start reading some, but I've got a few more books to finish before I get to them. I LOVED his treamtent of the Musketeers films - the authentic touches in the script only added to both movie's versimilitude. I also enjoy the broad humor, sly humor, right down to the grumbling of the servants. I imagine Flashman has the same kind of historical veracity and humor of the Musketeers, only more so.
Chuck
Diana,
Sorry to hear about your friend being charged with murder. It sounds like a bogus accusation. I hope your friend gets a decent lawyer. It seems the most vulnerable among us gets ganged up on the most. Here's to a quick end to his/her troubles.
And, your worries.
Chuck
Harlan,
I feel I must point out a glaring mistake in your latest posting. I usually don't do this sort of thing, especially with your august self.
Still, it WAS an error on your part.
"...if you aren't too unhinged by actually doing a little *work* and READING THE STORY..."
Really. Work? Reading A Boy and His Dog is a distinct pleasure. One these little ankle-biters have not yet experienced. Perhaps someday they'll realize there is an effective remedy for their condition: read the goddamn story, for chrissakes.
So watch your ass. I'm keeping my eye on you, Ellison.
Chuck
Eric,
[[beth
Duluth, MN USA - Thursday, January 30 2003 8:7:30
I just recently WATCHED THE FILM (caps mine) "A Boy and His Dog" and am interested to know why cannabalism was not running rampant in the post-halocaustic culture? If it was undertaken with such nonchalance by Don Johson in the movie, why wasn't it more prevalent throughout the film?]]
Beth did mention she saw the film, not 24-48 hours after others in the class made similar posts. She had the same location, Duluth. It's really not that big a stretch to conclude she was just another student.
People here were actually rather helpful with some of their responses to the previous inquiries, one or two of which showed at least a LITTLE insight. I'd say Harlan was doing a bit of a slow burn over these posts, and Beth was the last straw. This group wasn't being all THAT snarky to these latest victims from the "wuss class".
Yes, we can all just get along. Just don't poke the webderlanders with a stick. Especially the Ellison. One might get a well-written roasting. Nothing to die from, though.
Chuck
To Whom It May Concern:
I'm very upset now. I just found out that a friend of mine, who I haven't communicated with in a while has been charged with murder. His mother, basically killed herself, she starved herslf to death. (She was mentally ill) Anyway, he's been charged with manslaughter. And believe me when I tell you this isn't someone who's in any way capable of dealing with prison. Physically, or mentally. He's a "little" person, I guess is the present PC term for it these days. And brilliant. And talented. And shy. And reclusive.(I'd give y'all the url for the on-line gallery that has some of his art work on view, but then you'd all know his name. I mean I don't think I have a right to expose him like that)
He's not guilty. And he's broke. His main source of income is from where he works part-time as a janitor in a local art supply store. So he's depending on a public defender.
He's very very tired. That's how he seems. Tired, and scared, and small. I wish I could help him. He's in a lot of trouble.
There' nothiing I can think of to do.
Bye for now.
Diana
To Ms. P.A.Berman:
See, it's not just me. You understand. Don't you just love when he does that (whatever it is) THING, he does? I know I do. It relaxes me. Sam Kinison had the same effect on me. He was so damned fierce and nasty that he calmed me down.
And haven't most of us had to do that "thing" ourselves on occasion? I know I have. As kind of a last resort when I've been trying to be polite to somebody who insists on talking to me, like when I'm waiting for a bus, or something. And they persist in being annoying. And I keep being polite but I keep getting more and more annoyed, because they keep bothering me, and then finally I lose it, and I say something. And then they stop talking atogether. Such a relief.
Most of us have had to do it at some point. It's self-defense. So why act all..."Oh, he's so very harsh" like you're surprised and shocked when H.E. does it?
I even needled him the other day to get him to do it some more. Which, of course he did. And it was good. You know y'all loved it.
Bye for now.
Diana
Peter, sorry, yes, I know the difference between homophones and homonyms. Just feeling punchy-- I graded 300+ English Regents in 2.5 days, and wrote a sestina to boot, not to mention getting in a car accident somewhere in the middle. Enough to fry anyone's circuitry.
I sent the sestina. Thanks.
PAB
Y'know, only a few years after I first met Harlan, I was at some convention up in Canada where he was on a panel. Someone was all upset over "A Boy and His Dog" then, too. The only cannibalism I witnessed was when Harlan chewed the woman's ass off and spit it out.
This would about 1970. Think about that. Here's a story that was immeidate enough to upset people in 1969, and it's still upsetting people over 30 years later. Harlan, you should be quietly proud. Or noisily so, if you prefer.
I just corrupted my 14-year-old daughter with "Repent, Harlequin! Said the Ticktockman." Even her English teacher loved that one. Must not be upsetting enough.
Oh, and feel free to send the sestina my way if you'd like.
---Peter
P.A. Berman:
No, you *can* change nouns into verb form. Which is what I meant about words with various meanings: homonyms. It's the homophones, like they're, there, and their which are cheating. They can be the same word with different meanings, or even different tenses of the verb form, but they cannot be different words that sound the same but are spelled differently. No to, two, and too.
Example of what you can use. Turn Right. It's Right. I'll Right (that wrong). Her Rights. These are all valid ends.
Example of what not to use. Turn right. I write. Are homophonous, not homonymic, therefore don't count.
I hope this clears things up. Noun to verb form homonyms and verb tenses are OK.
---Peter
Re: the flock of students-- How 'bout this? We let Mr. Ellison eviscerate whomever he feels needs to have their guts aired out. After all, it is his story they're slandering, plus, when he gets his snark on, we love him for it, don't we? I pop corn and watch (a bit of schadenfreude-- you know you do it too).
We, for our part, can direct them to the appropriate portions of the archive if we wish. Direct them to the novella. Or (here's a radical idea)-- ignore them. The only risk in that is that we could miss out on a potential Zoe, but really, how could anyone ever top Zoe anyway?
Bermanator
Eric- The professor is NOT teaching Ellison, in fact. He's showing a movie that's based off of one of his books, but regretably doesn't let the students know this. He specifically tells the students that the movie is Harlan's and that questions about interpretation of the MOVIE should be directed here. In fact, it's an assignment to post questions about the movie here. Furthermore, the PROFESSOR HIMSELF attributes the movie to Harlan Ellison, or at least did when I took the course. That is teaching incorrect information. It would make far more sense to have the students read the story _and_ watch the movie and THEN post thoughts/questions/comments here. Or just read the story. Harlan authored the story and not the movie - that should be an advertised fact in the coursework. It's not. Obviously.
And personally, I think if someone went up to Harlan in a bar/restaurant/whatever, and asked about "his" movie "ABAHD", the poor chap would be likely to get his or her head lopped off, stir fried with the brains, handed back and sent on his or her way with the bill for the food.
See? I can learn.
--Zoë Rose
>But coming on the heels of a couple others who admitted coming from a class<
Well, I must have missed that. But my last point, I hope, stands: they're here. They could be anywhere else...L. Ron Hubbard's site? Or maybe a discussion on the latest Michael Crichton treatment, excuse me, book?
It's like the car-and-driver syndrome. The same people we scream and curse at on the highway, we'd be polite as pie to in the supermarket checkout line. It's easy to fry the students online, and bash there teacher (who IS, I might add, teaching Ellison...mine never did), but were we all at a bar, and some kid came in and asked the same questions, the responses would be a little warmer, methinks.
The Internet is a cold place.
For crying out loud. Anybody who knows anything about Harlan Ellison knows how he gets sometimes. So what? He's LIKE that. He can be sharp, and cutting, and impatient. So what? MUST he be "explained" to people? Like, "He's really a Good Beast. Never you mind his shiny fangs and the blood dripping from his muzzle. HE had REASONS for eating that man's liver. GOOD reasons. You'll see"
("If you live through the night!"
I don't think he's all that "terrible" anyway. I like it that acts the way he acts. I think he's funny. I don't think he needs explaining. You either enjoy his shit, or you don't. Like a friend of mine always says sometimes, "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke"
Of course, maybe it's just me.
Diana
Peter: Thanks so much for your URL and for posting your excellent sestina. I actually had done a lot of what you recommended instinctively--I made a map with numbered words and set up the words on the map. From there it sort of wrote itself.
I stayed up WAY too late last night banging it out (it wouldn't let me sleep until it was complete).
A question: you said you're NOT allowed to switch an end word from a noun form to a verb form? Really? That hurts. I don't know if I can do that. Also, the iambic pentameter is a hell of a challenge. I take it you can have a few lines that deviate from the meter, yes?
If I get this poem to a fairly decent state, can I send it to you for a critique?
Thanks,
Bermanator
Eric said:"Lynn, re: the Duluth address. I suppose, given the history, that your chances at the crap table are greatly improved. But it's still an educated guess that Beth was coming from class, and it's no proof that any court would honor."
But coming on the heels of a couple others who admitted coming from a class where they watched the movie and were told to pester us with questions would constitute this as a pattern, and while still circumstantial, is a hell of a lot more than just an educated guess.
---Peter
Lynn, re: the Duluth address. I suppose, given the history, that your chances at the crap table are greatly improved. But it's still an educated guess that Beth was coming from class, and it's no proof that any court would honor.
Given that just under 100% of the world's population does not read Ellison, or see films based on his work, I would think it prudent to treat the precious few who do with a tad more kindness, regardless of where they came from or why they're here. After all, Webderland does not enjoy a glut of participants. Indeed there are times, days even, that the Brady Bunch fields a larger team.
One last thing - just as an FYI: Most - not all, but most - of the students don't ever return to the Webderland (or any other author's forums we were required to post at) to see if they'd gotten a response. Ever. In other words, many of these finely worded exposes on the stupidity of certain students, professors or classes are in vain. Though they did get me to stay, somehow. Some perversion of being attracted to verbal slaughter, I guess. But just FYI, that's what I discovered when talking to other students in the same course. They'd post and forget.
--Zoë Rose
Hey all,
I just want to say I /did/ forward a copy of Harlan's "helpful" diagnosis of my "goddamned cleverness" to the instructor in question at the University of Minnesota - Duluth when I was taking the same course as Beth and friends. And he did say he would look into reorganizing how that particular assignment was supposed to work. I did my part! And yes, he did express sympathy at the response I received. What I'm not sure he got from my e-mailed suggestions to him is that folks here - most notably, of course, our patron author - don't /like/ having the movie associated with Harlan Ellison. The story, yes. The movie, no. /I/ certainly got the message. Heh. How could I miss it?
But I did try.
I'm just smiling now, remembering something about "eviscerated corpses" and "like the daughter I never wanted" from my own, personal "correction". Aaah. Memory lane, as someone said earlier.
