Spill yer guts.

General discussions of interest to readers and fans of Harlan Ellison.

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FrankChurch
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby FrankChurch » Sun Apr 28, 2013 11:45 am

Subtle, but good there Douglas.

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Rick Keeney
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby Rick Keeney » Tue Apr 30, 2013 8:37 am

Why, Frank?

Why "subtle, but good?"

Examples, please?

Does one preclude the other, as your comment suggests? I am unclear about that oddly contradictory sentence.
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I appreciate the simplicity of your poem, Douglas. Nearly all single syllable words. It's difficult to pack meaning into a 24 word piece. The idea of things undone despite the best of intentions is a common human struggle. A poem that makes the reader think, "Me too." Plus, of all things, A RHYME!! That is refreshing.

It all comes down to dust, doesn't it?

Thanks for sharing.

Now we're all waiting on Diane...tickticktick

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FrankChurch
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby FrankChurch » Tue Apr 30, 2013 10:30 am

Sometimes subtle gets under your skin more.

I'm far from subtle, but you already knew that.

diane bartels
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby diane bartels » Tue Apr 30, 2013 3:53 pm

Rick, my friend, don't hold your breath waiting for me. Sometimes it takes me a long time to do something, especially if it's something I am a little nervous about. I will get some of my poems up here, if not today then tomorrow.

diane bartels
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby diane bartels » Thu May 02, 2013 4:51 pm

ok day late but here are some of my poems. Would love feedback.

BELIEVING

Flickering candles emphasize mystery
in a dimly lit gray church
where the soul's flame
fights a cold mind.
Victory is an Act of Faith.

That's one I wrote in college.

diane bartels
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby diane bartels » Thu May 02, 2013 4:55 pm

IN THE MUSIC DEPT.
(for Patrick N and his music)
Down musty corridors where
blended harmonies
shimmer the silence
iridescence or the Music
in unseen corners
sparkles anew.

written for a college friend who played a mean piano

diane bartels
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby diane bartels » Thu May 02, 2013 4:59 pm

gotta go find the later ones. I'm looking mostly at my college stuff right now.

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Chuck Messer
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby Chuck Messer » Tue May 07, 2013 1:40 am

Things have been quiet around here.

Too quiet.

One can hear crickets chirping.

So, here's something I wrote a while back when experiencing one of our Artillery Barrage thunderstorms. The title was "Slice of a Storm", a kind of play on Slice of Life. I don't like the title.

LIGHTNING.
An Air-splitting Nuclear Flash, followed in two seconds by a godawfulwrathofheaven thunderclap. A searing sound that shriveled mere words like "thunder" and "lightning", sounding like an artillery barrage in the front yard. The - for lack of a better word - "thunderclap", was followed by a crackling echo that trampled the countryside and shook every house in its path with a mailed fist.
The echo rumbled off into the distance followed by....
Silence:
The sound of every living thing; even the grass, holding its breath.
Waiting for the black, sagging clouds to reload for another barrage.

** Another Image of the Storm **

Mother Nature.
Not the kindly, large-busted madonna with a garland of flowers in her hair.
More like Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford.
Eyes bugged out, nostrils flared, lips curled back, and brandishing that wicked looking hanger.
"What are you doing coming after me?" I plead from under the dining table. "I didn't build that goddamned interstate! Ask anyone!"
"No excuses!" She bellows.
"And no wire hangers!"
Some people are wedded to their ideology the way nuns are wed to God.

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FrankChurch
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby FrankChurch » Tue May 14, 2013 10:58 am

This aint me, this is the soul artist Van Hunt. Good stuff:

She sleeps with the moonlight under her head And the stars to keep her warm Far from the noise and the world below She comes to me in my dreams like a love song And I awake only to hear her go
Somewhere along the way I lost the melody And I don't want the birds to sing, sing it to me
'Cause I love to hate the feeling Don't wanna deal with the morning after What can I say to keep it down? What can I say to keep it down? What can I say to keep your love around me?

Nice.

Gwyneth M905
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby Gwyneth M905 » Tue May 28, 2013 12:46 am

The Witch (ottava rima - after Blake)

Blinded by the Inquisition's holy Might,
The Purger's source of Carnal'ty Remark'd,

"Although I now can never See the Light,
I have no need to fear the waiting dark."

Though Fire consum'd her Form before his sight
It could not the Lust within the Patriarch.

And who's to say which One did burn in Hell --
The witch, or Him on whom was cast her spell?
******************************************************************

Take Back the Night Rally

Nothing like that has ever happened to me, but
in some ways I understand violation
(words bound like a foot upon themselves
their meaning bent underneath and festering)

I can't say anything like that has happened to me
(lips sewn like the ripped edges of a vagina
left to fester under urine-soaked bandages)

I can't say that (something like that happened --
in some ways that happened to me)

I understand violation but, I can't say anything.
****************************************************************************

For Trust Betrayed

If I could
I would call the moon
to stare through your window
and drive you mad.
If I dared
I would bring down the fire
in a fennel-stalk
to burn your fields.
If I told the wind
to cut your skin
I would bring the salt
to bind your wounds.
If mine were the lot
to watch you jump
I would turn my back
to the cliff's edge
and pick a blade of grass
to mark your grave on the wind.
*************************************************
Eros/Iræ

Strong body
firm, warm boy-body
man's body. Held a woman
tight against you, snug and safe
the golden firelight touching you
like the fine harp-strings of her hair.
Chest and shoulders broad and
oiled with the sweat of the move-
ment of your thighs together - yours
and hers. Thighs and lean hips
and bellies curving to a point --
you arched together in the firelight.

Bent body
stiff, cold boy-body --
man's body. Hold the earth
tight against you, lost and mired
the cold moonlight riming you
like the coarse rain-drops from the sky
Chest and shoulders twisted and
shattered by the shrapnel from the move-
ment of your troops together - yours
and his. Troops and bloody lips
and eyes staring at a point
You arch alone in the moonlight.

***************************************
Fragmented

If this were a just world
All love created equal
I would not need to study the ground
when you walk past.

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NeonMosfet
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby NeonMosfet » Tue May 28, 2013 10:13 am

Those were pretty good. I like those.

Gwyneth M905
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby Gwyneth M905 » Tue May 28, 2013 3:11 pm

NeonMosfet wrote:Those were pretty good. I like those.


Thank you, Neon! :)

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Ezra Lb.
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby Ezra Lb. » Tue May 28, 2013 6:12 pm

Yes Gywneth very nice indeed!

Hey NeonMosfet welcome back to you too!

:D

I love it when the place fills up with womenfolk.
“We must not always talk in the marketplace,” Hester Prynne said, “of what happens to us in the forest.”
-Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Scarlet Letter

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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby Moderator » Tue May 28, 2013 10:04 pm

Ezra Lb. wrote:Yes Gywneth very nice indeed!

Hey NeonMosfet welcome back to you too!

:D

I love it when the place fills up with womenfolk.


Woohooo!

Glad to have these voices return to the fold.
- I love to find adventure. All I need is a change of clothes, my Nikon, an open mind and a strong cup of coffee.

diane bartels
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Re: Spill yer guts.

Postby diane bartels » Wed May 29, 2013 12:02 am

Excellent poems, Gwynn. Thanks for sharing.


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