The 25 Things About Me Facebook meme

General discussions of interest to readers and fans of Harlan Ellison.

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Barney Dannelke
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The 25 Things About Me Facebook meme

Postby Barney Dannelke » Tue Jan 27, 2009 1:08 pm

In the last 36 hours I was tagged 7 times by my Facebook friends to participate in this or, toss one off. "Toss one off" was where I started. I really don't do much in the way of confessional writing. In any case this thing ended up being a little bit bigger than I intended and a few other Webderlanders are trying their hands at it so I thought I would create a thread for them.

I would suggest commenting on each other's Facebook page and not here - or not just here. But I'm not gonna be pissy about it no matter what. It's just a Facebook meme.

- Barney
History is a vast early warning system. -Norman Cousins (1915-1990)

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Barney Dannelke
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Postby Barney Dannelke » Tue Jan 27, 2009 1:13 pm

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people, then click publish.)

*********************************************************

25 Things About Me.

1.) I don’t trust something that begins with “I” 25 times in a row. A few years ago I wouldn’t have even blinked at the prospect of writing something that self-centered but now I’m getting very cautious about displaying a certain kind of vanity - and this is that kind.

2.) I’m sure I have not lived for others nearly enough and I hope to get better at that going forward. But I fear saying it and doing it are two different things. I also wish I had more resources to do more things for more people - and have come to resent with all of my little tiny soul that there are only 24 hours in a day. I despise sleep. My first genie wish would be no more sleep for me – ever.

3.) Having said that, my dreams are pretty damned good. In my twenties and even into my thirties they were terrible. Nightmares. Violence. Just the worst things I could imagine. Now my dreams, when I remember them, begger all description. People talk about dreaming in black & white or in color. Last night I had a dream with a Giorgio Moroder soundtrack and with silent movie title cards (I remember the font) and the entire thing was shot in blue and yellow and green gels. The night before that the music was by Carl Stalling and featured The Wolf from Tex Avery cartoons having a barnyard adventure with Salvador Dali. Dreams are the best part of my day far too often. But I still hate to go to sleep and fight it Like Ali fought Foreman.

4.) I think about my father a lot these days. He’s been dead about 25 years and although we never resolved anything and I had a very low opinion of him at the time of his death – and in many ways still do… Nevertheless, even though I’ve let almost all of the old hatreds and disappointments go, I find myself thinking about him and I don’t know why. It’s not a date or specific circumstances and I’m a decade younger than he was when he checked out – but he keeps popping up. It’s…strange.

5.) I worried a lot for decades that I would either become an alcoholic like my father or need some sort of psychotropic regulation like my mother. It turns out that while I have a rainbow coalition of quirks and flaws I’m not really either a boozer or border-line crazy. Ignore what my avatars indicate or others might say. It’s just not true.

6.) I am not suicidal. And I never have been. I have never once actually put that card on the table in my own mind. Ever. I make lots of jokes about cheap one bullet health care and walking far out in the woods on a real cold night and taking my clothes off and freezing myself to the side of a tree. I almost froze to death once as a kid in Wisconsin and it’s a nice way to go (trust me) - but the truth is, I like it here and it’s going to take some incredible cascade of awfulness for me to ever consider leaving the stage short of getting hooked. And bring a sturdy hook. Yeah, I’m looking at you over there.

7.) I don’t have a lot of hate left. If you are a racist or you would hit a woman – or a child. Fine. I hate you. Come around me with that and you will see how forceful and effective my hate can be. But I’m letting a lot of the little hate go.

8.) I switched over from coffee to tea last year. Dropped 10 pounds faster than I would have thought possible. It’s great. I still drink coffee but I see it as “backsliding” now. Sounds like a little thing. But for me it wasn’t.

9.) I have high blood pressure. Without medication it’s science fictional. Something like 215 over 160. I can’t imagine why I was short tempered or my toes changed colors or I could hear my pulse in my own ears 24/7. Can you?


10.) I worry that I have not read enough of the right books even though anyone who knows me knows I’m always with a book or books while awake. And, mostly when I’m asleep. I want to read a big chunk of the Russian novels and lots of other world literature. I want to read a nice chunk of the Greek plays and philosophy. But then I get weak and read some genre trash instead. Maybe not “trash” but an easy out. Nothing that would run the risk of a transformative experience.