Onto another line of thought - my dad sent me a rather amusing e-mail containing the song "If you're happy and you know it..." except, instead of "clap your hands" every line ends with "bomb Iraq". It's funny, whatever your views are on the subject. It's long though (about 6 verses), so if you'd like to see it just drop me an e-mail.
--Zoë Rose
I thought H.E. was just trying be helpful to Beth & Co. What'd he say that was all that harsh? It looked to me like he was just being his usual irascible, but lovable self.
Ignorance and arrogance are curable conditions. Those kids have been blessed. They've been given a diagnosis by Ol' Doc Ellison himself. They can go fix what ails 'em, now that they know what's wrong. That's a good thing
Diana
Stupid quote of the week:
“The al–Qaida network is not America’s most dangerous enemy, To fight only the al–Qaida enemy is to miss the terrorist network operating within our own borders. Who are these traitors? Every rotten, radical left-winger in this country, that’s who."
--Michael Savage.
David~ Sounds like something from Ted Kaczynski's rambling manifesto, or something that Osama might publish. Either that, or it's a clambake reference.
I'm really curious to know where it originates now...
L.
Eric~
Actually, the professor in question and the university in question are in Duluth, MN, which in fact, Beth's post did advertise. And after such a long time, if the prof hasn't warned his students to approach this board with care, then the roast fest is fair and not uncalled for.
L.
Frank:
Thanks for clearing that up for me. I was so confused and stuff. :=)
Diana
You think you're the first gibbering, ill-informed, arrogant but essentially dopey student we've had to slap around on this site? We've been visited by your predecessors for years.
-Harlan Ellison
I just love memory lane.
-Benjamin A.A. Winfield
Not to take issue with the Webderland Welcome Wagon, famed throughout cyberspace for its ritualistic ka-bobbing of hapless newbies, but nowhere in Beth's smallish post do I find any reference that she watched the film for a class.
A university e-mail address is hardly evidence for a slacker professor fobbing off film over literature. Perhaps the roast-the-teachers cauldron was fired up a little too quickly this time?
Diana, a song is a composition, and a composition is a song--get it? ;-)
-----------
Someone may need to find a suitable skin grafting clinic for our Beth.
"I have stepped into a world; a barren city which seemed at first as if it were a fortress against me. I built bridges over troubled waters, overcame obstacles that seemed sure to kill me, brought in resources unavailable to most and learned to maintain a lifestyle of success and pleasure without surrender to virtue. Be the keys any other than patience and will, then I am blind and vulnerable. One must accept the illusion that the roadblocks aren't there and seek out the dreams which their heart draws in. When I die I shall find peace! I will carry it with me then as I do life now. Our average people are untouchable to fate, immortal to suicide, and immovable to reason. I am a child, an angel to a lesser god and destined to heaven's ghetto. There is a challenge here; it brings forth a whole new army but I have a trick up my sleeve and a war to attend."
from _Yes I Can!_ by Carrot Top.
Rick, it might be time to add an FAQ on "A Boy and his Dog" to the site. I'll take a crack at writing it, if you'd like.
To Beth: Yeah, Harlan's words hurt. But you did make several mistakes, and Harlan's had these same mistakes thrown at him so long that any civility on the matter has worn away. Sure, get angry if you want... but next time, _be prepared_.
Instead, I strongly suggest that you look at your _teacher_ as an evil-minded charlatan. After all, he tried to fob the movie on you as a substitute for the written word. If he was doing his job _right_, you would have read the story, and known what the true ending really was, Thus, _he_ encouraged you, a young, eager student, to step up and ask a dumb question. The fucker _set you up_. I bet he'll sound all sympathetic when you tell him about Evil Harlan. DO NOT BELIEVE HIM.
What you should do, Beth, is read the original story, and write a single-page essay about why the endings of the movie and the story differ, and how it changes the meaning. A finish it with the observation that the teacher was WRONG to present the movie as the equivalent of the story. Hand it out to your classmates. Perhaps they'll be warned about this bottom-feeding charlatan, too.
Let your school feel your wrath, Beth. Give vent to your own Inner Harlan. Just come back and tell us about it when you do.
To David Loftus:
I believe those were the lost verses for that 1970's musical classic, "Yummy, Yummy, Yummy, (I Have Love In My Tummy)"
But I'm not sure. So don't quote me on that.
Diana
A friend asked if I recognized the following passage. I don't. Anybody else know what it's from?
I have stepped into a world; a barren city which seemed at first as if it were a fortress against me. I built bridges over troubled waters, overcame obstacles that seemed sure to kill me, brought in resources unavailable to most and learned to maintain a lifestyle of success and pleasure without surrender to virtue. Be the keys any other than patience and will, then I am blind and vulnerable. One must accept the illusion that the roadblocks aren't there and seek out the dreams which their heart draws in. When I die I shall find peace! I will carry it with me then as I do life now. Our average people are untouchable to fate, immortal to suicide, and immovable to reason. I am a child, an angel to a lesser god and destined to heaven's ghetto. There is a challenge here; it brings forth a whole new army but I have a trick up my sleeve and a war to attend.
I love you Mr. Ellison...you're soooo mean.
That one has "locked post" written all over it.
REPLY TO BETH & HER CLASSMATES:
There is NO cannibalism in "A Boy and his Dog," neither in the novella as I wrote it--which, if you aren't too unhinged by actually doing a little work and READING THE STORY would benefit you enormously--nor in the film as you viewed it. You are a slovenly observer. Go back, read and/or view; and ask yourself the question WHO ACTUALLY EATS THE MEAT? This small effort on your part will free you of the misconception that cannibalism is even present in the story . . . or the film, for that matter.
And would the rest of you here in Webderland PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE direct these ignorant kids, playing at getting an education, to the proper archive sites so they can see what all their little classroom predecessors have absorbed long since?!?!
PLEASE.
As for Beth and the two/three others who've lazily manifested themselves here of late, yes, your instructor is at it again; and I've even spoken to him, and asked him to cease taking the idiot route of trying to let a little light into your student heads by the moronic viewing of a movie, when the actual literary artifact serves better, and is readily accesible.
You think you're the first gibbering, ill-informed, arrogant but essentially dopey student we've had to slap around on this site? We've been visited by your predecessors for years. Some have been (happily for me) so insulted, so shat-upon, so disrespected and blown off, that they've limped out of here like the simians they are. But a few--and Zoe is a loveable example--have perceived that they weren't as goddam clever as they thought they were, they've put aside the sophomoric "opinions," and they've hung out here (to their pleasure and betterment) for a considerable length of time. But do not perceive of yourself, Beth, as a rare jewel, existant in the universe in the number of one: this crap has been going on with your classmates for years.
So show this post to your instructor, and go delight yourself by obtaining a copy of the story 'A Boy and his Dog," and READ IT, read what you need to get your opinion some gravitas. Do your homework, even for a wuss class like this. Or. The other choice is equally salient in my view: piss off.
Charmingly, Harlan Ellison. Author of the STORY "A Boy and His Dog' but NOT THE AUTHOR of the film "A Boy and His Dog," two different things, except to people who think they're entitled to their opinion, rather than being entitled to their INFORMED opinion.
Looks like Townshend has a reasonable alibi now.
CNN is reporting that he has saved email exchanged with an organization that fights child porn and they knew he was looking into it for research.
While I still have my doubts (why didn't he mention this before now?) it shows he at least took steps to secure a lifeline out of the abyss.
---
OH - AND GET THE "A BOY AND HIS DOG" DVD!!!!! It'll answer a lot of questions!
By george, I think Zoë's old prof is at it again.
---Peter
I just recently watched the film "A Boy and His Dog" and am interested to know why cannabalism was not running rampant in the post-halocaustic culture? If it was undertaken with such nonchalance by Don Johson in the movie, why wasn't it more prevalent throughout the film?
Diana wrote:
"I went back and looked at your site some more. It's very well put together. Well organized. I'd never heard of Flashman before.
Although I suspect there might be something a little hoax-y about it all, I still found it interesting. Creating this mysterious character who had all these adventures would be a good vehicle for exploring an era. So whether he was real, or not, I still enjoyed finding out about him. Besides, some people have had interesting lives and done amazing things, and yet never got to be famous, so who knows? He could have been a real guy. And you did a great job of designing the site. I liked the colors and the graphics too."
Thanks. You are actually _very_ close to realizing something here. But all I can say is that I did not create Flashman.
Look under "George MacDonald Fraser" at the local bookstore. (Or buy them through my website.) And, if you get a chance, watch Richard Lester's _Three Musketeers_ movies from the mid-1970s, and note the screenwriting credit.
From www.cantonrep.com. Producer Avi Arad on THE HULK movie:
"Usually a director like Lee, an intellectual, reacts to a story he can tell," Arad says. Once he understood that the Hulk represented metaphorical anger and rage, Arad says, "he loved the idea." Audiences should think of it as "an art film with amazing action and a big budget," he adds.
Oh yeah, you WISH, Avi!
HEY< ALEJANDRO RIERA:
"Humanoids Publishing will pick one fan to interview Alexandro Jodorowsky, the internationally acclaimed filmmaker and author of The Incal and The Metabarons comics.
To be considered, go to the discussion board at www.humanoids-publishing.com and post why you feel you deserve to interview Jodorowsky."
Figured this might interest you ...
BACK TO COMIC BOOK MOVIES: Did you guys notice that AMERICAN SPLENDOR, about cartoonist Harvey Pekar, won the Best Film prize at the Sundance Film Festival?
BRIAN: I've always seen Flashman as the literary brother to Laumer's Retief.
(Hey--both of those would be good candidates for the "fictional dinner companions" thread on the Pavilion ...)
Brian:
I went back and looked at your site some more. It's very well put together. Well organized. I'd never heard of Flashman before.
Although I suspect there might be something a little hoax-y about it all, I still found it interesting. Creating this mysterious character who had all these adventures would be a good vehicle for exploring an era. So whether he was real, or not, I still enjoyed finding out about him. Besides, some people have had interesting lives and done amazing things, and yet never got to be famous, so who knows? He could have been a real guy. And you did a great job of designing the site. I liked the colors and the graphics too.
I love photographs from that time, all black & white and kind of grainy and nostalgic looking. I'm especially fond of pictures of New York City from the Victorian Era.
Bye for now.
Diana
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:
Although only ten percent of the population is left-handed, twenty percent of the members of MENSA are left-handed.
Diana
(no I'm not left-handed, my son is)
(plus he's part of the even rarer two percent of left-handed people where neither parent is left-handed)
(I just felt like sharing)
Fuggit. Y'all can check out my one attempt at a sestina on my web log. http://home.pacbell.net/posul
---Peter
Last thing about that pattern: I find it easiest to map it out first, so you know which words go where. And if that table isn't helping (each line being a stanza until the tercet, in which each line is a line) try and remember it this way. 1 to 6 to 3 to 5 to 4 to 2. Every line with a 2 will become a 1. Every line with a 6 will become a 3. Every line with a 5 will become a 4.
