Depression

General discussions of interest to readers and fans of Harlan Ellison.

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diane bartels
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Re: Depression

Postby diane bartels » Thu Jan 03, 2013 4:54 am

Steve, I would be on my way to California to live except for a couple things. Biggest one: fear. Fear of being alone, not finding a job, having to do a lot of things myself that I now get help with. The other things are I really do love Chicago; my family and all my friends except you guys here are in Chicago; my doctors are here; I am attached to all my stuff and there is a lot of things - furniture, clothes, books. And my one brother lives with me, is dependent on me right now. Otherwise I would love to be where their was no snow, where the writing field might be easier to break into, and where I could see you and Cris and Harlan and Susan and Lori and Gwynnie on a regular basis.

On an up note, things have gotten better for me thought wise and depression wise. Looking forward to finding work, family is in a little better shape and talked some friends over the holiday. Will see my best friend Friday. She is a big reason why I stay here. Moving is something I think about though, more for the above reasons. DB

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FrankChurch
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Re: Depression

Postby FrankChurch » Thu Jan 03, 2013 10:40 am

Parts of California are seedy, but it can be a lovely place. What I hate about it is you have to drive everywhere. Certainly not sustainable.

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Rick Keeney
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Re: Depression

Postby Rick Keeney » Mon Apr 15, 2013 9:00 am

I don't think I've posted here before. I regret that. I appreciate the sort of fortitude it takes to share. You're all heroic to me. All of you who suffer. Good on all of you.

From what I saw in my several visits, San Francisco seems to have an efficient transit system. Sounds like thread drift to me. Except that being present in the City by the Bay seems to buoy my spirits enormously. And I've visited in every season. All one of them.

The Fillmore was frosting.

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FrankChurch
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Re: Depression

Postby FrankChurch » Mon Apr 15, 2013 9:30 am

Haven't been there since I was a wee lad. Wish I could go.

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Rick Keeney
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Re: Depression

Postby Rick Keeney » Thu May 09, 2013 8:04 pm

This looks...important. At any rate, its helpful for me. It's given me an awareness I lacked:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2 ... t-two.html

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Samuel John Klein
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Re: Depression

Postby Samuel John Klein » Thu May 09, 2013 8:16 pm

Rick Keeney wrote:This looks...important. At any rate, its helpful for me. It's given me an awareness I lacked:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2 ... t-two.html


I coudn't make it through it, myself. Very courageous writing, but it hit waaaaaaaaay to close to home. Several times.

Sam.
Born this way.
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Re: Depression

Postby Moderator » Sat May 11, 2013 8:47 am

FrankChurch wrote:Parts of California are seedy, but it can be a lovely place. What I hate about it is you have to drive everywhere. Certainly not sustainable.


Very valid point. It's true that very little is within an east walk for most of us, and transit here is not what it is in other places (though bus service is greatly improved over the '90s).

There is a lot to be said for smaller, more concentrated towns when it comes to happiness. It improves health to walk, and that alone can improve your state if mind. Being caught in traffic is as stressful as Seattle's much-vaunted cloud cover when it comes to depressive influences.
- I love to find adventure. All I need is a change of clothes, my Nikon, an open mind and a strong cup of coffee.

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FrankChurch
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Re: Depression

Postby FrankChurch » Sat May 11, 2013 9:24 am

Green space is the key to it all, Barber babee.

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Lori Koonce
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Re: Depression

Postby Lori Koonce » Sat May 11, 2013 3:01 pm

@Frank: Meaning no disrespect, but if dealing with depression was as easy as you and most others seem to think it is, then why the hell do so many suffer, not just emotionally but physically suffer.

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Samuel John Klein
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Re: Depression

Postby Samuel John Klein » Sat May 11, 2013 8:44 pm

Lori Koonce wrote:@Frank: Meaning no disrespect, but if dealing with depression was as easy as you and most others seem to think it is, then why the hell do so many suffer, not just emotionally but physically suffer.