11.) I am an atheist. This is my absolute default setting. I have my reasons and they are what they are. Should you ever want - or need to talk about this to me I will oblige you. Happily. But I’m not looking for converts. I just want to be allowed to not believe in whatever I don’t believe in. Just don’t ever assume that I’m fronting on this or that I have had second thoughts. I walked away from all theology and theosophy when I was in my teens. Read a lot. Refined my position on what it meant to be an atheist and how I ought to interact with the world – as an atheist. And here I am. I do regret (a very little) that there are certain religious texts (not just the Bible) that I’ve never read all the way through, because now I know I never will. I lose no sleep over this. [see thing #3]

12.) I let a couple of people really punch me in the balls last year. I’m still here and so are my balls – but I’m not quite the same person as I was two years ago. Change and growth are good but getting hit by trains is more change than I’d rather take on all at once as it were.

13.) I’m opening a bookstore, comic shop, music venue outside of Nazareth, PA and I’m hoping it will be a destination spot and not a disaster – but we shall see. Or, I shall see at the very least.

14.) I have Three Big Writing Projects to do in this life. One non-fiction book, one fiction and one play. If you know me even a little I have probably bored you to tears or driven you to drink having to listen to me yammer on about them. I am sorry about that. All I can say is that to the best of my ability I will finish these three things. There are other things but these three are what I would like to be remembered for. And my daughter. Don’t worry Kyla – you are #25.

15.) I have some scars on my legs that I was very self-conscious of. One long one from having my Achilles tendon re-attached and a bunch of little ones that look like cigarette burns but are really some very nasty old spider bites. Now they don’t bother me.

16.) Others who have done this essay have often talked about how long they thought they might live. I never had the sense when I was young that I would check out by a certain date. Now I just have “goals” of a sort. I have already out lived my grandfather on my father’s side. He died in his early 40’s during the depression of pneumonia when my father was three. My father had no memories of his father. In many ways my entire family history is like an etch a sketch that keeps getting shaken. My father was 58. I am 49. I would very much like to outlive him by at least 10 or 15 years. And to finish my work. I never smoked and I could never drink like my dad did so I have a shot. But just a shot. I’m a big guy and gravity and entropy takes the big ones earlier. Some days though I feel like I have a third Act and maybe a fourth Act in me. It’s a good way to feel.

17.) Mr. Mark was a friend of mine but honestly, not a CLOSE friend. But when he killed himself it was like someone nuked the entire Lehigh Valley Art Scene. I still think about him about every other day and I still have his little funeral service card where I can see it. One of my small persistent fears is that I did something that “traded” on his death. I don’t think I did. I never meant to. But sometimes it nags at me. And if any of his other friends thought that of me, well, that would just rip me up. It really would.

18.) Almost ALL of my friends are younger than me. MANY of them twenty years or so younger than me. Part of that is that my older friends moved out of the Lehigh Valley and never looked back but much of it is I really like being around people younger than I am. It’s a cheat because I am in no way smarter than my friends. In fact dumber than at least three or four of them. The ONLY edge I have left is a slight sense of historical context so I can slap together a metaphor. I am base. I will take whatever advantage I can get. ;-)

19.) Travel … When I was younger I did not want to travel abroad. Didn’t much matter because the money was not there and life kept happening. Now I would like to. At least one person I know would see that as a sort of betrayal. I’m sorry. People change.

20.) Food and cooking… This is part of the third act. I will learn to do this better. It’s not like learning how to dunk or running the 4 minute mile. This can still be learned and I will learn it.

21.) So much less frightens me.

22.) I think things will get better. That’s the gist of it. For all of us. There will be hiccups. Bad things will keep right on happening. There are 6 billion of us and some of us are real assholes. But there are 6 billion of us. And it only takes a few of us to transform the whole world. Build a better wheat plant. End polio. Invent the things that are needed. We are clever clever monkeys. The universe seems to WANT to make itself more interesting and more complicated. We should just role with that wave. Things will get better.

23.)… I can’t talk about that. Sorry.