---Peter
Bermanator: Sestina...
Oh what a bastard of a form that be.
Nine times out of ten, any poetry market that does not accept sestinas has an editor who absolutely cannot write one to save his or her life.
Tips...
Choose your six words first. The best advice for word choice is to break it down like a story. Choose two words as your main plot, or image, choose two for a subplot or image, and choose two which can interchangably support the other four. Also, choose words whose meanings you can play with. Homonyms are okay, but homophones are cheating.
Take for example, the word "ride." You can use it in both the noun and verb meanings, also if using the verb form you can play with tenses. "Her ride" and "she rode" are both acceptable. However, "she rode" and "the road" are not acceptable.
Next, is to number the words for the first stanza. Decide which ones will come first, second, third, through sixth, because how you rearrange them is how the sestina is formed.
Now, the pattern is
123456
615243
364125
532614
451362
246531
And while there are a couple ways of finishing off, the one I'm most familiar with is a tercet (three line stanza) with the words appearing in the lines in the following order
12
34
56
Of course, Iambic Pentameter is the preferred meter for a sestina.
So there you have it, sestina in a nutshell. If you need more, feel free to email me. Plus I've actually completed one of those monsters, if you'd like a look-see.
---Peter
Brian,
Your Flashman site is wonderful! I was fascinated by the man's tale-- all the while recalling a certain deputy sheriff that we had here for a time. We called him Pecos Tom-- (as in Pecos Bill)
He had single handedly defeated a gang of the notorious Texas biker gang, the Bandidos in San Antonio. He'd been in knife fights with drug dealers and he'd been the darling of whores from one end of Texas to the other... never mind he was built like Homer Simpson and had the face of a Texas Aggie mascot-- which he WAS the model for ( no doubt). In my favorite of all his tales he "rode up on a mountain lion, horseback, and managed to lassoo him". My son's favorite Pecos Tom quote, " I killed that ol' turkey tom with my slingshot from 80, no more'd'n twenty yards."
Not that Flashman wasn't the real deal.. he just put me of a mind of Pecos Tom. Flashman's memory sounded like that of an 80 something year old person.. they tend to get things mixed up at times. My own grandmother ( yes, you all have heard aaaalll about her) she's going to be 101 in March. She lives by herself on her farm. I saw her not too long ago and she would look at me and say, " You sure look like Cindy." And I'd smile and say, " Well, there's a REASON for that, Tabby-- I AM Cindy!" And she laughed and patted my leg and said, " I must be gettin' like my old Uncle Herm-- when he got up around 90 he'd make a mistake and say, " I must be slippin'". A little bit later she'd look at me and say, " You sure look like Cindy." And I'd laugh and explain again that there was a reason for that similarity.
Still she remembers things that happened when she was four years old with absolute clairity. She won't tell stories about the past unless she is asked something specific.. but in those cases she can tell you things that went on in rural Texas-- as she lived it, from about 1906 on. During the depression government men came in and slaughtered everyone's cattle and buried them... except for the milk cow which they allowed them to keep. I learned later that some believed it was done to drive up the price of cattle by limiting the supply- but I don't know if that was a fact.
The thing about your Flashman is he could have been telling mostly the truth as it happened mixed in with some of the truth as he remembered it. Did you see that recent program-- I think it was on the discovery channel-- where scientists set out to determine the veracity of certain pages of a diary written by a man from Mexico who was allegedly at the Alamo? I bet the science is there to prove or disprove alot of the Flashman saga. If you'd really want to know. I don't know though.. in some ways it's sort of fun to imagine Homer Simpson fighting Bandidos with a knife.
I really did enjoy your site. It's lovely to look at and the writing is fine as frog hair.
:)
Cindy
Hey Diana,
Thanks for the information! I might have to try my hand at website construction too.
:)
Cindy
Damn you, Bermanator. I have never truly worked the Shakespearean sonnet out of my system, and you reveal to me the sestina?!
Shit.
Cursed by language, I remain faithfully yours,
elldot
To Harlan Ellison
P.P.S. If you find the time, I found Pirates of Darkwater at TV Tome, but neither you or Paul Williams has been credited for your voice work for any of the episodes. If you ever find the time and feel so inclined and you can tell me what episodes you and Paul played what characters in I can go and add this information to TV Tome's Pirates of Darkwater files. I'd especially like to be able to add the credits to Mr Williams information at that site since I'm his Person Editor there.
Bye for now.
Diana
Anyone here ever written a sestina? I just read Elizabeth Bishop's and was very impressed. I want to try to write one, but am daunted. Any tips?
Brian~ Reminds me of Prokofiev's Lt. Kije, an officer whose meteoric rise and subsequent demise were all due to a misunderstanding by the Czar (and his officers unwillingness to correct him).
L.
To Diana, who wrote:
"I went to see your site. I was a little leery at first, as it was called "FLASH" man, but it turned out to be okay. Is he a real historic figure or did you invent him?"
This question has come up often enough for me to have written a page devoted to it, i.e., are the Flashman Papers genuine, or just a cunning fake. The page is available at
http://www.briansiano.com/flashman/HTML%20Files/Are%20They%20Genuine.htm
I cannot claim to have settled the controversy, but I can honestly state that I did not invent Flashman.
Hey Brian.
I went to see your site. I was a little leery at first, as it was called "FLASH" man, but it turned out to be okay. Is he a real historic figure or did you invent him?
I didn't have time just then to look into things much. I can't find my bank card and until I do I'm going to be a crazy person. My house has been getting cleaner and cleaner as I search, though so that part's good. I do the same thing when I'm second hand shopping. I just sort & fold as I dig. That way I don't miss looking at anything. And this practice has the added benefit of causing the nice volunteer ladies to beam at me fondly now when they see me.
That's me. Making the world a more well organized place. A better place. A nicely sorted and color coordinated place.
I'll look at more stuff at your site once I find my card.
Bye for now.
Diana
I strongly recommend buying, renting the DVD version of the film which features a commentary track by director LQ Jones. In it, you will find the secrets of the universe. Check out amazon.com for details.
Should you be looking more into the meaning behind the original work, I strongly suggest reading the story...or at least listening to Ellison read it on tape if words hurt your head.
Oh, Diana, here's a website I developed for one of my fan interests:
http://www.briansiano.com/flashman
Hope ya like.
To Mr. Ellison (again)
P.S. (Just in case it wasn't clear from any of my last posts to about this) I appreciate your taking the time to bother yourself with my project to the extent you have. There's really no reason you should. There's really no reason *I* should, actually. I took it upon myself to begin with. For the hell of it. But since I am doing it, I figure I might as well do a decent job of it. It's not really very important in the larger scheme of things, though. So, thank you for your time and attention to this matter. I know you're damned busy with your own life. It's very nice of you to trouble yourself with (what has become) part of mine. :=)
Bye for now.
Diana
Harlan Ellison wrote(among other things):
"HARLAN ELLISON
- Wednesday, January 29 2003 9:2:5
DIANA:
PIRATES OF DARK WATER had nothing to do with Sweden save as, likely, a foreign rebroadcast under syndication of the AMERICAN animated series. I have no idea what "sources" you consulted, but I suspect they were internet. Most of those sites are bullshit. Incomplete, inaccurate, misleading. Go to a book of reference on tv network shows, animated or otherwise, and you'll find all you need to know about PIRATES, on which I worked with Tim Currey, Frank Welker, and Paul.
Go back to books, dearie. The web lies and misleads.
Staunchly, Harlan Ellison"
If anyone has any book titles to suggest that cover anything even slightly related to the above subject, their input would be appreciated by me.
To Harlan Ellison:
Yes, my source for the information was the internet, and what information there was was pathetic. At best. I'd like to know the name of the character(s) Paul Williams did the voice work for on that program, by the way, speaking of a lack of accurate information.
Maybe someone with time on their hands and a mind near festering with boredom (me) could consider remedying the above mentioned, "Incomplete, inaccurate, misleading" condition on the internet, just a little. I need something to do. And I'm only using about 12 percent of the space I'm paying for at Homestead at the moment, and half of that is being used for nonsense pages I made up because I was bored (and I like playing with fonts)
Of course if I could get someone to pay me for such an effort, all the better, but I'll probably do it anyway. (Who would pay me for such an effort? I want to know. I'm really, really tired of being poor now. Really, really, really tired)
Diana
Diana (and for the curious):
"Pirates of Dark Water" can currently be found on Cartoon Network. Admittedly, it airs at 4 am EST on Sunday mornings... but it's there.
And has anyone used Cartoon Network's schedule on the web? They identify not just the show that's airing, but the episode as well; for shows with multiple shorts (the Chuck Jones Show, for example), they name all the shorts contained in the segment.
(It's so easy to push my geek buttons these days... but catching "Ali Baba Bunny" again just got a WHOLE lot easier...)
DIANA:
PIRATES OF DARK WATER had nothing to do with Sweden save as, likely, a foreign rebroadcast under syndication of the AMERICAN animated series. I have no idea what "sources" you consulted, but I suspect they were internet. Most of those sites are bullshit. Incomplete, inaccurate, misleading. Go to a book of reference on tv network shows, animated or otherwise, and you'll find all you need to know about PIRATES, on which I worked with Tim Currey, Frank Welker, and Paul.
Go back to books, dearie. The web lies and misleads.
Staunchly, Harlan Ellison
Stop me if you've heard this one...
A writer, upon his unseemly demise as a result of a cheese grating accident, takes his place at the Pearly Gates, finding himself in deep discussion with St. Peter concerning his eternal fate. Finally convincing the saint of his worth, he is ultimately granted entrance into heaven. Then, as he is passing through, he wonders about the alternative, and asks Peter if there is some way he can determine what awaited him in Hades, had the Almighty refused him entry.
Peter curses mildly under his breath, then sets about the bureaucratic task to get the proper documentation for a sojourn into hell, or as we mortals call it, marriage.
The task is finally complete, after three weeks of paper chasing with demons, and the writer accompanies St. Peter into peridition. They descend deep into Hell's bowels, avoiding many horrific movements, finally arriving upon the special place in purgatory reserved for the writer. The scribe looks upon rows after rows of tables; poor harried souls chained to benches, typing madly as magma is poured into their throats and continuously beaten with barbed whips as they are forced to create copy for sanitary napkin ads. It takes precious little time for the writer to cry "Enough! Take me from this, I can't stand any more!"
Peter sighs, then sets to the task of the paperwork necessary for the return trip. "Another three weeks in Limbo..." he mutters.