Yeah. She's right. It's hell. I was hospitalized for it once, and I have coping strategies, but I've come to realize as I become Of A Certain Age that being a functioning aphasic has been in literal terms a danse macabre.

Would it were that I could be the kind that can't comprehend why it's impossible just to 'get over it'.

Hell, I have to deal with it, and I can't comprehend why it's impossible just to 'get over it'.

Sam.
Samuel John Klein, your friend, and your friend, and mine too
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Samuel John Klein
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Re: Depression

Postby Samuel John Klein » Sat May 11, 2013 8:50 pm

Barber wrote:
FrankChurch wrote:Parts of California are seedy, but it can be a lovely place. What I hate about it is you have to drive everywhere. Certainly not sustainable.


Very valid point. It's true that very little is within an east walk for most of us, and transit here is not what it is in other places (though bus service is greatly improved over the '90s).


I must admit to the most dear respect and affection for California. I am, as I am all-to-wont to point out, an Oregonian. When I was growing up, it was fashionable to bag on Cali and Californians; we all thought at the time that they wanted to move up here and create of Oregon (a state whose governor famously appealed to tourists to visit often, but please don't move here to live) a Alta Alta California.

Time and maturity have caused major changes in my outlook. I finally got to visit California once (sadly, it was Sacramento, but beggars can't be choosers). It's truly an awesome place with much to celebrate and be proud of. Of course, as big as it is, there's a lot of crayzee there too. When you eat granola (if I may be allowed to edit a tired aphorism) you have to take the fruit and nuts and the flakes along withal.

I'll always be a rather-smug Oregonian (if you're born here, you can't help it, it'll get ya eventually) but I've gotten past the "Don't Califnornicate Oregon" mindset. When it comes to that wonderful crazy place called California, I'll always be a fan. But staying here in Oregon gives me kind of a front-row seat.

After all, we do share a border.

Sam.
Reformed Schludwiller Drinker.
Samuel John Klein, your friend, and your friend, and mine too
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Somewhere in Southeast Portland. The banal part.

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Chuck Messer
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Re: Depression

Postby Chuck Messer » Sat May 11, 2013 8:57 pm

The human body is a chemical factory. It maintains a complex balance of biochemicals to maintain the function of the internal organs; heart, liver, stomach, kidneys, etc. Any imbalance in those chemicals can cause those organs to malfunction, or at least to function differently. The human brain is not somehow magically immune. It works through chemical and electrical impulses. Throw the balance off, and the brain's functions are thrown off. Serotonin is believed to be one of the culprits that causes clinical depression. Ecstasy stimulates the production of serotonin, causing the euphoria felt by anyone who ingests it. Hell, pot, LSD, those all have chemical effects on the brain.

I'd call the fact that depression is a physical problem a no-brainer, but that would be a pun. Sort of.

Chuck
Some people are wedded to their ideology the way nuns are wed to God.

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Lori Koonce
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Re: Depression

Postby Lori Koonce » Fri Aug 09, 2013 4:01 pm

I've tried on and off for the past two weeks to post here. And for some fucked up and totally not understood reason I haven't been able to....

But you guys are as much my family as the real live people are, and I owe it to you to be as honest as I can be. And gang I'm rather scared. Even with weekly therapy sessions I am finding myself doing yet another one of my spirals. And it seems that this one is going to be a bitch. Not like the one that finally got my ass booted out of my parents, but pretty damned close.

So, if I don't show up here at them forum as much as ya think I should, ya know why.

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Steve Evil
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Re: Depression

Postby Steve Evil » Fri Aug 09, 2013 5:28 pm

Post if it helps. Feel free to message me on FB if you need to rant. (I also provide scapegoating services for trusted clients :wink: ) Stay strong. . .

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Lori Koonce
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Re: Depression

Postby Lori Koonce » Fri Aug 09, 2013 5:36 pm

Thanks Mr Evil

I think that the biggest problem is that I'm slowly coming around to accepting that this is my life for however many days of it are left. Three weeks ago I was getting ready to meet the second most important male in my life and now I,m wondering why I bothered. Life is loosing its beautiful warm patina.


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