24.) On being in a State of Grace. A stupid thing for an atheist to say? Bite me. I was born the year the Ruskies put up Sputnik. I have seen the ENTIRE history of the Space Program and for many years I thought that was The Big Thing that I would get to see in my life time. Then they invented the internet. I worked with some real early main-frame computers the size of school busses in the 1970’s that took punch card input and ran on the command line interface. Now my toaster has a computer in it, my daughter has an iPhone (PURE science fiction when I was in high school) and my little Sony Erikson cell phone knows more music than I do and sings me Tom Waits songs when people I like call me. But that’s not all. Remember my remarks about racism? Barack Obama is MY President. And yours. Sometimes I feel like I’ve willed myself out of a dull universe and into an interesting and better one. Where we go to the moon. Where information is a click away. Where Millions and Millions of people decide all at once that some mode of thought is bullshit and just walk away from it. So, right now… Right NOW, I feel as though I am living in a state of grace.

25.) My daughter. Kyla Renee Dannelke. An even bigger surprise to me than 24 is this… for whatever reason I’m pretty damned sure that my daughter loves me – and knows that I love her. We’re an all German heritage and sometimes Germans don’t do affection the way it should be done. “U R doing it wrong” comes to mind. And I honestly thought that there would be some buffer of time where she would just say, “Fuck you Dad, I hate you” and she’d walk away for a few years and then we would work shit out. But oddly that never seemed to happen and then a couple of years ago I realized this was me projecting my messed up relationship with my father on to her and that with her it would be a whole different deal. So, … well, the last thing about me is that as long as that lasts I’m glad for that.

- Barney Dannelke 01/26/09

--

Whenever people say 'We mustn't be sentimental,' you can take it they are about to do something cruel. And if they add 'We must be realistic,' they mean they are going to make money out of it. - Brigid Brophy (1929-1995)

"I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if he didn't."
-Jules Renard, writer (1864-1910)
History is a vast early warning system. -Norman Cousins (1915-1990)

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FrankChurch
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Postby FrankChurch » Tue Jan 27, 2009 5:39 pm

Facebook is for kids. Barber poked you, Peggy poked you--are we infants?

Where's my binkie?

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Postby Moderator » Tue Jan 27, 2009 5:41 pm

I rather liked reading Barney's list and am going to start work on my own shortly. It ties nicely into my NOW Life List...
- I love to find adventure. All I need is a change of clothes, my Nikon, an open mind and a strong cup of coffee.

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Jan
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Postby Jan » Tue Jan 27, 2009 5:53 pm

Barney, you have come to us to do penance.

But we can not forgive you for we sense that there is more, much more.

You must go and meditate.

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FrankChurch
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Postby FrankChurch » Tue Jan 27, 2009 5:55 pm

Barney's a gem.

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Postby Steve Evil » Tue Jan 27, 2009 11:16 pm

I got tagged this way earlier. Still haven't thought of twenty five things to say yet. Yours are probably more interesting that 99% if the others I am sure are out there. . .

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Postby David Loftus » Thu Jan 29, 2009 1:40 pm

I posted 16 a month ago and a different 25 this month.

Maybe I'll try to come up with another 25.

Have to say Barney's are more thoughtful and better written than mine. My Random Facts tend to be more teasing and exhibitionistic. I already edited out the one about most unusual sex.
War is, at first, the hope that one will be better off; next, the expectation that the other fellow will be worse off; then, the satisfaction that he isn't any better off; and, finally, the surprise at everyone's being worse off. - Karl Kraus

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Postby Moderator » Thu Jan 29, 2009 2:35 pm

David Loftus wrote:I already edited out the one about most unusual sex.


Damn.

:evil:
- I love to find adventure. All I need is a change of clothes, my Nikon, an open mind and a strong cup of coffee.

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Postby Lori Koonce » Thu Jan 29, 2009 2:51 pm

Barber wrote:
David Loftus wrote:I already edited out the one about most unusual sex.


Damn.

:evil:



I'm with you Barber. I want to know if anyone can beat mine!!!!