So they are eventually returned to heaven, the writer whistles cheerfully at his anticipated destiny, jovially strolling towards the writer's residence in the Great Beyond. He thinks of meeting Twain, Heller, Plato, Fitzgerald, Wells, all of those he'd so loved and admired. At that moment two angels roughly collect him, and he suddenly finds himself shackled to a bench, typing madly besides row after row of writers, having molten gold poured down his throat as he is flogged mercilessly by angels. All the while, he is forced to create Hallmark greeting card poems, and copy for tracts handed out by Jehovah's Witnesses.
He takes an opportune moment between pourings to cry to an angelic overseer, "Hold it, I thought this was heaven!".
"It is", the angel smiles; "Here you get published, and paid!"
BOS
These are my two favorite NYC links:
http://www.forgotten-ny.com/index.html
http://www.columbia.edu/~brennan/abandoned
Diana
chris pickar: You may want to go to the Webderland forums archive and look at the archives for last January or thereabouts. Poke around a bit in the forum archives running 'Find' searches for 'boy and his dog'--it'll at least give you an idea of the questions people from your class have asked before, along with some of the responses from people on the board.
Jon
Sorry I haven't been around to weigh in on all the recent topics, but I've been working on PR for my book. My first radio interview is coming up in three hours, with Rean Cross on her show "Sex City," out of CIUT 89.5 Toronto. Any of you who are interested and have access to sound through the Web can check it out when it airs live at 2:30 p.m. Eastern, at
http://www.ciut.fm/schedule.html
Joseph,
Check out the Blue Fin while there in NYC. Specifically, sit in the bar area where it's a glass wall so you can watch the bustle of Times Square. It's a sushi place and a bit expensive (which is why I stayed on a strictly liquid diet while there), but if you've got time before a show or just want to hang out and watch the tourists and the office workers, there's worse ways to kill time. You have to get there a bit early (before 6:00pm) so you can get a prime spot by the window, but, hey, it's almost as good as a sidewalk cafe.
MMmm.......Spanakopita!
Thanks for the great suggestions from yesterday, folks! Sorry I'm reading them a little later, but one of my cats decided it would be an adventure to eat seven feet of bootlace. Yes, seven feet. He's ookay now, but we had to go to the emergency vet last night, where they were able to induce vomiting (with a hydrogen peroxide mixture, of all things). If you're a curious cuss, take a look at the x-ray:
http://tinyurl.com/51mr
Regards,
Joseph
P.S. Yes, cats can be real dumbasses, can't they?
> And this place that sells those greeks thingies, made with feta cheese and spinach and fila dough, and what the hell do you call those things?
Spanakopita. "Spinach pie" to you goyim.
Here's a good online guide to the City: http://newyork.citysearch.com/?brand=sidewalk
Gray's Papaya (37th and 8th) has the best hot dogs, at the cheapest prices.
Virgil's BBQ (43rd, btw 6th and 7th) is a lush oasis for carnivores who like-a the spice. Ask if they have the macaroni & cheese.
Rungsit II Thai Food (34th, btw 2nd and 3rd) is a tasty retreat on the east side. Try the duck salad.
Mitch
DIANA: Kinison? Not bad. But no, child; seek out Bill Hicks. TRUST me.
(Or, for the cleaner side of comedy, Lord Richard Buckley.)
To Brian Siano,
Thanks Brian. That tune from The Good, The Bad & The Ugly was his work? I wonder if there were words too. Othewise he's more of a composer than a songwriter.
Diana
Jay,
He didn't say it was a literature class, he said it was a science fiction class, "cultural studies". Certainly science fiction movies and/or movies in general would qualify as a part of our culture worth studying.
Diana
Is it me, or does anyone else find it wrong, stupid and/or ridiculous to be teaching a literature class and requiring the FILM ADAPTATION to be the focus of the discussion?
SOmehow feeling we've had this discussion before, some semester back in time.
Frank (And Etc...)
One name...
SAM KINISON!!!!!!!!!!
Diana
ALL: by the way, if you ARE interested, and you plan to send money, just email me at the above address to make sure I still have a set or two left.
--DTS
ALL: Through means I'm not at liberty to divulge, I have come into ownership of eight (count 'em, 8!) sets of "Harlan Ellison's Dream Corridor," including the "Dream Corridor Special" which kicked off the series, and issues one through 5. What makes these different from the collected, tradepaperback "anthology" (Harlan Ellison's Dream Corridor Vol. One) is that John Byrne's adaptation of "I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream" runs from the "Special" to issue number 4. Before taking them to a local book dealer or someone else (and trying to squeeze some real money out of them), I thought I'd offer the comics for sale to you guys: $25 a set, plus $2 for postage/insurance. If anyone's interested, send checks and money orders to:
D.T Shindler
P.O. Box 9398
Kansas City, MO 64133
Thanks,
DTS
(I would've put all of this in the "store" dept., but since I've gotta get the "library" weeded and cleaned out by next week, I didn't want you guys to miss out on a pretty good deal).
Diana, Ennio Morricone is best known for his work as a film music composer, especially for his soundtracks for such Sergio Leone westerns as _The Good, the Bad and the Ugly_.
Joseph, the subway will place you right at Yankee Stadium. It's elevated.....so you walks on down and you is there.
Don't buy your tickets at the window. Walk around the various parking lots and find yourself a scalper pushing some season ticket holder's leftovers. You can get much better seats than will be available the day of the game, and if you bargain the eentsy beentsiest bit, you can get them for a buck or two below ticket price if you are there for a non-event (Bosox) non-toy-giveaway non-weekend game.
My friends and I would always got to games on Tuesday and Wednesday nights and get the best seats available for the lowest cost by finding our favorite, lovable parking lot felons.
-TODD
Regarding "A Boy & His Dog"
What CHRIS L. said
Diana
(P.S. I LOVE that ending)
Hi Frank...I will look into Ennio Morricone. Do you have any recommendations as to which of his songs to listen to first? Does he do his own stuff? If other people have done good renditions of his music, who?
Diana
BOOK STORES IN NYC(and stuff)
I haven't actually lived in NYC since 1986, but there was a used bookstore that I worked in in the "Tribeca" area called Ruby's Book Sale. I looked it up on the internet just now and the address is listed as:
Ruby's Book Sale
119 Chambers Street
Tel: (212) 732-8676
So I guess they're still in business. But that may be the main store which isn't a used book store, but if it is they can tell you where the used book "annex" is.(I know it's down the street from 111 Chambers Street, where my sister used to live with...get this Bobby (Boris) Pickett!) (Don't you know who Bobby (Boris) Pickett is?)(The Guy Lombardo of Halloween?) (of (that Spooky Day cult classic!") The Monster Mash fame?) (He lives on the West Coast now) (Venice, CA) Anyway they sell used books at Ruby's, & back issue of many odd magazines and who knows-what-you'll-find type stuff. That place on Broadway & 12th is cool too, by the way. Only someone already mentioned it.
As far as lodgings, it's a shame you don't know someone who could put you up for the few weeks you'll be there. You could pay them instead, about half what'd cost you at a hotel. They could show y'all the "real" NYC. Like all these tiny hidden cemetaries I know about in the most unlikely places. And this place that sells those greeks thingies, made with feta cheese and spinach and fila dough, and what the hell do you call those things? Anyway I know where you can get some cheap but good. (right around the corner from Ruby's) Or I used to. Or like THE best Indian food restaurant. Or where you can get amazing clam chowder. Or provolone and proscuitto grilled cheese sandwiches, and espresso at 3AM. Or where you can go see old films like a comedy with Irene Dunn, & Cary Grant, and sit down in a theater and watch them on a full screen, uninterupted by commericials, like they were meant to be seen, so you can find out WHY these people were the major stars they were in their day.
Is it obvious I'm homesick?
Bye for now.
Diana
Used bookstores in Manhattan....?
The monster pops to mind first: The Strand, on Broadway and 12th, I think. Huge, almost all hardcover and trade paperback, not cheap but a very broad selection of non fiction. Not the easiest place to locate stuff--for example, they don't have a Biography section---but the staff knows where the best stuff is buried. They are also locally famous for selling reviewer's copies of recent stuff, typically for half price. Gets very crowded at certain times, but it's worth a look-see, especially if you're into art books.
There are a few smaller ones about a ten minute walk away, around the old Barnes and Noble Main store on 5th and 18th or 20th.
There is at least one, and possibly a second, mystery specialty store in the midtown area, and a military book store on the east side in the 90s. Used and new stuff at both, if memory serves me correctly. Other than Forbidden Planet, which isn't doing much with books any more, I don't know if there are any SF specialty book stores left.
There's a huge B&N on the north end of Union square (figure 18th street--parts of Manhattan are very easy to figure out)and a sprinkling of used bookstores on the east and west side. If you're into it, Hanley's is the best comic book store I've seen. It's also in midtown, and within another ten minutes is Midtown Comics (40th and 7th, I think) which is also very good. There's also some fun Japanese language bookstores(amazing magazines) and foreign places, plus some great magazine stores and the odd specialty places, like for cookbooks, maps, stuff like that, too.
Floating around is a FAQ with bookstore addresses. Last time I looked it was a little out of date for the area, but generally pretty good. Evelyn Leeper comes to mind as the author.
It's just my opinion, but Manhattan doesn't have as many good used places as you'd think for a publishing mecca. I've heard that Avenue Victor Hugo just closed, but I thought at the time that Boston and the surrounding area was even better than NYC for book lovers...
Joseph: there's a decent Travelodge just off Times Square. I've been housed there on college trips and it's inexpensive and clean. Could probably look them up on the Net.
If you're in town on a Monday night, I suggest going to hear the Village Vanguard Orchestra (at the Village Vanguard, of course). They play every Monday (starting time is around 9 I think. They play two sets). Costs about 25 bucks (two-drink minimum; drink tix come with admission) and the band sounds FINE!
Have fun!
John G.,
Thanks for the many suggestions! Steps are not an issue, really (hell, I'm a Chicagoan with no car - walking and the L is my life).
Matthew,
Thanks as well for your suggestion, but somehow I can't use a hostel. I'm 30 in May, and at that point I feel I'm doing well enough that I can spend a little more for a real hotel room. The Best Western is a damn good idea, though; we used them in both London and Dublin in 2000, and they were good utilitarian hotels.
Now. Can anyone suggest any good used bookstores in Manhattan?
Regards,
Joseph
Joseph,
Depending upon the level of comfort and lack of expense you’re aiming for you might want to consider having a look maybe at hostels in NYC. When I was looking last summer I noticed that several offered separate double rooms for couples – rates were usually about $50-70 I think. Some are in quite gentrified areas, or touristy/arts spots like Chelsea, and offer near hotel-level service (breakfast, towels, etc).
Joseph, if you see Rudy Guiliani, kick him in the ass for me. Regards. :-)
Diana, one name: Ennio Morricone.
-----------
Who the fuck said "Sci-Fi"? Get out the boiling oil and the tarring brush. Bring the gonad hammer and the needle nose pliers. Hot glue gun prostate pixilator at stun.
-------------
Cindy, welcome back to the land of the hearing. Avoid heavy metal and mosh pits--for now, at least--I know how much you adore such fare. Be good.
--------------
Diana, doubtful that having a million dollars adds to someones importance. Rush Limbaugh is a millionaire for Christs sake. And remember they gave Elton John an Oscar--the 90's Elton, not the great 70's Elton.
Joseph,
You can take a subway right to Shea and or Yankee stadium. Both require short walks from the stops and if I recall correctly some stairs, if that's a consideration.
What to see in New York City? That's a tough one to narrow down: if you're into live theater, of course there's Broadway, Off-Broadway, and tons of other stuff. Ditto for live music--lots of clubs and such.
The Empire State Building is always fun, even though it's been pretty crowded lately. Gives the best view of Manhattan and is a real experience. Always recommended.
There's the Statue of Liberty, the revitalized 42nd street, famed in song and story, Central Park, lots of fairly cool architecture, the USS Intrepid Air/Space Museum, the Public Library, and lots of good museums, starting with the Metropolitan. Then jaunt across Central Park to the Museum of Natural History, or a nice walk up town to the Guggenheim, or south the the Museum of Modern Art. (The Met alone could eat up the better part of a day)
A good general guide to weekly cultural goings-on is the Village Voice. It's free and I'd be happy to send out a copy.
Hotels are a big more problematic in that it's getting pretty hard to find cheap decent accomodations in midtown. (With a few exceptions, like the ballparks and the Statue, most of what I just listed is "midtown", kinda, well within walking distance). I'd suggest trying some of the Best Western properties--don't quote me but I think one is on 45th and the other 53rd and Broadway--that were pretty good deals for the location. I've paid under $100 a night for them after 9/11, but I'm sure it's more now. There's every type of chain hotel in the area, but most of them are probably in the $150/night range, and some a lot, lot more. In the last ten years or so New York City has become even more of a destination than in the past, so it's crowded and a little too Disney-fied. But you'll always find something unique--I haven't even mentioned Greenwich Village, Chinatown, or anything outside Manhattan.
There's tons of things left, but these are some of the usual destinations. I hesitate to mention it because it really creeps me out, but unfortunately *the* destination in Manhattan these days is the old WTC site. All it is, now, is a big open pit with some walkways around it, but it's mobbed. It's about ten minutes from where you go to take the boat to Liberty and Ellis islands.
Hope this helps.
Please read "subway is" as "subway wise." Thank you.
All,
A small request, if you please. My wife and I are plannign to go to Manhattan this late spring/early summer for the first time, and I'm curious to know what any of you world travellers or inhabitants of the area might consider interesting/essential to see there. Thanks very kindly!
Regards,
Joseph
P.S. Any nice cheap hotel accomodations you can recommend would be quite appreciated as well.
P.P.S. How involved, subway is, is it to get to Shea or Yankee stadium?
**many of my classmates noted that this portrayal of women wrong, and i agree with them on this. **
I'll set aside the issue of whether the film is being mis-read and take at face value the "sexist" depiction of women. But, young man, what you gotta understand is that a writer (particularly a good one) does not impose himself and his world views on every character and on every story. Ellison has another story in which a character shoots a man and "sprays nigger meat" all over. Does that make it a racist story?
A writer's job sometimes is to get inside the head of his characters, to present the world to the reader by way of the perceptual filters of his characters. Thus when Ellison writes a story in which Jack the Ripper is a character, you're going to hear a whole lot of hatred directed at women.
Noting that "this portrayal of women is wrong" is just a nonsense statement. It's completely right if that's what the story is about - if that's how the characters think and feel. It might just mean the writer had done a damn fine job in portraying the fictional world he wished to portray.
Don't confuse the writing with the writer. Don't assume the fictional world must or even should represent the "real" world.
Chris Pickar:
"A Boy and his Dog" is a problematic Ellison work. I haven't seen the movie, and from what I've heard I don't want to, but I personally found the story difficult to love. I would recommend to you and your class that you find other Ellison to read...the short stories written in the late 60s/early 70s would be a great place to look.
Post-nuclear apocalypse fiction is practically its own genre, and some of the best stuff (A Canticle for Liebowitz, On the Beach, the first Planet of the Apes film) is still holding up. I don't think that A Boy and his Dog is a hallmark of that period, either as book or film, and I'm surprised your instructor choose the film. Maybe it's one of those lazy classes where if there isn't a movie of the book, the book doesn't get read. Certainly there are scads of better sci-fi movies out there to spend class time watching.
Then there is the issue of "sexism." It's a hot one, and many on this board, including Ellison himself, have written long expositions on how the story is being mis-read, and how the film is a departure from the themes of the book. But despite that, both the story and the film carry with them that stigma, so I would argue that in this instance there has been a failure to communicate on the part of the artists.
Crack into Deathbird Stories instead. You won't regret it.
Undergraduate degree:
Bachelor in labour relations: MBA as my major.
And I become a rink manager. Go figure.
Brian: You neglected William Safire, writing about how the Neutral Zone impinges on the manifest destiny of laissez-faire capitalism and the needed democratic expansion of the Federation, alongside Pat Buchanan's suggestion that the Tholians are "Soviet Vulcanistan", not pulling their weight in funding Starfleet military expansion to respond to the Klingon "evil empire"...
Of course, we won't touch Ann Coulter's suggestion that the Orion traders should create a cloned candidate for Federation President, fusing native Orion DNA to that of dead US president Reagan, in order to promote a anti-taxation platform for the next election...
BOS
Chris Pickar: "A Boy and His Dog" the movie is the creation of actor/director L.Q. Jones, and based on a story by Harlan Ellison. The two are distinctly different in tone and exposition. Before you query this board, please go find a copy of Ellison's text and read it. You may find it in "The Essential Ellison" published by Morpheus Press, which can be ordered through this site. There is also "Vic and Blood: The Chronicles of a Boy and His Dog" that is out-of-print, but available through this site. Click on resources/store and then on Webderland Store HERC link. Read Harlan Ellison, so you may approach the Hollywood byproduct with an informed opinion.
As a requirement for sci fi class at my college, we were required to view "a boy and his dog." sci fi class falls under the cultural studies program and i have some pretty outspoken classmates. So many people bashed this movie for being sexist, objectifying women, etc... i'm sure that most people picked up on these themes when they watched the movie as well, how could you not. my point all along is that ellison paints a pretty bleak picture of a world after a nuclear war. he doesn't come right out and say "women are pieces of shit," like many of my classmates claimed. vic's character does this for him. and the way ellison portrays vic in this film is far from flattering. by portraying vic in this light, the viewer is able to see from the very opening scenes that vic is more of the animal than blood. many of my classmates noted that this portrayal of women wrong, and i agree with them on this. Duh, we (classmates and myself) live in a free nation and know what is right and wrong because we have been taught these things. but it's not as though ellison portrayed the men in this film in a better light. look at vic for evidence of this. vic's outlandish and animal behavior made everyone take notice and say "whoa, something is not right here, this guy is an idiot." i was probably the only one who thought this movie was good, besides the instructor. film is a piece of art. although you may not agree with some subject matter, it certainly does get a rise out of you. who would want to live in a world like this? I wondered why there were no roving bands of women in this film. this seems like a better alternative to living underground, and there is strength in numbers.
To Alex: You know, the "Job Recommendation Letters" book idea sounds, well, fairly tempting. However, I don't know how well the gag can sustain itself. Might be worth collaborating on...
Take the "Death Row Records" example. In such a book, one would certainly want the letter to appear on something like letterhead-- and having "Death Row Records" at the top would kill the sting of the joke when you read the signature at the end. (Having a prison censor's stamp nearby's a fun idea.)
So what other Letters of Recommendation could there be? How about one for James Boswell, written by Samuel Johnson?
By the way, this reminds me of an odd idea I had for a Star Trek book-- but it'd _never_ sell, because the humor'd go right past the Trekkies. The idea is that, due to some time-matrix-unfuldibuliform refolding accident that occurred when Wesley made twelve-dimensional hypertoast for breakfast, the 24th century momentarily impinged upon the late 20th. While the timelines were eventually resorted out, several artifacts from that rewoven time were recovered by the Federation.
The "artifacts" were, basically, news and commentary accounts of _Star Trek_ stuff written in the manner of 20th century news media. So, we'd see Emmett Tyrell of the _American Spectator_ on those snooty, stuck-up, peacenik Vulcans. Alexander Cockburn might spent a column on James Kirk's depradations in _The Nation_, while Katha Pollitt discusses the beauty crystals Harry Mudd used. William Bennett would call upon the Federation to become more disciplined, more authoritarian, and spend more money on building moral character... because the Klingons were doing so, and they threatened our daily existence, so we have to out-Sparta them.
Meanwhile, Camille Paglia rhapsodizes oner the Klingon rough-boy leather style, while denouncing the Romulans as neurasthenics. A newsletter from PETA would denounce the barbaric and cruel practice of neutering Tribbles. Maybe there'd be a storyboard for an anti-drug spot, illustrating what happens to the people you love when you use the Replicators to make handfuls of Columbian blow. Perhaps a show called "Solved Mysteries," where they use the Guardian of Forever to find out who killed Kennedy and who Jack the Ripper was, while George Will and John McLaughlin demand to know why we don't simply use it to wipe out the entire existence of our enemies.
It's a fun idea, but it's got lots of problems. For one thing, Paramount'd never let it see the light of day; they only allow certain kinds of humor, and this ain't what they like. For another, how many Trek fans are aware of what writers would be parodied?
Anyway, the Trek TV shows are pretty much off the air, so it's kind of a dead subject. Might be fun to do as a _samizdat_ publication.
I don't know about that, Bern - your Kabuki always wowed them in the dining hall...
CEP - They should put up a image page where the the pirate used to exist, showing a pirate flag sliding under the waves, with a simple message: "Pirate my stuff, and this'll be YOU - Yr. Wrst Nghtmr, Harlan and his trusty sidekick, CEP". Good Job!
Diana - congrats on the award(s) - you should update your songlist to include the Muppet movies - and did you see the Superbowl Ad for HotJobs that featured "The Rainbow Connection"?
Cindy - Ow, ow, ow, owwww. Please get better soon, y'hear? (I know, bad pun - but I couldn't help it.)
FAQ - "Why do you write?" - 'cause I can't paint, sculpt, draw, whittle, sing, play instruments or do those darned shadow puppet things worth a damn.
Brian - Funniest damn thing I've read in a while.
Bermanator - Glad to see you back.