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Postby Alan Coil » Thu Jan 29, 2009 7:24 pm

25 things about me:

1. I make it a rule to not do internet memes.

2. I'm not comfortable talking about my private life.

3. I've always been this way.

4. I have always felt a disconnect from most of the rest of humanity.

5. I enjoy being by myself...most of the time.

6. #7 is why I don't do memes.

7. I have nothing more to say at this time.

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Postby Moderator » Thu Jan 29, 2009 8:09 pm

I know you're all calling it a meme, but -- to me -- it's more a shortform personal manifesto.
- I love to find adventure. All I need is a change of clothes, my Nikon, an open mind and a strong cup of coffee.

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Postby Jan » Mon Feb 02, 2009 6:58 pm

How far have you got so far Steve? Don't forget to mention that you want to be more like me and in what ways.

I wrote a personal manifesto when I was about 22. Never looked at it. Don't remember why I did it. Boredom?

I can never put myself into words and be remotely satisfied with any of it the next day.

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Postby reddragon70 » Tue Feb 03, 2009 5:25 am

25 things about me. damn this is gonna be tough.... Ok here goes

1. I am a train driver and have been for the past 10 years. Though worked for the same company for 18 years.

2. I am socialist, not a communist, there is a difference you know.

3. I named my son after the spaceship Talyn from Farscape (yeah I am sad)

4. I have 27 out of 30 first editions of Robert Rankin's books

5. I met my wife through chatting on the internet one drunken night after I had drunk half a bottle of Jack daniels. Strange but true

6. I wore a kilt to my wedding in Melbourne Australia. (yes I DID do the true Scotsman thing, so did my best man.)

7. I have recently taken up Archery, which I am really enjoying

8. I took up archery because I cant join a shooting club any more as most of them are gone. I used you be a crack shot with a rifle you see.

9. I have been what is known as a "goth" for about the past 23 years. Yup since 1985 when I first heard The Sisters Of Merxy

10. I really hate these dumb kids who THINK theyre goths. Theyre bloody not. Marylin Manson and Korn are NOT goth

11. I am an avid reader but I am also a collector of first editions. I have lost count of how many I have

12. I completed Fallout 3 in 10 days. This REALLY pissed of my wife cos she hardly saw me LOL

13. My friends and I got Janny Wurts and her husband seriously drunk on Scottish beer at Albacon just before her guest of honour speech. Oops

14. I used to play teh card game Magic The Gathering. In fact I was invited to go to a tournament in the US by Wizards of the coast guys cos I came up with some really weird assed decks.

15. I once met Sigourney Weaver and boy is she bloody tall

16. I have also met Claudia Christian, she was delightful and even more pretty in real life than she is on TV.

17. My leather jacket has a painting of HR Gigers Landscape 18 on the back. Well part of it anyway.

18. Every year my wife and I hold a Halloween party. Its become quite a social event amongst our friends. We all try to out do each others costumes. Last year I was Dr Zoidberg from Futurama

19. I have point blank refused to go see The Day The earth Stood still with Keanu reaves. Partly because i heard it stinks but mostly because some things are sacred to me and a remake of that film is a heresy to my mind.

20. I have 1 tattoo, a red dragon on my chest and 6 piercings. Dont ask

21. I love good computer games. Especially RPGs and MMORPGs like Everquest and World of warcraft

22. I am starting to really worry about my parents. theyre both in their 70's now and my dad 'd health is really starting to be an issue.

23. I am now really pissed at my employer. I applied for a promotion 7 months ago and have heard nothing. Mind you theyre asking for redundancies in supervisory and management grades

24. There are times I wish that I had followed my friend John and emigrated to Australia. The only thing is if I had I wouldnt have met my wife. So no regrets

25. One day I intend to own an Addams Family pinball machine. Its the best pinball ever created and I love it. Just dont tell my wife.... she would kill me.

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Postby Moderator » Tue Feb 03, 2009 6:42 am

Nicely done as well Red. (Talyn is a very cool name, regardless of the origin.)


Jan wrote:How far have you got so far Steve? Don't forget to mention that you want to be more like me and in what ways.


Those are the first 23 references, but I'm having trouble defining numbers 24 and 25.
- I love to find adventure. All I need is a change of clothes, my Nikon, an open mind and a strong cup of coffee.


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