All - regarding Heather. I think she's packed up her things and gone home. She was always somewhat disappointed with the lot of us - and for a while she only posted in the Pavillion. And the last time she had done that, her mother had just died, and she wanted Harlan to read and comment on something she wrote in her webspace. Haven't heard from her here since then.
That's it for now,
Bern
P.A.:
Somewhere on the site, there's a .pdf membership form for I-Con to print out. Hotel rates I got straight from the latest HERC Rabbit Hole: $124.00. Realization of the costs effectively put the notion of me going out the window. I hope the rest of you enjoy, though, and come back with some great, detailed stories.
Bill
PAB: I don't have their flyer in front of me, but I recall that the membership fee for I-Con is $35 if purchased before March 15. The only option is by mail, unless you can get to a number of retail outlets on Long Island, and they do *not* take credit cards at the door. Daily memberships are available, but IIRC Saturday was like $33, so buying ahead makes sense.
If no one else has the info at hand I'll dig up the flyer and post the address later today. I also have some hotel info if anyone needs it.
The website has an info email at membership@iconsf.org, too.
HARLAN AND SUSAN: The package arrived today. A million thanks.
(In the interest of preserving the dying art of correspondence, a thank-you note was written and mailed you immediately upon receipt.)
CHARLIE: VERY nice. May you sink many more in the service of His Majesty.
BRIAN: You know, a compendium of such "recommendations" ("Stationary of the Rich and Famous"?) could be easily made into a small yet profitable novelty book. At very least, it would be fun writing it. Go for it.
Re: The Incredible Lightness of Being Philip Jose Farmer...
"Well, yes, there are the Riverworld novels [with Twain and Sir Richard Burton and they have their moments to be sure] BUT there are also any number of novels with sex with aliens and WEIRD sex in general and guys dueling with their penises and carniverous beasts hiding in vaginas. Does this help explain your result? No? But now your really curious, right?"
OK...ewwwhhh.
Something is clearly wrong with the skiffy quiz.
Frankly, I was more comfortable back on the riverboat with the dead guys.
Cindy -
You're expected to get your hearing back, right?
First of all, I'm Kurt Vonnegut, and personally, I'm thrilled. I know, a day late and a buck short on the Skiffy Writers Quiz, but just thought I'd share the love.
Jim: I-Con? I checked out the website, and maybe I just didn't give it enough time, but I couldn't figure out how to sign up and how much it cost. I should consider this, as when will I ever get a chance to meet Mr. Ellison on the Right Coast? Hmmm, who else is going from here? Anyone else LARP?
So James (can I call you James? Thanks), I had to dig through scads of posts to find yours, and got sidetracked into a quiz, etc. You have to tell me what your undergrad degree would have been in. I imagine you could get into a program where you could get certified and get your bachelor's simultaneously, then go on and get Masters later if you like. What subject are you planning on teaching? Here's a link re: Florida's requirements for you:
http://www.firn.edu/doe/bin00022/home0022.htm
Hey, getting started on the career late isn't the worst thing. I got a Bachelor's degree in Industrial & Labor Relations (!!! indeed) thinking I wanted to be a lawyer... but then I realized I didn't want to go to law school after 4 years of Cornell. I drifted about for 7 years, working crap jobs for no money, then went back for the MA due to lack of anything better to do (at SUNY Binghamton by way of Southern California--long story, and not interesting). Realizing this degree was worth not much more than the paper on which it was printed, I got the MAT and now am teaching. I could complain about how much I hate Binghamton and how I have no life here whatsoever, but that would be boring. It sure is.
Someone *SHOULD* start the Webderland LonelyHearts board...
PAB
PS--Whatever happened to Heather?
To Mr. Ellison:
I'd be glad to convey your message to Paul Williams if I could, but I've never meet him. I don't think he even knows that my site (or I) exist. (Maybe _you_ could tell him _I_ say hi, if you ever see him)
I will put your message to him somewhere on the site, though. Maybe one of these days he'll stumble across it and be pleasantly surprised. If you ever feel like signing my guestbook, of course, you'd at least make *me* very happy anyway.
It would impress the hell out a few people too, that's for sure.
Thanks for that information on Pirates of Dark Waters. I'd never heard of that program. I just went and added it to his voice-over credits a little while ago. I found a somewhat pathetic link to some reference to it, which I also added, in case I wasn't the only person unfamiliar with it. It looks like it was on television in Sweden, which may explain why I didn't know about it.
If you ever found the time to share any Paul Williams anecdote's with me (I'm sure I could find a way to use them on my site) I'd be grateful. But I know you're a very busy personage in your own right, so I'll understand if you can't do that. But I thought I'd ask, just in case.
Bye for now.
Diana
Williams a HACK?! He was referring to Williams Doppelganger Warren Zevon. Who has also won awards and is, sometimes, a very nice man as well.
1974 - High Times "Man of Tomorrow" Award
1975 - Fastest Quarter Mile Run While Being Pursued by Hunter Thompson's Attack Dogs in Woody Creek
1977 - "Drink Your Weight in Tequila" Award (O'Hoolihan's Tavern, Boston)
1978 Longest Bender in British History Award
(Guinness, six months edging out Keith Moon by three days)
1998 Most Repeated Song by the Original Artist Who Did Not Go Mad as a Result. (Werewolves of London, Dirk's Dirt Hut #234,878
CHUCK,
Yeah, I'm back. I missed you.
:)
The ear FEELS better-- actually BOTH of 'em feel better. The left one ruptured the day after the right one. Problem is each day I hear a little less than the day before. Today I realized the futility of attending district court-- I couldn't understand a word. Instead I'm reduced to court documents and the minutes from county and municipal meetings. EMAIL is a great source for news when you can't use the phone very well. It sucks because I feel like a genie trapped in a bottle. The good news is I can still hear my own voice in my head so the broadcasts continue. As long as I can do the news and SOUND the same my boss doesn't have a problem. I keep hoping that tomorrow things will be a little better rather than a shade worse.
On the bright side I can't hear my kids when they fight and I'm no longer bothered by a ringing phone.
:)
Cindy
Hi Cindy.
Thanks for your kindly remarks about the web site. If you're interested in creating one of your own and you don't know html I can recommend you look into getting a Homestead account. They have what's called a WYSIWYG (What You See Is What You Get) Drag & Drop program. You can try things out for free for thirty days, and then their accounts start at as little as under $7.00 a month. Plus they have *really* great customer and tech support departments. If there's anything you can't figure out for yourself, whenever you send in a question, a real live, well informed helpful person WILL get back to you. Quickly. They have so much other help available too, I couldn't begin to tell you about it all in here. Do I sound like a TV commercial? Sorry.
Anyway, as for the design aspects, I just read lots and lots and lots of tutorials from the internet. I looked at other people's sites, good & bad. I learned about html, and image editors from other tutorials. And I learned how to convert stuff from my tapes and CD's into MP3's, and then into wavs, and then into COMPRESSED wavs, from yet more tutorials (I don't even have music on that site now, but it's useful knowledge and could come in handy for some other projest) There are sites where you can (I did) go ask for critiques of your site, if you get along to where you want to win web site awards. That was something I found very very helpful. There are places you can do free research on figuring out what are going to be your best meta-tags, which is what you need if you want to have a high rating on search engines. (that's really more important for a business site)Basically that's how I learned stuff. I just looked on the internet for information and tried to follow it. Trust me it's not so hard, as long as you can read. I started out not knowing even so much as what someone meant by "right click" a year & a half ago.
It's really FUN too. You can put whatever you want on your web site. It's yours. I've seen some amazingly cool & creative stuff out there. When I get my "me" site to where I don't mind having people see it you can go check out some of my links, and see for yourself. You'll see what I mean.
Diana
P.S. I'm glad you're not mad
Why write? Because if you don't, the real world and the fantasy world begin to merge. Or am I just insane?
www.ideomancer.com...the Flash Fiction section. It's not much, but others have given links before, so why not?
Bill
Alex Jay,
"(Yes, I want the IRS to give me a gun. Give in to your fear now. Avoid the rush.)"
Of course, they'll only give you one bullet, which you'll have to keep in your shirt pocket. And, if you mishandle the gun once, you'll hear someone say, "Gimme the gun, Barney".
Hey, Cindy!
Nice to see you're back and full o' pee and vinegar. I assume your ear feels much better.
Chuck
Alex Jay -
We'll be holding auditions in the Philly area...possibly Newark Delaware or As far west as Plymouth Meeting...in early March.
More model bodies in Philly anyway. Right now, it's fill-the-tights time. Acting isn't as important as filling the costume.
CEP,
Good deal. And, what Bill said.
Faisal,
The answer? Because you have to. Others cursed with that affliction can avow that they have no choice in the matter. Good or bad, you must write. I thought that was apparent from your postings on this forum and your short screenplay (good, by the way, not bad). It's a stupid question, really. Why do you breathe? Why do you do something that puts you at risk of ridicule or worse? Why do you rip your heart out and show it to those that may not care or may not understand? Why do you hope to connect with words to someone you don't even know? Why do these things knowing you probably won't be wealthy or famous or somewhat known? You know the answer. Why do you breathe?
(And for a much better anecdote concerning why writers write, see the introduction to Prayers to Broken Stones by Dan Simmons. It was written by HE and the introduction is heartbreaking. And very true.)
DIANA: Paul and I know each other for a long time. Many pastel years. We even worked together doing voiceovers on PIRATES of DARK WATER. Just say hello to him for me, tell him I luv'im, and mention that if he has a moment off from his jam-packed social calendar, he might want to give an old pal a phone call. He has the number. You might also mention to him that I called Artie podell and hipped him to Biff Rose's bleat recently. Artie
tried to sell me a car.
Harlan
CEP:
Good job! Turn the muthas out!
Now, to the Batcave!
Bill
Throw open this question to the board. Today I had two interviews as a writer for possible projects for radio and feature films. I got stumped on a question that was asked in both interviews:
"Why do you write?"
And I had to admit, I honestly don't know. It just happens. Any scribes here know why they write? I normally give the answer that its a more useful way to pass time when not having any interest in sports. Incidentally, the interviews went well but I had to admit, I was puzzled by that question.
Also got a rejection letter from another agent, probably due to my lack of enthusiasm for writing for soaps.
FAQ
DIAAAAAAAAAAAAANA,
I wasn't mad. I was playin'! I have long thought Paul Williams was a cool fella and I've never considered him to be a hack. I was just messin'witchoo.
Frankly, I am in AWE of your website-- how'd you DO that? I've been wanting to try and do one but it seems to be decidedly over my bow. Really, how'd you learn to do that? It's a great website-- and I KNOW, I've seen barge loads of bad ones.
still yer buddy,
:)
Cindy
Cindy:
Your mailbox is full. I sent you an e-card, you can pick it up at:
http://www.care2.com/ecards/p/5026-1756-14111-4544
Frank:
All kidding aside, I'd be interested in your suggestions on songwriters.
Diana
To those who "regret" their undergrad degrees:
I run into quite a few people who feel remorse for studying something interesting rather than something useful in college. Even I go through a little of that as I struggle to find employment in this shitty economy. But this is the one true lesson I learned in college: Useful don't get you a thing unless it is interesting.
As some of you may remember, I was an engineering student when I first started visiting this board four years ago. I stuck to it because it was useful, it would get me a job, it was secure. It sure as hell wasn't _that_ interesting to me. Fortunately, I found the courage to jump from the safe train and study something interesting, philosophy, just before the shit hit the fan with my family, and my father started going in and out of the hospital.
If I hadn't switched to philosophy when I did, if I had stuck to engineering, if I had stayed with useful instead of going to interesting, I probably would have dropped out of college, and still have no idea what I want to do with my life. Without interesting, we leave ourselves open for the unhappiness that comes from mediocrity, from not doing for ourselves because we chose utility rather than direction. We don't know where we're going, because it is simply safer to go with the river's flow than to fight against the current.
I may still be searching for work, but I sure as hell know where I'm going in life. I'm going to grad school next year. I'm planning to teach after that. And through it all I've still got that little writing thing I've been working on for the last half-decade. If I had stuck with useful, I don't know if I could have survived, emotionally, mentally, or maybe even physically, the shitstorm that struck mi familia at the end of the millennium, but I sure do know that I wouldn't be where I am today on the path I've set for myself.
This bit of self aggrandizing has been brought to you by the letter P. P...
---Peter
Frank?
Is nothing sacred to you, Frank? You called Paul Williams a hack? Who's next, Frank? Barry Manilow, for chrissakes?
Besides that "hack" is a multi millionaire, who's presently on The Board of Directors at ASCAP. That "hack" was recently inducted into the Songwriter's Hall of Fame, and has, to date, received or been nominated for(just to mention a few) all the following awards:
Awards & Nominations
Composer:
"Evergreen"
(from, "A Star Is Born)
Academy Award,
Grammy,
Golden Globe, Best Song
"A Star Is Born"
Golden Globe, Best Score
"Nice To Be Around"
(from, "Cinderella Liberty")
Academy Award Nomination
"Phantom of the Paradise"
Soundtrack
Academy Award Nomnation
"Rainbow Connection"
(from, "The Muppet Movie")
Academy Award Nomination
"The Muppet Movie"
Academy Award Nomination
Best
How many Golden Globe and/or Academy Awards do YOU have Frank? How many millions of dollars are you worth? When were YOU inducted into the *ANYTHING* Hall of Fame? Huh, Frank? Tell me. I bet your anwsers are "None" and "Never"
Seems to me that "hack" is doing pretty damned good for himself. Plus which, he's a humanitarian, and a philanthropist.
AND, *and*, he's damned nice.
Diana
(P.S. Thanks for the Cossack Quiche remark. That was very flattering)
CINDY!
Girlfriend! I was just kiddin' around. Honest. I didn't mean to piss you off.
(but you're funny as hell when you're mad)
There's no call to be cruel. I agree, Mr. Williams' musical stylings will never compare to The Velvet Frog's, but who's could? Besides, Paul Williams is beloved by millions. I read that at one of his other (not as good as mine) fan sites. It was written down, in plain English, correctly spelled (for the most part) so it's got to be true.
Plus I know it was you that wrote all those monkey love messages to him in my guestbook, so I know you really want him and are just trying to front. I understand. You don't want to come across as easy or anything. There's no need to pretend around me though. I'm your friend. And I understand. He really is cute. In a little love-monkey kind of way. (plus rumors, and some of those other photo's I have of him show evidence that he's actually a kind of human tripod)(if you catch you drift) Never be ashamed of love, Cindiana Jones. It's a beautiful thing (even monkey love)
Your e-pal,
Diana
On Our Patron's behalf, I sank a pirate over the weekend and fed his crew to the sharks. His DSL account has been turned off, and the (UK-based) provider is really pissed off, to use the technical term. The idiot had about $50,000 cover price in books posted and promised to post more by the weekend. And was asking for donations to support his site!
Diana, can I say this to you without sounding mean:
PAUL WILLIAMS IS A HACK!! HACK HACK HACK!!!
Can't we find better song writers in the pantheon than this?
Ugg, Diana, rack not withstanding. :-)
Alex Jay, Bern, rich, and anyone else who I've forgotten,
Thanks for the pep talks. I didn't mean for everyone to tell their life stories and turn the place into Depression Central. Even though I'm not much older than most of the students, I was walking around and realized that most of those on campus weren't in high school when I left college. At 25, I'm not used to that kind of thinking. It's sort of strange.
So far so good. The anthropology class seems interesting and the professor seems like a good guy. Of course, it's too early to tell. The text books--even the used ones--are going to be a problem for me. I'll find a way.
Thanks again, all, for the kind words. I owe y'all (yes, Cindy, that's the Texas pronunciation, not the bastardized ghetto version prevelant in the mid-1990s).
Bill
DIANA WROTE;
"Cindy?
Nicest girl posting at the forum? We're kindred spirits; right? So you'll know I'm saying this for your own good...
***I think you need to re-read that label on your pain pills***
I bet if you check you'll see it actually says "take 2 every 6 hours" not "6 every 2 hours".
:=) :=) :=)
Sincerely
Diana G."
DIANA G.
Perhaps you should check the number of Haldol YOU are taking. Paul Williams tickets for 30 bucks a piece?????? Oh WAIT but they knock of TWO for being a senior citizen and kids are only TWENTY????? THAT'll bring 'em in by droves.
Honey, he AIN'T Mel Torme!
I PARTICULARLY loved the comment about there only being 199 seats so get your tickets ASAP.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You musta been jokin' right? Really you were kiddin' huh?
:)
I REMAIN over the moon with delight that Bill is going back to school THAT takes even more guts than building a PAUL WILLIAMS Website.
LOLOLOL!
Right back atcha, kiddo, FOR yer own good.
;)
AHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA!!!!!!
CATFIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:)
Cindy
Hello my underlings. :-)
Diana, sincerely, you want a good pro-war slant, go to the TedNugent.com website; that will set you up good sister. ;-)
---------------
I have a feeling the Cossack's would fall under Diana's spell and end up baking her a Quiche.
--------------
Eric, the good Chomsky is every time he opens his mouth. ;-)
------------
The only Farmer book I ever read was the one about the mark of the beast; probobly the most offensive novel I ever liked.
Brian's Humor Corner.
On a newsgroup, we regulars were asked by another regular to write Letters of Recommendation for her. While this is a terrific, intelligent, and well-liked person making the request, none of us could avoid writing funny recommendation letters. Here's what I came up with:
Dear Sirs;
It is my immense pleasure to recommend Miss Brown for any position you wish to hire her for. During her years in our organization, I found her to be a tough, smart, and capable employee with whom I could trust the most sensitive details of our operation. She is also extremely capable in our unique methods of client-service relations, and I would not hesitate to recommend her for similar work, for which she is well-suited. I would go so far as to say that I would be personally disappointed if Ms. Brown were not hired by your organization, and I would very much desire a personal, one-on-one meeting to discuss her future with your firm. I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Suge Knight
Death Row Records
P.S. The seating capacity at that theater is only 199, which is to say small, so if you do decide you want to go I suggest you order your tickets ASAP.
Diana
To Whom It May Concern:
Just in case anyone's interested, Paul Williams is going to be making a (rare) Southern California appearance on February 1st, at:
City of Brea's Curtis Theatre
1 Civic Center Circle
Brea, CA
The price for admisssion is, $30 (Seniors $28, kids $20)
The program's scheduled to begin at 8:00 PM
Tickets can be ordered in person at the box office during business hours,
by mail using an order form
by phone (714) 990-7722
(the url for where you can find the pdf order form for that is:
http://www.ci.brea.ca.us/docs/CURTIS_BROCHURE_2002-03.pdf)
You can pay with a credit card ($3.00 handling fee),
by fax,
on their website at
www.curtistheatre.org,
or by e-mail to
curtistheatre@ci.brea.ca.us.
If any of you decide to go, and you get to say hello to him, I'd be appreciative if you thought to mention where it was you learned he was going to be appearing there, and maybe you could mention my fan site? (I don't think he knows that I or the site exist)
Bye for now,
Diana
In the spirit of continuing one's education I just came across this on MSN--it says "5 tough SAT questions":
http://encarta.msn.com/quiz/quiz.asp?quizid=24
It weren't so tough. No mas, errr, I mean, math!
I have to agree with others here: while I finished my BA, it was through sheer inertia, low expectations, and the ability to crank out semi-coherent 20 pagers back in the pre-computer days.
If I have one regret, it's a typical one: that I didn't take more chances, course wise, and do something different and really limit-stretching. And all in the name of protecting a GPA that doesn't make a whit of difference to me (or anyone else) 22 years later.
Alex Jay: "Wow, what?"
Wow - as in a strong reaction to a particularly candid statement - a statement well said, to boot.
And one that illustrates my position perhaps too strongly as well. (though Jay's experience is my actual mirror - no degree at all after 4 1/2 years of time and money spent.) With my lack of formal degrees and such, I've ended up owning a slowly drowning family Jewelry store in a small town in the middle of rural western New York. But life is good. (I'm actually not complaining - education was an experience I would not trade, and I met the people who would become my lifelong friends there. But at this point in my life, 36, I'm not looking to go back... There are other ways to explore this world. I'm seeking a different path. But for those heading back to education, I raise a glass, and shout "Here! Here!" - good luck.)
Bern
"Tell her you know this great guy who owns a house in University City..."
Oh, I would. And you and she would REALLY get along, I'm sure. But sadly, she's married now. If it's any consolation, the man she married is a quarter-century her elder ...
So, let's see--the woman you're wanting is 30-40, preferably irreligious, smart, attractive, and creative, who's handy with a router and a tablesaw ... well, I DO know at least three women of that description. But I sigh. They, too, are all married. Hell, even the guy I grew up with, with whom I spent countless hours playing every possible competitive sport ending in -ball, who became a guitar prodigy who never much cared about the spotlight ... even HE's getting married next month.
Right now, I can think of only two or three in my closest circles of friends who AREN'T married--and as one of those is my ex, with whom I once went wedding-ring shopping, it's little consolation.
I'm hoping that the start of warmer weather, when I'll be able to practice guitar in the park before my lessons, will open up new dating possibilities for me, but I dunno. Seems a bit of a longshot.
I still say a Webderland Singles Servioce would be a good thing ...
Alex Berman wrote, with his usual candor and elegance:
"BRIAN: You're not 40. You CAN'T be 40. No one I KNOW is 40; they're either in their twenties, in their early thirties, or LONG past forty."
Hah. I WILL be forty. Really.
"Perhaps it's time to plan an early mid-life crisis? To flirt with the little hotpanted Britneys on campus? To sit in coffeehouses looking morose in hopes someone will ask you why? To buy an overexpensive penis-substitute of a car?"
Well, a new coffeehouse just opened at the corner of my block, which is nice because it gives me a hangout, but all of the other patrons are about fifteen to twenty years younger than I.
Living around Penn has taught me something truly interesting about the Generation Gap. Remember when this phrase made the rounds in the 1960s? What I've learned is this: Generation Gaps are made and enforced _by the young_. The people I know in their thirties, forties and fifties don't mind dealing with kids in their teens and twenties. It's fun: at the very least, we can tell them about Neat Stuff they haven't encountered yet. But when young'uns talk to people in my age bracket, one gets the sense that they're trying to talk over a barrier that they've imagined to be there. Ideas from the elders are taken with suspicion, as though they contain some hidden message of reaction or authority, or some taint of being geeky or socially unacceptable.
That's one thing I do like about fandom: fans do tend to have a wider date range of cultural references. They're more likely to know about, say, the Firesign Theatre or the Goon Show than most others.
"Or perhaps not. I've always seen growing OUT as a much better aim than growing UP: Growing OUT (and no; not the same as getting too thick in the waist for your favorite jeans) is an organic process, wherein you both branch out and spread your reach ever higher and wider into the sky, all the while putting down deeper and stronger roots ("If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?")."
Oh, one tries. There is the new camcorder, of course. And I'll probably pursue that guitar lesson plan.
"Subscribe to ReadyMade and decide to build a riser in the bedroom, or a conversation pit in the living room (flanked by the beercan candelabra, the tomato-cage lamp, and the flotsam futon). Join a small theater company. And have fun!"
The woodworking's anpther ongoing thing. Sadly, though, it's kind of solitary. It's a _lot_ more fun with someone else.
You know, I used to hope that I'd marry a woman who was smart, attractive, and creative. I now add "handy with a router and tablesaw" to the list of characteristics.
"Oop. Just realized: My second-best friend in the world turns 40 this year. Of course, such milestones are better left unnamed, as far as she's concerned ..."
Tell her you know this great guy who owns a house in University City...
Alex Berman wrote, with his usual candor and elegance:
"BRIAN: You're not 40. You CAN'T be 40. No one I KNOW is 40; they're either in their twenties, in their early thirties, or LONG past forty."
Hah. I WILL be forty. Really.
"Perhaps it's time to plan an early mid-life crisis? To flirt with the little hotpanted Britneys on campus? To sit in coffeehouses looking morose in hopes someone will ask you why? To buy an overexpensive penis-substitute of a car?"
Well, a new coffeehouse just opened at the corner of my block, which is nice because it gives me a hangout, but all of the other patrons are about fifteen to twenty years younger than I.
Living around Penn has taught me something truly interesting about the Generation Gap. Remember when this phrase made the rounds in the 1960s? What I've learned is this: Generation Gaps are made and enforced _by the young_. The people I know in their thirties, forties and fifties don't mind dealing with kids in their teens and twenties. It's fun: at the very least, we can tell them about Neat Stuff they haven't encountered yet. But when young'uns talk to people in my age bracket, one gets the sense that they're trying to talk over a barrier that they've imagined to be there. Ideas from the elders are taken with suspicion, as though they contain some hidden message of reaction or authority, or some taint of being geeky or socially unacceptable.
"Or perhaps not. I've always seen growing OUT as a much better aim than growing UP: Growing OUT (and no; not the same as getting too thick in the waist for your favorite jeans) is an organic process, wherein you both branch out and spread your reach ever higher and wider into the sky, all the while putting down deeper and stronger roots ("If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?")."
Oh, one tries. There is the new camcorder, of course. And I'll probably pursue that guitar lesson plan.
"Subscribe to ReadyMade and decide to build a riser in the bedroom, or a conversation pit in the living room (flanked by the beercan candelabra, the tomato-cage lamp, and the flotsam futon). Join a small theater company. And have fun!"
The woodworking's anpther ongoing thing. Sadly, though, it's kind of solitary. It's a _lot_ more fun with someone else.
You know, I used to hope that I'd marry a woman who was smart, attractive, and creative. I now add "handy with a router and tablesaw" to the list of characteristics.
"Oop. Just realized: My second-best friend in the world turns 40 this year. Of course, such milestones are better left unnamed, as far as she's concerned ..."
Tell her you know this great guy who owns a house in University City...
BRIAN: You're not 40. You CAN'T be 40. No one I KNOW is 40; they're either in their twenties, in their early thirties, or LONG past forty.
Perhaps it's time to plan an early mid-life crisis? To flirt with the little hotpanted Britneys on campus? To sit in coffeehouses looking morose in hopes someone will ask you why? To buy an overexpensive penis-substitute of a car?
Or perhaps not. I've always seen growing OUT as a much better aim than growing UP: Growing OUT (and no; not the same as getting too thick in the waist for your favorite jeans) is an organic process, wherein you both branch out and spread your reach ever higher and wider into the sky, all the while putting down deeper and stronger roots ("If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?").
So grow out. Take a guitar course at the U. and see how people look admiringly upon you as you stumble through the four chords you know. Subscribe to ReadyMade and decide to build a riser in the bedroom, or a conversation pit in the living room (flanked by the beercan candelabra, the tomato-cage lamp, and the flotsam futon). Join a small theater company. And have fun!
Oop. Just realized: My second-best friend in the world turns 40 this year. Of course, such milestones are better left unnamed, as far as she's concerned ...
Brian, I too just turned 40, and I majored in English literature as well.
Do I regret it? Sometimes. Since my father was a doctor, and I watched him work 60+ hours a week, I never desired to get into medicine, but certainly law or something like that could have proven lucrative. Then I could have been paid to rant.
Now I do computer administration, which pays the bills and the mortgage, but it can be dreary. I went back to school to get a masters in linguistics to get into education, which finally led to computers (in education), so even though I studied people like Chomsky (the good Chomsky, Frank) and Piaget, I'm still spending most of my time planning budgets and supervising PC technicians.
Not many people can find a vocation that serves as an avocation as well. Like Vonnegut said, nobody's hobby is insurance. But at 40, maybe the best thing to do is not worry about how you acquire the dough...I know it's tough, since men are so defined by what they do for a living, but I know I'm not willing to march back into the classroom anymore. Part of this is arrogance...the local schools here field a faculty with less ability than my own, in my humble opinion, and I can't afford to go to the Ivy Leagues. The other part is time...do I really want to take more tests, write more papers, and spend my evenings sitting in lectures? No.
So, this meandering post is leading to this: do what you want, the money will follow.
Re Alex Jay's comments about education. Although I didn't want to mention it here, as it might be seen as a cheap ploy for sympathy, I'm kind of in the same boat. I turn 40 next month, and I'm finally realizing how many _bad_ decisions I've made for my life-- and where certain personality flaws and psychological disorders have contributed to those bad decisions. In other words, I'm realizing that I have to grow up at 40.
One of those decisions was to major in English, when I could have studied a substantial and meaningful subject like medicine, the law, science, or business. Even though I work at Penn, and could havetaken courses for an advanced degree, I was very reluctant because I felt that academia was avoiding the Real World. And I didn't want to get an advanced degree in English-- as far as I was concerned, they printed those things on Marcal and Charmin.
Well, now I have a mortgage, and the prospect of a retirement without a safety net, so I have to get motivated on an actual career that'll keep a roof over my head.
Academia can provide the right traning to get yourself a fairly decent life if it's properly applied. It's a risk, re-entering college when you could be chasing a career. But if Bill works at it, he could reshape his life in terrific ways.
Now, all I have to do is establish myself as something more than a part-time Administrative Assistant with a ot of free time and odd interests.
Here's an odd item from the Guardian, at http://www.guardian.co.uk/arts/news/story/0,11711,883075,00.html:
"A Spanish art historian has uncovered what was alleged to be the first use of modern art as a deliberate form of torture, with the discovery that mind-bending prison cells were built by anarchist artists 65 years ago during the country's bloody civil war.
Bauhaus artists such as Kandinsky, Klee and Itten, as well as the surrealist film-maker Luis Bunuel and his friend Salvador Dali, were said to be the inspiration behind a series of secret cells and torture centres built in Barcelona and elsewhere, yesterday's El Pais newspaper reported."
BERN: Wow what?
JAY: I think Pierre's is the best costumer in town--and may well be the best non-NYC costumer on the East Coast.
http://www.costumers.com/home.html
From the website, I get the feeling they're willing to work with smaller companies as well as the big guys (the Russian Ballet, lots of team and corporate mascots) to best suit both needs and abilities. Looks like prices run on a sliding scale, and they give discounts for groups of ten or more.
And damn ... since I won't have a car until spring or early summer, I won't be able to try and make the auditions. Shame. I think I could probably fit one of your roles. Ah, well.
Hey - I went to college, maintained a 3.5 GPA, transferred twice and came away with nothing, not even an Associates degree for my 4 years. In fact, I dropped 15K on schooling that means little to nothing since I abandoned the job track those credits would have tied me to after graduation. It's even less potent now since 6 years have passed and the specialized training credit has expired and I'd have to take the courses over again.
But after 2 courses, I'd need a speech and a gym to earn a BA.
If I had the time or money, would I go back just to say I earned it? No, but I would go back for springtime in the quad to watch all the miniskirts in bloom, or maybe write a column for the student newspaper again in the interest of provoking the sheep. I did enjoy the radio station gig. All that freedom and none of the responsibility... not better days, but easier, more carefree ones.
Alex Jay, Brian..anyone else
Know any cooperative, reasonably priced, decent costume shop anywhere between Exton, Allentown and the Delaware River? Preferably, someone with a seamstress that can do alterations.
Also, I don't expect anyone outside the Harrisburg area to show up, but I'm excited to announce I'm holding my first auditions (instead of just picking people off the street or who were available as per usual) for our fanfilm movie "Hope Chest" in late February. (try to diagram that last sentence...I dare you.) We've got a funny script and, I think, a good chance to win or place in the Wizard magazine Direct-to-Video contest.
I need a distraction from the kids. Pam says I'm beginning to talk "baby edits" all the time, which means I'm using the word "potty" or saying "time for numnums" when there are no kids around.
Bill,
What Bern said about what Alex Jay said.
By the way, the best commercial last night was the one with Willie Nelson. Maybe the zebra looking into the replay monitor is a close second.
Bill - What Alex Jay Said.
Alex Jay - Wow.
Ber